On the morning of her wedding, Kate found herself in a hot sweat.
Her Thursday had been stressful, to say the least. She had finalized the seating arrangement, collected her dress, paid the band their deposit, arranged a time for the vintage wedding car to be collected, confirmed the time of the cake delivery, gotten a manicure, arranged for flowers to be delivered to the church, dropped off place cards to the venue, packed an emergency kit for anything that might go wrong and arranged the rings.
But it was now Friday morning and she had spent the entire night tossing and turning in the bed alone. Norman had gone to stay at his family home to keep up with the tradition of the groom not being allowed to see the bride the morning of the wedding. But even after a full sleepless night, she still hadn’t written her vows for Norman. She was right back at square one with no idea what she was going to say at the altar. She had gotten up several times during the night and stared at the blank page.
She couldn’t think of a thing.
Because when Kate was left alone with her thoughts, she found herself tormented by a longing for Trevor. And the source of that torment was coming from within her closet. The locket was calling out to her, demanding to be opened. She finally had the key after all these years, but opening it could possibly make her feel infinitely worse than she already did. She had no idea what was inside, and she had to keep it that way.
She had gotten through the whole night without opening it. She could get through the day too. She just had to stay focused. At this point the girls would already be on their way. And an hour later, her mother would be arriving with the photographer. It was time to be the person everyone needed her to be. She knew she was reverting back to her people-pleasing persona but what choice did she have? She couldn’t let everyone down. She had to snap into character.
She needed to become the bride.
This was supposed to be the happiest day of her life, for God’s sake. No, not supposed to be, Kate tried to convince herself.
It was going to be.
She showered, washed and conditioned her hair, shaved her legs and moisturized her body. As she slipped into her bathrobe, however, Kate turned her head towards her walk-in closet. The locket was calling out to her once more. As if she was in some kind of trance, she opened the closet door, like Sleeping Beauty wandering towards the cursed spindle. Against her best judgement, she grabbed her J-1 memory box and brought it to her bed. She whipped off the lid and saw it. Such a small innocent thing, with such destructive emotional power. But as she took the locket in her hand, the doorbell suddenly rang.
The girls were here.
Perfect. That would distract her from self-sabotage. They would help her get into character and become Mrs Cox. She left the locket on the bed and headed down the stairs.
‘AAAHHHHH,’ the girls screamed when Kate opened the door. They were already fully made up in their bridesmaids dresses and they all looked stunning. The dresses were a gorgeous shade of lavender. They were all technically the same dress, but each had a unique style. Chloe’s was an asymmetrical one-shoulder neckline, Natalie’s was a halter neck and Siobhan’s, as one might expect, was strapless.
‘Girls, you all look gorgeous,’ Kate said, letting them in.
‘Well, it’s our job to make you look even better than the three of us combined,’ Chloe said, holding up her makeup bag. She was ready to get to work.
‘I can’t believe the big day is finally here,’ Natalie said.
‘Neither can I,’ Kate said. ‘I feel like I have a million things to do.’
‘As if you don’t have every single thing planned minute by minute,’ Siobhan laughed. ‘You probably even have our toilet breaks rostered.’
‘Kate, you look a bit tired,’ Natalie said. ‘Did you sleep okay?’
‘Not really. Just so excited,’ Kate said, trying to convince herself.
‘Don’t worry, I can hide the bags under your eyes,’ Chloe said.
‘My hair is shampooed and conditioned, I just need you to blow-dry and curl it. Then we’ll move on to the makeup.’
‘Perfect! I’ll get set up.’
‘My mam will be here in about an hour. She’s coming with my cousin, Niall. He’s the photographer,’ Kate explained.
‘A photographer, you say?’ Chloe said. ‘Is he single?’
‘He’s twenty-one.’
‘Ugh, a foetus,’ Chloe said, disappointed.
‘I’ll set up some nice backdrops for the photos and find the best lighting,’ Natalie said.
‘And I’ll get started on the Prosecco,’ Siobhan laughed.
‘Nice try, Siobhan – you’re getting my dress ready.’
‘What do I look like? Your maid?’
‘You’re literally the bride’s maid, yes. Now chop chop!’
After about forty-five minutes, Kate’s auburn hair was done to perfection. She wore it half up and half down, with loose curls flowing and the rest clipped up. Her makeup was almost finished too, and she was dying to see the result.
‘Kate, you look stunning!’ Chloe said, applying the final touches.
‘Can I see?’
‘Not yet, I’m almost done. You just need some mascara.’
‘The dress is ready for you by the way,’ Siobhan said. ‘But it tore a bit when I tried it on.’
‘WHAT?’ Kate snapped.
‘I’m joking,’ Siobhan laughed.
‘Girls, please no unnecessary heart attacks today. I’m already stressed enough as it is.’
‘I have some areas set up for photos,’ Natalie said.
‘Lickarse,’ Siobhan muttered.
‘Honestly, girls, thank you all so much. I don’t know what I’d do without you,’ Kate smiled.
‘I’m honestly shocked we’re still alive after the hen party,’ Siobhan laughed.
Kate’s feathers were immediately ruffled. ‘I thought we agreed to never mention the hen party ever again,’ she said, unimpressed.
‘Oh come on, we can talk about it when it’s just us.’
‘No, Siobhan, we take it to our grave. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas, remember?’
‘Tell that to Chloe’s tattoo,’ Siobhan laughed.
‘I’m getting it removed in two weeks. It’s costing me two grand!’ Chloe sighed. ‘But at least my sunburn has calmed down.’
‘And at least Nat got those massive fake eyebrows off her face.’
Natalie lifted up her bangs to reveal her new feminine eyebrows. ‘I bought proper fake ones for women while my real ones grow back,’ she said. ‘Too bad Charlie will never see what I look like with real eyebrows. I never even got her number.’
‘I know how you feel, Nat,’ Siobhan said. ‘But even though Officer Byrne doesn’t want me, I know one day, he will. And when that day comes, I’ll be ready to hang up my whore boots.’
‘Well, that’s some character development, I suppose,’ Natalie laughed.
‘And I downloaded Instagram again!’ Chloe said, as if it was some kind of breakthrough.
‘I thought you were on the verge of a breakdown from everyone calling you Piss Girl?’
‘I was. But I’m taking a break from my mental health to focus on social media. I have a following now, and everyone loves a comeback.’
‘You should reach out to Pampers for a brand deal,’ Siobhan laughed.
‘Hey, a win is a win,’ Chloe shrugged.
‘You see, Kate? It’s good to look back and laugh at it all.’
‘Okay, but that’s enough about the hen party, girls,’ Kate insisted. She couldn’t let her mind wander to Trevor. She had to stay focused.
‘Your mascara is done,’ Chloe said, standing back to look at her.
‘Can I please see now?’
‘Put the dress on first! You need to have that BAM moment where you see yourself.’
‘Okay, help me get into it,’ Kate said, getting up.
Kate got into the dress and the girls pulled it up on her. It was exquisite, yet simple in its design. It was understated but still elegant enough to make a dramatic entrance. It was her big day after all, and wearing the perfect white dress was integral to that. The girls zipped up the dress and began to pull out the bottom of it, for the full effect.
‘Okay, now you can look,’ Chloe said.
Kate turned around and was mesmerized by the image in the mirror. She did look like a princess, there was no denying that. The problem was, she didn’t feel like one. She felt like a fraud.
It was as if she was playing a role. The Happy Bride. A role she didn’t want to be cast in any more, despite waiting her entire life for her curtain call. How could she have planned for this moment since she was a little girl, only for it to turn out completely wrong?
It didn’t make any sense.
‘Is everything okay, Kate?’ Chloe asked, sensing something wasn’t quite right.
‘Yes . . . of course. Everything is perfect. The hair is perfect. The makeup is perfect. The dress is perfect. How could anything not be okay?’
‘So why aren’t you smiling?’ Natalie asked.
She couldn’t hold it back any more.
The dam broke and a river of tears began to flow.
‘Oh my God, no, no, no, the makeup!’ Chloe panicked.
‘Forget the stupid makeup,’ Natalie said. ‘Kate, tell us what’s wrong. We’re here.’
‘It’s just . . . I spent all last night trying to write my vows to Norman and I’m completely blank. I can’t think of a single thing to say!’ Kate said, panicked.
‘Just speak from your heart,’ Natalie said. ‘The words will just come to you naturally.’
‘Of course. Anything you say will come off as sweet and sophisticated. You’re just too in your head about it,’ Chloe explained.
‘Yeah . . . yeah, you’re right.’
Siobhan was audibly silent.
‘Have you something to say, Siobhan?’ Kate asked.
‘No . . .’ Siobhan said, trying to keep her words in. ‘I mean . . . if you have nothing nice to say, you shouldn’t say anything, right?’
‘Oh, spit it out already!’ Kate snapped.
‘Don’t you think going blank on your vows is a sign?’
‘A sign of what?’
‘Sweet Jesus, you’re dense,’ Siobhan said. ‘A sign that you’re not in love with Norman!’
‘That’s not relevant! It’s going to be the happiest day of my life. Everything is planned to perfection!’
‘Oh don’t start, Bridezilla!’
‘I’m allowed to be a Bridezilla, it’s my day!’
‘Well call me Queen Kong because I’ve had enough of your bullshit!’
‘What bullshit?’
‘YOU’RE STILL IN LOVE WITH TREVOR!’
‘Don’t say his name!’
‘He’s not fucking Voldemort, Kate!’
‘He might look like Voldemort in a few years if he keeps doing coke,’ Natalie said.
‘Trevor doesn’t do coke, Nat! That necklace wasn’t a cocaine key, it was the key to the fucking locket and he gave it to me after he signed the annulment and I stupidly brought it home and now I’m losing my mind because I’ve been up all night trying to stop myself from opening it!’ Kate said, all in one breath. She hadn’t meant to say all that, it had just come out.
Naturally, the girls were gobsmacked.
‘WHAT?’ Chloe said.
‘Where’s the locket?’ Siobhan said.
‘It’s on my bed, but—’
Before Kate could finish her sentence, Siobhan was running up the stairs to the bedroom.
‘But girls, what difference will opening it even make? Trevor is gone. He wants nothing to do with me. I should just throw it away and forget about him.’
‘But you said it kept you up all night. Are you going to be an insomniac for the rest of your life over a locket?’ Natalie asked.
‘Well . . . that’s a good point.’
‘Maybe it’s the final part of your closure,’ Chloe said. ‘Maybe once it’s open, you can move on and marry Norman without any loose ends.’
They were making sense. Was she going to be tormented by it for the rest of her life? That would be crazy, wouldn’t it? Perhaps even crazier than opening a locket from her ex on her wedding day.
No, she reminded herself, it was Pandora’s box. Nothing good could come out of it. It was an atom bomb. Detonating it on her wedding day would be an act of self-annihilation.
‘Found it,’ Siobhan said, walking down the stairs with the locket in her hand.
‘No, girls, we can’t open it,’ Kate said firmly. ‘That’s my final decision.’
‘Okay, then I’m flushing it down the toilet.’
‘WHAT?’
‘Well, you either have to open it or flush it. You can’t just keep it locked. It’ll torture you for ever.’
‘Fine, flush it. See if I care,’ Kate said, folding her arms. Trevor was the past, Norman was the future, she reminded herself. A locket didn’t change that.
Siobhan walked into the downstairs bathroom and held it over the toilet bowl. ‘I’M ABOUT TO FLUSH IT!’ she shouted out to Kate.
‘I DON’T EVEN CARE!’
Then, the sound.
The torturous sound of the toilet flushing and the regret that came with it. It was only then that she realized how much she needed to open it.
‘STOP!’ Kate roared as she rushed to the bathroom. She went flying in and looked into the toilet bowl that was just about to finish flushing.
‘NOOOOOO!’ Kate screamed when she saw the bowl was empty. It felt like the biggest mistake she had ever made. She would spend the rest of her life tormented by what was inside that locket.
But when she turned around, she felt the greatest relief of her life.
‘I obviously didn’t flush it, you stupid bitch,’ Siobhan smiled as she dangled the locket in her hand.
‘I thought we said NO MORE HEART ATTACKS?’
‘Shut up and get the key,’ Siobhan laughed.
‘Change of heart?’ Natalie said as the two walked out of the bathroom.
‘Okay girls, here’s the plan . . .’ Kate began.
‘Kate, we love you to bits but if you say the word “plan” one more time, I’m going to knock you out with a box,’ Siobhan said, only half joking. ‘Now open that fucking locket!’
Kate reached into her handbag and took out the key Trevor had given her, on the necklace he had worn around his neck on their dates.
‘So it definitely wasn’t a cocaine necklace?’ Natalie asked.
‘No, Nat, it wasn’t,’ Kate said, unimpressed. ‘You jumped to the total wrong conclusion.’
‘Well, that’s just the pot calling the kettle black now, isn’t it?’
Kate took a deep breath and braced herself for what was about to happen. With the key in one hand and the locket in the other, it was time to end nine years of wondering.
‘Moment of truth,’ she said.
Kate put the key into the locket’s hole and Siobhan made an orgasmic moan.
‘Not now, Siobhan, this is serious!’
‘Sorry, I hate tense moments!’
Kate collected herself and twisted the key.
The locket opened.
The girls all gasped at once. It was far beyond anything she had ever imagined could have been inside. It quite literally took her breath away.
In her hand was the most stunning, ornate diamond engagement ring Kate had ever seen.
Not just any ring.
‘His grandmother’s ring,’ Kate cried. She took it in her hand and the mascara started flowing.
‘Oh my God, makeup emergency. Makeup emergency,’ Chloe panicked, running to her bag.
‘I’m confused. What does this mean?’ Natalie said.
‘He gave me this locket at the end of our summer together. He told me that when I came back the following summer, he would give me the key!’
‘Which means he was going to ask you to marry him,’ Siobhan said, in shock.
‘And you never went back to him!’ Natalie said. ‘Oh my God, now I’m going to cry.’
Chloe came rushing over and started to pat the tears off Kate’s face. ‘Nobody else cry or I’m going to start crying!’ she demanded.
‘I ruined his romantic gesture because I never gave him the chance to propose. If I went back, I would have been able to get a visa and we could have spent the last nine years making music together. I used to think Trevor ruined my life. I ruined it my fucking self!’ Kate cried.
‘The ring looks like it’s worth a fortune!’ Siobhan said, looking at it closer.
‘It’s priceless. It’s been in his family for generations. And it’s been in my closet for the past nine years,’ Kate said, bawling.
‘No, no, no, the makeup is falling apart! Could you cry on the inside?’ Chloe begged.
‘This is a disaster! Why the hell did you make me open it?’ Kate yelled.
‘Eh, hello? Are you saying we should have flushed a priceless engagement ring down the toilet?’ Siobhan said.
‘It would have been better to never know what was inside!’ Kate said, tears rolling down her face.
‘Inside tears, inside tears,’ Chloe continued.
‘What the hell am I supposed to do now?’
The doorbell rang and the girls were suddenly frozen in shock.
‘Shit!’ Kate panicked. ‘It’s my mother and the photographer!’
‘You can’t take photos looking like this!’ Chloe said. ‘I need to reapply!’
‘What should we tell them?’ Siobhan asked.
‘My mother will know what’s wrong as soon as she sees me!’
‘Will I stall them?’ Natalie asked, going to the door.
‘There’s no point,’ Kate said, helplessly. ‘Open it.’
Natalie opened the door to reveal Kate’s stern-faced mother.
Margaret walked inside, proudly wearing a flamboyant yet elegant hat, as was tradition for the mother of the bride. Niall, the photographer, walked in behind her. But when Margaret saw her daughter’s puffy eyes and running mascara, she immediately had a conniption.
‘Sweet suffering Christ on the cross!’ Margaret snapped. ‘What in the name of God is going on in here?’
‘It’s kind of a long story,’ Siobhan said.
‘Well, we don’t exactly have time for a long story, do we?’ Margaret said, scathingly. ‘Niall, wait in the car.’
Niall scurried back out the front door, half afraid of Margaret.
‘Sorry, Mam,’ Kate said, brushing away the tears.
‘What in God’s name has you in such a state?’
‘Trevor Rush,’ Kate said, holding up the locket and the ring.
Margaret looked at it and immediately figured out what had happened.
‘I knew he was somehow involved in all this. I told you from day one that he was a loser who’d never amount to anything!’
‘Except he did amount to something, Mam. He made something of himself. Nine years ago he gave me his grandmother’s priceless engagement ring. But I never went back to him. I never gave him the chance to propose!’ Kate cried.
‘Of course you never went back – you saw him cheating on you, for God’s sake!’
‘But he didn’t cheat! It was all just a big misunderstanding,’ Kate cried. ‘It turns out—’
‘I don’t want to hear it!’ Margaret interrupted. ‘Crying about your ex from nine years ago the morning of your wedding? Have you any idea how pathetic you look?’
Siobhan and Natalie looked at each other in shock at Margaret’s candour.
‘I can’t help how I feel, Mam.’
‘You’ve shed enough tears over Trevor Rush. And don’t forget who helped you get over him. I was the one who had to listen to you crying every night. Had to listen to you writing silly little songs about a lowlife who never gave a damn about you in the first place. He is completely wrong for you!’
Margaret may have been there through the tears, but she didn’t have the full picture. Sure, in many ways, Trevor was Mr Wrong.
But he was the right kind of wrong.
The kind that makes you want to break every rule in the book.
The kind that makes you want to risk everything.
The kind that makes you want to put it all on black thirteen.
Even on your wedding day.
‘You don’t understand, Mam,’ Kate said. ‘He’s spent nine years heartbroken just like I did! He never stopped loving me!’
‘And where is he now, Kate?’ Margaret said. ‘If he loves you so much, where is he?’
Her mother’s words cut deep, as they always did. ‘He’s . . . he’s gone,’ Kate admitted.
‘Well then, that’s the end of it. You are due to marry a doctor in two hours . . .’
‘Dentist,’ Chloe muttered under her breath.
‘. . . a doctor whose family are very good people. You’re thirty, Kate. If you mess this up, you’ll be back at square one. Well, if you think I’m going to let you throw away your future over some ruffian you met nine years ago, then I have news for you. Your father will be here in the vintage car to take you to the church in one hour. So pull yourself together. This is the happiest day of your life. Now start acting like it.’
‘Okay, Mam,’ Kate said, kicking into planning mode again. ‘You’re right.’
‘I always am,’ Margaret said. ‘Give me the ring.’
‘What?’ Kate said. ‘Why?’
‘Because there’s a ring waiting for you at the church. Hand it over,’ Margaret said, holding out her hand.
Kate placed Trevor’s ring into her mother’s hand and watched her put it into her handbag.
‘And your phone.’
‘Why my . . .’
‘Because I don’t want you making a fool of yourself by ringing him. Surely you’ll hang on to the last bit of dignity you have left?’
Kate sighed and handed over her phone. It didn’t matter. She had no way of contacting Trevor on her phone anyway. He’d blocked her.
‘Now, that’s all that silliness over,’ Margaret said, putting the phone in her handbag. ‘Chloe, can you fix my daughter’s face for the photos please?’
‘Eh . . . yes, I’m on it,’ Chloe said, leading Kate to the mirror.
‘Good. Natalie, you go fetch Niall from the car. Siobhan, you go make some tea,’ Margaret said, proudly adjusting the hat on her head. ‘Everything is going according to plan.’