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Thomas grinned as he jumped William’s piece, “Crown me king!”
William grabbed one of the checkers he had taken, not that there were many, and crowned Thomas’ piece. He then leaned back, contemplating the board. He was sitting on the edge of the bed, playing with Thomas on the small table Mrs. Stanton... Anna, he reminded himself, had pulled over.
“Lucky move,” he commented, trying to decide which piece to move. He only had three left and it looked like he would lose whichever piece he moved. Sighing, he picked one and moved it.
“Ha!” Thomas shouted, making Anna, who was sitting across the room, jump. Thomas grabbed his king and jumped; once, twice, thrice... then swept all three of William’s pieces from the board. “I win!”
William pasted a smile on his face as he stared at the board; he was really starting to dislike this game. “Great move Thomas.”
“I think Mr. Stone is getting tired, Thomas.” Anna spoke from the kitchen.
William looked over at her, meeting her gaze; he smiled appreciatively.
She gave a half smile, and then looked back to Thomas, “He probably needs some rest. Maybe you should go check on your chickens?”
“Yes’m...” Thomas grinned, offering his hand to William, “Great game Mr. William. Maybe we can play more later on.”
William nodded, shaking the offered hand. “Sure Thomas...”
Thomas ran to the door and jammed his feet into his boots as he ripped his coat from the hook. He barely got them on before opening the door, and running out into the snow, barely remembering to slam the door shut behind him.
William shivered as the cold blast of air blew through the room.
“You should lie down.”
He looked back over to the kitchen where Anna had been working at the stove for hours on dinner. He opened his mouth to respond, but was interrupted by the door banging open. Thomas yelled in, “Ma, Mr. Earl and Mr. James are coming up the trail...”
Anna barely had time to respond with a “Thank you,” before Thomas slammed the door shut.
She shook her head, smiling, “That boy.” She glanced at William and added, “Are you up for visitors?”
******************
“...AND THEN THE FOOL TRIED to ride off without paying, and the storekeeper shot him out of the saddle!”
Anna gasped, “James! That’s horrible!”
They were all crowded in the main room; Thomas drug several chairs from the kitchen table in so they could all sit with William.
James held up his hand, “That’s not the best part. When he shot, he knocked the guy out of the saddle, but didn’t realize his shot only ricocheted off the thief’s gun. The storekeeper had never shot anyone; he just assumed that if you shot them, they were dead.” He paused, laughing aloud before continuing, “Well, that thief got up and started running down the street. The storekeeper turned white as a sheet, and passed out on the boardwalk.” He slapped the table, laughing hard as he looked over at William. “Parson, you remember Archibald Jackson? How he would pass out and wet himself every time a cannon shot off?” He laughed again, a boisterous sound that echoed in the room.
William gave a tentative half smile. He did remember the man; Archibald had died at the battle for Chattanooga when they attacked Tunnel Hill. He remembered holding the man’s hand as he bled out on the side of the road. Shaking off the memory, he looked around; Earl was laughing almost as much as his brother and Anna was smiling softly as she listened to the pair. He had to admit, they were an interesting pair; Earl was around sixty, and James was in his early thirties. James had told him that his brother was commonly thought to be his father; now he could see why.
Glancing over, he caught Thomas’ eye. He was sitting quietly on the hearth watching William quizzically.
William shot a questioning look at him, but he only shrugged in response, not moving.
“What’s wrong, Thomas?” Anna spoke up from her seat. She had evidently noticed the exchange.
James and Earl fell quiet as the attention turned to Thomas.
He blushed slightly, and then asked “Why does Mr. James always call Mr. William ‘Parson?’”
There was an uncomfortable silence for several seconds before William spoke, “It was a nickname they gave me a long time ago, Thomas.”
“Is it because you like the Bible so much?”
William laughed softly, nodding. “That was probably the reason.”
They all sat quietly for a few moments, until Anna stood, “Would anyone like some more coffee?”
William declined, leaning back against the pillows and tried to get comfortable. James and Earl started talking again, as Anna refilled their cups; this time about a drunk who shot a horse while out hunting.
Staring at the ceiling, he tried to tune them out. He felt frustrated suddenly. He didn’t know why it bothered him, he grunted, closing his eyes. Of course he knew, he just didn’t want to admit why. He should be a parson. He remembered the day he had told his father he felt called to preach. It was not long after the war started. He and Joe had both been accepted to West Point. William had been trying to figure out a way to explain to his father why he couldn’t go, when his father had pulled them both into his office to convince them to sign up for the Army immediately, instead of going to West Point. He was afraid the war would be over before they graduated.
Afraid they would miss out on an opportunity to shower him with their glory.
He had quietly spoken of his call to his father, but he exploded in anger. William could still hear the words hurled at him in rage...“I will not have one of my sons be a lace wearing, sissy Priest!”
After several days of arguing, William relented, finally signing up for the Army with Joe, and heading off to war. The agreement was if he fought in the war, then his father would support him in whatever he did.
Of course, the only reason William joined was for his Mother and Joe. His father would have disowned him otherwise, and he would never have seen them again.
He huffed a quiet laugh; he could see how well that decision worked out...
“Are you alright, William?”
He opened his eyes. Anna was standing near, a concerned look on her face. “Are you alright?”
He rubbed his eyes, “I’m just tired,” he offered lamely.
James stood suddenly, “Well, we better get moving.” He drained his coffee and set the cup on the table. “Got a big day ahead.”
William shook hands with both men before lying down. He faced the wall, listening as they made their exit. He lay there for a long time, and tried hard to not think about the past.
******************
ANNA STOOD NERVOUSLY at the end of the short hallway, twisting her fingers. She could tell he was still awake, but she didn’t know if she should bother him. Finally, she took a deep breath and asked quietly, “Does it bother you to talk about the war?”
William rolled over slowly to face her, his features tight. “No... not exactly.” He gave a half shrug, “I just...” He trailed off, looking back at the ceiling.
“We can talk another time if you want, I know you are tired.”
He glanced back at her, “No, its fine. I’m not really tired.” He sat up, propping himself against the pillow.
She hesitated before speaking, she felt... intrusive... “I just noticed that it seemed to bother you a lot tonight,” She gave an apologetic shrug, “Was it because of your brother?”
He took a long time before answering, seeming to think before responding. “That’s part of it. Everyone remembers the war differently. Some keep the good memories; the rest of us live with the bad ones.”
“What was it like?”
“Ugly.”
She moved in to the main room, sitting in her chair across from him. They sat in silence for several minutes; the only sound was the crackling of the fire in the hearth. Finally, Anna asked tentatively, “Can I ask a question?”
He shrugged with a smile, “Sure.”
Looking down uncomfortably, Anna took time to choose her words carefully, “James mentioned you used to be a...”
“Parson?” He cut her off with a soft laugh.
Looking up, she gave an apologetic smile; hoping he wasn’t offended.
He said simply, “I was... once.”
“Why not now? The war?”
“Not exactly...” shrugging, he added, “It was me.”
She watched his facial expressions carefully; worried he would be upset with her for asking. “What happened?”
He shook his head, “A lot of death, a lot of killing; you get to the point where you realize you are better suited to some vocations more than others.”
“And you felt you were better suited for?”
“War.” He stated simply, looking up before he added, “My father was right; being a parson ill suited me.
“He told you that?” she asked incredulously
William laughed aloud before responding, “You would have to know my father. He raised us to be soldiers. Nothing else was allowed to suit us.”
“But you tried?”
He shrugged, “Yeah, Mother had always taken Joe and me to Church; father was never interested. I had given my heart to Christ, and felt He wanted me to preach the Gospel so I went to talk to father... and he convinced me otherwise.” He huffed out a sarcastic laugh, “Good thing too. He was right.”
She didn’t say anything for several seconds. Then finally asked, “Why didn’t you stay in the Army then?”
He laughed grimly, “Just because it suited me, didn’t mean I wanted to do it. I wanted to be as far as I could from it. It just proved I couldn’t do the other.”
“Oh.”
She stood and walked over to the hearth, throwing in another log. More to keep herself busy than actual need. As she sat back down, she watched him for a few moments as he stared at the fire.
“What about you?” He asked suddenly, still staring at the fire. “What were you before all of this?”
She smiled softly, “I was a young girl in love. Clay built ships for my father, and we met one day in my father’s office.” She laughed, “I was quite smitten.”
“And your father let you move all the way out here?”
“Yes. It was Clay’s dream to move west; my father was accepting of it.”
William’s eyes narrowed suddenly, “Too bad all Fathers aren’t that way...”
“What do you mean?”
He shook his head, “Bad memories. I haven’t spoken with my father since I came home from the war.”
“Why?”
William simply shrugged, looking back into the fire.
Anna thought she understood. He probably blamed his father for his brother’s death. She opened her mouth to ask, when he started speaking,
“When the war broke out, he encouraged us to both join, so we wouldn’t miss the chance to fight. When I told him I wanted to preach, he threatened to never allow me to see Joe or Mother again if I refused...”
“And your brother Joe was killed in battle?” she asked softly
“And mother died of a broken heart when she received the news.”
“I’m so sorry...”
He waved a hand dismissively, “It was years ago now... its fine.”
She nodded before asking, “Is that why you won’t speak to him?”
“Yeah...” He looked over at her suddenly, “What about you? Do you talk to your parents?”
Embarrassed, she shook her head, looking down at her lap, “No... not since...” She unconsciously touched the scarf, pulling it closer to her face.
“You need to stop that.”
“What?”
He gestured to her face, “The thing with the scarf, you worry about it too much.”
She felt her face flame with embarrassment and turned away from him, “I’m sorry it bothers you,” She stood, mortified, and moved to leave the room.
“Anna, stop.”
She paused, still facing the hallway. She could feel the tears welling at the corner of her eyes. She didn’t know why it hurt so much that he had to point out her... problems.
“Anna, please look at me.”
She turned slightly, enough so she could see him. “What?”
He blew out a long breath before answering. “The only thing that bothers me is that you think you have to hide.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means you spend way too much time hiding behind that scarf.”
She spun around frowning. “Don’t mock me! You know why I wear this.” She could feel the trickle of tears run down her cheeks as she faced him.
He nodded, “Exactly, which is why you don’t need it.” He paused briefly before adding, “Anna, you got hurt. That’s horrible, but anyone that thinks badly of you for that is someone you shouldn’t be concerned about anyway. The people that love you... your family, your friends ... none of us care.”
She turned to leave the room, pausing at the edge of the hallway before quietly responding, “Thank you, William.”
******************
