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Abigail’s body ached. Her hands were raw after a long night spent carrying the roped parcels of cloth up from the hold of The Lady Gin and helping lower them into the small row boats that would take them to shore and the storage tunnels under Swain Cove. She’d grown up slightly removed from the village, only entering the village for church on Sundays because that had been expected of the daughter of Lord Pencarrow. She had no notion that the village thrived on the smuggling trade. Now she was one of the locals, part of the long supply chain of people involved with avoiding import duties. She didn’t feel like a criminal; more like she—finally—belonged to a group of people who cared about her. Not only that, with these people, she was useful, not just pretty. Not an ornament.
Once the work was done, Francis had wrapped her hands in a cloth soaked in something that was supposed to help them heal. Abigail leaned on the front of The Lady Gin as they sailed into Swain Cove with the sunrise. If her brother could see her now, with her hair chopped shorter and in cheaper more practical clothes, he wouldn’t recognise her.
“You’d better go inside.” Tzipporah’s quiet command sent a cold shiver across the back of her neck. She might laugh about Tobias not recognising her, but it wasn’t enough to dress differently. If Lord Coxspeckle discovered her—here in Swain Cove—she would be forced to go back to being his wife. With one last glance at the sleepy village, she paced into the captain’s cabin. She picked up the pile of sewing and clumsily threaded a needle. The wrapping on her palms made everything difficult, but she wasn’t going to sit here and do nothing when Tzip and her crew were so busy outside. Had it only been a week since she’d fled Pencarrow House with only an evening gown? So much had happened in that time; she couldn’t go back to who she was before. She knew too much now, even though she’d only begun to learn more about herself. With every slow stitch as she patched the sail, Abigail tried not to worry about what might happen next. It was an impossibility and between the state of her hands and the tremble caused by knowing Lord Coxspeckle was out there somewhere looking for her, she made very slow progress, only managing one side of the patch when the door opened.
“Abigail, what are you doing here?” Thank goodness, it was only her brother, Tobias.
“Tzipporah had to do some business.” Abigail stood up, carefully placing her work on the table. She breathed out quickly; time to say this before she lost her nerve. “What were you thinking?”
“Me?”
“Yes. You told Tzipporah to take me to Italy. Were you going to ask me what I wanted?”
Tobias dipped his head slightly. “I assumed you wanted to be free from your brute of a husband.”
“I do. But Italy?”
“Mother lives in Naples.”
Abigail sat down. She blew out a long breath and relied on years of training to hide the way her stomach rolled with the unexpected—stunning—news. Not only was Mother alive, but Tobias knew where she was and had intended to send Abigail to stay with her.
“You might have said as much. I thought you were banishing me to a foreign country to live with a stranger.”
“Mother is a stranger.”
“And yet you know her place of abode. She’s never shared that with me.” Tobias was several years younger than her, but of course, he was the heir now that their oldest brother Gareth had died in the Peninsula War.
“She didn’t share it with me either. I simply used some connections to find her.” Was it better or worse to know that Tobias hadn’t been in communication with Mother?
Abigail closed her eyes for a moment and tried to settle the unsteady shake in her veins. When she opened her eyes again, Tobias hadn’t moved.
“Do you mean to inform me that you planned to send me to visit Mother without knowing if she’d have me? Don’t you think that is a little presumptuous? I haven’t seen her since I was a child.” Presumptuous on either side. She didn’t need to say that Mother had already rejected her once before; the chances of her doing the same again weren’t small. How dare Tobias declare what either her or Mother might need?
Tobias stiffened. “I assumed; rightly or wrongly; that she would understand your situation and have some empathy for her only daughter.”
“Italy is a long way to travel without knowing what reception I might receive.”
“Forty days sailing, give or take.” Tzipporah poked her head into the cabin. “We can go if you want.”
But that was the crux of the problem; Abigail didn’t know what she wanted. She would likely be safe if she lived with Mother in Italy, but would she be happy? For the first time in her life, in the last few days, she’d had a taste of what happiness might be like.
“You should probably go. Lord Coxspeckle is still in residence at Pencarrow House.”
Abigail gasped. “You might have opened with that rather pertinent point.” Her heart pounded.
“He believes your kidnappers will bring you to Pencarrow House when he refused to pay the ransom.” Tobias grimaced.
“He knows the kidnapping note was fake?” Tzipporah asked.
“No. He’s quite chuffed that someone thought him important enough to kidnap his wife, although he doesn’t seem in a hurry to get you returned to him.”
Abigail’s stomach sank. She knew why. “He wants me dead.”
Tobias frowned but Tzipporah nodded. She understood.
“Tobias, you don’t need to look confused. It’s straightforward. As far as my wifely duties go, I have failed Lord Coxspeckle in the most obvious way. I have not produced an heir in nearly a decade of marriage, and as such it would suit him if I died. He could marry again. Perhaps a well-connected fertile widow whose breeding capability is already proven.” She paused, letting the truth sink in.
“That’s appalling.”
Abigail shrugged. “You grew up in our world. How could not see that this is the way your peers treat their wives? I sincerely hope you treat your own wife better.”
“I will not be marrying.”
Tzipporah guffawed and Abigail stared at them both.
“No, I imagine Hiram would be most upset with you if you married.” Tzipporah’s grin grew.
“Quiet.”
“Oh, your sister doesn’t know that your lover is my brother?” The casual way Tzipporah mentioned the illegal relationship was yet another sign Abigail knew nothing much about the world. She’d never suspected Tobias might ... not want to marry for those reasons. With a shake of her head, she pushed away her ignorance; given her own willingness to kiss Tzipporah, the same types of desires must exist for some men too. Including her brother.
“Careful.” Tobias warned.
“It’s not exactly a secret, Tobias. You and Hiram have been in each other’s pockets since you were twelve. I’m only surprised it took you both so long to admit the truth to each other.”
“Tzip; my sister...”
“Is not as innocent as you might assume. She’s spent years being beaten by a cruel man, and yet she kisses like a dream.”
Abigail’s face was on fire. She wanted to hide under the small table in the cabin or perhaps jump overboard and just sink to the bottom of the sea. It didn’t matter that Tobias knew she enjoyed kissing women, but for him to know that she’d kissed Tzipporah... That was too much, but Tobias only shook his head.
“Tzipporah. You might have a person in every port and good on you. I refuse to let you play with my sister’s affections too.”
A loud roar rang in Abigail’s ears. “Stop. I can make my own decisions.”
The smile on Tzipporah’s face was worth the heart-pounding, nerve-wracking effort that came with standing up for herself. Before this week, Abigail would have let Tobias speak on her behalf because she had been trained to place no value on her own thoughts. No more.
Just as Tobias opened his mouth to respond, Hiram burst through the door.
“Time to go.”
“What?”
“He’s here. Come, let’s set sail.” The three rushed out of the cabin, leaving Abigail standing uselessly in the middle of the room. She hovered, wanting to go and help them, but knowing her ignorance about The Lady Gin would slow them down. And she didn’t want to be seen by him.
It wasn’t long until The Lady Gin began to move with the now familiar feel of the lugger sailing under Abigail’s feet. Her first couple of steps were a little unsteady as she walked to the cabin door, then she held the door tight as she slowly opened it and peered out.
“Did we get away?”
“Stay.” Tzipporah hissed at her and she closed the door again. Almost as soon as she’d closed it, it opened again and Tobias slipped inside.
“We got away in time. Lord Coxspeckle is currently standing on the wharf yelling at The Lady Gin.”
“Are we fast enough?”
Tobias grinned. “The Lady Gin is one of the fastest luggers on the sea. Hiram built her.” Pride infused his voice and Abigail suddenly had no doubt that the two men were lovers. A flicker of embarrassment that she’d ever told him he must marry quickly dissipated. Lord Coxspeckle was too close for her to be able to relax.
“I need to talk to Tzipporah.” Abigail pushed past her brother and walked onto the deck of The Lady Gin. Tzipporah stood at the wheel, tall and confident, as she steered The Lady Gin towards the open sea. Abigail tore her gaze away from Tzipporah. Oh dear. They hadn’t made much progress. She could still make out Lord Coxspeckle’s face as he stood at the end of the wharf. He...
“He’s planning something.”
Tzipporah glanced over her shoulder, back at the wharf, and then shouted some instructions to Francis and Dinesh. They rushed to raise one of the sails.
“What’s the matter?”
“We are heading into the wind, so we have to tack to make any progress. I’d estimate our speed to be less than two knots.”
“And?”
“A healthy fit person can row a small boat at up to four knots, so it would be possible for him to catch us if he starts soon.”
Abigail swayed on her feet. “He takes pride in his fitness. Please don’t underestimate him.” Lord Coxspeckle might be in his early forties, but he spent much of his day boxing, fencing, and riding. He was vain about his appearance, and she had no doubt that he’d easily catch them in a rowboat.
“He’s doing it. He’s in a rowboat.”
Tzipporah shrugged her shoulder. “I can’t go any faster. We’ll just have to make sure he doesn’t board us. We have the advantage of being higher in the water than him, and we have more crew to stop him boarding.”
Abigail hoped it was true.
“Sit here. We will keep you safe, dear sister.” Tobias offered Abigail a wooden box and she sat down. Once more automatically doing as she was told. She almost stood up again, just to defy that trained obedience, but she didn’t want to faint or do anything silly; not with him so close. She needed all her wits and strength—for what that might be worth.
Time stretched out as everyone watched Lord Coxspeckle’s tiny rowboat slowly close the gap to The Lady Gin. Tzipporah tacked the lugger back and forth, trying to catch the breeze. If there hadn’t been so much as stake, Abigail might have gone to sleep as it was painfully slow; rather like watching two snails race along a windowsill. But she couldn’t jest about this. With every stroke Lord Coxspeckle made, he inched closer to The Lady Gin. Closer to a reckoning where she would lose. She always lost when it came to him. Knowing that so many people were working hard to help her didn’t help at all. She pressed her hands into her lap, unable to relax.
“You look like a painting of the perfect lady,” Tobias said.
“Excuse me?” She had the childish urge to lean backwards and slouch but of course her body was far too taut for that.
“Perhaps you should hide below deck while we dispatch him.”
“No.” Abigail refused to let everyone else solve her problems. From now on, she would be like Tzipporah. Capable. She stood up, them immediately sat down again when her knees shook. “Let him come to me.” They were losing the race, and perhaps this was the confrontation she needed to have for her own sake.
“You want him to board?”
“Yes. I need to tell him that this marriage is over. I’m not a scared rabbit fleeing for my life anymore.” She was fleeing for her life and this bravado stung her tongue as if she’d eaten too much horseradish. “Besides, you are all here as back up. I need to say this.”
“This is an ill-advised decision.”
Abigail’s ears rang and her vision clouded over. “I. Do. Not. Care. For once in my life, let me make my own decisions. Bad or otherwise.”
A little cheer cut through the buzzing sound. Tzipporah touched her on the shoulder.
“Stand up.”
Abigail stood. This time, she stayed upright.
“You are making a very brave decision. It might look like we are losing this race, but he will tire eventually, and we have all the advantages. He can only board The Lady Gin if we allow him to do so.”
“I have to tell him it’s over. I’m not returning to be his wife. I want him to hear it.” Abigail’s knees still shook but she kept her chin high.
“Then you will need a knife.”
“No.” Tobias said. “This is incredibly unwise. We are much better off by letting him get tired and preventing him for boarding. I won’t have you placed in danger.”
Abigail sneered. “Just like you prevented me from being in danger throughout my entire marriage? No, you were swanning around the continent enjoying your life while I was living in hell. I will make this decision.” To her great satisfaction, Tobias stepped backwards, and shook his head. She didn’t want to hear his excuses.
“Take this.” Tzipporah bent down and pulled a small knife from her boot. “Hold it like this.” She placed the handle of the knife in Abigail’s palm and curled her fingers around it. The knife sat against the bandages protecting her hands. Did it feel clumsy because it was her first time holding a weapon? Or was it simply the way her hands were wrapped?
“That’s it?”
“Yes. This knife won’t provide much protection unless he gets very close. Then just jab it as hard as you can into any soft part of his body. It won’t kill him, but it should cause enough pain that he’ll move away from you for long enough that someone can assist you.”
Abigail nodded. If she didn’t think too hard about it, and just responded—like Tzipporah said—she had one last defence if Lord Coxspeckle didn’t listen to her. Was it too much to ask that he listen? Most likely but she had to try. She couldn’t give up a whole lifetime of polite conversation in a matter of a week.
“Like this.” Tzipporah kept her hand wrapped around Abigail’s and guided Abigail’s hand through the motion of sticking the knife into Lord Coxspeckle. She couldn’t do this.
“You can do it, but hopefully you won’t need to.” Tzipporah’s reassurance helped a little bit. With a shaky breath inwards, she nodded.
“Thank you.”
Tzipporah lowered Abigail’s hand so it hung at her side, then she arranged Abigail’s skirt so her hand and the knife were hidden in the fabric.