34

Trevor joined Alex and Nish on the balcony. ‘So you know what the plan is? Alex asked.

‘Yep. We’re gonna work her whole bear scientist angle into act two then I’m gonna fuck her in the hot tub.’

‘I meant for getting her to Libya.’

‘Yep. Go to the fake lawyers, sign the fake contracts with the fake agent, buy her some nice shit in Rodeo Drive, then I fuck her again. Maybe in the ass. Then get the plane to Istanbul, then get the plane to Libya where the production assistant will take us out to the location for the first shoot.’

‘Got it. Just go easy on the fucking,’ Alex said.

‘That’s fine. She gets raped by a bear in act one. But she loves the bear so forgives him and teaches him sign language. That’s like Gorillas in the Mist. Pure Oscar winning shit. Apart from the bear fucking. That’s just gratuitous bestiality for the director’s cut. You’ve got to get the rape in there somehow or there’s no chance for awards.’

‘You’re a very fucked-up individual, you know that Trevor,’ Alex said with a sigh.

‘Yes,’ Trevor replied deadpan.

‘Yes you are, or yes you know?’

‘Yes and yes. So are you money-pigs done now? We’ve got creative avenues to explore in the cinematic realm, and I’m just dying to get balls deep into those sweet ass cheeks.’

‘We’ll leave you to it. Just try not to get arrested for doing some weird shit before you get to Libya Trevor. This is important,’ Alex said.

‘She loves me. I’m her ticket to the fucking red carpet boys. She will suck my dick like a Harley sucks gas from its tank.’

‘Just get a written consent eh? This is still fucking California,’ Nish said.

‘She won’t remember a thing. Don’t worry. I supply this shit to all the top directors and producers. Complete amnesia. Hundred per cent success rate. Not a single sexual assault or rape allegation since the day I formulated it. I say I formulated it, but it was The Agency. I just stole it from their lab. That’s the shit F.E.M.A will give everyone when the time comes to liberate the planet for the one per cent and euthanize us all.’

Alex and Nish headed through to the lounge where Megan was excitedly reading through the script. ‘What do you think?’ Nish asked.

‘Oh this is just so amazing! Trevor is so talented I can see why he got so many awards! I’m so lucky to have the opportunity to work with him. This is the best thing that happened to me! I love you guys!’ Megan got up and excitedly hugged and kissed them both.

‘Just a word of caution, he’s a little out there sometimes. Don’t let him drink bleach with his vodka. Or snort any kind of cleaning powders. Directors, you know...’ Nish said drawing a deep breath.

‘Oh ya I get it totally. They get fucked-up right? They’re just so fucking sick! Awesome. Everyone is going to be so jealous.’

‘Well. Good luck with the writing and we’ll see you on set in Libya,’ Alex said.

‘I can’t wait!’ She hugged and kissed them again. They headed outside to the waiting car. ‘Do you think he’s got this?’ Alex asked.

‘I think he was made for that job,’ Nish replied.

‘He knows he’s not making a film right? Just method acting.’

‘I wouldn’t worry, I doubt there’s a market for a California scientist who gets fucked by a bear and teaches it sign language in the Libyan Desert, even in Hollywood.’