Lucy and Olivia stood near the corral railing at the Circle M and watched Cash and Mattie take a few slow circles around on horseback. Mattie sat perched just in front of Cash in the saddle, helmet on, smile stretching from ear to ear.
“She’s adorable.” Olivia waved, and though Mattie looked as if she wanted to wave back, she didn’t let go of the saddle horn.
“She is,” Lucy agreed.
Cash rode over to them. “Mattie wants to go out on the ranch.”
Lucy shoved her sunglasses on top of her head. “You sure, Mattie?”
The girl nodded, lips pressed into a straight line. Serious but determined.
“Be careful with her.” When Cash leveled her a look, Lucy raised her hands. “Hey, I trust you. I just know Graham, and you’re carrying precious cargo there. Plus, I don’t want to get blamed for anything. I already saw a small scratch on her arm. I can’t imagine how much trouble I’ll be in for that.”
Mattie had been practicing lassoing with a small rope and propped-up saddle earlier. She’d also thrown rocks, dug in the dirt and jumped into a pile of hay. Her nails had enough dirt under them to fill a sandbox. She was filthy and happy and Graham was going to kill Lucy.
Olivia pushed away from the fence. “Give us a minute and we’ll ride with you.”
“Absolutely not.” Cash’s comment cut through the peaceful day.
It sounded nothing like her brother-in-law. Lucy glanced between Cash and Olivia as they had an old-fashioned Western stare down. Cash sported a don’t mess with me look that, although serious, made Lucy want to laugh. She had that tendency in uncomfortable situations.
“You guys want me to get the guns so you can have a duel?”
“Nope.” Cash gentled his tone, but the steel underneath stayed intact. “Mattie and I will be back in a bit. Why don’t you two head inside? Liv, you can rest.” With a tug on the reins, Cash and Mattie rode out of the corral.
Rest? What was going on between the two of them? “What was that about?” Lucy studied her sister’s profile. Olivia let out a strangled sound and strode toward the house. Lucy caught up to her. “Is there trouble in marriage-land?”
“No.”
“That’s good to hear. I’ve never seen him be so bossy with you. It was kind of marvelous.”
Olivia’s lips succumbed to a slight curve. “Not funny. He’s just being his typical self.”
“Meaning?”
They reached the front door, and Olivia stomped inside. She went into the kitchen, got out two glasses and filled them with water from the fridge. “Meaning he’s being overprotective.” She gave one to Lucy, then went to sit on the couch.
Lucy followed. “Since when won’t he let you ride a horse? Isn’t that a little outrageous?”
“Yep.” Olivia rested a hand on her stomach in a maternal gesture. “It is, sort of. Except he has his reasons.”
Lucy’s eyes widened and she leaned forward. “You’re not...are you...?”
Olivia nodded, glowing and fighting tears at the same time. “I’m pregnant.”
Lucy let out a whoop and grabbed her sister in a fierce hug. When she pulled back, Olivia was full-on crying, rivers of moisture running down her cheeks.
“Uh-oh. Have you turned into a crazy emotional mess?”
Another nod.
“It’s kind of great to see my big sister, who’s usually so put together, falling apart.”
“Brat.”
Lucy laughed. “Tell me everything. Is it really not okay to ride a horse when you’re pregnant? I didn’t know that.”
Love and annoyance warred on Liv’s features. “It’s not a rule or anything, but a lot of people say not to. Of course, I didn’t meet Cash until after my miscarriage, but he knows how hard it was on me. He’s turned overprotective—even more than usual. I feel like I’m under some kind of Cash-prescribed bed rest. Not that he’s gone that far. He’s just being careful, which I do appreciate even if he drives me nuts sometimes. And I guess—” Liv sighed. “He might be right, since I don’t want to do anything to harm the baby.” Smile lines framed her eyes. “But don’t you dare tell him.”
“I’m totally Team Olivia. We have the same blood running through our veins. That’s, like, impossible to trump.”
Liv’s smile grew. “I’m only a few weeks. We just figured it out. I probably won’t tell anyone but you and Janie for now. And Mom and Dad.”
“Boy or girl?”
“We won’t know that for a while.”
“Please tell me you’re going to find out.”
“I want to. I think we will.”
Lucy sat back against the couch cushions and propped her feet up on the coffee table. “Now the whole—” she deepened her voice “—‘go in and rest’ comment makes more sense.”
“That was a horrible impression of Cash. His voice is much more attractive than that.”
“While I might agree that was a bad impression, I’m going to call a gag-me offense on the other part. Yuck! I don’t need to hear any of those sentiments.”
“You’re really still a twelve-year-old girl at heart, aren’t you?”
“Pretty much.” Lucy would be offended if it weren’t so true. “I cannot believe I’m going to be an aunt! We are going to get into all sorts of trouble together.”
At Olivia’s look, Lucy wiped the humor from her face. “And by that I mean I will be a perfect role model.”
“You just might be. Watching you with Mattie is seeing you in a whole new light.”
“It is? Why?”
“You’re great with her. Almost...maternal.”
What? At twenty-four, Lucy hadn’t expected to hear that word used to describe her for a long, long time. She had no idea what to say in response to that. “Mattie’s pretty great.”
“True.” Olivia’s mouth lifted as though she knew Lucy was sidestepping the conversation. “I thought we could invite Graham over for dinner tonight since the Smiths are coming.”
That would be the social thing to do. “We should?”
Lucy was excited to hang with Jack and Janie Smith—great friends of Cash and Olivia’s. She couldn’t wait to get her hands on their newborn daughter, Abigail, and see their adorable three-year-old son, Tucker. But did they have to invite Graham?
Her sister quirked an eyebrow. “Of course. What’s with you, anyway? It’s not like you not to include the whole county. You never leave anyone out.”
True. And since she and Graham were friends, she should want him there. Lucy was fine being friends with Graham. She just wasn’t okay with losing a relationship with Mattie. And if Lucy and Graham got too close or spent too much time together and the Wellings found out, they would not be pleased. Lucy didn’t want to do anything to upset them or have them disrupt her relationship with the girl.
“I’m beginning to think you have a crush on the man.”
“What?” Lucy snapped her attention back to Olivia. “Why would you say that?”
“You’re spending an awful lot of time with his daughter, and you’re acting kind of funny about him.”
She scoffed. “Spending time with Mattie has nothing to do with Graham. She’s so serious, I just want to help her loosen up and have fun.”
Olivia stayed silent.
“Fine. I can admit the man’s attractive.” Lucy ignored her sister’s growing smile. “But attraction isn’t the same thing as a crush. I’m not going to start sending him notes or anything—Do you like me? Check yes or no. I mean, he hasn’t even pulled my pigtails.”
Her comments were met with an exasperated sigh and shaking head.
“So, what happened between you and Bodie when you moved? Are you still talking to him?”
“Sometimes.” Lucy shrugged. “There just wasn’t anything special there.”
“There never is.”
“What does that mean?”
“You never go on more than two dates with anyone—three, tops. What’s up with that? Why don’t you ever date anyone?”
“I date all the—”
“More than a few dates,” Olivia interrupted.
“I just don’t do the serious thing.”
“Why not?”
Lucy didn’t want to discuss this. “I just...don’t. Look what happened to you.”
Olivia glanced at the wedding photo of her and Cash hanging on the wall. They were standing in the back of a pickup truck, kissing. Lucy didn’t quite understand the reasoning on that one, but it did make for a great photo. Liv’s hand slid across her stomach again. “I’m pretty happy.”
“Yeah, now. But before...” Lucy didn’t want to bring up all of this.
“It was worth it to get to him. All of that junk was worth it if Cash was the end result.”
“Sap.”
“Cynic.”
“Me? A cynic? Impossible. I’m the most positive person you know. I might be the happiest person in the state of Texas.”
“Then why the ‘no serious’ thing?”
“It’s easier that way. I can love everybody, enjoy people, and I don’t have to worry about...”
“Getting hurt.”
“No! That’s not it.”
“Then explain it.”
She couldn’t. Lucy had never been able to. How could she explain what she didn’t fully understand herself? It wasn’t about getting hurt, like Liv said. It was about having fun and living life as an adventure. Taking each day as a gift and enjoying every minute.
“Have you prayed about it?”
“I pray all of the time.” Especially when things got so out of hand she finally remembered God was supposed to be in charge of her life, not her. But Lucy was working on that. Hadn’t she just made an attempt to do better this week?
“I meant about dating.”
“No, not really.” Lucy hadn’t prayed about her dating life, but then again, nothing was wrong in that area. Why bother God with it?
“All I’m saying is that sometimes we head down our own path while forgetting to ask God what His plan is. It helps to ask first, then act. Maybe what God has for you is different than what you’ve decided. What if a relationship were possible with Graham? Would you be open to it?”
Heat burned in Lucy’s chest. “That particular subject isn’t one I need to ask God about.” Unexpected frustration tightened her vocal cords. “Graham’s never going to get married again. We just had that conversation a few hours ago. There’s nothing between us now and there won’t be in the future, so I don’t have to waste any of God’s time asking about something I already know the answer to.”
“Okay.” Olivia raised the palms of her hands. “I’ll back off. I’m only trying to save you from some of the heartache Cash and I learned the hard way.”
Why did Olivia want to push Lucy into the serious relationship she’d always wanted? Why couldn’t her sister understand that they just didn’t want the same things?
Lucy shoved up from the couch. She and Liv could have a conversation like this and still be fine afterward, but right now Lucy needed some space. “If you’re pregnant, you must be starving. Do you need some grapes and cheese? To be fed like a queen? I’ll get you something.”
“I’m fine.”
“Then you should rest like Cash said. I’m going to check on Mattie.” Lucy tried not to stomp on her way to the front door. She pushed outside and headed for the barn.
That conversation with Olivia reeked like the stuff on Cash’s boots at the end of the day. Her sister was being nosy, acting as though the decisions Lucy made were a bad thing. Olivia just didn’t understand. She’d always wanted that whole true-love bit, but Lucy had just been less of a dreamer in that area. And she’d never missed it.
Only...hearing of Olivia’s pregnancy had sprouted a small seed of doubt in Lucy. Didn’t she want that one day? Babies? A husband?
Maybe.
She’d settle for a maybe. But definitely not anytime soon. Lucy knew in order to get to that point, she’d have to let someone in and go on more than three dates, like her sister had said, but she wasn’t there yet. Just...not yet.
Lucy spotted Cash and Mattie riding toward the barn and waited for them to approach.
“She did great.” Cash lifted Mattie down, and Lucy grabbed her, squeezing the girl in a hug. “I’ve got a few things to do and then I’ll head in. Where’s Liv?”
“Inside resting.” Lucy put Mattie on the ground.
Cash shifted in the saddle, face wreathing in a grin. “She told you?”
She nodded. “Congratulations, McCowboy.”
“Thanks. Did she actually listen to me about taking a nap?”
“I don’t know. She got all nosy, so I came outside to find Mattie.”
“Ah. Sister fun.” He tugged on the brim of his hat. “Okay, well, I’ll be back in a bit.”
She turned her attention to Mattie as he rode away. “So, how was it?”
“Amazing.” Mattie twirled in a circle. “It was like flying.”
“I’m glad. Were you scared?”
“Nope.”
“Brave girl.”
“Daddy probably would have been worried about me, but he didn’t need to be. I wasn’t nervous.”
Speaking of Graham, Lucy should probably check in with him and let him know things were going well. And she should invite him to dinner. She got out her phone and texted, then slipped it back into her pocket. She had to get over the weirdness she’d felt after talking to him earlier. So his in-laws didn’t love her. So he wasn’t getting married again.
So what? Unlike what her sister thought, she and Graham definitely weren’t on a path toward a relationship. A friendship? Yes. But all that other stuff, Liv was going to have to let go of.
* * *
When his phone rang, Graham set the grocery bags on the kitchen floor and checked the screen. His mom.
He answered.
“You went out on a date and didn’t tell me?”
“Mom, I didn’t go on a date.” He tucked the phone between his ear and shoulder and started putting vegetables in the fridge.
“That’s not what the Wellings said when I ran into them yesterday.”
“They saw me and Mattie with Lucy, and they assumed, Mom. That doesn’t make it real. I told them I’m not dating anyone, especially Lucy.”
“Who’s Lucy?”
Graham moved on to the next bag, sliding whole-grain crackers and snacks for Mattie into the bin he kept for packing school lunches. “She’s covering for Hollie, remember?”
“Oh, that’s right. Maybe you should ask this Lucy on a date. How old is she? What does she look like?”
She’s beautiful. And that has nothing to do with anything.
His mom continued without waiting for an answer. “I don’t even know who she is, but I like her already. I have a feeling about this, Graham—”
He groaned, not that his mother noticed. Her feelings were notorious for being overly dramatic and wrong. Graham, his dad and his sisters teased her about them all the time.
“Mom, I’m unpacking groceries. I need to go.”
“Fine. You can tell me about her when you come for lunch after church tomorrow.”
Without agreeing, Graham said goodbye and hung up. He grabbed the meat to put into the freezer. When his phone rang again, he answered without checking the caller ID. “Mom, I told you I’m not talking about this.”
“I am not your mother. I am a snort.”
It was Lucy. And she was referencing a Dr. Seuss book. His phone was a three-ring circus today. “What’s wrong? Is Mattie okay?”
“Yes, not that you’d know a thing about it. I texted you almost fifteen minutes ago and didn’t hear back. I thought maybe someone had abducted you. I figured you’d be on high phone alert in case I called about Mattie.”
“I must have missed it while I was driving home. If Mattie’s fine, what’s up? Want me to swing out and get her?”
“Actually, the Smiths are coming for dinner. Do you want to come? You can just get Mattie then.”
Surely his increased pulse rate had to do with seeing friends and nothing to do with the woman on the other end of the phone. Cash and Jack were some of his closest friends in town, though they rarely all got together. Graham could use a night of adult conversation.
“Sure. Sounds good.”
She rattled off a time, and they said goodbye. Graham hung up and spoke to the empty kitchen. “There’s nothing going on between me and Lucy, so everybody just leave me alone.”
He left the rest of the groceries to unpack later and walked into the living room, dropping onto the couch. The photo album of Brooke that Mattie constantly looked through was on the coffee table. Graham grabbed it and opened to Mattie’s favorite page. He ran a finger down the photos, sinking into the memories.
He missed her, but with each day Brooke was beginning to feel further and further away. Like a fading photo he couldn’t protect. His mom wanted him to move on. The Wellings didn’t want him to. Everyone had an opinion, making him feel like a piece of taffy stretched in every direction. But Graham could only deal with his own emotions. And he just wasn’t willing to give Brooke up.
If he had his way, he never would.