Raze. Raze’s sneering face was inches away from mine, his expression deadly. Shock flooded me. I could see my deathly, white face, my eyes wide with disbelief, reflected in his cold, black irises. The blood in my veins seemed to freeze over. A ripping pain spliced through my skull, cutting off my attempt to summon my powers. His lips twisted in a cruel smirk that made my heart clench in fear as he leaned in. Yanking my gun from my belt, he threw it over his shoulder where it hit the passage floor with a clatter.
“I was beginning to think I might not find you.”
“You...but why?” I whispered hoarsely. Then realization washed over me. Mekai had been trying to warn me. It was Raze who’d hurt him. Raze grabbed me roughly by one arm. Before I knew what was happening, before I could even struggle, he dragged me out of the tunnel into an unfamiliar cavern. The cavern was long and cold, the ground rocky, as if they hadn’t finished levelling it yet. Along one side, ran the fast moving river, the roar of the water almost deafening. My heart sank as I realized it would muffle my cries.
He pulled me along the edge of the underground river, right back to the end of the cavern, my body bumping over the uneven ground, until we were out of the light, invisible should anyone come past.
“Private, isn’t it,” Raze said causally, as if hearing my thoughts. I held his crazed gaze, my terror mounting, while my hand snuck up towards my tracker. “Oh no you don’t,” he snarled. Yanking the tracker from my neck, he threw it out of reach. Then he stood up, and my heart skipped a beat as my eyes fell on something pale and still next to me in the gloom of the cave. The Abwarzian girl’s eyes stared lifelessly at me, her hands still bound, her face twisting towards me at an unnatural angle. Her neck was snapped, her mouth stretched open; frozen in permanent horror at her fate. A dry scream stuck in my throat as comprehension hit me. “There’s my alibi, right there.” Raze followed my horrified gaze with a frightening grin. “No one will doubt you were killed by the enemy thanks to your lack of confidence. Pathetic really.” With that, he undid her shackles and threw them into the river.
“What have you done?” I choked over the lump swelling in my throat. If I hadn’t left her, he wouldn’t have... she may have lived through this ordeal. Her death was my fault. Guilt slammed into me as I constricted a sob. A sharp pain shot through the back of my head, the warm sensation of blood seeping through my hair pulling at my concentration, blurring my vision. His hard features swam in and out of focus.
“Whatever had to be done to get to you.” His grin disappeared, the deadly tone of his voice making my skin crawl.
“Why?” I whispered. The tangy scent of blood filled my nostrils as it trickled down the back of my neck. It was so hard to concentrate, let alone summon my powers, when I was trying not to lose consciousness. If I did that, he would kill me, I knew it without a doubt and the irony wasn’t missed. All along, I’d been in more danger from one of my own kind than any alien threat. I needed to keep him talking, and keep talking myself, to stay conscious.
“Ahhh the why.” Raze leaned back a little, shifting his weight as I lay uselessly at his feet. “It’s really more about who, you know?”
“I really don’t,” I retorted faintly. I fought through the pain to keep my eyes on his face.
“Oh, of course you don’t, poor little orphan,” he spat. “It would have been better for you if you died at the beginning. Then I wouldn’t have to be here now. Making things right.” Suddenly, the memory of the large, black pod following me home at the beginning of the year hit me. It must have been Raze following me, watching me fly home. A violent shudder wracked through me at the thought of him knowing where I lived, where Shay lived.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” I said as icy fear trickled down my spine. “Perhaps you should work on your communication skills.”
“You were unmistakable from the first time I saw you, you know,” Raze went on as if I hadn’t spoken. “I’ve never known anyone else but him with those eyes... identical.”
“To who?” I demanded, my voice rising in confusion. He was mad, completely and utterly mad. I had to get away from him. Someone had to come... Raze bent over me until he was inches away from my face.
“From your murdering father, Twell Anar.”
“My father? You knew him?” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. How could this disgusting freak have any connection to my father?
“I certainly did,” Raze nodded grimly. “I could never forget the man who murdered my family.”
“Murdered?” I echoed, my voice trembling. My body shook uncontrollably. I was losing a lot of blood. I could feel it pooling down my back and spreading through my shirt. Gross. I struggled to sit up a little; afraid if I didn’t I’d pass out. In response, Raze lifted a huge foot and stomped on my chest. I squealed in agony, another cracking sound telling me he’d just snapped at least two of my ribs.
“Did I say you could move?” His face was eerie calm, dead of any emotion. I couldn’t breathe let alone take directions. I took short, shallow gasps, every one filling my chest with shooting pains. A single tear trickled out of my eyes without permission. Raze bent and swiped angrily at it, knocking my face cruelly with the back of his hand. “Don’t you dare cry you brat,” he hissed. “Not after what I sacrificed for you.”
“What are you talking about you big, ugly freak?” I yelled at him, through a blur of tears. I figured it didn’t matter if I insulted him now. He was going to kill me anyway.
“My family!” His eyes burned with black hatred into mine. “Your father, my so-called friend, sacrificed my whole family over you, just a baby! My children, my wife...they all died because he chose to go and look for you first.” Raze stood up and began striding furiously back and forth. His face was red, the veins in his neck and arms standing out.
“They called you special, a gift for the future,” he sneered. “But I’d call it your downfall.”
“They knew about my powers?” I gasped, fascinated despite my terror.
“Of course they did,” Raze replied with a bitterness so deep I shivered. “He thought it was a civil duty to preserve your life, your freak DNA, no matter the cost. He decided your life was of more value than my family, my children.”
“I didn’t know...I’ve never known anything about them,” I rasped as my chest constricted. Every breath felt too short. I tried to roll onto my side but the attempt had me writhing, the pain excruciating.
“No, I guess you wouldn’t know.” Raze smiled in a way that made my skin crawl, “No mother to tell you how much she loved you. No father to tell you that you were special. And they really doted on you. At least there was some justice in that they both died too.” I flinched at his words; they hurt as much as the physical pain. But if they had doted on me, then they must have loved me, and not just my powers. The knowledge soothed me momentarily, despite the horror I was facing. Was it so wrong that I might beg this man to tell me more, this man who apparently hated me more than anything else in his miserable world?
“How did you know them?” I whispered. “Please, tell me...” I was starting to feel slightly numb, my body shuddering in little spasms as everything began to feel less real. I blinked furiously against the heaviness that was beginning to pull at my eyelids.
“Marquis and Genesis,” Raze confirmed what I’d already learned at the D.U.C. His eyes were unfocused, as if he was somewhere else. “We fought together,” Raze continued. “Watched each other’s backs, or at least I thought so until the day the Abwarzians attacked our homes. I thought Marquis was my best friend, but he made it clear where his loyalties really lay. With Genesis and you, just a small screaming brat, not even capable of love. Do you think he cared that I’d been with my partner longer? That I had three children who meant more than my own life to me?” I stared wordlessly up at him, his cruel face leering down. It was impossibly hard to envisage him capable of love at all, let alone love of a child, or a partner. “No Twell, he decided you, or your powers, were worth more than all of them.” Raze explained with a chilling lack of emotion. “He insisted we stop at your nursery first. It was a waste of time and it cost my family their lives. Your nursery was already destroyed by the time we got there. If we’d just gone to my family first I know we could have saved them.”
“You don’t know that,” I replied unhelpfully. But, I was uncertain. Had my parents really thought I was more important, really chosen my life over his children’s? The idea was too awful. I didn’t want to believe it.
“Shut up!” Raze strode calmly back over to me. “I do know, and that’s why I can’t let you live. It just wouldn’t be fair.” A chill ran up my spine that had nothing to do with the cold. He was crazy, unhinged. I’d rather be fighting an Abwarzian at this moment, than this unreasonable psychopath. How could I fight against his twisted beliefs? They were intangible, a tumour of hatred built up in his mind over moons and moons of grief and bitterness.
“How did they die?” I whispered, barely audible above the rush of the waters. I had to know now. Before I died myself.
“Trying to protect each other,” Brazin said, as he laughed coldly. “The irony in that was poetic justice I suppose. I even got the pleasure of witnessing them die, Marquis diving on top of your stupid mother to save her when the prison camp was attacked. HA! Not even their love for each other could protect them from their poisonous gases.” I didn’t understand why knowing how their lives ended affected me, but it did. They hadn’t ultimately died fighting. They had died loving each other, as if it was the most important thing in the end. It told me what sort of people they’d been, despite what they may have had to do in the war. It told me what they had truly believed in. Somehow, without knowing them, they left their imprint on me, shaping my heart in the same way.
For a moment a strange expression settled on Raze’s face. It was anguish. All these years he’d been holding onto this, grieving for his family, hating my parents and then he’d seen me. It all made sense now, the way he looked at me, treated me in training. I was the salt in his wound, rubbing myself in without even realizing it.
“How could I live with myself, or face my family in the next life, if they knew I’d let you live, when he let them die?” His expression was tortured, far away. Despite everything, I felt a small twinge of pity.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, blinking against the haze that clouded my eyes. “I’m sorry you lost them.”
“I don’t need your pity,” Raze spat. Reaching down he grabbed me by the hair, pulling me to my feet. With a shock, I realized the high keening sound filling my ears had escaped from my own lips. This was it; he was going to kill me. He pulled me against him, and I realized he intended to snap my neck. My legs shook so violently they gave out. I sagged in his arms.
“You’re no better than an Abwarzian,” I gasped. One huge hand clamped around my throat in response. Tears began to gush down my face. A deep growl rumbled up and out of Raze’s massive chest as his hand squeezed around my neck. Purple and black spots began to dance in front of my eyes as my lungs fought for air.
“One thing I have learned from fighting them all these years is how to understand them,” he whispered coldly in my ear, “They pursue justice. The only noble thing about them.” If this is what could become of my own soul through war, maybe it was better to die now. “My only regret is that I didn’t kill you sooner,” Raze hissed in my ear. Terror rippled down my spine as he braced his hands around my neck for the final twisting motion that would finish me off.
I heard a ripping sound before Raze released me with a sudden jerk. A huge gash tore through his clothing, into his shoulder, and I saw the blood beginning to seep through his uniform as something shrieking and clawing attached itself to his face. I fell to my knees, gasping for air as Raze roared in surprise. He swung wildly around, searching for the source of the attack. It was Sazika, the first tip off was her gun bobbing magically in mid-air. Then I heard her terrified gasps as she valiantly fought this crazed, giant man who could easily crush her with one hand.
“Sazika!” I screamed with the little breath I had. “Get out of here! He’ll kill you! Go!” The words were choked, strangled, but my fear for her outweighed concern for myself. Then my fears came to life. Raze yanked the gun from her invisible hands, tossing it into the river. His huge fists closed around something I couldn’t see, flinging his arms out hard. The thud of Sazika’s body hitting the side of the cavern directed me to where she was before she became visible. She flicked into view, her body crumpled and unmoving.
“No!” I sobbed, crawling across the ground towards her. Raze seized the back of my shirt, yanking me up. Screaming in fury and horror for Sazika I flailed in his grasp, clawing at his face, kicking at his shins, but my draining strength was nothing compared to his. I tried desperately to harness my powers, but once again his hand clamped around my neck, lifting me into the air. My feet kicked uselessly while my hands came to my throat, clawing frantically at his fingers. My breath squeezed from my lungs. The spots were back. I watched helplessly through them as the light seemed to fade, and my eyes began to roll back as I lost consciousness.
Suddenly Jonaz was there, exploding into my vision, running with purpose towards us. Raze’s hands released me as he screamed in pain and I fell to the ground, dragging in a great lungful of air as I fought to breathe. Jonaz’s eyes were as full of fury as Raze’s, yet they were not cold at all. Instead, they emitted heat and rage so terrifying I wrenched my eyes away, unable to bear such a chilling expression on his handsome face. Jonaz didn’t waste his energy on shouting. His features blazed with determination as he grimly and methodically went about making sure Raze was distracted enough to move away from me. Whatever it was Jonaz was doing to Raze, it seemed he had no defence, no resistance to stop him. He bellowed again in agony, turning the full force of his anger on Jonaz. With a roar, Jonaz threw himself at Raze and Raze responded, their bodies meeting with a sickening crunch that had me cringing where I lay. The sound of their battle was deadly, Raze screaming in a way that made my skin crawl. I knew that Jonaz was hurting him badly, demonstrating the full capacity of his power. It was a testament to Raze’s strength that he worked through the pain and was able to grab Jonaz by the throat.
I heard myself scream again as Raze ran Jonaz into a wall and pounded his head against the stone, intent on crushing his skull. Jonaz’s eyes rolled and he sunk to his knees as Raze bent over him. He grabbed him by the throat, dragging him onto his feet. Again, I wondered at the cries that seemed to tear from my body uncontrolled. Raze was going to kill Jonaz. I knew he wouldn’t let anything get in the way of finishing me off. My heartbeat seemed to slow, my blood turning to ice in my veins. Every bad thought I’d ever held for him was gone; anguish piercing my heart at the thought of losing him. Suddenly, I saw why he was really so desirable. It wasn’t because everyone else told me so either. It was because underneath his flawless exterior and cocky façade, he was actually someone warmer, kinder, more passionate, and honest than I’d ever dared to be. He’d risked his life to save me from this man and now he was going to be sacrificed for it.
I couldn’t let that happen. My world needed Jonaz Maven, needed his power, more than they needed mine. As long as he lived, I could accept this. I could accept my fate. After all, Raze had still given me a gift, despite the fact that he would kill me. I now knew who I was, the daughter of people who had loved each other, and loved me. I was even more than that. I was someone who knew that if I must die, it was not to obey my leaders, but for something I believed in much more. It was for Como, and all the people I loved. Finally for Jonaz, because I knew in my heart he could save more people, do more good for our world. Those things were more important than my own life.
I clambered to shaky feet, sure of what I needed to do. With the last of my strength, I focused on Raze and Jonaz. My body trembled dangerously; threatening to collapse as I threw out my hands, unleashing my powers at them. When I managed to push them apart, I saw Jonaz’s face turn to me, his eyes locking on mine in horrified understanding. My name ripped brokenly from his throat as I lifted him forcefully into the air. Holding back a sob, I threw him hard, as far as I could, into the river. The current took him fast, bearing him away from me as his shouts echoed off the rocky walls. Dimly, as I fell back down in exhaustion, I hoped the waters would bear him to safety, to anywhere else but here.
My body went cold with shock as Raze turned and looked at me. He was bloody, his clothes torn, but his lips curled into a sneer of triumph as he began to move back over to me, to pick back up from where he left off. I closed my eyes rather than look at him, I didn’t want his ugly face to be ingrained in my memory as the last image I ever saw. My body was useless, but my mind had not been crushed. I gathered the last of my energy, shuddering with the effort. With every last particle of energy I possessed I threw my powers out. Sweat dripped off my face as the ground shook, and the walls groaned. Shards of rocks began to crumble from the roof of the cavern. With all I had left in me, I pushed. Just before I thought I might pass out, the roof finally cracked, breaking apart, toppling down onto Raze.
The sight of his face, momentarily surprised, was followed by the sound of his bones crushing. His blood-curdling scream swelled inside the cavern as the rubble rained down, burying him alive. His cries rang out, over and over, echoing endlessly off the walls. The sound pierced my heart, made my soul shudder as I listened to his life being crushed out of him. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, his screams died down to pitiful whimpers, to long drawn out moans, and then nothing. I lay still, my breathing shallow, my skin icy cold.
I began to shiver uncontrollably. In one moment, it felt like a hundred images danced before my eyes. Shay. My heart twisted in anguish at what this would do to her. Would she blame herself for encouraging me to do this? She mustn’t do that; it was my choice, my own life I’d decided to offer. I didn’t regret it, no, not even now that I was about to die before it even began. Meela and Dash, oh, I would never hear their bright laugher again, see their wild grins as we teased and taunted each other. An image of Chaz flashed before me, his kind eyes warm with life the way I wanted to remember him. I hoped I would see him in the heavens, or another life, along with the others who had already fallen in this war. My final vision was the most confusing, Jonaz, dark and strong, his face terrifyingly beautiful. It was so real it was like he was standing right in front of me.
A guttural cry broke through my consciousness. My eyes fluttered open with effort to find Jonaz, his arms stretching down to me. Was he really here, leaning over me? His eyes flashed with fear, his expression so devastated that a thrill of something unfamiliar trickled down my spine. I stared up at him through blurred eyes, and became aware it was real. Jonaz crouched over me, icy water dripping from his skin onto mine. His warm breath blew over me as his hands cupped my face.
“Twell, I want you to keep your eyes closed for me okay?” His voice was grim, and I nodded weakly in response. I had no desire to see Raze’s body; my nightmares were going to be vivid enough as it was. I’d also never, ever, been so glad to hear Jonaz’s voice in my life. I felt my body leaving the ground as he lifted me easily in his arms, taking me away from Raze’s body. Every jolt of his steps from the cavern was agony. I tried not to cry out but I couldn’t fight the pain any longer, gasping sharply despite the fact he was carrying me so carefully, cradling me tightly against his chest. It was so strange how safe I felt now, in the arms of this boy I’d fought against for so long.
“It’s okay Twell. You’re safe,” Jonaz whispered through my thoughts as he entered the tunnel. Lowering me carefully back down to the ground, his hands left me momentarily, crushing against the pendent around his neck. Faintly, I heard the sound of yelling somewhere close, panicked voices, the pounding of running feet.
“The others! Mekai? Sazika?” Sudden terror washed over me again.
“They’re okay, I found Mekai. He tipped me off about Raze. The others just found Sazika, and they’re both being transported out now,” Jonaz assured me. His hands returned, tenderly brushing my hair back. I opened my eyes a crack to find his face hovering over mine, his eyes so full of emotion that my heart contracted painfully inside my broken ribcage.
“Twell...” he groaned, his voice breaking roughly. He lifted my head to cradle it in his lap then gasped in horror as his hands came away sticky with my blood. A deep moan of anger escaped his throat again, his face contorting in fury. “I wondered why he looked at you the way he did, but I thought he was just a creep...and I did nothing...” His voice was strangled, hoarse. I sighed in answer, too tired for words, too tired to keep my eyes open. “Twell no!” Jonaz shook me once, in warning, “You can’t go to sleep, just stay with me for a few more moments, you need to let me heal you, okay Twell?”
“K...” I mumbled, aware of the irony in him finally requesting to touch me, now of all times. But it was so hard to stay with him. I was so tired. Jonaz cupped my head with one hand and I felt immediate warmth spread over my scalp. The heat felt wonderful against the increasing cold and numbness spreading through my body. His other hand gently probed my arms, my torso, looking for other injury. He inhaled sharply when he came across my ribs. I moaned at his touch.
“I should have killed him myself.” His voice was ice, acerbic between his teeth.
“Haven’t you learned anything about trying to rescue me?” I struggled to add the usual level of irritation to my tone.
“I know, I know, you don’t need to be rescued.” I didn’t care this time that his voice was totally unapologetic. Vaguely I heard my shirt tearing, then the sensation of his warm hand pressing against my broken ribs. My eyes slipped shut again of their own accord as I felt the heat flow through his hand into me. It hurt, the feeling of his powers repairing my body, my bones knitting back together, but I was too exhausted now to even cry out. “Hey,” Jonaz growled, shaking me slightly. “Open your eyes Twell.” But I couldn’t open them. They wouldn’t open. He shook me almost roughly, but I didn’t care anymore. “Twell!” he shouted in alarm. It sounded muffled, far away. “Hold on!” Now he was begging me, “Please Twell, just hold on a little longer...” But I couldn’t hold on. I didn’t know how. I slipped away to the sound of Jonaz still pleading my name, a tortured cry in the dark.