Chapter Fifteen

Back home in her bungalow Sunday night, Mel’s hand trembled as she picked up her cell phone and hit the speed dial button for Adam. Those three little words had tumbled out last night before she could stop them. I love you, Adam. He’d had no reaction at all to them. No response. Now they hung in the air between them like a live grenade, waiting to explode.

“Hello?” He answered on the second ring, his deep voice vibrating through her body like a tuning fork, despite the edge of coldness in his tone. Waldo meowed loudly from the floor, demanding attention after being left alone all weekend, snapping her out of her daze.

She swallowed around the anxiety constricting her throat. “Hey.”

A pause. “What’s wrong? Why are you calling?”

Mel pushed away from the wall where she’d been leaning. “I just wanted to see how you were doing. After last night. With James coming home in a few days and things changing. We didn’t really get a chance to talk about any of that on the way home earlier.”

“I’m fine.” His rough voice held a hint of sadness. “Deadline’s up. It’s all good.”

Good? She blinked back the sting of tears, pressing her hand against her chest, trying to hold back the impending heartache. She might be inexperienced when it came to love, but she was well versed in rejection. Adam had been clear from the start that he didn’t want more. It was stupid for her to be upset now.

So, so stupid.

“Right. Sure. Deadline’s here. That’s what we agreed upon, right?” she said, her words echoing in her head, the confirmation of failure settling in at last. She wasn’t what he wanted; she wasn’t enough for him. Her knees wobbled, and Waldo scurried out of her path, his nails scratching on the hardwood floor. She made a beeline for the sofa in her living room, the phone still to her ear, doing her best to keep the pain slicing through her from emerging in her tone.

God, I’m such a fool. A stupid, stupid fool.

“Thanks for helping me out,” she said, hating the telltale catch in her voice. “I was kidding, you know. About telling you I loved you last night. Doing a last bit of practice is all.”

Saying those words flayed her, but she had to stem the tide of hurt, or else she might just drown in her own misery.

The only way to lead an authentic, fulfilled life is to take risks. Battle those doubt demons. Your reward could be unexpected and beyond your wildest dreams.

She planned to burn that stupid Cosmo issue at the first opportunity.

“I knew that.” Adam sounded odd now, gruffer. Probably because she’d brought the L-word up again. Like an idiot. “Don’t worry about it. No big deal.”

Mel gave a hollow laugh, melancholy searing her veins. It was a big deal. At least it had been to her. Time to get off this damned phone before she was begging him to stay in her life, before she couldn’t let him go. She had to let him go. It’s what he wanted, what he’d always wanted.

You’re on your own with the love part. I don’t do love.

It had been right there in front of her face the whole time, and she’d chosen to ignore it. No wonder she was still alone. No one wanted to be with a silly spinster who couldn’t even take the most blatant of hints. No wonder she wasn’t enough. She inhaled deep and forced a cheerful tone she definitely didn’t feel. “Guess I’m good to go from here on out then. A dating dynamo. Flirt expert.”

She lay back on the sofa, tears flowing now as everything crumbled around her.

“Yeah, you’re definitely good, Mel. Way too good for me.” His taut words ran together, as if he couldn’t wait to end this uncomfortable conversation. “Listen, I should go. I’ve got a bunch of stuff to catch up on at the garage. I’m picking James up from the airport on Friday, but I doubt I’ll see you then. It was fun, Mel.”

Her breath caught, her rib cage aching. Fun. It had been so much more than that to her. Their time together, all the things she’d experienced with Adam, because of Adam. But he’d only been doing her a favor. He’d been having fun. The finality of that gradually seeped into her. She spoke before she could stop herself. “You could still come. To the party. On Saturday.”

Stupid Mel. So stupid.

Why the hell would he want to come to her party? He probably had a hot date with the next garage groupie on his list. Adam didn’t do relationships, and he obviously didn’t do lovelorn losers like her, either, unless he was forced into a deal. The signs had all been there. If she’d been wiser, more of a player like Adam, she’d have ended it before the wedding.

But Mel wasn’t a player, never had been.

That was the problem all along.

He’d warned her. James had warned her. Hell, even Lilly had warned her.

She had no one to blame but herself.

Seducing her bad boy had been an utter failure because Mel had ended up losing her heart in the process. She’d been the one seduced, the one who’d lost it all.

Her spirits plummeted, even before he answered.

“Nah,” Adam said. “Best to end it clean and go our separate ways.”

“You’re the expert.” Clearing her throat, Mel sat up and brushed away her silly tears. She was stronger than this, darn it. They’d had a couple of amazing weeks together, but it was over.

Period. The end.

She sniffled before she could catch herself.

“Aw, dammit.” Adam’s tone shifted to concern. “Please, Mel, don’t cry. You deserve so much better than me. I’m not the guy for you. I never was.”

“I know,” she lied, swiping a hand across her damp cheeks. “I’m fine. Really. Our deal’s over. Bargain fulfilled. Well done. I’ll talk to you later,” she said, needing to get off the phone before she broke down completely. “See you around.”

“Mel…” Adam’s voice trailed off, and she ended the call.

What was there left to say? Nothing.

They’d go back to the way they’d been before, forget the rest.

No matter how impossible that seemed.

…

Friday night, Adam swiped his hand across his sweaty forehead, then pulled at the crew neck of his T-shirt that suddenly seemed ready to strangle him. He should’ve called off sick and let the rest of the gang at Victory Vets pick up James, but that would’ve been a coward move, and Adam wasn’t a coward. Not about most things, anyway. Besides, he and James had issues to discuss. Except, as he looked around the Tipsy Wench, all he could picture was the last time he’d been here, with Mel.

He wanted to see her again. So badly it hurt.

But sitting with the guys from the garage—who’d been drinking more than their fair share—all Adam wanted to do was go home. James was watching him from across the table, looking pissed off enough already, and he didn’t even know the full story.

Jag raised his bottle of ale in a toast, breaking Adam out of his thoughts. “To one hell of a guy and his great-looking sister. Not that I’m looking or anything.”

Adam released his death grip on his bottle of water and forced himself to breathe. Jag was a nice enough guy, but his reputation around town was almost as bad as Adam’s. The thought that he’d noticed Mel’s recent transformation and might harbor romantic ideas about her made Adam’s blood boil.

“Maybe one of these days, I might take her to lunch or something.” Jag hailed a passing server and ordered another ale, either not realizing or not caring about the dangerous waters he was treading. “If you don’t mind, James.”

James’s unblinking gaze never left Adam. The only sign he’d heard Jag at all was the muscle ticking near his tight jaw. “She won’t be interested. She’s already seeing someone.”

“That girl’s too good for the likes of you anyway,” Hollywood chimed in. “I bet you twenty bucks if you asked her out she’d turn you down flat.”

Adam exhaled slowly, staring at the tabletop, the weight of James’s gaze heavy on shoulders. Man, he could’ve really used a beer about now. But he’d been elected designated driver tonight, which was fine with him, since the last thing he needed was to get boozed up and get into a brawl with James over what had happened between him and Mel. They had enough problems to work out as it was, without liquor involved.

“Maybe you should try someone a little better suited, Jag,” Adam said at last, to fill the stifling silence at the table, giving a pointed look at Hollywood.

“Fine idea, coming from you.” James all but spat the words.

A hush fell over their group.

True enough. If Adam had followed his own advice, maybe he wouldn’t have been in the mess he was now. He’d face it all though, all the crap, everything, if it meant protecting Mel.

“I need another water.” Adam pushed to his feet and headed toward the bar, the air around him stinking of old booze and sweaty bodies. “Be back.”

He didn’t make it five steps before James cut him off, grabbing his arm. “Hold up.”

They faced each other over a span of about a foot, the air between them thick with tension.

Adam shook off his grip. “Let’s do this outside, okay?”

“No. I think we’ll do this right here.” James scowled. “What exactly are your intentions toward my sister?”

Adam opened his mouth, closed it again. “I don’t have any. It’s over between us.”

He attempted to shove past James, but it was like trying to move Mount Everest. The guy had a good three inches’ height and fifty pounds of muscle on him.

“Mel is not some plaything,” James growled, his scowl dark enough to eclipse the sun. “She needs a guy who’ll be there for her. Not one who’s out running around with a different bimbo every night. Understand?”

Frustration and pain sparked through Adam’s blood like a fuse, threatening to blow. James wasn’t some saint, either. Screw him and his sanctimonious bull. They’d been friends so long the guy knew every button to push, and damn if he wasn’t leaning on all of them right now. “I said it’s over. Drop it, before I drop you on your ass.”

The bartender who’d come over to help them backed away slowly, as the other patrons around them gave them space as well.

“That a threat, dude?” James snarled. “Stay away from my sister. You think I didn’t notice the way your expression got all sappy when her name came up. Or the death glare you gave Jag when he mentioned taking her to lunch. If that isn’t jealousy, I don’t know what is.”

“I’m not jealous.”

“Like hell you’re not.”

They stood nose to nose now, neither one giving an inch.

“Mel’s a one-man woman, and you couldn’t stick with one gal if your privates depended on it.” James raised a finger and poked Adam hard in the chest. “Leave. Her. Alone.”

Maybe it was the fact that every eye in the bar was watching him. Maybe it was the fact that his feelings were coiled tighter than a cobra. Maybe it was the fact that he missed Mel so bad he thought he might die of it. Whatever it was, it pushed Adam over the line. He needed a different kind of pain to distract him from the agony of his broken heart. Teeth gritted, he narrowed his gaze on his former best friend. “And if I don’t?”

James’s nostrils flared with challenge. “If you don’t, then I’ll kick your ass. And you can forget about our partnership in Victory Vets, too. I’ll either buy you out or pull my funds and start my own garage and run yours into the dirt.” The flinty look in his gray eyes said he meant every word. “Got me?”

Adam shoved James back a step. “Oh, I got you, all right. I was never more than a charity case for you anyway, was I? Take in the poor kid and let him see everything he’s missing, all the stuff he could never have. Well, I got news for you, dude. Whatever happened with Mel is none of your business. If she wants me to leave her alone, then I will. Until then, why don’t you f—”

James’s fist collided with the side of Adam’s face with concussive force, knocking him back about two feet. He stumbled, managed to right himself before rushing back toward his best friend and landing a right hook across James’s jaw. The next few seconds passed in a blur. Fighting with James was an idiot move. Aside from being bigger than Adam, his best friend had also trained to be a boxer while they’d been stationed near Kabul. All it took was one left hook, followed by a crushing right cross, and Adam was down on the floor, staring up at the ceiling of the bar, wishing like hell he hadn’t provoked James, yet knowing he deserved every blow.

James stood panting nearby, rubbing his jaw where Adam had decked him and shaking his head. “I mean it, man. Stay away from Mel. You don’t deserve her.”

Adam struggled to his feet, with Jag’s help, swiping away blood on his chin from his split lip. “You don’t think I know that? Hell, it was foremost in my mind every single day we were together. I know I’m not good enough. I never was. But you were wrong about me seeing her as a plaything. She was never disposable. Not to me. You think I would’ve risked everything, our friendship, our business partnership, on a fling?” He gave a sad snort and staggered backward, away from James. “I risked it all because I cared about her. I would have given it all up, everything, even Victory Vets, for Mel. But it doesn’t matter now, because she’s gone. We’re over. I lost everything that mattered. You think beating me up will help? Go ahead. I don’t deserve better anyway, right?”

James frowned. “You betrayed me.”

“Yeah? Well, you betrayed me, too.” Adam turned fast, his head swimming as tossed the rental car keys to the bartender, then stormed for the door. “I’m outta here. Hold on to those until one of them is sober enough to drive or until tomorrow. I don’t care. I’ll find my own way back to Point Beacon.”