RACHEL SAT ON the toilet in Felix’s apartment as Felix pleaded through the door. “Why don’t you want to do this?”
“Why do you think?” Rachel said, peeing.
“Because of—”
“Yes, because of—what the hell else? Because of—”
“But that’s why we should do it.”
Rachel heard him slump against the door. “I’ll help you,” he pressed. “I know it’s still raw—”
“You don’t have to tell me.”
“I know. But all of that is the very reason you should do it.”
“I know,” Rachel shouted, her patience frayed. “I know! OK!” She dabbed herself with toilet paper and tugged up her panties and jeans. She took the crumpled list from her pocket. The girl’s photo. Considered them. Felix had a point. As if what they’d been through the last two weeks hadn’t been traumatic enough, the protestors outside Family Matters had made it worse. Monsters. Her father had never been able to slip a lie past her. He’d visited because he’d been worried about her, and she’d caught him off guard; so he’d offered a way to bond, but had no intention of ever letting her actually do it. She knew that. She’d seen the relief on his face when she’d said no. But. Felix was right, what better reason to investigate than what had happened?
“Well?” Felix said, breaking the silence.
Rachel opened the bathroom door. “OK.”