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Gathered beneath the sculpted palm trees of Jamie’s well manicured front yard, we lounged in garden chairs and drank red wine while we watched our kids zip around Kingston Court’s private streets on skateboards and trikes. It was one of those particularly ideal Southern California evenings. The sunset painted pink and purple watercolor splashes across the waning sky. The temperature hovered around seventy degrees.
I may have been persona non-grata as far as my husband and oldest daughter were concerned, but my girlfriends in the neighborhood still fawned over me like a celebrity. They kept an eye on my kids when they ventured outside, complimented the fresh flowers blooming in my garden, and made sure I joined them every Thursday for drinks in the cul-de-sac.
Natalie Delisse, a mousey stay-at-home mom who bought a house right next door to her very best friend from college, rarely missed a night. She was one of those “perfect” moms. The type who made a big deal about volunteering three days a week at the elementary school and hand painted obnoxious sun-shiny signs for her children’s lemonade stands. She never really added much to any conversation, but this evening was different. Natalie and her bestie Jamie droned on and on about Natalie’s husband. We spent at least half an hour discussing their car crash and Mark’s recovery process. I felt awful for both of them, but I was also a little freaked out about the whole thing and ready to talk about something else.
The other women got sucked into it all. Their mouths gaped open and their eyes stayed wide with the look of horror and fear that it could happen to any of us. I chose to zone out and listen for the crash of the waves from the nearby ocean, to breathe in the salty air. It was important to keep centered.
I was patting out a drop of spilled wine on my expensive boho ivory shift dress when Marina, the queen of gossip, sauntered over smiling like a woman who just scored the best deal of her life at the Nordstrom’s Anniversary Sale. Eyeing her with great interest, I decided if Marina told us something good, I might consider forgiving her for what I overheard her whispering about Cameron and me the other day, about us getting into an argument over Sophia in the driveway. Marina knew everything that went on within a ten mile radius. It was best to play nice with her.
Marina pushed her feral blond ringlets off her face as the ladies greeted her. She grinned even wider, every line on her forehead begging for Botox. Now I knew she had something juicy to tell us.
“Has anyone seen Nora lately? I heard she left, but that can’t be true, can it?”
Beth, one of our nerdy neighbors who loved hanging out with us, cleared her throat and looked around for our reaction. Her tan shorts bulged in the butt and thighs, and I watched in irritation as she pulled her thick white sports socks higher up her calf. She looked more like a lesbian soccer coach than a stay-at-home mom living in a wealthy beachside community.
“I noticed she isn’t around much,” I volunteered, eager to cut Beth off before she said something stupid and steered the conversation away from Marina’s gossip.
Jess, my closest friend on Kingston Court, threw in her two cents. “I haven’t seen Nora either, now that you mention it.” She stuck out her lower lip in a dramatic pout. “Poor Jason is out almost every evening pulling their kids around in that little red wagon. He looks exhausted.”
Beth bobbed her head up and down in wild agreement like she had some sort of social disorder. “Jason loves those kids. They are so adorable.”
Jason Ellis toted his two little children around the neighborhood like he actually enjoyed it. Nora, his ball busting wife with Ivy League credentials, brought home the big bucks. She went off to work and Jason did everything else. Their whole relationship felt tragic. How could a wife respect a man who changed diapers all day long? It just wasn’t sexy.
I was preparing to tell Marina to spill it when I noticed Natalie averting her puppy dog brown eyes to the ground. She was friends with Nora and by the look of tension pinching her forehead and tightening her jawline, I was certain she knew something.
Swirling the blood-red liquid in my glass, I raised an eyebrow at her. “Seems like someone has some information they’d like to share.” I smiled.
Marina jumped right in. “Well, I heard Nora left a note.” She paused for added drama. “Packed her bags while the rest of the family was out for the day and disappeared. She typed up a letter on Jason’s laptop saying she needed some time off. Can you imagine?”
The other ladies gasped. Jess spoke first, her soft pink lips parted in shock. “She left her children?”
“Yep,” Marina confirmed. “Left them with Jason and not even a phone call since.”
“Guess it doesn’t pay to be a house husband,” I heard myself say out loud. It was catty and mean spirited. Worst of all, it made me a hypocrite. Jason’s plight could be my own story if I didn’t play my cards right. For all I knew, Cameron was hunched over somewhere writing me a goodbye note right this second, preparing to leave me behind to raise our children on my own.
I nudged Marina for more details. “Why did she leave him? Did the note say anything else?”
Natalie cleared her throat and sat up straighter. The move added a couple of inches to her tiny five-foot-nothing frame. From her seated position, she could actually stare me down from eye level. “Nora said she was going to Guam. She’s staying with her family there. She needed some time to think.” Natalie pursed her lips before continuing. “Nora left Jason with full control of her trust fund. She didn’t abandon her children. She just needed a break. Motherhood isn’t for everyone.” Natalie raised her glass to her mouth and took a sip, glaring at me as if to say, “Conversation over.”
Well it wasn’t over for me. Not by a long shot. I didn’t give a damn if Nora left her family millions, she still abandoned them. “Leaving them a blank check doesn’t excuse her behavior. It doesn’t erase the pain she’s inflicting on Grace and little what’s-his-name.” Nora’s disappearance felt personal, as if I was the one being left behind.
“Their names are Grace and Andrew. No one is perfect, Samantha.” Natalie shot back, her eyes focused on the sidewalk.
Heat spread across my neck. I wanted to scream. Natalie reminded me of the quintessentially goodygood girl-next-door who saw the best in everyone.
She just didn’t get it. Life was black and white. No in-between. Natalie’s insistence on seeing everything in fifty shades of gray pissed me off. A parent should not abandon their children. No exceptions.
“Perfect? No one is perfect?” I tucked a stray hair behind my ear and fought to maintain my civility in front of our friends, especially considering Natalie’s own recent tragedy. “On what planet is tossing aside your spouse and children a minor faux pas? I suppose it was an accident. She’ll be back next week with an apology? Oops, so sorry about that. I didn’t mean to treat my family like yesterday’s garbage. I really do love you and want to dedicate my life to you. Give me a break.”
“It doesn’t mean she doesn’t love them,” Natalie said in a lowered, steady voice.
“It means she doesn’t love them enough.”
Natalie stared hard at the ground, probably too intimidated to make direct eye contact. “I think this is none of our business. Shit happens. Nora left Grace and Andrew in the care of their fully capable father and she gave them her life’s savings. Who are you to judge?”
All my friends besides clueless Beth shifted their body weight in my direction, an obvious sign of their allegiance.
“Of course I can have an opinion. These are our neighbors. Their children play with our children. You don’t think this will affect us all?” I turned to Beth. “Do you feel safe with your only daughter playing with Nora’s kids? How would Liora feel if she knew you could leave her?”
Jamie, Natalie’s only true ally, sneered at me. “You better watch it, Samantha.”
I stared back at her, daring her to take it a step further.
“I hear Shelby crying inside.” Jamie’s nostrils flared ever so slightly. “Natalie, will you help me check on her?”
Graced with porcelain skin and Kewpie doll bow shaped lips, Jamie, with her peroxide blonde hair, was the only woman in the neighborhood who came close to matching my good looks. I couldn’t stand her.
“Sure,” Natalie agreed with her bff, still staring at her own feet, incapable of looking me directly in the eye. “I could use a breather.” She stood and snuck away through Jamie’s mahogany front door.
My chest burned in anger. I glared at Jamie’s empty porch, laced with pink bougainvillea and perfectly placed bright potted plants. Kingston Court only gave the appearance of tranquility, the truth was not so pretty. What was Natalie thinking? How could anyone defend such inexcusable behavior?
Jess giggled. Her overly augmented boobs threatened to break free from her sundress. Did she really need that much attention?
“Wow,” Jess said, oblivious to me eying up her silicon stuffed chest. “Someone was a little overprotective. Jeez, a mom flies off to Guam, and we’re all okay with that?”
“Soars off to a foreign country with nothing more than a note saying she may or may not be back,” I added, happy for the support.
The ladies and I continued our drinking and conversation until the moon shined as bright as the streetlights and our children were actually begging to go inside. Walking back to our respective homes, a pang of guilt stabbed at me, making me feel the need to apologize for my outburst with Natalie. She wasn’t such a bad person. I actually kind of respected her instinct to protect a friend.
All the same, her story struck a real nerve. Mark’s car crash and Nora’s fly-by-night escape left me feeling even more vulnerable than I had before. I refused to be the next person in the neighborhood to find herself alone.