“I started working for that big company, remember the one I told you about?” Alice said.
“Sure, how is it?”
“We’re starting with small tasks, but I think I’m getting the grip of it. It’s so easy to communicate with them, they assigned me a manager who assists me with any problems. He said they were so impressed with my portfolio, that they think I am a perfect candidate for a specific role they need. They’ll teach me everything I need to know,” she said, a small smile on her lips, eyes on a road ahead.
“I’m proud of you, I really am.”
“It’s time to set up your profile,” she said.
I was silent for a bit. “What if I fail? What if nobody hires me?”
The familiar dread of future employment dripped in my veins, pulsing.
“Remember, it’s just remote work. You will see if freelance works for you, if not, at least you tried. But I think,” she said and glanced sideways at me, “I think you’ll love it. It suits your personality.”
“Okay.”
“Let’s set it tonight,” Alice said, her eyes sparkling. “We can do it on my laptop, I’ll show you everything.”
“To hell with it, let’s do it,” I said.
She laughed. “Drink your cocoa.”
* * *
The house was dark when she turned into the driveway.
“Jake is out with Brian, should be back soon,” Alice said, parking the car.
I grabbed the bag of sweets and our empty cups and climbed out of the car. I looked at the dark house and a slow smile tugged the corners of my lips. I loved that house and everything that happened inside.
Alice unlocked the door and turned on the light. I shrugged off my coat and placed it on the hanger. Her running shoes were pushed into the corner; it seemed Alice resumed running after New Year.
“Let’s go to my room,” she said.
Her room was cozy, with stacked bookshelves, and a huge dreamcatcher. An open notebook lay on the table, unfamiliar letters formed words in Alice’s handwriting, poems. She opened her laptop and typed the password to log in. Alice picked up a neatly folded sweater from her bed.
“Do you want to change into something homey?” she asked.
I shook my head. “Let me help you change.”
I lifted her hoodie and slowly circled my hands around her waist, the skin warm under my fingertips. Her lips slowly parted, as her breathing became shallower. I helped her out of the hoodie, tracing the edge of her bra. She was looking at my fingers.
I found her lips, slowly, and unfastened her bra, her breast fitting in my palm perfectly.
“Emily, I know you’re trying to distract me,” she said, a smile on her lips, “to avoid setting up a profile.”
She was right, but it wasn’t the first reason on the list. The first was that I missed her, I missed her skin on mine, our bodies tangled together, I missed kissing her ... everywhere.
“I’ll be quick,” I teased.
But I wanted nothing more than for it to be not quick. I needed all the time in the world to have with her.
And then I didn’t have her, because the familiar rumble of Jake’s Toyota sounded on the driveway. Alice sighed, stepping away from me, and fastening the bra, draping her sweater on.
She looked at me for a second, sadness written all over her face. Again, a glimpse of that anguish I saw she had in the car. She was hurting.
“I’ll make it right,” I whispered, looking down.
She shook her head. “There is no right way, somebody would be hurt anyway. I’m trying, Emily, I really am.”
The front door opened downstairs, and a familiar cheerful voice shouted hello. Alice stepped past me and placed her hand on the door handle. She closed her eyes for a second, and took a fast breath in, smoothing her features. She opened the door and met Jake on the stairs.
“Hey, look who’s here,” Alice said.
When Jake’s eyes met mine, his face shone with a smile. He came closer, and wrapped me in a hug, burying his face in my hair.
“We’re about to set up my freelance profile,” I said when he stepped back.
“I’ll leave you two to it. Let me know if I can help,” he said and winked at Alice on the way to his room.
Alice dragged a chair up for me and we sat in front of her laptop. She opened the website for the biggest freelance platform I knew and clicked on a profile icon. A smiling photo of her looked back at us, and sections for skills, portfolio, and information were filled in neatly.
A few hours later, and after many groans from me, a similar profile page was filled under my name. It took us more than an hour to fill in my skills section. As I claimed I had none, Alice had to collect grains of information from me, typing them in sporadically.
When it was finished, I was ready to give it a day, but Alice clicked on the Jobs icon and typed in a few skills from my page into the search bar. It revealed three pages of results, one catching my eye immediately.
Jake knocked on the door and wished us good night, quickly kissing my forehead, and closing the door. A shower ran a few minutes later.
But I was transfixed by the list in front of me. I could actually do what was required in these jobs. Alice sorted the list so it showed beginners' jobs first, and as I read the requirements, the tight ball of anxiety that was always in the back of my mind shook, easing just a fraction.
I looked at her, stunned.
“I can do this,” I said and pointed to the job. Even though it was a beginner job, the payment per hour set made my jaw drop. “I actually know how to do this task.”
“And there are only three other applicants now,” Alice said.
She clicked on the Apply button and turned the laptop to me. There was a standard message asking a client to take a look at my profile.
“We can leave it as it is. You have 10 free applications per month, afterward, you need to pay for them, but they are cheap. Let’s apply for a few now,” she said, and before I could protest, she hit Send.
She opened the next job on the list, and the next. We used five applications in half an hour.
“You see, it’s easy. Now we wait,” she said and turned to me.
It was past midnight. The house was silent, but I could hear my heart beating.
“What if I could actually work like this?” I asked.
“Of course, you could. Given how much you know, and the demand on the market, you’ll be fine.”
She stood up and stretched her back.
“Can I sleep with you tonight?” I asked.
“There’s no way I’m driving you back now.”
I laughed.
“I’m going to the shower. You can browse the website more,” she said, taking her silky nightgown from the shelf.
I wanted to go to the shower with her. I wanted to do everything with her, but with Jake behind the wall, it would be something we agreed not to do. The rules of appropriateness.
As the water started running, I clicked through the website. At least five jobs with requirements of my skill set appeared daily. Now I just needed to wait on replies to my applications, if I got any. I turned off the laptop and installed the app on my phone. After logging in, the familiar list of applications opened. It would always be with me.
Alice came back from the bathroom, small water droplets glistening on her neck. I stood up and smiled at her.
“I’ll be right back,” I said.
After a quick shower, I combed through my tangled hair, and an idea sparked in my mind. Back in her room, Alice was reading a book on the left side of her bed—the right was reserved for me. I quietly closed the door behind me and turned to her.
A damp towel was wrapped around my body. With a flick of my wrist, it slowly dropped to my feet. Alice’s hand flew to her mouth, as her eyes widened. I stood by the door, naked. I wanted her to see me.
“Come here,” she whispered.
And I did. I crawled under the covers, her fingers tracing the skin on my hips, my belly, my shoulders.
She kissed me deeply, a strong want building inside me. In a moment I slipped Alice’s nightgown over her head. It quietly landed on the floor. I rubbed the silk of her panties, and she trembled.
“You need to be quiet,” I whispered in her ear.
Alice turned and pressed her back into my breasts, that way I had easy access to the parts of her I wanted most.
She quickly slipped out of her underwear and parted her legs. My fingers slid like warm butter as she moved under my touch. Quiet gasps escaped her. I put a palm over her lips, her body rubbing against mine. She came fast.
Alice turned and faced me. She was still breathing hard. I brushed my hand over my lips and licked my fingertips.
“You can’t do things like this, you just tease me. There are rules,” she said, her eyes on my lips.
“To hell with rules, Alice.”
She propped herself up on her elbows and looked at me. I loved the angle her shoulders took, her neck straight, how I could see just an inch of dark skin around her nipples.
“I need you to be quiet,” she whispered. “I know how vocal you are, promise me to be quiet.”
“I promise,” I said, as she gently drew a finger over my breast.
She opened the covers, dropping them to the side. The chilly air touched my skin.
Alice kissed me slowly.
“Remember that you promised,” she whispered.
And she went down on me, tenderly, growing faster. I held on dearly to my promise, clasping a hand over my lips, the other lost in the silk of Alice’s hair. God, she knew what she was doing, and she knew what I liked. Because losing myself to her was the most beautiful thing I ever did. And I lost it, muffling my moans in the covers.
Alice put a hand to my racing heart, and slowly touched my lips. In her hands, I drifted away.