Gabe smiled at his best friend as she walked next to him. He liked the idea of working alongside her again. She used to help him on the farm all the time when they were younger; she was a hard worker and they made a good team. Although it did mean spending more time with her and that, he suspected, would only lead to further complications.
What Neve said had stuck with him. Whereas before he had been willing to give his relationship with Pip another go, Neve’s words had now settled into his brain. She was right, Pip was leaving in just over two weeks and she was unlikely to give up travelling the world to stay on Juniper Island with him. He had loved Pip so much when they were younger and it still hadn’t been enough to keep her. Maybe she was too damaged by being abandoned by her birth parents and then when her adopted dad turned against her it was too much. Coupled with twelve years of solitary independence, not relying on anyone else, she had been on her own for a long time. Maybe she could never put her trust in a relationship again. And quite honestly he didn’t know whether he trusted her, either.
They approached the stables where they would eventually keep the ten horses that were being delivered in the spring. There were only two horses there now, poking their heads over the stable doors as they walked past, their hot breath forming billows of steam in the cold air.
‘This is Shadow and Knight,’ Gabe introduced the black and silvery grey horses. Pip smiled as she stroked their velvety noses. ‘Neve’s pride and joy. The plan is we will offer horse rides or pony trekking in the spring and summer once we can no longer use the snowmobiles. We’ll offer bikes for hire too, so people can explore the island. We have ten horses coming at the end of March and Neve has said she will be happy to take people out on treks or pony tours. I think her plan is to offer pony-trekking holidays for the horse-mad like her. I’m not sure if Neve will let anyone ride Shadow or Knight though, they’re her babies. Luke has ridden Knight a few times. I don’t think anyone apart from Neve has ever ridden Shadow.’
‘They’re lovely.’
‘Do you ride?’
‘I have ridden. I wouldn’t say I was a great rider.’
‘Yeah, me too. I’ve never had a great affinity with horses. Neve though, horses are in her blood.’
‘I remember the horse she had when we were little, Diamond, he was a little ginger pony.’
‘He was a strawberry roan, he was adorable.’
‘Neve used to let me ride him when we were kids,’ Pip said.
‘Oh, she must have liked you a lot, she never let us ride him.’
Pip smiled at that. ‘Well you boys were probably too big. Luke was a giant even back then. Though I remember Luke had this special way with animals. Like he could talk to them. I caught him once, hand-feeding a fox.’
‘He still has that kind of affinity with animals now. His dream was always to work at London Zoo. He worked hard at university and went straight from there into his dream job. Worked there for almost eight years I think.’
‘And now he works here? What made him leave?’
He hesitated. He was sure Luke would not appreciate Gabe talking about his personal life behind his back. ‘Let’s just say that things went wrong and the zoo felt tainted for him.’
They left the horses and walked into the barn opposite where they kept the snowmobiles. There were twenty in total, though he would order more if there was the demand for it.
Two sleek black snowmobiles were sitting out the front waiting for them, though Gabe wished he’d asked Boris to leave out only one so he could have Pip on his. He shook his head. What was he thinking? Pip had practically offered herself to him and he’d turned her down and now he was envisioning what it would feel like to have her body wrapped round his again.
‘Do you know how to ride one of these things?’ Gabe asked, laying out a thermal suit, gloves and a helmet for her.
‘I’ve done it quite a few times over the years. I had some great instructors.’
He didn’t want to know what was so great about the instructors she’d had. The thought of her with other men was not a pleasant one, though he knew it was hypocritical to be angry about it considering the number of women he’d been with over the years.
‘We’ll go round the perimeter of the island first; it won’t take too long but I’d prefer to be back here when it gets dark. Then I’ll show you the resort once we get back – it looks better in the dark when it’s all lit up.’
She nodded and he watched her get kitted up. He moved to make sure her helmet was on securely and she stared up at him with those beautiful golden eyes. Having her here was going to be trouble.
‘Why don’t you go in front,’ Gabe said, as they walked back outside. He watched as Pip put her camera in the compartment under her seat. ‘There’s only one trail, so you can’t get lost.’
‘Do you want me to go in front so you can stare at my bum?’ Pip laughed.
That made him smile. She had grown in confidence since she was seventeen. She had always been quiet and shy, especially when it came to things like kissing and sex.
She sighed, probably at his lack of reaction. ‘Sorry. I was just joking. This is so weird for me. The last time I saw you, you were making love to me and now we’re just friends. It’s… ’
‘Awkward? Yeah, for me too.’
She stared at him for a long moment. ‘Would you prefer it if I wasn’t here? We could arrange for the plane to take me back to Edinburgh tomorrow. Tonight probably if you’re super keen to get rid of me.’
‘That’s the last thing I want.’
‘Then lighten up and stop staring at me like I’m breaking your heart all over again. This is difficult for me too.’
She got on the snowmobile and roared off down the path. He stared after her. He almost didn’t recognise this new Pip, but it didn’t stop him from wanting to rekindle their romance all over again.
He hopped on his snowmobile and followed her. Any worries about her not being able to control the snowmobile were unfounded as she careened around corners at high speed, whooping with delight and manoeuvring the machine with skill and bravery.
Finally, on a long stretch, she slowed down a little and he caught up with her. She didn’t say anything as they coasted along the path and he didn’t, either.
They passed a herd of Shetland ponies on a field, eating the fresh food that had been put out for them earlier that morning.
‘What’s the deal with these ponies? Stephen said they were savage,’ Pip said, her voice raised slightly so she could be heard over the noise of the engine.
Gabe laughed. ‘That’s probably a little bit of an exaggeration. Most of the ponies stay out of the way, and don’t wander into the village at all.’
‘What about Leo and his gang?’
‘They’re a bunch of thieves.’
‘What?’
‘They come into the village and around the resort and they steal things.’
‘Like food?’
‘Like anything. Clothes, jewellery, money.’
‘Are you serious?’
He nodded. ‘They’re not so bad in the winter because the doors and windows are closed. In the summer most of the houses, especially those that overlook the sea, have their doors open. Leo’s gang started walking into people’s homes and stealing things. Anything they could get their mouths on before they were chased back out. We’re a bit worried about the Christmas market, whether they’ll strike once the shops are open to the public. We might have to fence off the town and put cattle grids over the road.’
‘What are they doing with all the things they steal, opening a black market of stolen goods or selling them over the internet?’
‘I think they might be raising money for sex and drugs.’
Pip laughed. ‘Proper little bed of sin you have going on up here. Does no one try to stop them?’
‘Well, that’s what has Stephen all upset about them. Leo came into his house a few months ago, stole the TV remote. Stephen tried to stop him and Leo made a run for it, trampled Stephen’s feet. Apparently Leo broke a bone in Stephen’s toe in the attempt to get away and he still made it out with the TV remote.’
Pip giggled, shaking her head in disbelief.
Gabe smiled at her. He had missed this and he’d forgotten how much. Just being with her, chatting to her, it felt so good.
‘Oh, pull over there, there’s a great viewpoint,’ Gabe suggested.
Pip did as she was told, cut the engine and climbed off the snowmobile as Gabe did the same.
She grabbed her camera and she stood on the edge of the cliff tops staring out at the sea as the icy cold coastal wind whipped around them. It was one of Gabe’s favourite views in the world.
There was silence for a long time but Gabe didn’t feel the need to fill it. She was just enjoying the view and he loved seeing that look of happiness and contentment on her face. His eyes stayed on her not the sea as she started taking photos and he could suddenly see himself staring at this view with his best friend for the rest of his life. He had always told himself that he wasn’t looking for marriage or a long-term relationship: he’d have fun with women but he never looked for anything serious. He realised now that was because he only ever wanted that with Pip. Now she was back he didn’t want to let her go. He wanted that second chance with her, he wanted to see how things would go between them with no holding back, but was there enough time to build something strong enough to make her want to stay in a few weeks’ time? Would he be enough to make her want to stay?
Realising that he was staring at her, Pip looked over at him, her eyes meeting his curiously. That same chemistry sparked between them and he ached to reach out and touch her, stroke her face, kiss her hard and feel her body against his. Neither of them moved or said anything, but her eyes fell to his lips and he knew she was thinking about kissing him too.
Eventually Gabe dragged his eyes from her and looked out over the sea. ‘We’re at the southernmost point of the island, and you can see some of the other Shetland Islands. In front of us is Unst and to the side of it, in the distance, you can see the very edges of Fetlar and Yell.’
‘It’s beautiful,’ Pip said, returning her gaze to the view.
‘You think so? You must have seen so much beauty on your travels.’
‘But this is so…raw. I don’t know, there’s something so peaceful and tranquil about this place and so barren and remote too. It feels safe here.’
‘Would you stay?’ Gabe blurted out then immediately regretted it. ‘I mean, could you honestly see yourself living here?’
She shifted her gaze from the view back to him.
‘Hypothetically,’ he added.
‘I don’t know. The world is a big and wonderful place, there’s lots I haven’t yet seen. Where would you be in this hypothetical situation? Would you go back to your hotel in New York once this place is up and running or the one in California, or move on to a new venture?’
‘I’d be here. I want somewhere safe to raise Wren. As much as I love the bustle of New York and the warmth and beauty of California, I want somewhere for Wren where I don’t have to fear for her safety. The world is a crazy place and every time I open up the papers and read about people killing each other I just want to find a private island somewhere for me and her to live out the rest of our days. This is as close as I can get to that private island.’
‘You can’t think like that, though. You can’t live in fear of what might happen. People die in car accidents all the time, people trip and die from a bang to the head, and there are so many horrible illnesses and diseases out there that people die of all the time. Life is short and precious, the world is a beautiful place full of wonderful and rich experiences, and you need to share that with her.’
‘I will. I want to. You inspire me so much, travelling the world on your own, doing your own thing, and in many ways I want that for Wren, I want her to see it all. But right now she is so tiny and I want to protect her for as long as possible. I want to give her stability too, and there has been a lot of travelling with my job. I don’t want to be dragging her around the world and away from her friends. I want her to have what we had, not necessarily fall in love with her best friend but to have a best friend she can turn to, always.’
‘I understand that.’
He waited for her to answer his previous question but the conversation seemed to have moved on and he didn’t want to push her. It was stupid even to ask.
‘We should move on. It gets dark so early up here and I’d like to get back before it gets too late.’
He climbed back on his snowmobile and she followed him.
Pip laughed as she beat Gabe in another race. She wasn’t sure if he was letting her win or whether she was just more confident on the snowmobiles than he was, but it felt good to have this with him rather than the intense looks and feelings that had been crashing between them when they had stood on the cliff top.
He had been going to kiss her, she was sure of it, and she wouldn’t have done anything to stop him.
There was no way they could spend the next few weeks together and not let anything happen between them, the chemistry was too strong. But if something did happen, could she stay? Would he want her to? The question circulated around her head and then took hold. If she did, it wouldn’t be a teenage romance any more where they would just hold hands and kiss. They couldn’t exactly go out on dates; living on the island meant there was really nowhere to go for that. It would be unlikely there would be anywhere for her to live either, as she couldn’t stay in the guest accommodation and the village probably only held twenty or thirty houses, all of them probably occupied. She would have to live with him and that meant being in a proper relationship. She wouldn’t just be living with him either: there was his four-year-old daughter too and that all seemed very sudden and scary.
She smiled as she thought about it some more. Yes, it felt scary but wonderful too.
Gabe pulled alongside her again and he was laughing too. ‘You’re too good for me, you don’t seem to have any fear.’
‘Life is too short to be scared.’
Pip smiled as she applied that to her last thought.
‘Seize the day?’ Gabe said.
Pip nodded.
‘Oh, pull over here, there’s another great viewpoint.’
Pip pulled over where she was directed and they both cut the engines and climbed off the snowmobiles.
Pip moved to the edge of the cliff tops and could see nothing but the endless sea as it stretched for miles in every direction. The water was a deep navy here, instead of the lighter blue on the southern side. The waves crashed angrily on the rocks below, the water rough and tempestuous.
‘We are standing on the northernmost point of the British Isles.’
‘Oh. Not many people can say that.’
‘No. I think it’s pretty special and look…’
He pulled his phone from his pocket and swiped a few keys. He moved the phone around slightly as if trying to align it with something. Finding what he wanted, he moved behind her still holding the phone out in front of her so his arms were around her. She found her breath catching in her throat at his warmth and proximity. His wonderful scent washed over her, filling her with so many memories of the times he had held her in his arms before. His scent was like fresh-cut grass, of trees and rain, mixed with the citrus scent of his body wash, oranges and limes. It was divine and she wanted to stay there all day.
He was still fiddling with his phone and she forced herself to glance down at it as he clearly was trying to show her something. She realised there was a compass on the screen.
‘There, see the arrow pointing to the north? Follow that arrow out into the sea.’
She nodded, not trusting herself to speak.
‘There is nothing between us and the North Pole, no land, nothing but sea. Over to the north-west we’d come to the Faroe Islands, Iceland and Greenland and over in the north-east there is Sweden and Svalbard, but there is nothing to the north of us. If we could fly from here in a straight line we’d soon be standing on top of the world. I think that’s pretty special.’
She swallowed the lump of emotion that had stalled in her throat. She felt the shift of awareness in him as he realised that he had his arms wrapped around her. He didn’t move his arms, though. The moment stretched on and she knew that neither of them was looking at his phone or out to the horizon any more.
Pip closed her eyes for a second. Seize the day.
She turned round in his arms and stared up at him. His eyes darkened as he gazed at her.
She needed to say something. She had to tell him they needed to explore these feelings between them before it drove them both mad, but before she had time to open her mouth to speak, he bent his head down towards her and his mouth came down hard on top of hers.