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I wake up with a pain in my hand and laying on a hospital gurney. I try to move, but then I feel a slight pain in my abdomen. A nurse walks over and asks me to rate my pain. I can’t feel much if anything so I give her a low number. A few minutes later she tells me that I’m being taken to my room and that my husband will be there to meet me.
Husband. She must be mixing her patients up I don’t have a husband. I doze back off since they got me on some hella drugs. When I wake up again I’m being pushed down a hall and into a room. There waiting is Anthony and he not only looks worried, he looks angry. Oh Fuck what did I do. When everyone leaves he explains to me that he had to say that we were engaged to be able to stay with me during my treatment.
He tells me that Kathy and Chris will be taking care of Luke while I’m recovering in the hospital. That’s great, now would someone tell me how I ended up in the hospital? Apparently Anthony can see some of the confusion and he finally explains.
“You weren’t eating this morning and then when I stopped to lay you down on the bench seat I noticed you were running a fever. I gave you some fever reducer, but it didn’t help much. So, by the time I got to Wichita Falls I decided it was time to take you to the hospital.”
I can tell that he wants to ask me something, but he holds back and lets me rest. That’s about how the next few days are spent. He’s in the visitors chair cat napping as I constantly sleep. He isn’t taking care of himself and I’m worrying about him. The nurses are constantly in my room asking me to rate my pain, check my vitals, or change medication bags. On the third day the nurse who is changing my medication bags also does something with the bandage on my stomach. I had noticed the doctor checking on the area, but I didn’t know what exactly I had surgery for.
I ask the nurse, “What are you doing?”
“Just checking your colostomy bag. Don’t worry we will educate you how to do it on your own before we release you. Right now you need to focus on healing.”
“Colostomy bag?” I question her.
“Yes from your surgery.” That’s when Anthony tells her he’ll explain when she leaves. She finishes doing what she needs to do and then leaves.
Anthony takes my good arm and kisses my knuckles. He’s completely shaved his face and now it is starting to grow back in. The stubble he’s growing from not shaving tickles as it grates across the back of my hand. “Babe, I know that you’re curious as to what has happened over the last few days. First let me tell you that yes, you heard the nurse right there is a colostomy bag at the surgery site.” He takes a deep breath before continuing. “You had what the doctor called an intestinal abscess. Apparently, there were several splinters in your intestines. I can only imagine how they got there.” He finishes and I can see the anger towards my ex in his eyes.
I knew that Jeff owned an old wooden police baton, and that when he’d jammed something in my ass it had hurt. I had bled for days after that, but I never would have thought he’d shove that up my ass. Anthony breaks my thoughts when he asks me, “I really don’t want to ask this, but were you aware of what was being put in there?”
I must have turned beet red in embarrassment because he didn’t rush me to answer. “No. It’s one of those things he did that I didn’t agree to.” I was so quiet about it that he had to lean in so that he could hear me.
He taps me gently on the shoulder and says, “Okay the doctor had asked me if you were into anal sex, and I told him that we didn’t, but as for your prior relationships I wasn’t sure.” He pauses only momentarily he then finishes with, “He said with the abscess the size it was that the splinters had to have been there for several months. I knew that when you got to Kathy’s house they said you were walking funny, so I figured he’d done it just before you left him.”
I can’t answer him. This is all too hard to take in. I’m pooping in a bag because the asshole ex boyfriend of mine didn’t just rape me with his dick he’d shoved objects inside of me. Anthony has figured out the kind of abuse that I had gone through. I know once I’m well he’ll make me and Luke leave, who wants a woman with such a past in their life. I bet he’s happy that we didn’t have sex those couple of times that we came close to it.
He sits back down in his chair and grabs his phone. His fingers are flying over the keyboard and with the intensity that he’s typing I know he’s angry. Probably angry enough to kill. I don’t ask him what he’s doing, because I’m pretty sure that I know. He’s probably making sure its okay to drop me off at Kathy’s house once I’m released from the hospital.
I’ve dozed and the days are blurring together. Anthony hasn’t left my side, he’d only run down to the gift shop and bought some clean clothes while I was sleeping one day. He has taken a couple of showers while I was asleep over the days, but he said they didn’t have his trimmer, so I’d better get used to the scruff,for now, because he’s not leaving the hospital unless its with me.
Today the nurse comes in and teaches both of us how to change my colostomy bag. It seems so easy to do, one would think, but there is a process you have to do so not to get a blockage or spill crap all over yourself. She says the next few times it needs changed that she’ll have us do it so that when we leave, in the next few days, we will be comfortable with the procedure. She also makes me get out of bed and start walking. I didn’t realize that having your stomach cut open could hurt so bad when you’re trying to walk. I know I can’t afford this bill, so I’m pushing myself to get to the goals that the doctors wants me to meet before discharge.
Today I over did it. I walked to the nurses desk which is in the middle of the floor. All of the rooms seem to be at either end of the hall. When I got there the nurse on duty was shocked to see me and I almost collapsed. I had left while Anthony was in the shower, wanting to be able to tell him that I made it to the nursing station and back while he was showering. However, the nurse had to wheel me back to my room and help me back into the bed. Anthony had heard the commotion and come out of the shower with only a towel wrapped around his waist. Fuck me he’s damn right sexy. He isn’t happy that I went without him.