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When we arrived at Ivan’s house, we found him dozing in a chair in his front garden. His hands were clasped over his stomach and he had a happy smile on his face.
Stanley said, “He doesn’t look like a murderer.”
“They never do.”
I opened the gate and we walked over to the sleeping gnome. I gave a polite cough and Ivan’s eyes opened.
“Hello again,” he said. “Twice in one day? I am lucky.” He looked upwards. “Isn’t this a beautiful day? I’ve never seen the sky so blue or the clouds so white and fluffy. Yes, it’s a truly beautiful day. A good day to be alive.” He chuckled to himself.
Stanley whispered, “Is he drunk?”
I whispered back, “I don’t know. He sounds it. Go and check.”
Stanley padded over to Ivan and surreptitiously sniffed him. Ivan was blissfully unaware as he gazed up at the sky and hummed to himself.
Stanley came back to me and said, “I can’t smell alcohol, but I can smell something else that I can’t identify. It smells sour.”
I moved closer to Ivan and said, “When we spoke to you earlier, you said you used to live in another town. Where was that?”
“Dingy Skipper,” Ivan announced cheerfully. “Awful place. Awful creatures too. I was glad to see the back of it. Brimstone is much more picturesque. I love living here. I’m such a lucky fellow. A very lucky fellow.”
“Why did you leave Dingy Skipper?” I asked.
“Because of the fishing I was expected to do. I’d had enough of that. I couldn’t bear to look at another fish. Slimy-looking things they are. I’d had my eye on moving to Brimstone for a long time. A friend helped me get this house.” His smile turned crafty. “My friend was good at persuading those in charge to do the right thing.”
“Oh? What’s your friend’s name?”
“Alan. He was a nice chap, good at his job.” Ivan chuckled. “He did a job for me, actually. His last job.” Ivan raised a finger to his lips. “Alan charged for his services, but I didn’t pay his fee. Don’t tell anyone. I played a bit of a trick on him and got out of paying. That doesn’t matter now. Alan doesn’t need money anymore.”
Stanley came closer to my side and said quietly, “Is he admitting to killing Alan?”
“I’m not sure yet.” I forced a smile on my face. “I’d love to know more about the trick you played on Alan.”
“Of course you would,” Ivan said joyfully. “I’m a very clever fellow, despite what the other gnomes say about me. I met Alan in Dingy Skipper when I lived there. Alan loved fishing for some unknown reason. He used to watch me from the riverbank and he asked me one annoying question after another. One day, to shut him up, I let him use my equipment. Gnome fishing rods have a touch of magic in them and the fish are drawn to them easily. We’re not supposed to lend anyone our fishing rods, but I didn’t care. Don’t tell anyone.” He attempted to tap the side of his nose but he missed. “Alan loved using the fishing rod and kept coming back to see me at the river. I told him how I wanted to move away from Dingy Skipper and to Brimstone. He knew that this house was available and said he would get it for me if I gave him all my fishing tackle. I said yes straight away.” He chuckled. “Fishing gnomes are not supposed to give anyone their fishing tackle. It’s against gnome law. But I didn’t care.”
“You said Alan did a job for you. What was that?”
Ivan stared upwards again. “Isn’t the sky beautiful? Such a lovely blue. And the clouds! I’ve never seen them so fluffy and white. I’m such a lucky fellow. It’s a great day to be alive.”
“The job?” I gently reminded him.
“Ah, yes. I wanted Alan to get rid of that annoying centaur who was galloping through here. He was such a pest! He was ruining my peace and quiet. It was bad enough that he was racing around here every night, but then I had to put up with all the rude remarks from my neighbours the day after. They said I’d caused all the damage! It was spoiling my happiness. I’d moved here so I could be at peace with everyone.” He shook his head. “No, that centaur had to go. I got in touch with Alan and he said he’d put me at the top of his list. But he wanted me to pay him; he said he couldn’t do it as a favour.” His eyes started to close.
I prodded him on the arm. “What was the price?”
Ivan’s eyes opened and he sniggered. “I lied to Alan. I told him I had a huge supply of magic fishing rods and I’d pay him with those. I said he’d make a fortune selling those rods. That made him happy and he said he’d get on with the job immediately. He didn’t even want a payment in advance, which was lucky because I couldn’t pay him.” He burst into laughter. “I couldn’t pay him because I didn’t have any magic rods. Ha!”
Stanley’s nose twitched. “That sour smell is getting stronger. I can smell it coming from somewhere else too. Let me investigate.” He went to the side of the garden and cautiously sniffed the dead plants.
Ivan started humming to himself again. He tapped his fingers on his stomach. “Isn’t this a beautiful day? Look at the sky. I’ve never seen – ”
I abruptly cut him off. “You asked Alan to kill Selo. Is that right?”
“Yes. I told you Selo was a pest. An annoying pest that had to go. Alan followed Selo for a few days and found out where he ran. It didn’t take Alan long to complete his job.” Ivan let out a sigh. “It’s been so peaceful without that noisy centaur.”
Stanley silently padded past me and headed towards the back garden.
I asked, “Do you know what an Aitvaras is?”
“A what? What’s one of those?”
“A shapeshifting dragon,” I explained. “They turn into black cats.”
“Do they really? How fascinating. What are they called again?”
I studied the look on his face. He looked like he was telling the truth.
“Never mind,” I said. “Why did you kill Alan?”
“Because I couldn’t pay him.” Ivan chuckled. “It was so funny. Alan came here looking for those magic fishing rods. He looked so happy and went on and on about the fishing he was going to do. I didn’t tell him about the trick I’d played on him. I couldn’t. I knew how angry he’d be. So, I made him a cup of tea instead. It was a special cup of tea and it made Alan forget about the fishing rods. I am such a clever fellow. I really am.”
“Did you use the Screaming Devil’s Fungus that’s growing in your back garden?”
Ivan gave me an impressed look. “Well spotted. I might not be good at growing roses, but I’m excellent at growing that fungus. I brought some with me from Dingy Skipper. It grows wild there. You never know when you might need to use a bit of poison on someone.” He winked at me. “Help yourself to some. Wear gloves, though. It’s powerful stuff.”
“Did Alan know you’d poisoned him before he died?”
“Oh, yes,” Ivan said with more than a hint of amusement in his voice. “You should have seen the shock on his face. It made my day. As the poison took effect, he asked who was in charge in this town. I told him about Blythe and where she lived. He said he was going to tell her about me and the job he’d done for me. I wished him luck and opened the front door for him. I knew he wouldn’t get far as the poison works quickly. I heard you found him on Blythe’s path. He got further than I thought he would.”
Stanley came running over to me and said, “The sour smell is coming from that Screaming Devil’s Fungus in the back.”
Ivan had his eyes closed again. His voice was slow as he said, “This is such a beautiful day to be alive. I’m glad I picked this as my last day to be alive.” His breathing became shallow, and the colour drained from his face.
Stanley cried out, “He’s poisoned himself! He’s dying!”
“No! I won’t allow it.” I raised my hands at the gnome and forced magic into my fingers.
Nothing happened.
I tried again.
“Stanley, I can’t make my magic work!”
Stanley waved his paw at the dead plants. “These could have come from Dingy Skipper too. They could be blocking your magic. What are we going to do? We can’t let him die.”
I lowered my hands and stared helplessly at the gnome. His life force was seeping away, and there was nothing I could do to stop it.
