There’s a feeling I get when I’m excited – I wonder if you’ve ever had it?
It’s like an electric current rushing up my back, and when it reaches my head it makes my face go hot, and it feels as if my hair is standing on end. It only happens when I’m really excited, and it happened the very moment I heard about Sita, Snake-Queen of Speed.
Even the name thrilled me through and through, but there was more. For Sita, Snake-Queen of Speed had a Thrill Ride the likes of which I’d never dreamt about, not even in my wildest dreams.
It was my best friend Kylie Teasdale who told me about it, and, even before she’d finished telling me, I knew I had to see Sita for myself. Not just see her. I knew I had to ride with her on the Thrill Ride to end all Thrill Rides.
That was tricky though, because Sita, Snake-Queen of Speed was one of the rides at Thrill City. And unfortunately, Thrill City is not the kind of place my family (that’s Mum, and Dad, and Nani, and Bilal, my baby brother) would ever go for a holiday.
Bradford – yes. Thrill City – no.
Anyway, Kylie told me about Sita and her amazing Snake Ride after she came back from Thrill City in the Spring Holidays. She talked about nothing else for four entire days.
“It’s fabulous, Yosser,” she said, as we waited for the morning bell to ring. “Utterly, mind-blowingly, fabulous.”
By the way, Kylie says she gets the electric-current thing up her back too, and her hair feels like it’s standing on end. And since Kylie’s mum lets her get her hair streaked yellow and orange and red, it’s a real shame that it doesn’t really stand on end – because how cool would that be!
Kylie’s mum also let Kylie get her tummy button pierced. I once asked my mum if I could get my tummy button pierced and she said – ‘Not while I have breath in my body and blood in my veins’. Which is her way of saying no.
Kylie’s great at describing things. She uses such good words that she makes pictures appear in your mind. One day she’s going to be a famous writer, but for the time being she’s practising on me.
So I shut my eyes and listened to Kylie telling me about Sita, Snake-Queen of Speed, and the more she told me, the more I pictured her. And the more I pictured her, the more I knew I had to go to Thrill City.
“You get strapped into this thing called a Snake Pod,” Kylie explained. “The outside’s painted to look like snakeskin, and the front is a snake’s head.
“Even the seats are snakeskin,” she went on, “and the bit you hold on to is…” Kylie paused and took a big breath, “… a blood-stained fang.”
I shivered. I wanted to ask Kylie if the fang was actually wet and sticky with blood. I didn’t though, because I knew deep down they wouldn’t be allowed real blood; in fact, they probably wouldn’t be allowed even wet and sticky fake blood.
“Right ahead of you,” Kylie went on, “there’s this huge model of Sita, and you have never in your life seen anyone so cooool. She’s got green snakeskin boots, and green snakeskin gloves, and round her neck she has a little golden snake. Her eyes are yellow, and her hair is long and black and…” Kylie clutched my arm hard, “… there are snakes writhing about in it!”
“Oh my goodness!” I breathed. “But not really writhing?”
I couldn’t believe they’d really writhe – like, actually move back and forth and from side to side.
Kylie was nodding though. “The model’s a kind of Virtual Reality computer thing,” she said, “so Sita walks about…”
“… and the snakes writhe?” I said, just to make quite sure.
Kylie nodded. “Writhe like anything! Sometimes, a snake’ll writhe down towards you and open its jaws, so you can see its forked tongue and its fangs.”
“Does deadly venom drip from the fangs, Kylie?” I asked.
I know quite a lot about snakes, you see, because I’ve got snakes at home, though they’re not alive. They belong to my nani and they’re stuffed, like a lot of Nani’s things. She’s got a huge collection, mostly birds and lizards, which she keeps in her bedroom.
Nani knows all about snakes, which is how I know that snakes’ fangs are hollow, and they inject deadly venom through them into their prey.
“Deadly venom and blood, Yosser,” nodded Kylie. “It’s awesome.”
She didn’t have to tell me. I had the clearest picture of Sita, Snake-Queen of Speed inside my head.
And it had awesome written all over it.