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CHAPTER

37

THEY ENDED UP CALLING IT a day early. Jeff’s death had drained them both physically and emotionally. It was around six o’clock when they reached base camp. Jasper had stayed at the site, and Andres and Danny would be joining him later. Matthew was happy that Robyn and Cal had returned with him, Alex, and Reda.

The minister got out of the Jeep and started in the direction of his Land Rover. “Well, I’m headed back to the city.”

“You are more than welcome to spend the night,” Alex offered.

Reda waved a dismissive hand. “I’ll be back first thing in the morning, and we’ll get started on cataloging.” He got into his vehicle and turned the ignition. “Tomorrow’s going to be a big day, and I love my own bed.”

“I get that,” Alex said.

With that, Reda drove off in the direction of civilization.

“I’m just going to catch a shower.” Robyn unloaded her bag from the back of the Jeep. “I’ll meet everyone in the main tent in a bit.”

“I’m going to download today’s pictures to my computer,” Cal said, and headed toward the main tent.

That left Matthew with Alex. She was at the back of the Jeep and had just slung a bag over her shoulder.

“How are you doing?” he asked.

“It’s been quite the day, hasn’t it?” Her voice was monotone. She wasn’t meeting his eyes, either.

He touched her upper arm. “That’s not what I asked.”

“I’m—” Alex looked down at his hand, and then her gray eyes flicked up and locked with his.

He wished he could kiss her and take away all her pain. But only time helped to lick that wound, and even then, it would fester and bleed, only to scab over and over again.

And if he kissed her, and she didn’t appreciate his timing…

But she was still looking at him, and she tilted up her chin.

To hell with it!

He put his mouth on hers. Her lips parted and his tongue swept into her mouth, taking what he wanted and giving in equal measure. People said that heartbreak couldn’t be healed in bed, but he believed it could be temporarily alleviated. But even if they weren’t going to sleep together, he wanted her to know that she wasn’t alone, that he was here for her.

She moaned, arousing him further. He cupped the back of her head, drawing her closer to him, and knocked off her hat. He dug his fingers through her locks of blond hair.

“We…should…” Her words came out on clipped breaths, and her bag fell to the ground at their feet.

He felt consumed by her. He wanted to rip her clothes off, to take her. He wanted all of her. He gripped the hem of her shirt, praying for the willpower to be strong. But his hands went under the fabric, grazing the skin at her waist. She wrapped her arms around his hips, and she pulled him against her. She seemed to want him just as badly as he wanted her.

It took all his resolve to put some distance between them, but this wasn’t the place to be doing this. He caressed her cheek, his jaw clenched with hunger. His focus was fixed on her—on her lips, on the feel of her skin, on the sweet, hot spot between her legs.

“Do you want to—” He swallowed roughly.

She nodded, keeping her gaze locked on his. Her eyes were at half-mast, and her cheeks flushed.

He picked up the bag she had dropped and slipped the strap over a shoulder. They each wrapped an arm around the other, and with her free hand, she held on to his, which was draped over her shoulder, against her chest. She interlaced her fingers with his and rubbed his palm with the pad of her thumb.

They were rounding the main tent toward his tent when they ran into Cal.

His gaze went straight to Matthew. His eyes were full of judgment, and Matthew felt his temperature rising. “I thought you were backing up—”

Cal held up his hand, in which he held a data drive, and butted his head in the direction of the Jeep. “Looks like you forgot your hat.”

Matthew and Alex turned around.

“Oh.” Alex glanced at Matthew and smiled. “I should probably go get that.”

Under different circumstances, Matthew would have volunteered to get it for her, but he had a pressing matter to deal with. The second Matthew figured she was out of earshot, he lowered his voice and growled, “Can you just mind your own…business?” It took restraint not to say fucking business.

“This is me minding my business.” Cal smacked a hand over his heart. “You and Robyn are my closest friends besides Sophie. And if you screw things up with Alex, we’ll be on the first plane home to Canada.”

“She’s not going to—”

“All we’ve been through will have been for nothing. Almost dying…would have been for no reason,” Cal cut in, as if he hadn’t heard a word Matthew had said.

Matthew didn’t know how to respond, so he shook his head and gritted his teeth.

“You look like a raging bull when you do that. You do realize that?”

“Not the time, Cal.”

“You’re just mad because you know I’m right,” Cal delivered pointedly. “And if you sleep with Alex, can you imagine how that will affect Robyn? Do you even care?”

“Robyn doesn’t have any right to be upset.” Matthew would stick with that justification because it held merit. They were friends.

“Whether you think she does or not, she is upset.” Cal paused. “You saw her today.”

“A man died today,” he countered.

Cal cocked his head. “Is that what you’re telling yourself? That she’s only acting this way because of Jeff?”

Matthew knew there had to be more to Robyn’s attitude than Jeff’s death, as it seemed to get worse around Alex. “Listen, Robyn and I are both adults.”

“If you say so.” Cal shrugged.

Matthew glared at his friend for the insinuation that he wasn’t one. “We’re both adults,” he repeated. “We are not dating, and I am free to see other people, as is she.”

“Oh, you’re obtuse.”

“She told me that it wasn’t our time.”

“She told you that?” Everything from his friend’s tone of voice and the high pitch of his question to his body language told Matthew that Cal was skeptical.

“Uh-huh.” So it was a slight variation of the truth, but she had agreed when he’d said it.

“When did she say that?”

“You’re relentless.” Matthew looked over his shoulder. A breeze had carried off Alex’s hat, and she was chasing after it.

“When?” Cal pressed.

Matthew faced Cal again. “When we got back from Bolivia.”

“Ha! So almost a year ago.”

“Nothing’s changed.”

“You really believe that?”

Matthew’s insides turned cold. “I do.”

“Fine,” Cal punched out. “But you do realize that people rarely say what they mean.” Cal studied Matthew. “Who said it wasn’t the right time first?”

“What does it matter?” Matthew’s chest tightened. Was Cal implying that Robyn had only agreed to save face?

“It matters because if you said it first, she could have just said it for your benefit or to avoid embarrassment.”

Before Matthew could say anything, Alex walked up to them, all smiles.

“Sorry that took so long,” she said.

Matthew turned to her. “Now who’s apologizing like a Canadian?”

She tugged on his arm. “I guess you’re rubbing off on me.” Her smile faded, and she looked from Matthew to Cal and back again. “Is everything okay?”

Matthew held eye contact with Cal, silently daring him to speak. He didn’t. Matthew turned to Alex. “Yeah.”

“Hey, I thought I heard people out here.” The man’s voice came from behind him and Alex. He turned. Timal was walking up to them.

“Seth and I brought back a deep-dish pizza with all the toppings,” Timal continued. “It’s been sitting around a bit, but help yourselves. It’s in the fridge.”

Frustration and pent-up sexual energy coiled around Matthew’s heart, restricting his airflow. He was breathing through his mouth but could still feel his nostrils flaring. He was living up to Cal’s earlier observation of Matthew resembling a raging bull. He couldn’t take Alex to his tent now. Not yet. Anger toward Cal was still pulsing beneath the surface, and he didn’t want to rush things with Alex. She deserved better than that.

“Pizza sounds good.” Matthew tried to come across as easygoing, but he wasn’t sure he pulled it off. Still, he moved to the main tent, ignoring the fact that Alex was staring at his profile. She tagged along, and Matthew held the flap for her. He let it drop in front of Cal. Cal let himself inside and glared at Matthew.

He took two pizza boxes from the fridge and walked to the table. One of them felt especially light, and he opened it first. Empty. “Not sure why this got put away,” he said.

Alex shook her head and smirked from across the room. “Go figure. And when there’s leftovers, they’re left to sit out and spoil.”

He opened the second box, and there was an entire pizza inside. He tore off a slice, took a bite, and grabbed a seat. The food was good, but his mind was stuck on kissing Alex and how their bodies seemed to fit together perfectly. He wanted her naked flesh pressed against his, to feel her warm breath across his skin, to taste her, to savor her. Frustrated, he took another bite of pizza, and was clued into the fact that all the toppings would mean pepperoni, and he didn’t care for the stuff. He started plucking it off and built a little pile on the table in front of him.

Cal grabbed a piece of pizza, too, and sat down across from Matthew. “What time are we heading out in the morning?” His voice was laced with seemingly genuine interest. The conversation he’d initiated outside appeared to have been forgotten. And he clearly wasn’t feeling any remorse over sabotaging—or in delaying—Matthew’s plans for the evening. Cal was carrying off an Academy Award–winning performance.

Matthew met his friend’s eyes. “I have no idea. You’d have to ask Alex.”

“What’s that?” Alex, who had been in the kitchen area getting some water, walked up behind Matthew. She set her glass on the table and put her hands on his shoulders. The searing heat from her fingertips shot straight to his pants.

Cal eyeballed Matthew, and Alex’s hands on him. “Never mind.” Cal tapped the table and left.

Thank God for small miracles…

“What’s wrong with Cal?” Alex sat down beside Matthew.

“Who knows,” Matthew replied. It was a lie, but he wasn’t getting into Cal’s reasoning with Alex.

The flap of the tent opened, and Robyn came in.

“There’s pizza,” Alex said to her.

Robyn headed to the watercooler. “I can see that.”

Guilt snaked through his gut, but that was ludicrous. It’s not as if he was cheating on Robyn.

He gripped Alex’s knee. “Do you want to get out of here?”

“I wish we never came in here.” She laughed, tilting her head back just enough to expose her long, slender neck.

They left, practically running toward his tent. But they didn’t make it there before their mouths crashed together. Hands searching, fumbling, grabbing. He struggled with the zipper of his tent with one hand, because his other one was busy under Alex’s shirt. At this rate, they’d never get inside.

He pulled back. “Just a second.”

“I hope you take longer than that.” She narrowed her eyes at him, toying with him.

“Trust me. I’m going to take my time with you.”

“Now, you’re just teasing me.” She traced a fingertip down his chest.

“No, sweetheart, I’m promising you.” The tent finally cooperated, and he yanked her inside.