Once I was processed and handed my meager bag of belongings, the door clicked open and I was allowed to leave the prison grounds for the first time in over a year. It was the simplest thing to be buzzed out of the metal doors, but it felt monumental. It had been so long since I had been outside of the prison’s walls that a surreal feeling overcame me as I breezed through the perimeter doors.
Even though I had enjoyed outdoor time every day while I was imprisoned, this was different. The air was somehow fresher, cleaner, and more life-affirming out here. It felt so odd to be able to go wherever I wanted to. I’d become so used to being restricted in my activity and living space that the idea of being able to wander around was exulting.
I noticed everything… the birds chirping, the wind tickling my face, the sun warming me. The scent of fresh-cut grass hung heavy in the air. The colors of the trees, sky, and flowers seemed more vivid. The strong smells and sights assaulted my senses, and I was truly grateful for each and every one.
It dawned on me that I had taken so many wonderful things for granted before my incarceration. I stood on the prison sidewalk and vowed to always take the time to appreciate the little things in my life.
As I looked around, I realized that I didn’t know what to do next. I’d been secretly hoping that Tanya would surprise me by showing up to give me a ride, but I didn’t see her car. It had been presumptuous of me to think that she might be here. After all, she had her own life and was probably working or busy.
I walked down the sidewalk, trying to figure out my next move. I no longer had a cell phone, so it wasn’t like I could call a cab. Turning back towards the prison, I realized that I should have asked to use the desk phone to call someone. After briefly considering going back in to do so, I decided that I would rather walk than go back inside that building.
Almost as if I conjured it from thin air, a car and driver pulled up in front of the prison. “Becca?” The clean-cut driver asked me.
“Umm, yeah,” I answered dumbly, not quite able to comprehend that he was here for me.
My first thought was that Aunt Bea and the girls had somehow arranged this, but I nixed that idea because it would be next to impossible to coordinate this from inside prison. I considered the idea that Tanya had sent the car for me, but quickly decided that, unless she had come into some money over the past year, she couldn’t afford it.
Did the prison provide rides for just-released inmates as a parting gift? If they did, it was a much-needed service and a nice touch. As bare-boned as everything was on the inside, I couldn’t imagine that was the case.
The driver asked where I would like to be dropped off. After rattling off the address, I sat back and enjoyed being whisked around on four wheels. One of the many things that I had never dreamed I would miss was riding in a car.
As we drove, I found myself wondering if the driver had ever picked up anyone at the prison before. He had to be curious about what I had been locked up for. Did he think he had a hardened criminal in his back seat?
He didn’t ask me any questions about my stint in prison, and for that, I was very grateful. Instead, we rode in silence, while I looked around at the scenery whizzing past the car’s windows. It was sensory overload to see so much at once after only staring at the same drab prison facility and worn patches of grass for so long, but I didn’t want to miss a second of it.
Before long, we pulled up at the address I had requested. I thanked him awkwardly and wondered if I was supposed to give him a tip. Since I didn’t have any money, it wasn’t an option, but the worry still made my brow furrow.
As if sensing my concern, he smiled and said, “All taken care of. Have a wonderful day, ma’am.”
I gave him a genuine smile in return. It felt good to be treated like a real human being. He could have judged me for having been in prison, but instead, he chose to take the high road and be pleasant and professional. I silently hoped that others would also be so kind.
Once I walked inside the facility, it was all I could do to keep from running down to Nana’s room. I was so excited to see her, even though I had no idea how I was going to explain my extended absence.
Her room was empty, so I stopped a passing nurse to ask where Nana would be at this time of day. It wasn’t lost on me that living in this facility and following their institutional schedule was not unlike what I had just left, but I tried to not to think too much about that.
The nurse had tired eyes, but she gave me an odd grin when she answered. “I think she’s down in the recreation room.”
“Okay, thanks.” I was already scurrying down the hall to find my Nana before the second word escaped my lips.
I nearly fell over with shock when I rounded the corner to the rec room and a hodgepodge group of elderly people shouted, “Surprise!”
Someone had hand-painted a sign that read, “Welcome Home, Becca!” Their spacing was a little off, so the words narrowed and got much smaller by the end, but it was obvious that quite a bit of effort had gone into it.
Nana and Glenn were beaming at me from behind a rickety card table that held a lopsided chocolate cake, paper plates, white plastic forks, red Solo cups and two gallon-sized jugs of orange drink. The others in the room half-heartedly clapped from their seats.
A crotchety-looking man in a wheelchair grouched, “She’s here. Can we finally eat that cake?” When my Nana nodded to indicate that the cake was now fair game, the man nearly ran over my foot with one of his chair’s wheels in his effort to be first in line for a slice.
The patient-looking nurse chastised him lightly for being in such a hurry, but she cut a large wedge of cake for the man and handed it to him on a plate with a fork. Evidently having the only thing he wanted from this party, he set the plate on his lap and wheeled his way out of the room.
Shrugging his shoulders, Glenn said loud enough for the retreating man to hear, “Just ignore that old grouch.”
Nana scooted around the table and came towards me with her arms outstretched for a hug. It felt so good to be in her warm embrace, I squeezed my eyes shut as a few happy tears escaped and trailed down my cheeks. Her soft, knitted sweater felt so good against my cheek as I lightly rested my head against her frail shoulder.
“I missed you so much,” I whispered near her ear as I savored her familiar scent of baby powder and Pond’s Cold Cream.
“Oh, I missed you too, Sweet Girl,” she told me, still hugging me close. “I’m so glad you’re back.”
I wondered what she had been told about my whereabouts. I had left out where I was going in my letter to her. Had she been told the truth? Shame burned bright on my cheeks as I thought about my horrible lack of judgment and my subsequent prison term. The thought of disappointing and embarrassing Nana was worse than ten years in prison would have been.
My thoughts were interrupted when two new people rushed into the room. I looked up, not quite able to believe my eyes. Cade was holding Cammie’s hand and they were both out of breath from running. “Is she here?” His eyes quickly scanned the room.
Our gazes locked, and a thrill raced down my spine at the sight of him. As much as I had daydreamed about him while I was in prison, the reality of Cade’s presence was even more staggering than the dreamy version of him my imagination had conjured. I felt completely bowled over by his charisma. He oozed sexual magnetism, even from across the room.
I held myself back, even though I longed to run into his arms. I didn’t know what he was doing here, but I was confident that he hadn’t suddenly forgiven me for my contribution to the bank heist.
During my time in prison, I had plenty of time to think about how stupid it was to agree to take any part in it. While I had managed to convince myself at the time that it was a victimless crime, it could have so easily gone horribly wrong. If anyone had been injured, I never would have been able to forgive myself.
Cammie ran over to me and wrapped her tiny arms around my waist. I hugged the girl back, dumbfounded that she would remember me or consider giving me an embrace. I had assumed that Cade had told her that I was a bad person and to stay away from me. I was even more shocked when Cammie released her grip on me and ran over to hug my Nana.
The two of them started an excited conversation in sign language. “You know ASL?” I blurted out, in awe that Nana had learned this new skill at her age.
“Of course,” she seemed affronted by my surprise. “I have to be able to communicate with my sweet girl.” The two of them beamed at each other as I marveled at how seamlessly Nana had begun signing as she spoke, in order to include Cammie in the conversation.
Apparently, I had missed a lot while I was away. The realization that Cade had most likely brought Cammie to visit Nana, so the older woman wouldn’t be too lonely during my absence, made me see even more what a great guy he was––too bad I had ruined any chance of being with him by agreeing to be a part of that stupid crime.
I turned to give him an appreciative glance. He had truly gone above and beyond for my grandmother, despite the fact that he hated me. I owed him for that, so I silently vowed to find some way to repay him, even though he most likely wanted nothing to do with me.
Although I expected his return gaze to be cold and lacking emotion, I discovered a surprising amount of warmth in it. When he stepped forward and spoke to our little group, he surprised me yet again. “We’re all so glad to have you back from the Peace Corps.”
He enunciated the last two words to make sure I understood that is what the story had been. I was touched that he had covered for me. Although it felt wrong to lie to Nana about where I had been for the last year, I knew the truth would devastate her. I was fairly certain that the Peace Corps required more than a year away from home, but I didn’t point out that flaw in the cover story that had been devised for me.
“Yes, we want to hear all about your travels and adventures!” Nana tenderly patted my cheek.
I didn’t want to embellish stories about good deeds I had been doing, so I was incredibly grateful when Cade swooped in and saved me again. “Oh, there will be plenty of time for that.” He spoke and signed to the group at large. “Right now, it’s cake and ice cream time!”
Cammie jumped up and down with excitement about that as her father had most likely known she would. The distraction worked. Glenn went to retrieve the vanilla bean ice cream from the freezer, and then we all focused on eating our dessert treat and celebrating our reunion.
It dawned on me as we chatted that Glenn was the strong, silent type, which was a perfect match for my talkative Nana. When he did speak, everyone paused and listened because his booming voice commanded attention.
Nana made the ASL signs with her hands to translate as Glenn spoke. “Everyone, we have an announcement to make.” He paused for dramatic effect before adding, “Gloria Jean has agreed to become my wife.”
It made me smile that he utilized Nana’s first and middle name. I hadn’t heard anyone call her that since her uptight sister, who had passed away when I was still just a youngster. The happy look on Nana’s face was all the confirmation I needed that Glenn would be a wonderful addition to our tiny family.
We talked and laughed for quite a while. It was an even better reunion with my beloved Nana than I could have hoped for. The only mar on what would have been a perfect afternoon was Cade’s silence. He hadn’t yet spoken directly to me, and I dreaded facing the anger and hatred he would most likely spew at me once we were alone.
I knew I deserved whatever spite he tossed in my direction, so I steeled myself for the onslaught.