Will rounded the corner, feeling sweat pour in rivulets down his back and stomach as he jogged another block. He had been running around his neighborhood for almost two hours straight now and the muscles in his legs were starting to feel as if they could give way at any moment. But he needed this. He needed the monotony of a long Sunday morning jog to clear his head and relieve his worries.
Even after he had jogged what felt like the equivalent of the distance from Annapolis to D.C. and back, the jog still wasn’t helping to clear his thoughts. With each breath he took his thoughts returned to Keisha.
When they finally gave in to the sexual tension and became lovers, he had thought all this angst would disappear. But now he was even more confused and frustrated. Worse, his behavior was becoming more erratic. He could be caring and passionate one moment and jealous the next. It was almost as if…It was almost as if he had fallen…
“No,” he told himself as his block finally came into view, “don’t even think it.”
She could get all dewy and say that she had fallen in love but he couldn’t, he wouldn’t. Even if Will felt it, he had to keep his emotions in check. One of them had to be the stronger one. There was no way he could let the relationship be anything more than sex right now. They barely knew each other and things were already intense between them. He could only imagine what would happen if love was thrown into the mix. Where is this all going? Do we take a chance and tell people that we’re together and hope they respond well? What do we do if they don’t?
He wanted her in his future but for now, it would all be just too much too soon.
Will was on the verge of exhaustion as he drew closer to his front lawn. When he saw his mailbox he lunged for it to steady himself. He removed the lid of his water bottle.
“Good God!” he heard a voice call out to him. “You look like you’ve just come in from the cotton fields. Did you have a slave driver running after you?”
Will downed the rest of his water and squinted against the harsh bright light of morning and the salty sweat that was now caking around his eyes. He blinked in surprise as Keisha smiled and slowly rose from his front steps.
“Keisha?” he murmured in confusion between deep breaths, holding his hand against the pain in his ribs. “What…what are you doing here?”
“I came over to make you breakfast and to say thank you for the cake since I had to rush off Thursday,” she explained, wiping the back of her flared, knee-length red skirt and pointing to the bags of groceries that now sat on his steps. “I brought eggs, croissants, sausages, and blueberries, of course.” She grinned.
She looked so beautiful in her skirt and white cashmere sweater with her hair flowing over her shoulders.
“I hadn’t expected you to take this long to get back, though,” she said, walking down the driveway toward him. “It’s past breakfast, so I guess I’ll have to make you brunch instead.” Keisha’s smile faded as she drew closer to Will. “Are you okay?”
“I’m…fine,” he said as he slowly straightened. “Just…overdid it a little,” he said dismissively with a wave of his hand as he was overwhelmed by a dizzy spell. Will suddenly fell to one knee on the cement sidewalk.
“Whoa!” she cried with widened eyes, rushing forward. “Wrap your arm around my shoulder.”
Will gazed up at her. He didn’t want to dirty her up, to cover her with his sweat. Will slowly shook his head. “I’m fine. I don’t…I don’t need help.”
“Wrap your arm around my shoulder. I’m not gonna leave you here on the sidewalk!” When he didn’t budge, she crossed her arms over her chest. “Look, either you let me help you inside or I’m dragging you up there. Make your choice!” she ordered indignantly.
Will cocked an eyebrow. Just who did she think she was? He would have fought her if he had the energy, but he didn’t. He didn’t have equilibrium, either. The world still seemed to be spinning beneath his feet. He gave in and wrapped his arm around her slender shoulder and she wrapped her arm around his waist.
“One, two, three!” she said as she helped hoist him to his feet. “Now lean on me. Come on, lean on me.”
It took her a few seconds to steady herself under the burden of his weight, but she did.
“I’m sorry for…for being on top of you l-like this,” he murmured as they began the slow, laborious walk up his driveway.
“It wouldn’t be the first time,” she said between gritted teeth, “you were on top.”
At that, he chuckled
“Where are your keys?” Keisha asked when they finally reached his front door.
“Right…hip,” Will said weakly. He felt her dig into the pockets of his shorts.
Minutes later, Will landed on the leather cushions of his living room sofa with a thud. Keisha stood over him, slowly shaking her head as her chest heaved up and down.
She fanned herself with her hands and sighed. “So tell me, Mr. Blake,” she called over her shoulder as she walked into his kitchen. Will heard her turn on the sink faucet. Seconds later she returned with a glass of water and handed it to him. “What exactly did you think you were doing out there? If I hadn’t have showed up you would have passed out on your lawn or worse, died of heat exhaustion!”
“It’s September, Keisha,” he replied as he sipped from his water glass. Will’s nausea and dizzy spell had mercifully subsided in the cool light of his living room. He watched as she opened his front door again to retrieve her grocery bags. “It’s too cold for heat exhaustion.”
“Uh-huh,” she murmured. She carried the two paper bags into his kitchen, kicked off her shoes, and sighed. “Seriously, you couldn’t tell that your body was worn out? Why did you keep running?”
To stop agonizing over you, Will thought, but he answered her with silence instead. Will slowly rose from the couch and stretched. “Thanks for all this, Keisha. I think…I’m going to take a shower now.”
“Okay,” she said as she began to open an egg carton. “Brunch should be done by the time you get back.”
He paused to gaze at Keisha, watching as she opened his drawers and kitchen cabinets, searching for a bowl and a spatula. Funny, when Gretchen had done the same thing several months ago, it had grated on Will’s nerves like nails on a chalkboard. But with Keisha, it felt natural. He liked having her there. Will’s heart swelled as he watched her work.
When Will returned from the shower fifteen minutes later, it was to the smell of sausages.
“You’re feeling better, I hope?” she called out to him as he walked into his kitchen.
Will tugged a clean T-shirt over his head, shoved his arms inside, and sighed. He also had switched from his soaking wet running shorts to a pair of faded jeans. “Much better.”
“Good.” Keisha smiled as she motioned for him to sit at the dinette table. “Give me a few minutes to finish up the eggs and brunch will be done.”
He lowered himself into one of the wooden chairs and watched as she worked over one of the burners on his stainless steel stove. His “top of the line” appliance had been used less than ten times since he moved into his home. Will smiled, realizing that today was probably the first time he was finally getting his money’s worth.
He watched as Keisha paused from her cooking to pull her hair up into a causal bun atop her head. A few loose tendrils still escaped around her ears, temples, and the nape of her neck. She had removed her cashmere sweater while he had been taking a shower. Now she wore only a white tank top that revealed her golden shoulders and back. He watched as she absently hummed an old R&B tune while scrambling his eggs. She seemed so at home standing there.
“You look comfortable,” he murmured.
Keisha turned from the stove and stared at him in puzzlement. “Huh?”
He pointed at her bare feet.
She followed his gaze. “Oh, sorry,” she murmured with a bashful smile as she turned off the gas burner. “I always cook with no shoes on. I like to feel the cold tile underneath my feet.” She wiggled her toes on the ceramic tile. “That’s how I cook at home. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Not at all,” Will said with wry grin. “I like it. It’s very…,” he paused, “…charming.”
Keisha pursed her lips. “That’s an interesting way to describe it.” She chuckled as she removed the frying pan from the burner and scooped a mound of eggs and several link sausages onto a plate. Keisha fixed him with her warm, doe-like eyes as she walked across the kitchen and placed the plate in front of him.
He looked up at her and noticed she wasn’t making a plate for herself. He frowned. “You’re not eating?”
“Nope, I had a big breakfast already,” she murmured as she lowered herself into a chair facing him. She silently watched him eat a few forkfuls before hesitantly opening her mouth and then closing it. “Actually, Will,” she began, “I wanted to make you breakfast to make up for last week, but I do have an ulterior motive for coming here, too.”
He leaned forward and continued to eat his eggs. “Is that so?” he asked as he glanced up at her. “And what would that be?”
She squirmed anxiously in her chair and sighed, making him frown. “It’s hard for me to talk about this. In fact we never talk about it probably because it’s so awkward to talk about,” she rambled. “But I think…I think we’ve reached the point where…we…have to talk about it.”
Will stopped eating. “Okay,” he said. He lowered his fork to his plate and leaned back in his chair. “What do we need to talk about?”
“Will, I…we…” She paused as if trying to find the right words. “What are we going to do if…someone finds out about us?”
He gazed at her suspiciously. “Why? Are you worried?”
“No.” She quickly shook her head. “I mean yes. I mean…I don’t know. I mean…if they do…” She tucked her hair behind her ears. “What do we tell them? I kind of feel like there should be a game plan on…what to do, how to respond. I mean, if George found out about us, how would you explain this to him?” she asked as she pointed around the kitchen, as if evidence of their affair was everywhere, even on the walls.
Will’s frown intensified. “I’m still trying to figure out why you think anyone would find out.” He paused. “Have you told someone, Keisha?”
She blinked and quickly shook her head. “No! No, I-I haven’t…told anyone,” she said a little too loudly, making him suspicious. “I mean just…hypothetically. If Phil found out, what should I tell him?” She tilted her head. “What should I say?”
Will stared at her in confusion while she gazed at him intently. “I don’t know,” he muttered before wiping his mouth with a napkin and shrugging. “Tell him whatever you have to tell him to keep your job, I guess,” he answered flippantly. “Hell, tell him it was a momentary fit of insanity. Say it was a mistake that will never happen again.”
Her shoulders slumped. She actually looked hurt. “Is that really what you would say, Will?” she asked quietly as her gaze fell to the table.
He sighed gruffly with impatience. “Keisha, what is this about?”
She looked up at him. Her eyes were watery. “It’s about us, Will! It’s about what would happen if you were cornered and forced to say how you felt about…” Her voice faded. He watched as she suddenly rose from the dinette table. She reached for her sweater, which had been draped over the back of her chair, and quickly shoved her arms into each sleeve. “I have to go,” she said abruptly.
“What?” he asked, frowning with confusion.
She walked across the kitchen and gathered her purse. “I still have my Sunday errands to finish.”
“Errands? Wait. Dammit, Keisha, wait!” Will leapt up from the table as she rushed across the kitchen. He grabbed her arm just as she reached the entrance to the living room. He dragged her back toward him. “Don’t act like this. Just tell me what’s wrong!”
“Everything’s wrong, Will,” she said irritably as she yanked her arm out of his grasp. She tried to walk out of the kitchen again but he extended his arm across the door frame, blocking her path. Will watched as she tightly pursed her lips.
“Will, get out of the way.”
“I will when you talk to me,” he said, making her sigh loudly. “You asked me a question and I answered it. Why are you angry?”
“I’m…I’m…” She furiously shook her head. She closed her eyes and sighed. “I’m risking so much to be here, Will. I’m taking such a huge risk, and I don’t know why.”
At that, he blinked. “What do you mean, you don’t know why?”
“I just wonder if I should take the chances that I’m taking just for this, for a ‘momentary fit of insanity’?” she said, spitting his words back at him. “I mean…is it really worth it?”
He gritted his teeth and lowered his arm, feeling the sting of her words. Is it really worth it? What she really meant was, “Are you really worth it, Will?”
He took a deep breath. “You tell me, Keisha,” he said quietly, trying his best to mask his anger. He silently counted to ten, urging himself not to lose control again.
“I’ve been floating around without a tether,” she said as she turned away from him and crossed her arms over her chest. “I realize that now. I’ve been avoiding facing the truth for way too long.”
He cocked an eyebrow as she began to pace in front of him. “What truth?”
“That I’m too far gone!” she exclaimed, raising her arms helplessly. “I’m just dangling out there! I realized that this may just be some fling that—”
His eyes widened. “Some fling?” he repeated with disbelief. Did she realize how much she was insulting him?
“Don’t look so shocked, Will,” she insisted. “Two minutes ago you said as much yourself. This could be just some fling that could probably come back to bite me in the ass and make me look stupid! The sex is good but it’s not that good! I can’t just ignore reality!” she cried, making his nostrils flare as he fought to keep his emotions under control. “Can you promise me that I won’t be disappointed? No. Can you promise me that I’m not going to lose my job if someone finds out? No. Can you promise—”
“Dammit, Keisha!” he shouted, unable to control his anger anymore. “No, I can’t promise you anything! But nothing’s been promised to me, either!”
She fell silent and blinked at him in surprise.
“You’re not the only person who’s risking anything around here!” he boomed. “What the hell do you think I’ve been doing for the past fifteen years? This isn’t my first campaign, you know! It took a long time for me to get where I am today, to build a reputation, and I’m not eager to blow it all to hell, either! Not to mention the fact that Dupré trusts me like a son,” Will spat. “Do you think I like lying to the man, to everyone else? Do you think that makes me feel good?”
Keisha frowned and gazed up at him guiltily. She opened her mouth and closed it. She finally slowly shook her head. “No, I don’t,” she said quietly.
“So don’t tell me about how much you’re risking, all right?” he bellowed. “Because you’re not the only one who can mess up your career with this, and you’re not the only one who could get your heart broken for the sake of ‘some fling’ either! I’m dangling out there, too!”
The kitchen fell silent. Keisha stared at Will dumbfounded. “Heart broken?” she repeated with disbelief.
Will rolled his eyes. Why did he blurt that out? So much for keeping his emotions in check. He crossed his arms over his chest. “You heard me,” he said stubbornly, refusing to repeat it again.
Keisha’s eyes widened and her face went a shade of pink. “I wasn’t sure…I mean, I didn’t know that you …that you felt the same way,” she said in a barely audible whisper. “When I…When I said Thursday that I…” She sighed. “You didn’t say anything back. I thought…I thought you might not…” She fell silent.
“Yeah, well, now you know,” he mumbled, refusing to meet her searching eyes. But Keisha wouldn’t let him look away. She reached up and placed her hands on his cheeks and turned his face toward her so that their eyes locked. Her piercing gaze seemed to look right at his very core.
“What?” he asked indignantly, furrowing his brows and frowning down at her.
“You really do love me, don’t you?” she whispered, slowly breaking into a smile. She was awed by the realization.
He stubbornly held fast, refusing to speak. Finally, he begrudgingly nodded. Keisha breathed in sharply and blinked rapidly, fighting back another onslaught of tears.
He sighed before finally giving her a smile. “Keisha, don’t cry,” he murmured before rubbing her shoulders.
Her eyelids lowered as she suddenly stood on the tips of her toes, wrapped her arms around his neck and raised her lips to his. The kisses she showered on his lips and cheeks were sweet and achingly tender. All the love that was poured into them was so palpable it hit him like a punch to the gut. Unable to resist, Will wrapped his arms around Keisha, pulling her closer to him. He closed his eyes and kissed her back with equal tenderness, wanting to say with action what he still did not feel comfortable saying with words. He let his kisses slide along her lips, the edges of her mouth, chin, and ears. He tugged her sweater off her shoulders and pulled down the straps of her tank top to place the same kisses along her neck and collarbone as she tilted back her head. He heard her moan and instinctively his mouth returned to hers. He brought one hand to her breast while the other quickly undid her bun. As her hair fell around her shoulders, Keisha parted her lips to let their kiss deepen. Will felt himself harden as her hand lowered the zipper of his jeans.
Everything from that point happened in a flash. It took only seconds to get her on the dinette table. Their mouths never separated even as her panties slid to her ankles, and then off, and he lowered his hand to feel the slick wetness between her thighs. His heart pounded wildly in his chest. His breathing deepened. When he quickly parted her legs and entered her, Will couldn’t help himself. Against her mouth, he began to babble, to say everything he couldn’t say before. He told her that he loved her, that he needed her and that he would never hurt her. Everything after that faded into a blur.