Josh rested his cheek against Mira’s hair. He was glad she’d dozed off without questioning his reasons for coming to her or trying to talk about their problems. He couldn’t deal with any of those issues. The jumble of emotions rolling through him had left him shaky. Or maybe loving Mira had made him lightheaded.
He felt drunk on her taste. Crazy but true. He swore he’d gotten as much enjoyment out of the act as she had. Oral sex had never been as completely satisfying with any other woman. Only Mira. Her every breathy moan and whimper amplified the need to please her. And when she came…ecstasy.
He pressed a kiss to the top of her head and eased back to take in the image she made. A flush gave her exposed skin a soft glow. The black hair he loved with its patches of color like a collage of fall foliage fanned out around her face.
She was strength and softness all wrapped up in one decadent package. Shy and sexy, confident and vulnerable. She was everything a woman should be. He wanted to wrap his arms around her, lock her to his side, and snarl at anyone who dared come near her. Possessiveness grew, stronger than ever. The thought unsettled him.
Already, he was obsessed with Mira, but the heightened sense of ownership entering his head shocked him. He felt like a shifter ready to fight in order to keep what belonged to him—Mira.
At the moment, it wouldn’t take much to convince him to rip Aron’s or any other male’s throat out if they so much as looked at Mira with lust in their eyes. That bothered him on so many levels, but what worried him most was the flaring of the itch along his skin that accompanied the primal thoughts.
He buried his nose in the fall of Mira’s hair and breathed deeply until the tightness in his muscles and the ache in his bones eased. For whatever reason, Mira stopped the odd ailments. With the lure of her soft curves so close, he didn’t want to question why.
He’d accomplished what he’d come here for—reminded her of what he could do to her. It wasn’t enough. With his favorite obsession spread before him, he wanted to love her, show her with his body what he knew he couldn’t express. She was his one. No other woman would take her place in his heart or his life.
No matter what happened between them, she’d always have his love—this lifetime, the next, the one after that—but he didn’t want to lose her. He wanted to…
Mate her. Claim her. Keep her.
The urges echoed in his head, not in words. The need ran deeper. There was a primal edge to it he couldn’t explain. He swore he was developing an alternate personality, one that based its thoughts on a primitive level. It amplified his possessiveness, gave him images of what he wanted to do with this woman. And he had to admit, he liked what his alter ego showed him.
He kicked off his boots, the loud thumps not waking Mira. With a tug, he yanked his belt free. He tossed it aside and unbuttoned his jeans, but didn’t unzip them. He wanted Mira to peel his pants off him. She had to willingly accept his body and his claim.
He had to be her choice.
His shirt tore in his haste to remove it. No matter, he had others. The bed dipped under his weight. He crawled toward her and gave in to his yearning. He pillowed his head on her stomach. A deep breath brought her scent to him. He moaned, lust seizing him. Her fragrance was stronger than it had been the last time he’d seen her—rich, alluring, and full of life.
She smelled almost…ripe. It was an odd description, but it made him want to spill his seed inside her. Get her with child. His breathing quickened as he imagined how very sexy Mira would look swollen with a baby. His babies, three adorable little ones as in the dream he’d had.
He was spending too much time with the shifters. He’d spent his adulthood cringing at the thought of accidently knocking up his lovers. He’d never gotten close to a woman’s sex without a condom on, afraid his little swimmers would find their way home. No way did he want a tie to any of the women who’d hopped in and out of his bed. But Mira? Anticipation and excitement left him on edge.
Was it the knowledge he couldn’t impregnate her that had him so excited? Or the desire to prove the world wrong? He wasn’t so sure. He only knew he wouldn’t walk away from Mira today unless she tossed him out.
Fingers massaged his scalp.
The knowledge that Mira had reached for him upon waking pleased him, swelling his chest. He had no clue why such a simple thing as Mira running her fingers through his hair would make him feel as though he were a king of something, but there was no denying the sentiment. Each circling pass of her fingertips spread contentment through him.
Peace. That was what he felt. Like he died and went to Heaven.
“Josh.”
The breathless way she whispered his name amplified his thoughts and intensified his lust. He needed to be with Mira. The drive was too powerful to ignore, even for another minute.
He straddled her, covering her body with his. With his hands cupping her cheeks, he stared into her eyes—those kaleidoscope eyes that had ensnared him from the moment he’d first looked into them.
“Mira, my kitten. You are beautiful. So very beautiful.”
The swirling yellow spread over the white part of her eyes. He’d never seen them change that way. Was it because she too was overcome by desire? Was it a sign she was ready to make love to him? The lack of knowledge frustrated him, but it wasn’t as if the ins and outs of loving shifters came up in normal conversation. He wished he’d talked to one of the other males about what to expect. Then again, they likely wouldn’t have told him because he wasn’t supposed to be in Mira’s bed.
She swept the tip of her pink tongue across her upper lip. Her scent—spicy, sweet, and full of life—filled his lungs. He leaned closer, inhaled deeply, and moaned as her scent became a part of him.
“I want you, kitten. Tell me you want me, too. That you want us.”
“I do.” She pressed her lips to his. “Goddesses, I do. I want you. No one else.”
Those were the words he’d waited his entire life to hear. He felt something click and unfold within him, stretching his limbs. Pain seized his chest in a tight grip that stole his breath. Mira ran her fingertips across his back. The burning in his veins faded. The agony piercing his heart stopped. Mira took it away, replacing it with lust.
“Mira, my Mira.”
“Always and forever.” She pressed her mouth to his but didn’t kiss him. Their lips rubbed as she brushed hers back and forth over his. The light touch ignited him as much as when their tongues twined and rolled.
“Always and forever,” he repeated.
He held her gaze and luxuriated in the knowledge he wasn’t alone in this crazy, all-consuming desire.
“Are you ready for more?”
“Yes, more.”
He spread his arms out to the side. “Then take me. I’m yours.”
A harsh stamp of hunger flared in her eyes. She moved, all sinuous grace, and knelt in front of him. “One time, Josh. That’s all I can give you.”
No. One time would never be enough.
Flashes of images skipped across his mind. Him and Mira, twined together in positions he’d never attempted with a woman, a look of rapture stamped on her face. Mira pressed against a tree, him with claws embedded into the trunk over her head. Another with her on her knees, his fangs hovering over the bite on her shoulder.
He froze, chilled by the images. They weren’t right.
Mate her. Claim her. Keep her.
The conviction echoed in his head. Not words, the deep instinct he felt belonged to him yet it wasn’t his. He felt fragmented, as if his soul wasn’t his own.
What was wrong with him?
He swept his tongue across his teeth. Flat. No fangs. Disappointment rushed up. He shoved it away. Only a fool would let a little frustration destroy his time with the woman he wanted above all others. And he wasn’t a fool. He grabbed life as it came and enjoyed every minute of it.
She tilted her head to the side to peek at him from under her lashes. “Did you hear me, Josh? One night is all I can give you.”
He heard the goodbye. She’d always want him, but this was it, just as she’d said. She’d leave him after today and take another man to her bed, love his body the way she would Josh’s.
No. She was his. His true mate.
Instincts guided him. He loved Mira, allowing his new alter ego to rule. It was safer. He didn’t want to talk. The words on the tip of his tongue were ones he’d never uttered to a lover before. They were real, true, and a reflection of his devotion. Yet, he wasn’t convinced telling them to Mira was wise. Silence was best, but the feeling that dragged those words up filled the ache in his chest. No longer did he feel fragmented. For the first time in his life, he felt whole.