Chapter Four

Lulled into sleep by the comfortable excitement around her, Tanya startled awake when a hand shook her arm gently.

Squinting, she checked her watch and looked up. It hadn’t even been an hour since she had come into the waiting hall. It was the older gentleman she had spoken to earlier.

He pointed a gnarled hand up to the domed ceiling where discreetly hidden speakers called her name again.

‘Paging for Ms Singh. Pick up required at the front entrance.’

Rubbing her face, Tanya grabbed her bag and headed for the parking arena. Pushing her shades on, she realised dusk was just a couple of hours away. Within minutes, she pulled up to the main entrance.

And Mr Bollywood walked out. His jacket was missing and his cuffs were undone and he looked distinctly unhappy.

As soon as the car door closed after him, Tanya turned around, her GPS device switched on. ‘Where to, Mr Patel?’

Without meeting her eyes, he rattled off an address in a highly expensive suburb southwest of London. And Tanya, releasing a breath of relief, drove towards the motorway.

Only when they were cocooned on either side by the traffic leaving London, did Tanya chance a peek at the rearview mirror. Had something gone wrong?

His eyes were closed, and the passing flash of lights from the motorway illuminated his striking features in flashes. Something in his expression as he had stepped out of the hotel, so devoid of that charisma and dry humour, stayed with Tanya.

Keeping her eyes on the road again, Tanya strove to keep her voice matter of fact. ‘How did your meeting go, Mr Patel?’ she said, aware that he hadn’t been gone long enough to have had one.

Shaking his head, he looked out the window. ‘I had to cancel it just as Mr Giatrokos arrived.’

‘Christos Giatrokos, the newly appointed CEO of Chatsfield? That’s who your meeting was with?’

He opened his eyes lazily and met her gaze. ‘Yes.’

‘Why did you cancel it then? I thought it was important.’

‘It was. But just as we were about to sit down, my ex-wife called. Her mother was hospitalised this morning in New York. She’s going to leave early tomorrow and take Neena with her. If I don’t see her tonight, I won’t get to see her again for a month.’

‘Neena is your daughter?’ Even though their divorce itself had been a highly publicised affair, his daughter’s name had been kept out of the media.

He nodded, his gaze suddenly wary. Of course, he didn’t want to talk about his daughter. She respected that.

‘Were you able to schedule another meeting then?’

‘No. We had this meeting planned for almost three months. He has my proposal. It’s his move next anyway.’

‘Proposal for what?’

She almost waited for him to tell her off. She didn’t know why she was asking or why he was indulging her. Only that she wanted to. It was a strange and compelling thing to see the man beneath his onscreen persona. He was no less arresting but more complex than she had thought.

‘To build a Chatsfield Hotel in Mumbai,’ he said, after a small pause.

‘Oh.’ Blinking, Tanya licked her lips. ‘I didn’t know you had other interests.’

‘You thought I was every inch the pretentious playboy the media calls me?’

‘Yes, no…I mean…’ Sighing, she tried again. ‘I’m aware that I know nothing about you, Mr Patel,’ she finally said, ashamed of how much she had based her assumptions of him on what she read in the gossip news. ‘Just as you don’t know anything about me.’

He was silent for a few seconds, and she knew he was wondering if she was being cheeky or genuine. ‘I’m branching out into real estate. All this sex symbol stuff and adoration of millions has gone to my head,’ he said, and Tanya grinned, hearing the humour in his voice.

In the rear view mirror, she caught a quick glimpse of that dimple in his cheek. Which was just as attractive as the self-deprecating tone of his words. ‘As soon as I finish the last movie I’m contracted for, I’m walking away from acting.’

***

By the time Tanya pulled the Audi into the quiet suburb, night had fallen. The neighbourhood was every inch the paradise of suburbia that she had imagined. And of course, the media didn’t even know that he owned a house here or that his daughter was being brought up here.

His quiet declaration about quitting acting still ringing in her head, Tanya switched off the engine. She stepped out of the car and opened the door for him.

He stretched his long legs. And pressed some cash into Tanya’s hands. ‘Find yourself dinner, Ms Singh. I shouldn’t need you for a few hours at least.’

***

Tanya was listening to the radio after scarfing down her peanut butter sandwich when Mr Bollywood stepped out of the house. His buttons were undone, there was a grease mark on his jaw, and his hands were coated in something black. Before she could open the door, he rapped on the window on her side, and she lowered it.

Tanya smothered a smile with the utmost effort. His thick hair stood up wildly in several directions. ‘Is something wrong, Mr Patel?’

‘No, Ms Singh. But my ex-wife is out getting ready for the trip and we have a four-year-old-needs-cheeseburger crisis. And I can’t leave her.’

This time, Tanya laughed. She switched on the ignition and keyed in a search for fast food joints into the GPS device. ‘Be back in a few,’ she said, and proceeded to make a U-turn.

***

She was dropping off the cheeseburgers at the front door when her phone rang. Smiling at the little girl who grabbed the bag from her fingers like a hungry lioness, Tanya said, ‘Hello?’

Her cousin Jessie’s loud squeal startled her so much that her fingers slipped over the touchscreen, clicking the speaker on. The phone slipped from her fingers and landed on the plush carpet with very little noise.

But Jessie’s invasive and overexcited questions were loud in the ensuing silence.

So…Tanya, what did you think of the surprise? Tell me, is he as hot as we used to think he was?

Her gaze colliding with his flinty one over the little girl’s head, Tanya froze as she cringed at the blatant curiosity in Jessie’s words.

It was one thing to gossip about an actor, a hero that was a fantasy. But to hear Jessie’s questions when he stood two feet away from her was, his emotions slowly but surely inching out of his face, completely another.

Do you know why he’s in London? Is he back together with his ex? Please tell me you clicked a pic of him. I know you’re not supposed to but…

Tanya? Are you there?

Her breath hitching in her throat, Tanya picked up her phone and finally clicked it off.

The vicious scowl on his face speaking volumes, John opened the door. ‘Get out.’

Swallowing at the banked fury in his gaze, Tanya stepped out into the clear night, cursing Jessie and her juvenile blather.

***

An hour later, Tanya pulled out of the driveway with John in the backseat. Every inch of her thrummed with growing tension, waiting for him to say something.

Finally just before they were about to hit the motorway, she heard his icy command. ‘Pull over and step out, Ms Singh.’

She had barely stepped out of the car when she felt him as a solid presence next to her. In the relative quiet and dark of the street, every sense of hers became hyperaware as he locked her against the car with his wide frame.

‘Give me your phone.’

Shaking, Tanya met his gaze, her gut twisting into knots. ‘Sure but first…let me explain.’

‘You have two minutes before I call the police and lodge a complaint against you and your business.’

‘No, please. Don’t do that. My cousin, Jessie, she… didn’t mean it the way it sounded.’

‘What did she mean then?’

‘I used to have the biggest crush on you. Used to. A long time ago. My brother, who owns the business-’

‘Thought it would be ok to violate a confidentiality agreement? I specifically hired your company because a friend recommended you. Do you even have a business licence?’

‘Of course, I do.’ Even as fear twisted her stomach, Tanya still couldn’t silence the tremble in her legs as he stood glaring at her.

‘I know how it sounds, but it’s not-’

‘I heard her telling you to snap a pic, Ms Singh. Are there cameras in the back that you haven’t disclosed too?’

Damn the man and his hearing. Tanya couldn’t believe this was happening. He had every right to be angry.

‘No, no. Please, let me explain.’

‘Give me your phone.’ He didn’t wait for her to hand it over to him. Just grabbed it from her grasp. His jaw tight, he waved it in front of face. ‘If I find even one picture of Neena on this, I’m suing you and your brothers for violation of privacy.’

‘I was in there for barely a minute.’ Shaking, Tanya quickly ducked into the car, and pulled her licence. ‘Look at it, Mr Patel. What you heard, it’s true. But you don’t know the whole story. Don’t understand why she was being so...’

‘What is the whole story?’

It should have been hard to talk about Sunny. She should have hated him for forcing her to. But once she started, the words came easily. ‘My husband…he…died twelve months ago suddenly. I…was devastated. I don’t know how I made it so long without him…My family, they have been trying to get me to join the living again. I think, when they saw your name come up in the client list, they jumped at the chance. I think they just thought it would make me laugh. Remind me of the person I used to be. You have to believe me. I would never betray a client’s confidence and especially a child’s.

If you like, you can file a complaint against me with the chamber of commerce, for all I care, but not the business as a whole.’

His brown gaze glittered, the moon casting silver shadows on the planes of his face. ‘Is that why you are hiding behind this job?’

Whatever she had been about to say stilled in her throat as Tanya saw the genuine emotion in his eyes. Clutching the cold metal of the door behind her, she said, ‘I’m not hiding. I just...’

As if sensing how fragile she felt, he leaned against the car next to her.

‘What happened to him?’

Her throat felt just as raw as it had that afternoon. ‘He had a brain aneurysm…He was just twenty six years old, was always on the go, used to play cricket, had this incredible amount of zest for life…And then just like that, he drops in the middle of the day and is gone before I can blink.’

Dragging her tight arms from around herself, John took her hand in his and clasped it tightly. Tanya struggled to pull her hand away but he held on and finally she relaxed. And the pressure on her chest relented.

‘How long were you married for?’

Now his grip loosened but his long fingers traced her skin absently. Every inch of her focusing on his touch, on the tingling of her skin to the sensual strokes, it became easier to speak. ‘Six months. We…’ It should have felt wrong to speak of Sunny while John touched her, but Tanya couldn’t summon a reaction she didn’t feel. It was so much easier to speak to John about Sunny than her brother or Jessie or anyone else. And she didn’t question the why of it. ‘I don’t think we even got quite used to being husband and wife, you know. But I knew him my whole life, and that’s who I miss. My best friend…’

When his arm came around her shoulders and pulled her towards him, Tanya didn’t resist anymore.

He held her in a tight hug that arrested the sob rising through her like a tide. Shaking, she threw her arms around him and clung to him. And as though a match had been lit, a fire had been started, the moment went from comfort to something else. Feelings and sensations she hadn’t thought herself capable of ever again assaulted her from every side.

A violent tremble started in the pit of her stomach, spreading through her like a quake. His thighs were rock hard against hers, the buckle of his belt dug into her belly. Her fingers crept into his hair, she felt the shudder that rocked through his muscular frame.

He was so hard and hot, and it had been so long since she had felt anything, that every inch of her thrummed with a keen awareness of her own body, of the world around her, and the breathtaking embrace of the man holding her as though she was the most precious thing in the world.

***

John stiffened as his body roared with an inferno of heat and lust. The crisply tailored suit Tanya wore had teased his curiosity since he had seen her standing stiffly at airport, but now he knew.

Now he knew what lush curves hid under the suit. Knew that her long legs were toned and that her butt was curvy and taut. Knew that her waist was tiny, not even spanning the width of his whole hand and her hips lushly wide. Knew that that scent of her that had teased him incessantly was lilac. Knew that with her breasts pressing into his chest, her slender shoulders melting in his embrace, she made a perfect fit for him.

He knew that the small flicker of attraction he had guessed at between them was a ferocious fire that didn’t happen every day.

He fabricated this fire for the screen, created chemistry with a co-star for public consumption. Forced into intimacy, sometimes it even felt real. But he had learned that it was anything but. That it fragmented under the reality of life.

But this woman in his arms now, the fever in his muscles as she clung to him, it was more real than anything he had known in the last few years. The glittering pain in her eyes, the tremble in her voice when she spoke of the man she had lost, they were all too real.

And the way every inch of him curled and tightened in hunger, everything about this heat…was real, and sharp and all consuming. Suddenly, his body, feeling the effect of his celibacy during his divorce last year, demanded release. But it was this woman he wanted.

Sinking his fingers into her hair, John tugged her face up. And found her mouth with his.

He felt the shock that vibrated through her in her stillness. Her hands stilled on his chest, her dark black eyes staring at him with a mixture of startling desire and flickering fear. ‘This…this isn’t right,’ she whispered, even as her eyes glinted with hunger.

Loosening his grip in her hair, he traced the lush bow of her mouth with his lips, coaxing her, teasing her, begging her to open up for him. ‘Nothing that feels like this is wrong, Tanya.’ His thumbs traced the long column of her neck, and he waited.

She trembled again, her hands climbed up his chest, pressed into his shoulders and finally sank into his hair. His breaths coming harsh and slow, John struggled to hold himself still under her tentative touch, struggled to contain the force of his desire. His heartbeat rang in his ears like the beat of a drum.

Finally, she moved under his mouth and the tentative feathering shattered his control. He nipped her lower lip, urging her on. With a groan, she opened her mouth and John felt an erotic heat claim him.

As if it was his first kiss, as if his breath depended on it, John stroked her tongue with his, tugged his teeth over her lower lip. Felt the need in him spiral, demand more.

His groan amplified in the silent street, he stroked her lower lip, his self-control slowly but surely unraveling. His hands roved over her hips, climbed up her back. When his fingers grazed the underside of her breast, she jerked away, her gaze dark and unfocused, her chest falling and rising.

Her gaze lingered on his mouth, his hair, which she had sunk her fingers into, and then she looked down at her own clothes… A sound of utter disgust broke free from her lips. Her fingers shook as she straightened her jacket and then her shirt.

John reached for her, the slow hum of desire just as strong. He wanted nothing more than to make love to her, to give them both the relief they both so desperately craved, but he held the incessant peal of desire at bay.

He lifted her chin, tenderness filling him. ‘Tanya…it’s ok.’

Shaking her head, she pushed his hand away. ‘It’s not okay, John.’

The intensity of the attraction between them shook him, too. And after the past few years, when he had struggled to figure out what was real and what wasn’t, the depth of tenderness and heat he felt for her was like a gift more than anything else.

Fighting the urge to take her in his arms again, he spoke to her softly. ‘I know why it rattles you so much. It does me too, Tanya. But the connection we have, it doesn’t happen every day. It’s more than just lust.’

‘Of course, it’s just desire. And that’s bad enough.’ She turned towards the car, turning her back and he let her catch her breath. ‘I…I’ve never behaved like this. I mean…even with Sunny, I waited until we were married. And we didn’t even get to learn each other in that way completely…Whereas you...why is it so good between us? Why does it feel so right?’

John waited patiently, even as everything inside him braced against her words. He felt her withdrawal as tangibly as if a punch had landed in his gut, could see her pull back into herself. And there was nothing he could do about it.

She ran a hand over her face and looked at him. There was anger in her gaze and pain so deep that John only wanted to close his arms around her again. ‘The only excuse I have is that it’s you. You’re this fantasy I’ve had for so long. And you kiss…you kiss like you can steal the breath from my lungs and fill it with your own.

God, why did it have to be you tonight?

You are not real to me, John. For all the claims I made, you’ll always be John Patel to me. The fictionalised version of the perfect man that I was half in love with, growing up.

And you…you would turn any girl’s head.’