Natasha had fallen asleep crying, so she didn’t hear her brother come home and make something to eat. Coming out of her room, Nat went to the kitchen to make a sandwich for a late dinner, as her stomach had started growling the minute she woke up. While she was spreading the mayonnaise on the toasted bread, she started crying again. It wasn’t like she meant to cry. It just happened.
Natasha knew that she might have to put her schooling on hold again, but she’d still complete her education. Otherwise, she would be like people who always relied on others, and there was no way she’d rely on Damon. Even if he insisted, and got his way that they marry.
Natasha wiped her tears. She never thought her life would end up like this. She loved fairy tales, and had read all the stories, so she’d always outlined her dreams for her own future to be just like them. The prince would battle the dragons before swooping her off her feet. They would then get married, have children, and live happily ever after.
Sure, Natasha fantasized about Damon and all the wonderful things they could do together. Her fantasies had never included getting pregnant and married at such a young age, however. Natasha was carrying Damon Cullen’s baby, and she was very much in love with him.
But was he her prince?
Nathan walked in shortly after Natasha finished her sandwich. She was now crying over the revelation that she was in love with her baby’s father. He was her fake boyfriend, who would soon become her very real husband.
“Why are you crying?” Nathan carelessly asked while heading over to the fridge to get a drink.
Wiping the tears away, she quietly mumbled, “Don’t worry about it.”
“Was that your piggy-bank boyfriend over here earlier? The one that Natalie has told me about,” Nathan commented, with a look of disgust on his face.
“What?” Nat asked, annoyed. She wondered why her brother was home, and not in training like he should be. Natasha hoped that he didn’t mess up this job which she had lined up for him. The parole officers had told her that Nathan had to be on his best behavior or he could end up back in prison to serve out the remainder of his time.
“Is he the guy you sold yourself to?” her brother said with distain. “Tillie said you guys seemed to have gotten richer when you started dating him. Does the personal shopper ring a bell?” Nathan commented haughty.
“Fuck off!” Natasha said, irritated, while heading back to her room.
Great! Now her brother also thought the reason she was going out with Damon was because he had money. How would Nathan like it if Natasha told him that she was having Damon’s baby, and that he’d be in their lives forever! Since she was going to marry him.
She felt that it would be best to raise their child together. Natasha had a feeling that Damon would not accept the role of temporary parent. He would not like having his child sent back and forth to each of their homes, and she didn’t like the idea of her son or daughter being shipped back and forth, because it wasn’t healthy.
Natasha hadn’t told Damon her decision yet. But if he only wanted to marry her because she was having his baby, well she was going to want a few compromises from him. She didn’t feel comfortable with having a pre-nuptial agreement standing in the way of their marriage. He was going to have to accept her for who she was, and she wasn’t a gold-digger. She also wanted Damon to treat her with the respect he’d shown her while they’d been away at the Château. She didn’t believe his behavior toward her while they were away had only been an act. Natasha actually felt like he’d been himself: the kind, generous man she had a feeling he had once buried. She was pretty sure that, with time, he would open up to her more about his life. Nat had a suspicion Damon had a few demons from his past that he needed to deal with. When she had looked at him the odd time, he had seemed troubled.
And would it be too much to have Damon love her? She wasn’t going to demand that he love her right away. However, if he could accept the idea of falling in love with her in time, she could live with that. While he had made a scene at the grocery store, she felt in her heart that he had been jealous of her being out with Austin. And jealousy was a good start to falling in love.
She now sat on her bed pondering why Nathan was home now, when he was supposed to be in training. Natasha just hoped he hadn’t screwed up. Nathan had better not have quit or been fired!
*****
Damon headed back to the hospital since he had left his car parked there. He first checked on his sister, but she was sleeping. As he was leaving her room, his mother joined him outside in the hallway. There had been something eating away at his conscience, and it wasn’t his newfound guilt.
“Mom, I was wondering if I could talk with you.”
Siena looked at Damon with concern. He could tell she knew that whatever he wanted to talk about... had nothing to do with Donna, just by the grave look on his face. While their relationship may be weak, it was about time they should probably talk about some things. She walked with Damon to a private seating area in the hospital. Taking a seat across from her son, she reached out with her hand to take one of his. “What’s bothering you?”
He held his mother’s hand tenderly, feeling the love and warmth. Swallowing, he looked at her nervously. He wasn’t going to tell his mother about Natasha being pregnant. He didn’t know where he sat with that right now, and he first had to make it right between him and Nat. Expelling his long held breath, he asked, “Why did I get hit by a car when I was eight?” Seeing his mother close her eyes, he pressed on. “I mean, how did I get to be in that busy road when we had secure gates and guards watching over us?”
Damon felt his mother’s hand start to tremble. Looking at her, he could see that she now had tears building in her eyes. “I hate that I don’t remember anything before I was eight-years-old. So I want to know what led to me being hit by a car,” he said with a lump growing in his throat, and pain forming in his heart.
His mother looked him dead on, as tears slipped out. “You walked in on a very nasty fight that your father and I were having.”
Looking at her with concern, he then asked, “Wasn’t I with one of the maids?”
“I didn’t allow the maids to raise you, and you were too old to have a nanny.” Siena had wiped some of the tears off her face and then said, “I thought you were safe in your room.”
He sat back in the chair after having dropped his mother’s hand. Clearing his throat, Damon then asked, “What was the fight about that it was so nasty?” He’d never seen his parents fight while they lived together for the two years after the accident.
His mother looked down to the floor, then brought her face level with his before running both her hands over her face and forehead, then down the back of her hair. She let out a shaky breath and quietly said, “Your father was very angry that I’d gotten pregnant.”
Siena could see the look of confusion on her son’s face. “We weren’t the perfect match. I had met him at a party his parents threw. He was taken by my beauty, and I was taken by his charm.” Seeing Damon eyeing her curiously, she continued, “Back then, having a child out of wedlock wasn’t accepted...at least, not in my family.” Siena looked off to the side before blushing and looking at her son. “When my father found out, he went straight over to your father’s home. I never did learn what was said, but whatever my father said to your dad resulted in a proposal from Owen.”
“Dad’s parents made him marry you?”
“I think my father made him marry me. My dad could be quite forthcoming and demanding, but it didn’t matter. I was embarrassed that I was being proposed to because I was with child.” She smiled at Damon weakly. “It was funny. Even though Owen had to ask me to marry him, he wasn’t mad. When I was further along in my pregnancy with you, Owen said he couldn’t imagine marrying a more beautiful woman.”
“So why was the fight nasty?” Damon asked, confused. Why had his parents broken up if it sounded like they loved each other? he wondered.
With her fingers interlocked and her hands together, Siena looked at her son earnestly. “Our marriage wasn’t terrible until I fell pregnant with Donna.” She saw Damon’s concerned expression. “Owen was happy that you were a son. I don’t think he would have minded if you had been a girl. However, I did have a terrible time while pregnant with you. I was constantly sick...” She looked down and he could see her silently pray for strength, for Damon deserved to know the truth. “...I’d even bled a few times throughout the pregnancy.” Seeing Damon’s eyes widen in alarm, she stopped.
Getting up out of her chair, she moved to sit beside him. She turned so they could look at each other directly, for she had to continue. “Once you were born, the doctor advised me not to get pregnant again. He said it could cost me my life.”
Damon reached out and wrapped an arm around his mother’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry.”
She smiled at him with a silly grin. “It wasn’t your fault. And it wasn’t your father’s. My body just couldn’t carry a baby...” Damon wrapped both his arms around her, preventing Siena from continuing.
After hugging her, Damon then said, “Thank you for being the best mom ever!”
She smiled at him with happy tears in her eyes. “We’re never going to get this story out if we keep hugging,” she chuckled. He nodded his head for her to go on. “Life was good for the next many years. You, your father, and I were very happy. I didn’t get pregnant again, at least not until you were seven.”
“I don’t understand?”
“Nor did I, at first. It wasn’t that we weren’t intimate. We had a healthy...” She could see that Damon was embarrassed, so she didn’t continue that part of the story. “Anyway, after a couple months of not getting my period, I went and saw a doctor. They confirmed that I was with child, and I was almost three months along.” Placing her right hand on Damon’s thigh and looking him in the eye, she continued, “I felt pretty good that this pregnancy wasn’t going to be the end of me. So I told your father...” Siena stopped talking, because she flashed back to that moment in her life...
Damon was in his room contently playing with his cars, so she had no worries that her son would overhear her and Owen talking. When she eventually told her husband she was pregnant with another child, Siena was taken aback when Owen flipped out on her. He was shocked and scared. Owen didn’t think that she would ever get pregnant because he always wore protection when they made love. Siena couldn’t go on birth control since she was allergic to all the brands.
When he asked her how far along she was, she told him that she was almost three months along. He demanded she have an abortion. Owen soon told her his reasoning when she broke down crying. Siena couldn’t do it. She felt different with this pregnancy, so she told her husband that she was older and that she had no worries. But, he was adamant that she terminate the pregnancy. Owen told her it wasn’t because he didn’t love her that he wanted her to have an abortion. He wanted her to end it because he did love her and was terrified of losing her.
She begged and pleaded with him that this baby wouldn’t kill her. However, he got so angry with her for fighting him on the topic that he started shouting. Since he was shouting at her, she screamed back at him in rage.
Neither of them heard Damon come downstairs. Nor had they heard him open the door to the study. They were arguing for the first time ever in their marriage.
Owen had turned around from looking out of his window and pointed a harsh finger at her. He fumed, “I will not have that baby destroy all that I have built!”
“I promise you that I will not let this be the end of me,” she had cried.
“You would choose this baby over our son and me!” Owen glared at her with rage.
“I’m not saying that I don’t love Damon, or that I’m not happy...”
“Mom, Dad...” They both heard Damon’s voice. “…you don’t love me?”
Both Siena and Owen looked toward Damon, who was standing in the doorway with tears streaming down his face. Seeing her son crying and accusing them of not loving him broke her heart. She walked gently toward him. “Oh... Damon...” But, before she could get out what she wanted to say, he had run off.
“Mom,” Damon said, breaking his mother out of her memories. “What happened?”
She blinked her new tears away. “You didn’t think that I loved you, and you had overheard your father and me arguing. I was about to explain that I did love you and that you had nothing to worry about, but you had run off.” She felt her throat tighten with her emotions. “Your father yelled at me for making you think that you were unloved, but I didn’t care at that moment. I needed to go after you. I needed to reassure you that I did love you, and I would never leave you.” With both her hands, she wiped the tears off her face, and continued. “I was too late. I headed upstairs to your room, thinking you had gone to hide there...”
Damon pulled her into a hug, as she was crying pretty heavily. After a few minutes of hugging, she pulled back and stood. Putting her hands in her pockets, she looked down at Damon, who was sitting on the chesterfield. “You had actually run out of the house.” Biting her bottom lip, she continued, “I heard the screeching of brakes while I was just leaving your room. Your father had been at the front door, about to go for a drive to help him think. He did that to think. He got to you before me...but you’d already just been hit by a fast-moving car.” Siena blinked away her new tears, but they kept falling.
Damon stood and looked tenderly at his mother. “I ran out into traffic because I overheard you and Dad fighting?”
Siena nodded her head, while braking down. “You had heard something out of context, and it broke your heart.”
Damon ran a hand through his hair and thought back... He remembered suffering headaches for many months after coming home from the hospital. There was always tension between his parents, and he could never understand why. The way his father spoke to his mother had always bothered him. He wasn’t allowed to spend much time with his mother, either. Then when Donna was born, his father rarely had anything to do with her. His parents never shared the same room. It was like they were strangers living under one roof.
When he was ten, he had come home from school one day to find that Donna and his mom were both gone. Damon went to ask his dad about this, and Owen told him that his mother’s mom was dying, and Siena wanted to visit her. Soon after that, Damon had asked why his sister and mom weren’t back yet. His father had told him that his mother’s parents had died. Owen Cullen had told his son that his mother was too grief-stricken to come home, and that he should forget about them.
It wasn’t until Damon was sixteen that he wanted to know where his mother and sister were. He got his way, by saying he knew his father had had to pay off a young maid a couple years before. When his father finally told Damon where his mom and sister were, he demanded that he be allowed to visit them.
“Was there ever a chance that you two could have gotten back together after my accident?”
She shook her head, and then whispered, “No.” When Damon frowned at her, she continued, “Your father blamed me for your loss of memory.”
“That’s not right,” Damon said, sickened by his father’s actions.
“When my mother got sick, I told Owen that I wanted to see her before she died. He told me I couldn’t take you with me. I could only take Donna.” She looked up and saw confusion on her son’s face. “Since you didn’t remember all the good times and the love that we shared as a family before the accident, your father blamed me for the destruction of our marriage. He always had to be present while I was taking care of you.”
“But it wasn’t your fault,” Damon said honestly.
“You know, for many years...I blamed myself for...everything.” Siena took a seat and looked up at Damon. “Since you had overheard me, it was my fault you ran into traffic. And because I still wanted to have the baby, your father turned away from me.”
“It was not your fault, Mom,” Damon said, before sitting back down.
“Everything changed after the accident. Your father didn’t trust me to be alone with you. He didn’t want your sister. Your dad didn’t care that I hadn’t died during labor. He wasn’t even present, and he didn’t want to rebuild our marriage. He had put up such a wall against me and the baby. It was like we didn’t exist. Our once-happy family was gone because I didn’t listen to your father.”
Damon looked at his mother, and could see that she was spent. Telling him the story of what led up to his memory loss had taken a toll on her. She looked older and defeated.
As soon as she stopped talking, a nurse came to take her to Donna’s room.
When his mom got up to leave, Damon stood as well. Taking her within his embrace, he hugged his mother tighter than he ever had. “I forgive you, and I have never stopped loving you,” he tenderly whispered into his mother’s ear.
She finally pulled out of his embrace, smiling at him. “Thank you. Hearing that means the world to me.” She left him standing alone in the private lounge.
As someone who was about to become a father himself, he did and didn’t understand his father’s actions. It was clear that his parents had loved each other, even though his parents hadn’t courted normally and were married because his mother had gotten pregnant with him. However, his father was being a true Cullen and blocking himself from any pain that he wished not to receive.
Damon knew his father hadn’t loved the many women that he’d been with since Siena had left. His father never talked about Donna, and when Damon asked about his mom, his dad would tell him that he didn’t want to talk about it. He had to wonder if his father had any regrets. Perhaps his father still loved his mom?