Chapter Eleven

Where the hell was she? Abby looked around and blinked, taking a minute to recognize the guest room in Stephan and Jo’s house. The reminders of the night before came flooding back to her, memories of the intimacy and, holy shit, the sex, all of that feeling more like something another person would have experienced than something she really did. Her body was sore, but the good kind of sore, the “I just got fucked” kind of sore. She was smiling, too, and couldn’t stop smiling.

Next to her, Sam stirred, sliding an arm around her and drawing her closer as he blinked awake. He smiled sleepily. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Damn, he was handsome. He had this lazy sleepiness about him, the groggy look of one just waking up but completely sated. Her heart felt like it might be too big for her chest. So much for her fears of the morning after. The morning after felt pretty good right now.

“I’m starving. You starving?” He propped himself up on his elbow and looked around, then fumbled for his phone on the nightstand. “Wow, it’s almost eleven.”

“What? Really?” Abby sat up. She never slept naked, but without having packed an overnight bag for this trip, it had seemed like the most natural option. She checked her own phone, which wasn’t quite dead, even after having not been charged overnight. Sure enough, it was ten fifty in the morning. “Jesus. We never sleep this late.”

“Well, we stayed up pretty late.” Sam rubbed sleep from his eyes.

A knock at the door made them both turn. Abby’s first instinct was to cover herself, but the ship had kind of sailed on that, hadn’t it? “Come in. But we’re naked.”

Jo was laughing as she opened the door. “I appreciate the warning. We were thinking about grabbing brunch. You want to come with? You can also stay here and sleep if you want.”

As if in answer, Sam’s stomach gave a loud gurgle, and he looked down at it. “I think that answers that.”

“Great. Oh, also.” Jo disappeared from the door, then returned a moment later with a pile of clothes. “I washed your clothes.”

“What? When? You didn’t have to do that.” Abby took the pile from Jo, still warm from the dryer.

“I got up early, thought you might not want clothes with sex all over them.” She smiled broadly, then laughed. “You look stricken.”

Yeah, Abby probably was making that horrified face, and she let it go and laughed as well. “Sorry. I’m just not usually so blunt about talking about this stuff.”

“I think once you’ve seen somebody’s bits, you’ve got to be a little more blunt.” Jo flopped the clothes down onto the bed and then backed away. “You want to shower?”

Abby looked over at Sam, whose stomach gurgled again. “Nah. We’re starved. Let’s just go eat.”

In the car, following Jo and Stephan as they headed to Sylvester’s for brunch, Abby kept glancing over at Sam in the passenger seat. His hands folded in his lap, he wore a slight frown on his face that seemed more thoughtful than upset.

“What?” she asked after a little while of silence. “You okay?”

Sam made a little “Hmm” noise and then shrugged. “I don’t know. I think so. I keep expecting to feel different, but I just don’t.”

“Yeah.” Abby was having that same sense. It was jarring, the way normalcy seemed imbued in this morning that should have felt not-normal at all.

There wasn’t time to talk further, though, because they were already parking. Sam took her hand as they walked up to the entrance, the cold biting into Abby’s skin and reminding her that winter was not over by a long shot. For now, though, she felt warm inside.

…

They sidled into a booth in the corner, couples on each side facing each other, and Sam reached over to give Abby’s thigh a squeeze. She had been hard to read this morning. Although she was all smiles, she had this odd look about her. Maybe she was going through the same questioning that he was.

“We come here all the time.” Jo didn’t even open her menu, keeping it flat on the table in front of her. “It’s our favorite brunch spot.”

“We love this place, too.” Sam scanned the options, as he always did. “I try to vary it up a little, though. I never want to stick with the same meal every time we come.”

“Well, variety is the spice of life, right?”

Jo’s comment sounded cheeky, and when Sam peered over his menu, both she and Stephan were grinning like they’d collectively come up with the best and worst double entendre. Next to him, Abby chortled.

“You know, I don’t know if I’m going to be able to get used to this direct conversation thing.” She looked over at Sam.

“That wasn’t very direct,” Jo corrected. “It was actually just barely a hint.”

Stephan snorted. “Yeah, if she wants to be direct, she’ll just ask you if you had a good time fucking Sam and me last night.”

“Jesus.” Abby looked around. “Guys. We’re at brunch. It’s the least sexual meal of the day.”

“Maybe the way you do brunch, it is.” Jo raised an eyebrow. “But brunch for us is usually our favorite thing to do after partner swapping or going out on separate dates. It’s like, hey, let’s all check in. So.” She folded her hands. “Let’s check in.”

The waiter came over just then, because of course he would. When he finally left, Abby let out a long breath, slowly exhaling while she presumably gathered her thoughts. “I had fun last night. I’m glad we did it.” She glanced at Sam. “I wouldn’t be opposed to doing it again. And…the rest, I think Sam and I have to debrief together.”

“Of course.” Stephan nodded. “For what it’s worth, Abby, Sam, last night was awesome for me. I had a really amazing time. If you’re ever down for that again, I’m here. Whether it’s all of us, or just me and you two, or”—he looked at Abby—“just me and you, give me a call.”

“Right. Thanks.” She smiled, and it looked genuine. “Sam? What do you think?”

Multiple emotions ran through him in quick succession, but one persisted through all of them. “I think that last night is something to remember.” He looked at all of them. “And to do again.”

Jo smiled. “That sounds good to me.” She folded her hands on the table. “Now, have you guys seen any good movies lately?”

…

Home felt weird. Well…not weird, exactly. Abby looked around as Sam followed her inside, shutting the door behind them. Home felt exactly the same, and she felt different. Not only well-fucked, but also psychologically different. And maybe it was silly to put such emphasis on sex, because it was just sex, but this seemed like a new step forward.

“Let’s talk about this.” She rounded on Sam even as he was just hanging up his coat by the door, and he gave her the wide-eyed expression of surprise.

“About last night? Now?” He swallowed visibly, then gave a nod-shrug. “Okay, yeah. So. I know you weren’t necessarily thrilled about having another woman there.”

“That was surprisingly not a big deal.” She hadn’t felt weird about Jo at all, except that it was unusual. “I don’t want to fuck her.”

“No.” Sam smiled, and the warmth in his smile made her heart feel a little bigger. “And, to be clear, I don’t want to fuck her, either.”

“Okay.” After wandering over to the couch, she sat down, drawing her leg underneath her. Sam sat beside her on the sofa. “I think in time, I might be okay with you dating someone other than me,” she told him. “But I don’t think I’m there just yet.”

“I don’t need you to be okay with that, ever.” Sam reached out for her, taking one of her hands. His thumb grazed the back of her knuckles, soothing her. “I’m not looking for that. What Stephan and Jo have, it’s hot, and it’s great for them, but I’m not looking for it for me.”

“And if someday you are?” It was possible, after all. These things changed and evolved.

“Then I’ll talk to you. And we’ll decide together what’s right for us.” He gave her a reassuring nod. “But that isn’t what I really want to talk about.”

“Oh?” What was there to talk about, if not sleeping with other people?

“We didn’t really talk about what this might mean for us long-term.” He stroked her thigh, once, and then took his hand back. “I like this. I like what we’ve been doing. I like what’s happened to our sex life, and I really like watching you be this lusty woman you’ve been hiding all this time.”

Abby rolled her eyes, but she also smiled.

“I want to know how you feel,” he said.

That was the biggest question. She’d put this part of herself aside, and it felt weird to reconcile it with the way she was now. But she definitely didn’t want to go back. “I want to keep going with this. With Stephan and Jo, and…probably Zach, and…I don’t know. Other people. And I want the kink sometimes, and the playfulness, and maybe whatever weird-ass fantasies you’ve got kicking around in there.”

Sam grinned. “You’re okay with that? You don’t think it’s the kiss of death for our relationship anymore?”

“I guess I overreacted a little bit.” She interlaced her fingers with his. Nothing was going to replace Sam, who was so deeply a part of her life that she would never want to separate them. But sex was different. Sex could be fun and not be the end of the world. They could be adventurous together, and with other people, and their relationship could maybe end up even better than before.

What was there not to like?

“I think,” Abby said at last, “we should keep going just like we are. And see what happens.”

Sam leaned her back onto the couch, kissing her like he had all the time in the world, smiling into her mouth. “I have another fantasy to tell you about.”

“Oh?”

He dropped another kiss on her lips. “It’s the one where we have wild, hot sex forever and our marriage just keeps getting better for it.”

Abby rolled her eyes. “You’re killing me.”

“You love me for it.”

She looked into those warm brown eyes. She’d underestimated their relationship. This was only the beginning.

“Come on, you weirdo.” She nodded toward the bedroom. “I want to get you back into bed.”