Epilogue

Adam managed a smile as Nicole walked towards where he waited nervously with Nathaniel on the quayside. ‘Phil’s just parking the car,’ she said, leaning in to give Adam a kiss, and then wiping the lipstick from his cheek. ‘I thought I’d come and give you a bit of moral support.’

‘Thanks, I could use it.’ Adam managed to say, though he wasn’t entirely sure he’d manage to get whole sentences out for much longer.

‘Scrubs up nicely, doesn’t he?’ Nathaniel grinned and indicated Adam’s attire.

Nicole followed his gaze to look Adam up and down, who, freshly shaven and hair almost tamed, was as immaculately turned out as he could ever hope to be. ‘He wears it well,’ she conceded, taking in the three-piece grey suit, white shirt and blue silk tie. ‘If only he could stop fidgeting in it.’ She shook her head and attempted to pull his hand away as Adam checked his watch and then tugged at his shirt collar.

‘I just can’t get him to calm down.’ Nathaniel sighed and reached to straighten Adam’s now skew-whiff tie, again.

‘What time is it?’ Adam asked, croakily.

Nathaniel eyed the skies. ‘About the same time as when you just looked. Stop worrying, Adam. She’ll be here.’

‘Right.’ Adam nodded resolutely, drew in a breath, checked his watch, and loosened his tie. ‘You don’t think she’s changed her mind, do you?’

‘Adam, she’ll be here.’ Nicole sighed good-naturedly.

Adam wasn’t convinced. ‘You don’t think anything’s gone wrong then?’

‘For God’s sake, man, get a grip.’ Nathaniel wrapped an arm around him and gave his shoulders a firm squeeze. ‘She loves you. You look so irresistible, I’d marry you. Nothing’s gone wrong. She’ll be here, trust me. She’s probably titivating and whatnot.’

‘Bound to be.’ Nicole nodded knowingly. ‘It’s what women do.’ Swapping amused glances with Nathaniel, she eyed Adam pseudo-despairingly – and reached to straighten his tie.

Adam nodded, pulled in another long breath and resisted checking his watch.

‘If you don’t stop doing that, you’ll hyperventilate.’ Nathaniel checked his, then coughed, then laced his hands behind his back and tapped a toe.

Adam nodded again, sure his restricting collar was way too tight to get the crucial words past the lump in his throat. She would be here. She did love him. He breathed more slowly and tried to reassure himself, but couldn’t quite quell the sick panic rising inside him.

‘The venue’s … different,’ Nicole observed, glancing around at the balloon and flower festooned boats. Adam’s, where the couple would be making their vows, most flower festooned of all.

‘No expense spared,’ Nathaniel assured her, also taking in the ambience. ‘Did you see the band?’ He nodded towards a narrowboat, on top of which was a five-piece band, complete with saxophonist and drum kit, while Adam considered whether to go and sit down, before his legs failed him and he dropped down.

Trying to think calming thoughts and failing, he glanced at Nicole, who offered him a warm, supportive smile. Adam was grateful. It must have been hard for her, coming here, doing this, given she was supposed to be maid of honour at his last wedding.

‘Ah, here’s Phil,’ Nicole glanced towards the car park, ‘and your gorgeous little flower girl. What do you think?’

Adam followed her gaze to where Phil was guiding Lily-Grace carefully towards him. Concentrating on her footwork and the ivory rose and butterfly wand she was clutching to her chest, she didn’t notice Adam at first. When she did, she beamed him a smile which just about knocked his brand new black socks off. Adam’s chest swelled with pride as he looked her over. Wearing a dove coloured satin dress, a pink ribbon around her waist and a little pink butterfly adorning her hair, she looked totally adorable. ‘She’s perfect.’ He swallowed, wishing Emily could see her, suspecting she probably could.

Giving Lily a wide smile back, he caught Nicole’s eye. ‘Thanks,’ he said, certain that Nicole would know he was thanking her, not just for this, but for everything. One day little Lily would want explanations, information to fill in the gaps about her natural mother. Nicole, Phil and he had agreed she would have that information when she was ready, making sure she had all of the good stuff. For now, though, Lily was content with Nicole as Mummy, Sienna as Auntie, and two Daddies in her life.

‘She’s yours,’ Nicole said simply, reaching to squeeze his hand.

Adam nodded. There was no doubt about that in his mind, not anymore.

‘She’s here!’ Squeezing his hand hard enough now to stop his circulation, Nicole pulled his attention away from Lily to the carriage coming resplendently through the marina gates, led by two white horses, complete with plumes. Thank God. Adam allowed himself to breathe out.

‘Told you I’d do you proud, didn’t I?’ Nathaniel gave him a nudge, obviously as pleased as punch with the bridal transport, which had been his wedding gift.

‘You did, and some,’ Adam assured him, his heartbeat ratcheting up to a whole new level. His mouth dry, his legs now distinctly shaky, he tried to compose himself as he waited for the carriage to draw to a stop.

Also grey-suited, David appeared first, glancing towards Adam, his relief on finding him there, where he should be, apparent. Adam really couldn’t blame the man for that. Acknowledging him with a small nod, David turned back to the carriage, extending a hand for Sienna’s – and when his bride finally stepped down, Adam’s heart stopped beating.

‘Wow!’ Nathaniel whistled, also appreciating the view, then, ‘Breathe,’ he whispered sideways as David led Sienna towards them, Lauren close behind her, fussing and tweaking.

Pausing in front of them, David glanced proudly from his daughter to Adam. ‘Worth waiting for?’ he asked him.

Now definitely incapable of speaking, Adam nodded, his gaze fixed firmly on Sienna.

‘Sorry we’re so late,’ Lauren said, flapping at her side. ‘I couldn’t do a thing with her hair.’

Adam took in Sienna’s hair, magnificent, mesmerising red hair flecked gold, tumbling carelessly over her shoulders, her shy smile, her luminescent forest green eyes, her pretty freckles – he wanted to kiss every one of them, right there, right then. His eyes travelling downwards, sweeping the strapless dove satin dress, the pink ribbon positioned over her beautiful bump and under her far too tempting breasts, he swallowed hard. His woman, his friend, his lover, the mother of his soon-to-be-born child, she looked radiant, beautiful, utterly…

‘Stunning.’ He gulped back the tight lump in his throat – and promptly straightened his own tie.

Adam wasn’t surprised to see the white Chinchilla cat perched atop his boat when he turned after promising to give Sienna all of himself completely. He wasn’t surprised when it mewed and turned to pad silently off, casting him one last look with its all-seeing eyes as it went. Somehow he hoped he would, but Adam had a definite feeling he wouldn’t see Emily again.

She hadn’t been his guardian angel. She’d been Sienna’s. She’d kept her safe. She’d refused to go away until he knew that life without love in it was no life at all. Pretty mean feat for a ghost. Bye, Emily. He smiled inwardly. Part of him would always love her, too. He had a hunch she knew that.

He was surprised, and pleased, particularly for Sienna’s sake, to note their various neighbours gathered around, giving them a round of applause as they stepped down, the father of the rather better behaved teenagers applauding loudest of all, then giving Adam a wink and a thumbs up.

He was definitely surprised to see the woman he’d thought he might never see again there. His mother? Here? How? Adam watched, stunned, as she turned, obviously intending to slip quietly away unnoticed.

Seeing his shock, Sienna caught his hand. ‘She did keep in touch,’ she said, her wide green eyes looking apprehensively into his. ‘We did a little digging and …’ She looked to Nathaniel, who ferreted quickly in his pocket and produced a wad of envelopes.

‘Letters,’ he explained. ‘All returned unopened. There are more.’

Bewildered, Adam shook his head. He didn’t need to guess who’d returned them. Glancing after her, he felt something shift inside him, years of pent up bereavement, almost, that she hadn’t contacted him, hadn’t wanted anything to do with him, emotions he’d barely allowed himself to acknowledge. Uncertainly, he looked back towards Sienna, not sure what to do, how he went about reintroducing himself to his own mother at his wedding.

‘Go,’ Sienna urged him, stretching to plant a kiss on his cheek.

Glancing after her again, and then back to Sienna, Adam hesitated for a split second and then ran, not wanting her to reach the car park and disappear from his life once more, possibly forever.

‘Mum!’ he called, slowing as she reached the gates. ‘Mum?’ he said quietly again as she faltered and glanced down.

Adam still couldn’t quite believe she was here, that it was her, until she turned. And then he knew. She hadn’t left him by choice. She’d left because her alternative was to stay in an abusive relationship. He didn’t know what those letters contained, but he knew then that she hadn’t abandoned him.

‘Adam,’ she said tentatively, searching his face, a sadness in her eyes that went way beyond anything he’d ever seen as a child.

Too choked to say anything, Adam simply nodded.

‘You look …’ she paused, clearly trying not to cry ‘… all grown-up.’

Adam smiled reflectively. ‘Getting there,’ he said, hesitated, and then took a step towards her. ‘You look … exactly the same.’

‘Flatterer.’ She laughed, and dabbed at her cheek.

‘It’s one of my better qualities.’ Adam took a breath, took another step, and then welcomed his mother into his arms.

‘You have more. Many more, Adam Hamilton-Shaw,’ she assured him, glancing over his shoulder as she squeezed him tight. ‘Thank you,’ she mouthed at Sienna, who’d chosen her moment and was now coming towards them, Lily-Grace’s hand firmly in hers.

Sienna smiled, noting again how striking the woman’s espresso-coloured eyes were, warmth and obvious love shining therein. Adam was definitely his mother’s son. She hung back, giving them a moment, then, once the most important introduction was over and Adam turned, she stepped forward. ‘I think a certain little lady might be anxious to meet someone,’ she said, glancing down at their wide-eyed flower girl.

Adam’s delighted smile was priceless. ‘Mum,’ he said, bending to sweep Lily up into his arms, ‘this beautiful princess is my daughter, Lily-Grace. Lily, this is my mother.’

Lily regarded her shyly over her thumb, then, ‘Adum’s mum.’ She nodded, turning back to Adam. She studied him for a moment and then reached out her free hand to tentatively track a tear down his cheek. ‘Adum’s sad,’ she said, blinking curiously back at him.

‘No, sweetie. Adam’s happy,’ he assured her, causing her little brow to furrow. ‘Come on, we’d better join our guests before they eat all the cake.’

‘Everything all right, mate?’ Nathaniel asked as they strolled quietly back towards them, words somehow seeming superfluous.

‘Excellent,’ Adam replied, working to keep his emotions under control as he handed Lily to Nicole.

‘About time, too.’ Nathaniel gave Adam’s mum a conspiratorial wink. ‘Good luck, Adam,’ he said, reaching out to shake his friend’s hand heartily and then standing back to allow the father of the bride to do the same.

‘From me, too. Be happy,’ David said, over an emotional intake of breath. ‘And make sure my daughter is. Or you’ll have me to answer to.’

Adam laughed. He didn’t doubt it. ‘I will,’ he replied and reiterated firmly what he’d told the man once before. ‘For the rest of my life.’

* The End *
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