“What were you thinking, Madison?”
Madison had been looking out the window. She’d spent most of her life in the city, where artificial lights bloomed from every corner. It had been near impossible to see the stars. But here, in the middle of the country, where towers didn’t rival the skyline, she could see every single star.
Her father had brought her out to Montana a couple of times. Normally it had been on a training exercise. He’d plant her in a hotel or on the base. Madison spent her days watching the wildlife roam free. She would lay on her back at night and look up and lose count of the stars.
Those bright orbs twinkled at her now. They tried to coax a smile out of her. They almost caught one. Until Doug interrupted her thoughts.
“You could lose everything. And for what? Him?”
Madison turned away from the window to face off against Doug. They were inside Chief Pena’s office. The chief sat behind his desk, his fingers steepled, not looking at either of them. Doug stood near the door with his hands clenched, his cheeks red.
Madison was standing, as well. She doubted she’d be in the room long enough to get comfortable in the chair. Chief Pena’s silence unsettled her, making her want to pace.
She took a step away from the chief’s desk and toward Doug. She didn’t teeter in her heels. She stood tall. She stood a half of an inch over him. But somehow she felt even taller.
“My love life is none of your business,” she said.
“Love?”
The word was a gust of wind between them both. Madison realized she’d never once considered marrying this man. Had they ever exchanged the L-word between them. It had never occurred to her to love Doug. She wondered if she ever could have?
It didn’t matter anymore. Her heart was thudding more over Paul’s surgery. That was the only thing that mattered; Paul needed to have that surgery.
Madison turned away from Doug and back to the chief. “You can’t take me off this case.”
Chief Pena didn’t look angry. He didn’t even look irritated or censorious. He looked thoughtful.
“I’m the best orthopedic surgeon you’ve got.”
“Excuse me!” interjected Doug.
“All three of us know it,” Madison continued, ignoring her ex.
Chief Pena placed his hands flat on his desk. His chin raised, and he nodded at her pronouncement. Madison felt a wellspring of relief.
“Are you telling me there’s nothing between you and Major Hanson?” Chief Pena asked.
That wellspring of relief dried up in an instant. Madison opened her mouth to try and deny her feelings for Paul. A tidal wave of warmth rushed in to fill the spaces left behind.
“It’s just harmless flirting,” she tried.
“I haven’t kissed any of my patients this week,” said Chief Pena.
Doug exploded off the wall he’d been leaning against. “You kissed him?”
Madison ignored Doug. She was trying not to remember that kiss she’d shared with Paul. Her lips still tingled from that impact. She couldn’t deny that’s why she was fighting so hard to stay on this case. She needed to ensure the care of every single one of Paul’s nerves. A man who could make her hair follicles tingle with just a brush of his lips needed special care.
“Would you have me believe you have no feelings for him, Madison?” asked Chief Pena. “Nothing outside of the normal care for a patient?”
Madison had to swallow a few times to tamp down the feelings that wanted to burst out of her. “I… he…”
With each word she spoke, she had to swallow again. She had to swallow hard because of the emotions bubbling inside her chest. Madison knew she had to quiet it down so that she could speak. It wasn’t just Paul’s life on the line here. It was her life, too.
She looked at the scalpel in a case on Pena’s desk. Her hands itched to reach for it. She could remember the feel of the first scalpel she’d held. She’d picked up the instrument and felt a certainty. Her fingers never twitched when she held a scalpel because she was sure.
She remembered her hand inside Paul’s. He’d given her fingers a squeeze. She’d felt the overwhelming urge to lace their hands together. It was the first time she’d felt so certain outside of an OR.
Madison looked up at the chief. He smiled knowingly at her. She sighed in defeat. Then she turned to Doug.
“Doug, if you ever cared anything for me, I need you now.”