Lucy set her palms down flat on her desk. She couldn’t breathe, her chest tightened. Before she even had the chance to hear what Mark knew about Patrick’s arrest, he had other news to share. She listened through the headset as Mark explained the limited details they had on the Vicki Wilkinson assault. Lucy again relayed the conversation she’d had with Mick and Vicki on the day of the attack. Mark advised Lucy that they may need to speak with her further pending enquiries.
Lucy was shaking as she hung up the telephone. Sarah must have spotted she was upset and came over.
‘Hey, are you OK? You look a bit shaken up.’
In a daze, Lucy hoped that Sarah couldn’t see how uneasy she felt.
‘What is it, Lucy? Do you want a cuppa?’
Lucy shook her head. ‘No … no, I’ll be fine. I’ve just got some news about Vicki Wilkinson and now I’m worried that I should’ve seen this coming.’
‘Oh, my god, has something happened to Vicki? What? Why didn’t they contact me?’
‘According to the police, Vicki has been attacked. Apparently, it’s pretty bad – she’s in a coma. I guess they let me know because I emailed them about that home visit.’
Sarah gasped and squeezed Lucy’s shoulder. ‘Oh no! Did they arrest anyone?’
‘No, but I think Mick O’Dowd might be involved. Remember, I’d spoken to them, and I warned Vicki to be careful. I warned her. What if my threat triggered him off?’
‘You can’t think like that. If Mick was involved, he made the decision on his own. And no matter how vulnerable Vicki is, she is also capable of making her own choices. You can’t blame yourself for any of this.’
Lucy knew Sarah was right. It still didn’t stop her from feeling guilty. At least Sarah understood, but it was everyone else she was worried about. People outside of probation didn’t get the stressful decisions they had to make. Without really knowing what the job entailed, assumptions from others often caused good officers to lose confidence in their abilities.
Lucy thanked Sarah and composed herself. She needed to update her records and then speak to her line manager. This would no doubt end up as a serious further offence investigation. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!
After informing her manager of the situation and being reassured that her decisions were defensible, Lucy was desperate to call Mark again, to see if there were any further updates on the case. She hesitated, her hand above the phone. What would calling Mark achieve? He might grow suspicious and start asking questions that she was not ready or prepared to answer. She shook the idea out of her head, logged off her computer, and locked away her paperwork. When she was feeling like this, she didn’t want to go home.