I knocked softly—an apprehensive bumping of my knuckle to the metal screen door—and waited for Mrs. Richards to answer, waited for my courage to emerge.
This is a stupid idea, I thought, staring at the peephole, imagining a discerning eye on the other end. What possessed you to drive to Milwaukee—during rush hour no less—to see someone who may or may not be home, who may or may not welcome your visit?
Mark.
Well, Beth and Mark.
I’d finished reading Beth’s copy of A Room of One’s Own Monday night, hunting for more notes in the margin, more clues as to Beth’s possible relationship with Mark, and found nothing as incriminating as Like Cassie’s Cabin. And yet, I couldn’t shake the notion that Beth Richards had been in love with Mark. I admit, it was illogical thinking. Three words—a simple reference to his mother’s writing retreat—was not proof of her affection. And yet those words, the deep indigo hue of the ink, the whimsical, curly tips of the letter C, connoted an emotion I understood at my core, a sick-to-your-stomach aching to love and be loved. I had to know.
And that is why I stood outside Beth Richards’s home at dusk on Tuesday evening, despite logic.
Curiosity trumped logic.
I rapped on the door again, this time more deliberately, but my knocking was met with silence, less the flutter of a light breeze. I waited another minute before walking back to my car in defeat.
I was putting my car into reverse when I saw the front door of the brick bungalow swing open, and a woman—her shoulder-length blond hair a shade darker because it was wet—dash down the porch steps toward my car, so quickly, she skipped a step and almost slipped. She waved a yellow towel at me, then mimicked a crossing guard by raising her hand in an effort to get me to stop. She was mouthing something too, but I couldn’t hear her over the car radio.
By the time I put the car into park and rolled down my window, she was beside my driver-side door.
“I was in the shower,” she blurted between huffs of breath.
“I’m sorry.”
She shook her head so adamantly, drips of water fell from her hair to the men’s flannel shirt she was wearing; it was two sizes too big, more like a nightshirt, and something I imagined she threw on just to answer the door.
“No, I’m sorry. I was in there all of about three minutes.” She spoke feverishly, still coming off the adrenaline rush from her Olympic feat of answering the door. “Of all the times for you to come . . . Is this . . . Are you here about Beth?”
The woman needed no introduction—she was Beth Richards’s mom. I knew that the moment our eyes met. She looked exactly like her daughter, only older, in the uncanny way my mother and I looked alike, and I immediately recalled Beth Richards, something I had up to that point been unable to do without access to my college yearbooks. My memory of her sharpened—the long blond hair, the calm blue eyes, the lean and athletic build of a runner, and a natural beauty, one that did not depend on lipstick or eyeliner but rather a healthy glow similar to the pink-cheeked aftermath of exercise.
But Mrs. Richards did not have that glow. Her eyes—rimmed by puffy, dark circles from a combination of sleep deprivation and tears—danced wide and focused with desperate anticipation. A bead of water ran down the side of her face, but she didn’t seem to notice. The towel remained in her grip.
I opened the car door to address her more directly. “I’m Ruby Rousseau,” I said before adding, “I had Beth’s suitcase.”
“Yes. Yes. Ruby.” She nodded too many times, reminding me of a bobble head, before furrowing her brow. “Didn’t the detective get it from you yesterday?”
“He did. You haven’t seen it?”
“I can’t, not until they ‘process’ it.” She used air quotes to illustrate her frustration.
I was about to explain what I was doing there, but she continued her rant.
“And the Pittsburgh Police don’t seem to be doing anything either. You know, I wanted to go out there, to Pennsylvania, and they told me not to. I offered to call Beth’s friends or people she knows, and Detective Pickens told me to let the police do their job. I told them I wanted Beth’s picture on the news, and they said we needed to wait. Wait for what? We don’t have time to wait.”
After looking into Mrs. Richards’s desperate eyes, hearing the anxiety in her voice, I chastised myself for even being there. This woman’s daughter was missing, presumably dead, and I had the audacity to bother her, drag her out of the only shower she’d probably taken in days—the only three minutes in which she’d thought of herself—just to snoop into Beth’s private life, just to find out whether something I “sensed” from reading the margin of a book was true. Mrs. Richards wanted information, clues to her daughter’s whereabouts. That’s why she’d rushed out the door with sopping wet hair, almost breaking her neck on the steps. What a disappointment, I thought, when she discovers I have nothing concrete to offer.
I swallowed the lump of guilt in my throat. “I can’t imagine how hard this is for you, Mrs. Richards,” I said, preparing to leave. “I’m so sorry to have bothered you.”
She stopped me.
“I want to be bothered.” Her voice boomed. “The police haven’t bothered me enough. I’m going crazy, Ruby, just waiting for things to ‘process’ or ‘solidify’ or ‘come to fruition’ or whatever police jargon the detective is using today.” She looked back at me, her eyes suddenly soft and tearful. “I need to talk. To a human being, someone other than myself. Can you . . . can you come inside?”
Stepping into the foyer of the house, I took in the smell of burnt coffee and stale air, a home in desperate need of a cracked window. A volcano of unopened mail had erupted on the console. Several newspapers, still in plastic sleeves muddy from a recent rain, sat on the yellowed linoleum just inside the door.
Mrs. Richards threw her wet towel on top of the pile of newspapers. “There’s all this shit in this house,” she blurted. “And yet without Beth, it feels so empty.”
I found her vernacular both startling and endearing, yet I didn’t know what to say, or whether I should say anything. Suddenly I felt the need to lie, to give a solid reason for my impromptu visit. But just as I was about to speak, Mrs. Richards let out a sigh, took my hands in hers, and patted them hard several times, as if to absolve me of a lifetime of sins.
“Should we have something warm to drink?” she asked.
I was about to say “I don’t want to bother you” but remembered she wanted to be bothered. Instead I followed her to the kitchen.
Mrs. Richards cleared space for me at the table, and I stole a glance at the plethora of sticky notes and maps and papers and photos that had not only overtaken the tabletop, but also grown like a vine up the adjoining wall. It seemed Mrs. Richards was running her own investigation on Beth’s disappearance, and the table served as headquarters.
“I keep going over it, every detail, thinking I’ll see something different than last time,” she explained as she pulled her damp locks up into a ponytail before moving to the stove to put on a teakettle.
A Room of One’s Own—Beth’s notes in the margin—could be the something different she is looking for, I thought, but I decided to take the book out of my purse later, when the time was right. We would baby step our way there; we would meet her needs before mine.
I eyed her collection of sticky notes and maps again and imagined my own mother doing the same if I were the missing girl, that she would not rest—physically or mentally—until she found me. My curiosity mounted.
“I don’t know much about what happened,” I said. “The detective was pretty tight-lipped about Beth’s case.”
Mrs. Richards pulled a canister of tea bags from the countertop and set it on the table. “I’m Beth’s mother, and I can’t get information out of him.”
“It wasn’t in the newspaper either,” I added.
“Thank you.” She plopped down in the chair across from me then, as if I’d finally given her permission to do so. “I just don’t understand why Beth’s face isn’t all over the television. I mean, how can people find her if they don’t know she’s missing? How will they spot her if they don’t know what she looks like?”
I remembered asking Detective Pickens a similar question, and his answer had been elusive. Like Mrs. Richards, I couldn’t fathom why Beth’s story had not made it to the national news stations.
Beth’s mother reached past me for a manila folder, pulled a photo from it, and handed it to me. “This is the one I picked out for the news broadcasts,” she said.
It was Beth’s senior picture from Tarble. “She was beautiful,” I said.
“Was.” Mrs. Richards’s lips trembled as she stared at her daughter’s picture over my shoulder. “I can’t get myself to use that word.”
“Is,” I blurted, damning the obituaries for conditioning me to use the past tense. “She is beautiful.”
She gave me a forgiving smile, not big but perhaps the most she could manage.
“Do you want to go over it again?” I offered, trying to repair the damage of my earlier word choice. “I actually work for a newspaper in Chicago.”
“You’re a journalist?”
I nodded, then shrugged, then nodded again. Given the circumstances, it would be inappropriate, I thought, to tell her what I really did for a living.
“I’ve got a fresh pair of eyes and ears,” I added.
Mrs. Richards let out a long breath, as if she’d been holding it under water for weeks.
“It was Friday. Just this past Friday,” she finally said. “I dropped Beth off at Mitchell—that’s the airport here in Milwaukee—just past three o’clock. She was going to Pittsburgh for the weekend for a photography workshop. Did you know Beth was an amateur photographer?”
I shook my head. “I thought she majored in science.”
“She did. Biology. She’s in medical school now, here in Milwaukee. But her dad bought her a thirty-five millimeter when she was five, and I guess you could say photography has been her artistic outlet ever since.”
Beth’s mom went on to tell me that the workshop, the one Beth was going to in Pittsburgh, was on wedding photography. Beth thought she could shoot ceremonies on weekends and during the summer to help pay her steep tuition.
“I didn’t understand why she had to go to Pittsburgh of all places,” her mother noted. “But I know better than to question Beth when she sets her mind to something, though I am the one who convinced her to fly. She wanted to drive, and I told her it wasn’t safe. A woman alone driving on the Interstate for ten hours.” She rested her chin on her hand. “It’s my fault.”
I recognized the guilt contracting the muscles of her face. “But how could you have known? My mom would have said the same thing,” I offered.
She nodded, but unconvincingly. “I made Beth promise to call when she got there,” she continued. “Her flight was at five, and it’s an hour-and-twenty-minute trip, give or take, so I expected a call no later than seven. But hours went by, and she never called. So I started calling her, a dozen or so times, and it just kept going to voice mail. I thought maybe her flight had been delayed, and she couldn’t answer her phone because she was still in the air. But then I checked the status of her flight on the computer—Beth showed me how to do that once—and that’s when I found out her plane had landed on time, many hours before. And so I called the hotel, it was nearing midnight by then in Pittsburgh, and they said she hadn’t checked in yet.”
She paused only to take a breath. I didn’t interrupt.
“I knew something was wrong. I just did. It wasn’t like Beth, but I told myself to be rational. You know, I didn’t want to overreact. I started thinking she had missed her flight and took another one, a later one. And maybe she hadn’t charged her phone and that’s why she hadn’t answered it. But I watched the sun come up, and I still hadn’t heard from her. I didn’t know who to call. So I dialed 911 and they connected me to Detective Pickens.”
I recalled my conversation with the detective the day before. “And he found out she was on the plane, after all?”
“Her ticket had been processed, and the flight attendant remembered her.” Mrs. Richards’s eyes teared then, and she pulled a crumpled tissue from the pocket of her jeans. When the tissue gave out, she used the back of her hand. She crossed her arms then, as if warding off a chill, the remnants of what no longer looked like a tissue dangling from her hand. “So Beth is somewhere in Pittsburgh. But where? What happened to my daughter?”
As if on cue, the stove flame singed the wet bottom of the teakettle and let out a startling hiss. Mrs. Richards hurried to the stove. Silence filled the room while she tended the teapot and I looked through the assorted tea bags in the canister on the table. I selected something herbal, cinnamon apple, and set the bag down in front of me as soon as she started talking again.
“And the police . . . I don’t understand. Have they checked the hospitals? Beth wasn’t feeling well before she left. She’d been fatigued and lethargic. She didn’t have much of an appetite. Maybe she fainted in the airport bathroom and hit her head and has amnesia. And she’s just sitting in some hospital bed in Pittsburgh, staring out the window, not knowing who she is.”
As Mrs. Richards poured hot water into two mugs on the counter, I looked at the contents of the table and wall once more. There was a timeline, including exact times for every Internet search Mrs. Richards had conducted over the course of four days, and every phone call. I found my name there under Sunday @ 6:15 P.M. It was misspelled “Ruby Russo,” with the added detail, “Friend from Tarble, has Beth’s suitcase,” in black pen and another note in red pen, perhaps an afterthought, “Sounded genuine. Not a suspect.”
I turned my eyes from the wall when Mrs. Richards approached the table with our mugs. Each boasted its own silver stirring spoon.
“What do you think?” she asked, selecting the same herbal tea I did from the jar. “How did my daughter vanish into thin air?”
I stalled by dipping my tea bag into the mug several times; it was piping hot, and I burned my finger. “Mrs. Richards . . .”
“—You can call me Janice,” she said.
“Okay. Janice. I don’t think it’s my place to hypothesize.”
“You can be honest.”
I shrugged and wondered if Detective Pickens had shared his missing persons statistics with Beth’s mother, if she knew the odds were against her.
“A mother should know, shouldn’t she?” Janice went on. “If her own child is dead? I would know. And I just don’t believe . . . I feel her, Ruby. Here.” She placed her palm flat on her chest.
I remembered how I’d felt the evening prior, reading Beth’s book in its entirety, looking for more clues about Mark. I’d felt Beth, even heard her voice, as if she was speaking to me not beyond the grave but perhaps just before it.
“Then trust your instincts,” I told Janice.
Beth’s mother clutched her mug like a teddy bear and stared into her tea. She looked so lonely.
“Do you have other children?” I asked.
She shook her head. “It’s just Beth and me. Ken—my husband, Beth’s father—passed a long time ago. Beth was seven. She was devastated. You know how little girls are with their daddies.”
I did know, and yet I would have said I knew better how little girls were without their daddies. I told Janice then about my own father’s unexpected death, and that I too was an only child.
“I never knew we had so much in common,” I said, suddenly reminded of why I’d come to visit Janice in the first place. Did Beth and I have more in common than family dynamics? I wondered. Had we both been in love with the same man?
“Did Beth keep in touch with many girls from Tarble over the summer?” I asked, playing with the tea bag in my cup. I sensed Janice had met an emotional threshold on the subject of her daughter’s disappearance and would be up to changing the subject, a subject I so desperately wanted to indulge.
“Sure. She went there to visit some friends taking summer session.”
I dropped the tea bag. “Do you remember any of these girls’ names?”
“One of them works for the college. Heidi. She was in your class.”
Heidi Callahan. I’d thought my former best friend—the only Heidi in our class—was back home in Minneapolis. And yet all summer, she’d apparently been at Tarble, working for the college after graduation. But Heidi and Beth had never been friends; they were acquaintances, just like Beth and me. Was it possible they’d become friends after I dropped out?
“How often did Beth go?” I asked.
“Almost every weekend.”
“She went for the day?”
“Sometimes she stayed overnight, even though we live so close. It was fun for her, I think, staying in the dorms. Like she never graduated.” Janice set her mug down on the table then with a thud, as if she’d reached a conclusion. “Ruby, I see where you’re going with this. And I think you’re right.”
I stared back at her in confusion. There was no way she knew my ulterior motive. “I am?”
“We need to tell people at Tarble about Beth.”
“Oh. Right. We do.”
“The detective talked to some students and professors at the med school, but I don’t think he has talked to anyone from Tarble. Except you. And there might be someone who knows something.”
Could it be Mark? I wondered. Was he the someone who knew something? Had Beth really been visiting Heidi Callahan all summer? Or was that just the excuse Beth gave her mother so she could spend weekends with Mark?
“When was the last time she went to Tarble?” I asked.
“I think it was the beginning of September. She’s been home every weekend since.”
“Why did she stop going?”
“School started. Too busy, I guess. Plus, like I told you, she wasn’t feeling her best.” Janice set her mug down again. “You know, I’ve been meaning to call Sarah to tell her. But I don’t have her phone number.”
“You mean Beth’s roommate? Sarah Iverson?”
Janice nodded.
“She doesn’t know Beth is missing?”
“I wanted to call her, see if she’d heard from Beth, but the detective told me to wait. Like I said before, wait for what?”
I didn’t understand why Detective Pickens was keeping a tight lid on Beth’s disappearance, why he wasn’t interested in Beth’s past friends or relationships at Tarble. He had a hidden motive, perhaps. And I had mine. By that point, Beth’s book was burning a hole through my purse, and I needed to find a nonchalant way of introducing the topic to Janice.
I remembered the postcard tucked inside the book.
“Did you know Tarble’s Reunion is this weekend?” I asked, finally removing the bag from my tea. It had grown bitter from being steeped too long. “Did Beth mention it?”
Just then, the phone rang, and Janice ran out of the room to answer it. “I don’t let any call go to the answering machine,” she explained.
I finished my last sip of tea before picking up a stack of photos from the table. I saw Beth at age six, wearing a pink tutu. Beth at age twelve, in a ski parka and glasses. Beth at sixteen in an aquamarine evening dress, posed in front of a fireplace beside a boy with a matching cumberbund and bow tie. Janice must have collected the snapshots in the past few days, trying to scrounge up the memory of her daughter, physical evidence that she existed, and still exists. I started thinking that if Beth was dead—I wanted to believe she was alive—but if she was dead, if she never came home, these photos would be all she had left. And it was then I decided not to show A Room of One’s Own to Janice. I would not dare introduce the idea that Beth might have had an affair with a married man. I wasn’t going to be the one to destroy Beth’s reputation with her mother. It wouldn’t be fair. After all, my own mother did not know about Mark.
I peeked around the corner of the kitchen then and saw Janice had taken the phone to a four-season room at the rear of the house, perhaps for privacy. I figured it was the only chance I’d get to return Beth’s book to its rightful place, and I took it.
I found Beth’s bedroom door partially ajar at the end of the hall and pushed it open, forcefully, because it stuck on the thick carpet. Once inside, I felt the urge to snoop, to peek into the life of this girl I had not truly known. But I feared Janice would somehow know I’d intruded. Instead, I let my eyes examine the space. Beyond the neatly made twin bed, recently dusted dresser, and clutter-free desk, the room served as an exhibit of sorts for this budding photographer. Pictures—some portraits, some landscapes, some abstract—covered every available inch of wall space. Some were displayed in formal frames behind glass; others hung nonchalantly off metal clips resembling wooden clothes hangers.
Along the far wall, a collection of photographs caught my eye, each an artistic-angled snapshot of the Tarble College campus. Beth’s subject choice startled me. Far from being commercial or brochure worthy, the pictures captured the day-to-day happenings of campus life with the keen eye of a student. A sunlit staircase in Langley Hall. The sun rising over Lake Michigan. A tree losing its leaves in front of the student center. The little red bridge over the creek at the edge of campus.
The red bridge. It had been Mark’s favorite spot to meet up, conveniently on campus but private. I’d walk there and wait for him—sometimes feeding bread to the ducks swimming below, sometimes just taking in the tree-lined view of Frieburg Chapel. Coincidentally, Beth’s picture, taken in late fall, captured my exact perspective the very last time I’d stood on that bridge waiting for Mark. Bare tree branches. A muddy gray sky.
I released the photo from the metal-and-wire hanger to get a closer look, disregarding my earlier decision not to touch anything. Immediately, I heard a whoosh sound echo off the wall, followed by a crisp tap on the baseboard. It was another picture, one Beth had concealed behind the photo of the bridge. Two faces stared back at me as I reached to pick it up. Beth and Mark. Together. Smiling. His arm around her. Her head resting slightly on his shoulder. It was a close-up, the background fuzzy. But I guessed the photo had been taken at some sort of play or musical performance. In the distance, I made out a few men in suits and a woman wearing an old-fashioned wide-brimmed hat and draped scarf, obviously one of the performers interacting with the audience in the lobby after the show.
“You know the problem with photographs,” Mark had said to me once, when I tried to take our picture, my arm extended as far away as possible to snap a good shot. “They’re like diaries. Incriminating.”
As my cheeks flushed with jealousy, I heard footsteps in the hallway and instinctually tucked the photo into my purse, between the pages of A Room of One’s Own, to keep it from being bent. It was officially the second personal belonging I’d stolen from Beth Richards.
I turned in time to see Janice in the doorway and prepared to explain why I was in Beth’s bedroom without her. Janice did not look angry, though. All the color in her cheeks had faded to gray. Her eyes had turned glassy.
Palms open, she held the cordless phone out to me, as if it were covered in blood.
“The detective said Beth fits a profile,” was all she said.
“A profile?” I asked. “Of what?”
Janice dropped the phone. “The victim of a serial killer.”
Waiting to talk to Detective Pickens, I sat in the Milwaukee Police Department corridor and tried to erase the images from my mind—of Beth’s hands bound with rope, her mouth gagged, her pale white body floating facedown in a river, a dirty finger-nailed man approaching her from behind—but they replayed like scenes from Law & Order. And the words came: Beth Richards, 22, of Milwaukee, died October 8—
Fortunately, Detective Pickens maneuvered through the heavy steel door and interrupted Beth’s obituary middraft. “Ms. Rousseau?”
I jumped to my feet. “You startled me.”
“You’ve succeeded in surprising me as well. What can I do for you? Or did you drive two hours just to say hello?”
“I was at Janice’s house when you called,” I explained.
Truth was, I hadn’t had time to return Beth’s book to its proper place in her room. And I certainly wasn’t going to bring it up to Janice after she told me about the serial killer. My only option—once Janice’s sister, Susan, arrived to relieve me of my sitting with Janice duties—was to deliver the book to a more objective party.
Detective Pickens, unfortunately, was that person.
He lurched his head toward the door. “To my office,” he said.
I followed him into a white hallway that seemed brighter than the midday sun. We walked in silence, down one hallway and then another, passing black steel doors fitted with square heavy paned glass windows. In one room, a man sat with his head in his hands. Was he a witness or a suspect? I wondered.
In his office, Detective Pickens offered me a chair covered in soiled, orange pleather. I sat, but only on the front half of the seat, not wanting to get too comfortable, if that was even possible. Meanwhile, he crammed his body into his desk chair and moved a stack of manila folders to another spot on his messy desk. I watched him rub the rolls of fat on the back of his neck.
“How much do you know?” he asked.
“Beth fits a profile?”
Another sigh. “The Pittsburgh PD is staking out a suspect this very moment. Beth is his type. He likes them young, tall, and pretty, okay? Blond hair. The others also went missing from PIT. One a year ago, another about six months ago. In other words, he was due to strike again. We have him profiled. Everything fits, even the time frame.”
I conjured images of the Boston Strangler, Son of Sam, and Ted Bundy. “What happened to the other girls?” I asked. “The ones who went missing from the Pittsburgh airport?”
“Found them dead. Raped, stabbed, dumped in a body of water.”
Raped. Stabbed. Dumped. I imagined Beth’s white arm, a gold bracelet dangling from her delicate wrist, buried in a clump of muddy weeds.
“Without a body or an arrest at the moment, we’re refraining from breaking this to the news.” He shook his fat finger in my face. “So no talking to your colleagues at the Chronicle, okay?”
I nodded my agreement. It made sense to me then, why Beth’s disappearance had not been splattered all over the national news like stories of other missing girls. In a tactical move, the police were withholding information from the suspect.
The detective licked his lips. “You’re a far cry from Oak Park, Ms. Rousseau. What brought you to Milwaukee this evening?”
“I went to visit Janice.”
His eyes burned through mine. I looked away.
“And?” he probed.
“It’s probably nothing.”
“Uh-huh. Then why are you here?”
I hugged my purse. “It’s probably moot now, considering this new development, but there’s something I think you should know.” I swallowed hard and searched for the right words. “Beth was, or I think there’s a chance she might have been, romantically involved with one of her professors at Tarble.” My hands spun in a circle before me, my best mime for what romantically involved meant.
Detective Pickens seemed unmoved.
“He’s married,” I added.
Still, his face was stone. “How do you think you know this?”
“I don’t, not for certain, but . . . it was in the book.” I felt small—physically and mentally—in the detective’s presence and suddenly lost all dexterity in my fingertips. To get to the book, I had to remove almost everything from my purse—cell phone, wallet, a tampon, my receipt from Starbucks, a Ziploc bag of almonds, my vitamin tin. The detective eyed the guts of my handbag as I handed A Room of One’s Own to him, open to the page in question. “Beth took notes in the margin, and from what she wrote, I think . . .” I stopped talking because I sounded ridiculous. How would I be able to convince the detective of this fact without showing him the picture I stole from Beth’s room, a picture that I had safely zipped into the inside pocket of my purse with the Reunion postcard? How would I do it without sharing my own sordid past?
Detective Pickens merely glanced at the page. Instead, he fixed his eyes on me. “Did you take this from the Richards’s home today?” His voice was harsh, accusatory.
“Actually, it was in Beth’s suitcase.”
“You mean the suitcase I retrieved from you yesterday? The one I have locked up right now in evidence?”
“It was a mistake. I took the book out when I looked through it. See, that’s how I got Beth’s phone number in the first place. From the inside front cover.”
As I watched the detective examine the inside flap, I added, “And I could have sworn I put it back in there. But somehow I didn’t, and—”
“And you decided to have yourself a little read.”
“I fully intended to return it.”
The detective sighed, revealing a bottom row of crooked, yellowed teeth. He turned the book over in his sausagelike fingers and hung it upside down, letting the pages sway back and forth, waiting for something to fall out. Nothing did. Then he flipped back to the original page. Looking down the bridge of his nose, he read with wide eyes, “ ‘Like Cassie’s Cabin.’ ” He paused, scratched his mustache. “What does that mean?”
“It’s a reference to this professor’s cabin; it belonged to his mother first.”
“Oh, of course that’s what it means.” The corners of his lips curled downward, making the distinction between the end of his chin and the beginning of his neck impossible to find. His sarcasm was thick. “Obviously.”
“Her name was Cassandra,” I explained. “But she went by Cassie.”
“And his name?”
“Mark Suter.”
Detective Pickens seemed to swipe the inside of his cheek with his tongue. He jotted something down on a scratch sheet of paper. “And how does this mean Beth had an affair with Mark Suter?”
“He told Beth about his mother’s cabin, and that’s something . . . I guess you would call it intimate? Not something he would tell just any student. Unless, you know.” I made that romantically involved circle again with my hands.
“But you know about it.” He mimicked my gesture. “So, you know.”
I shifted in my chair and the orange pleather squeaked under my jeans, mimicking the sound of passing gas. I watched a smile form at the detective’s lips for a half second then disappear.
“I just thought it was a clue,” I said into the sudden silence.
“A clue? That’s cute. Like Harriet the Spy. But every clue has an implication, Ms. Rousseau. Are you suggesting this Suter kidnapped Beth? Killed her?”
“I never said that.” My chest tightened, realizing I hadn’t thought the conversation all the way through. What was I implying? Who was I implicating? Was this about finding Beth or satiating my own curiosity?
I reached into my purse then and grabbed the Tarble postcard. “I also found this in the book. Maybe Beth was still seeing him. She went to Tarble a lot over the summer, Janice said.” I pointed to the dates listed on the card. “Maybe she was planning to see him this weekend.”
The detective barely looked at the card; he stared instead at my purse. “Is there a bottom to that bag?” he asked. “What else you got in there?”
The photo. If I showed it to him, he’d see the proof, that Beth and Mark were in love with each other. Then, he’d confiscate it—just like the book and the postcard—and call it evidence. And he’d probably arrest me for petty theft.
“Nothing,” I said.
“Okay, look, you did the right thing by bringing this to my attention,” he said brusquely, his patience deflated. “But right now, the chance that Beth might have had an affair with her married professor is, as you so eloquently said earlier, moot. Because I know the Pittsburgh PD is about to arrest the man responsible for Beth’s murder. A man who was, verified by airport surveillance, at PIT when Beth’s plane landed.”
I said nothing. He coughed.
“Besides, I’ll have you know, I did my job here,” he continued. “I scoured Beth’s credit card statements, her cell phone calls, her med school e-mail, and personal e-mail. We searched her car and her bedroom. And I uncovered nothing to suggest Beth Richards was having an affair with a married man or anyone else for that matter. There were no patterns or frequent phone calls.” He licked his lips. “Okay?”
“Okay.”
As I stood to leave, I watched the detective toss the book and postcard to the end of his desk, where an empty potato chip bag also sat, as if it meant nothing to his investigation. As if it meant nothing to Beth Richards.
As if it meant nothing to me.