Outside, Rory gave Emma a nervous smile. He wasn’t sure why he said that to Lucy. Even if she did change her mind, he doubted anyone would believe that he killed his own father.
A tinge of guilt coursed through him and his smile faded. On the surface of it, he had no reason to kill him; he hadn’t known his father long, almost a year. What motive could he possibly have? He began to feel a bit more confident. It’ll be OK.
Rory knew he was nothing like his father. He’d listened to Patrick belittle Lucy. Had flashbacks to his childhood, hearing those same things said to his own mother. No fouryearold should hear that. He must have pushed the memories into his subconscious, but meeting his father made him relive them all on a daily basis. He should’ve spoken to someone.
After seeing Lucy limp up the stairs, he knew he couldn’t let his dad get away with it. His mother never deserved what happened to her and Lucy didn’t either. He wouldn’t let his sister fall into the hands of abusive men, and he’d be damned if he’d let Patrick scare his sister any longer. Lucy thought she was hiding it from Rory and Siobhan, but they knew … they always knew.
He looked over at Emma and squeezed her hand. She smiled at him warily and that’s when it dawned on him. ‘I’m not like him you know …’
‘Who?’
‘My dad. I’m not like him.’
Emma couldn’t meet his eye.
‘What happened, your arm – that was an accident. I didn’t mean it. You know I love you, right?’
‘I know.’ She looked away again.
Rory stopped walking and turned Emma to face him. ‘Look me in the eyes. Please?’ She did. It was then that Rory saw it: the fear. She was scared of him. What have I done? What am I becoming?
‘I’m sorry … I’m so, sorry.’
She remained quiet. And in the silence, Rory knew he needed to get help. He thought that once his dad was gone, everything would be OK. It wasn’t though. He couldn’t let Lucy take the blame for his actions. It would mean his life would be over – but maybe he’d save someone else from suffering the way his mother did.
The way Lucy did.
He couldn’t believe he’d even let it get this far.
‘I need to do something, Emma. You’ll see.’