NEIGHBOR, FRIEND
“Team Kyle” with Chris—from left to right: Chris, Shelby Essary, Taya, Kim Essary, and Mike Essary. The Essary family joined the Kyles and other friends to wish Chris well during the airing of the television show Stars Earn Stripes.
I got my first glimpse of Chris when the moving van pulled up in front of the house Chris and Taya had just bought. I would peek out the window every little while, curious about our new neighbors. One can only imagine my thoughts when I saw our new neighbor carrying body targets out of the moving van!
I remember the first time my husband Mike and I met Chris. Taya and the kids were out of town, so we invited him over. As we sat on our back porch, there were the normal questions one asks someone they’ve just met. Chris briefly touched on the fact that he had been a sniper for the Navy. I have always been patriotic and have an enormous amount of respect for those who risk their lives and fight to keep us free, but until that time I had never had the pleasure of sitting and talking candidly with someone in the military service.
As we all talked, it was obvious Chris was what us Texans refer to as “a good ol’ boy.” I thought to myself, I like this guy—he seems genuine and down to earth.
Taya and I quickly became friends, and over time we formed a deep and close friendship. Mike and I had known some of Chris’s background in the military, but we had no idea of the degree that he had touched people’s lives over the years. It was obvious Chris was patriotic to the core and very passionate about what he believed in, but to us, Chris was just Chris: a neighbor and friend who wasn’t any different than anyone else, other than the fact that he was an ex–Navy SEAL. While he loved deeply the men and women he served with, and had a passion and love for all vets, his main focus was now on the one thing he loved more than anything, his family.
One evening Chris opened up and shared with us how hard the decision had been to leave the military. He admitted that he felt he had let his military family down. He spoke of the deep bond formed when people fight together in combat. “There is no other friendship like it in the world,” he told us. I will always remember that conversation; it allowed me to understand Chris more.
In many ways Chris was a no-nonsense type of guy; what you saw was what you got, and if you didn’t like it—that was your problem, not his. But he was never arrogant. He had a healthy confidence about him; it complemented his gentle and loving side. To me, Chris was a man who had gone through hell and back, made some hard decisions in his life, and was now focusing his heart and soul into his family.
After Chris wrote American Sniper, I used to tease him that I would get around to reading it when I didn’t have anything else better to do. It wasn’t until months later, when Mike and I were at the airport and saw it on the front table in a bookstore, that we decided to buy it.
Mike read it first. “You should read this,” he told me when he was done. “There is a lot I never knew about Chris.”
I have to admit that I didn’t get to it right away. When I did, I was shocked. I remember calling Taya and telling her, “I can’t quit crying!”
I have to admit that it was odd at first reading about our friends, but it definitely helped us to see a side of Chris that we knew very little about. My family and I had always respected him for what he had done for our country, but after reading the book, our respect grew immensely. After I finished, I put all teasing aside and marched across the street to their house. I looked Chris straight in the eyes and said, “I read your book and I had no idea. Thank you for all you have done and for all your sacrifice.”
I had tears in my eyes. He smiled that Chris Kyle smile and didn’t say a word. I slapped him on the arm and said, “By the way, your book made me cry!” I think Chris enjoyed that comment more than anything.
In the days after he died, my family saw an outpouring of love that was simply amazing. As we drove in the procession to Austin for the final services, we were in complete awe at the hundreds and hundreds of people who came out to pay their respects to Chris and his family. We had no idea of all the lives Chris had so deeply touched, and we were honored and privileged to call him our friend.