Chapter Nine

Heat squirmed under his skin, pounding against his skull as it prickled each and every nerve. He was sure he reeked—scents soaking into the blankets and walls until everything was saturated with it. Sweat dripped over him, driving him mad with each meandering tickle over his skin that was raw and aching.

It’s never been this bad before.

He pressed his head into a fresh patch of cool sheets, but it was hot almost instantly, sticking to his forehead in an uncomfortable mess.

Three weeks early, his heat licked under his flesh, raging hotter and longer than he’d ever remembered. Usually, he ran a slight temperature for two days, was wet for no reason and had the inexplicable urge to be close to someone, but he’d never ached before. His gut wasn’t usually so tight, clenching deep within as the skin on the back of his neck itched and burned.

He’d studied mating bonds in his classes before, and it wasn’t uncommon for an omega to start a heat after being mated. It was a time when most young couples got pregnant for the first time. But he’d never really understood the why.

Now I do. He groaned, rubbing his belly as it ached and grumbled. He was starving, but anything he’d put past his lips had come up shortly after.

The pounding music in the house didn’t help. It wasn’t the boys’ fault. They knew his schedule and when to keep strangers out of the house, but they probably had no idea that he’d spent the last two days squirming in his bed with no end in sight. He’d been keeping to his room for the last week, darting away from the door whenever someone knocked and refusing to turn on his phone.

If there was an emergency, his family knew where to find him, even if he wasn’t quite sure if he was speaking to them yet.

The beat of the music changed, this time strong enough to shake his door. He gritted his teeth, covering his ears but it didn’t help. His head pounded with each pulse that struck straight to his chest, vibrating against something that was cold and stark.

Letting out a growl, Vale pulled himself out of bed, standing naked for a full minute as his vision swam. Lying in bed obviously wasn’t going to help, and there was no way in hell that he was calling Zyke. He’d already done enough damage to their relationship that he wasn’t going to risk any more.

He pulled on a pair of dark and loose shorts, whimpering at the way they scraped against his skin. The T-shirt was even harder to put on, instantly sticking to him uncomfortably. But he couldn’t be alone for another moment. Maybe Sander or Caleb wouldn’t mind snuggling with him, even for a short time.

Opening his door was like welcoming a wave of scents that hadn’t managed to seep into his room. Someone was fucking somewhere close by, and a party-goer had broken the ‘no smoking in the house’ rule. Anger curled in his gut as he stomped toward the stairs.

A swirl of emotions flickered over his skin, half of them making no sense. It’s just the heat. But it couldn’t be. It had never been this bad. He’d never been so pissed at his housemates for being exactly who they were. It wasn’t past curfew, and it wasn’t even a weeknight. They hadn’t done anything wrong.

Vale growled at a couple who were kissing on the stairs. It was two omegas, which somehow made it worse with the cloud of slick. “Get out.”

They didn’t stick around to ask questions, their eyes wide as they quickly retreated. He must’ve looked half insane for them to act that way.

He met the first alpha in the living room.

His back was turned, but Vale didn’t need to see his face to know what he was. He was instantly grateful for grabbing the darkest shorts as he felt the wetness between his cheeks. The alpha snapped his head up, instantly turning toward Vale as he took in a deep breath through his nose.

Of course, it has to be him. Vale wasn’t sure what Wendelin was doing here. He’d never come to one of the parties. Vale would have noticed and probably would have stalked him through the house a little bit just to stare at his ass. But now Wendelin’s gaze was on him, his pupils going wide against pale green.

“Oh, Vale!”

Vale blinked as a small omega stepped past Wendelin, probably inadvertently putting himself between them. It’s probably for the best. It took him a moment to remember Teddy, the pregnant omega he’d met at the party that had felt like a lifetime ago.

Vale grumbled, the noise rising in his throat until Teddy drew to a stop. Teddy scrunched his nose, before bringing his hand up to half-cover his face.

“You shouldn’t be here,” said Teddy, glancing over his shoulder at Wendelin before stepping toward Vale. “You’re in heat, Vale. There are a lot of alphas here. You’re gonna cause a fight, smelling so desperate like that.”

When Teddy’s hand touched him, Vale let out a snarl. He didn’t want to be touched—not by him. He barely managed to keep from striking out and losing himself to the rage.

Teddy jumped back as if he’d been burned, holding his hand to his chest. “Oh, crap.” His eyes went wide as he looked around the room, suddenly panicked. “Where’s your mate, Vale? I know I don’t know you all that well, but you need him. You’re nearly feral.”

The word ‘mate’ slithered over his skin, wrapping his head in thick, dark sludge. He hated that word. Never hearing it again would be too soon. Zyke wasn’t what he needed. Any alpha except him would do.

Unless. There were only a few ways to get out of a mating contract, and infidelity was one of them. He would probably end up in prison, but maybe they would go easy on him. Teddy was right about him nearly going feral. He could feel something clawing at his vision and threatening to take hold.

“Wendelin,” said Vale, forcing himself to his full height. He was still shorter than every person except Teddy in the room, but they were all looking at him with full attention. This was his house. “Come with me.”

Teddy looked between them, shock and hurt in his gaze. He had a hand on his belly protectively, but he turned toward Vale, squaring his shoulders. “You need your mate, Vale, not mine.”

Oh. Well, that put Wendelin out of the running. Teddy was sweet, and he’d rather not drag him into this shit show.

“Sander!” Vale belted the name out, shouting over the music that seemed to have gotten quieter. Maybe someone had turned it down or maybe it was the blood rushing through Vale’s ears. He wobbled, reaching for the closest person and steadying himself.

It was Caleb, his forehead furrowed in concern as he grasped Vale by the shoulders. Vale fell against him, his legs nearly collapsing at the scent of a familiar alpha. His heart pounded, his skin shivering as he was pulled in too many directions. Caleb was close enough to almost be considered family and someone who could platonically help him through his heat by sitting next to him or cuddling beneath a blanket.

But he shuddered at the same time, his revulsion so palpable he could taste it. When Caleb touched his bare skin, it nearly burned.

What am I doing? He jerked away, stumbling to the nearest wall. There was movement and people shouting all around him, but he could barely hear them over the sound of his own gasping breaths. When someone touched him, he jerked away, their hands only making his skin burn brighter, his muscles pulling taut until he feared he would never be able to move again.

Time ticked by slowly as he trembled, barely hanging on to himself. His eyes slid shut, and he leaned his forehead into the wall, wishing he could delete the last hour from his memory. I’m such a fool.

His plan was doomed from the start. He couldn’t do it. Even if there was a minuscule chance it would hurt his best friend, he couldn’t make himself do it. No risk would ever outweigh the benefit.

Cool hands touched him, and he knew who it was before he even opened his eyes. He recognized that scent of cocoa and sweetness on such a visceral level that he’d never be able to forget.

“I don’t want you,” said Vale, shaking his head as he tried to get away. He had nowhere to go except into the wall, his cheek smooshed against it.

Distant whispers of apologies washed over him, but he paid them no heed. He had to get away before he destroyed their friendship forever.

“Vale.”

Vale shivered at Zyke’s voice, a part of him buckling. He was wet and ready, his body responding, even though he begged it not to.

“I don’t want you,” said Vale, his voice lost in the fog that surrounded his thoughts. “No matter what I say, I don’t want it.”

In thirty minutes he’d probably be begging for it with the way things were trending, so who knew how long he’d be rational. Even as he said it now, it didn’t exactly strike as true.

“I just want to be loved.” It slipped through his lips before he could stop it, the truth of it ringing more than anything else had. There was no way Zyke would understand it. Zyke didn’t believe in love.

“I’m not going to touch you,” said Zyke, his voice surprisingly desperate. “I just want to get you to your room so you can lie down—or maybe in the shower. Your temperature is really high.”

That was probably why his brain felt like mush. But a shower meant naked.

Vale grabbed at his shorts, holding them stubbornly. He couldn’t trust himself if he was naked. He’d already proven that.

He didn’t remember getting to the bathroom, only being there and squinting against the lights and ducking his head. Zyke was bracing his shoulder, one hand reaching out to test the stream from the shower. When Vale looked down, he saw that he was already naked.

Whimpering, he wrapped his arms around himself, shifting his legs closer together. He could feel wetness along his thighs, getting worse as more dripped from him. His lower back ached for him to stretch his ass up after dropping to his knees, presenting to his mate who was right there.

Fuck you. He couldn’t remember ever being pissed off at his body, but he was now.

“It’s cold,” he said as the water suddenly surrounded him. It wasn’t freezing like he’d expected, merely cool, but it did little to quench the heat in him that only seemed to be getting worse. Turning away, he gagged, spitting into the water below his feet. It swirled around a few times before it was inevitably sucked into the drain.

“Hell. Why didn’t they call me?” asked Zyke, grasping Vale’s arm when he nearly slipped. “They shouldn’t have run me out of the house over and over when you were like this. I had to wait for them to throw a party so I could sneak in, and this is how I find you? I’m going to fucking kill them.”

“You should go,” said Vale, flinching as the water struck his cheek. “I’ll be fine. I don’t want you here.”

“I heard you the first time,” said Zyke, snapping back. He was a touch rougher as he turned the dial on the shower down, the water cooling off even more. This time it seemed to sink in further, striking all the way to Vale’s core. “You’ve made it abundantly clear that you want nothing to do with me.”

Vale watched the water swirl down the drain, his head thudding so hard he could barely see. “I want to be best friends like we’ve always been.” He probably sounded childish, his voice ringing in the close bathroom as his chest ached. “You’re my best friend.” And I ruined it. His tears were lost to the water, swirling down the drain.

“And now we’re mates,” said Zyke.

Vale ripped away from his touch, catching himself on the wall. “I can’t be your mate. You’ll never love me.”

He wasn’t sure what possessed him to say it out loud, but it was true. He couldn’t help but hate Zyke for it. “Why can’t you love me?” He turned on Zyke, letting out a snarl that fell weak and flat. “Things would be so much easier if we’d never been friends at all. I could have found someone who actually fucking cared about how I feel.”

“Vale, don’t.” Zyke grabbed for the dial, turning the shower off with a twist as he gritted his teeth together.

Vale looked at him—really looked at him for the first time that day. His head was a touch clearer, and he spotted the thick dark lines under Zyke’s eyes and the way his eyes were red-rimmed. There was a smudge of dirt on his cheek that was dark and bruised underneath.

“What happened?” Vale asked softly, reaching for Zyke’s cheek before he could stop himself and smoothing his thumb over the skin. What he’d thought was dirt was more a bruise, speckled with tiny scabs to make up a scrape.

“I tried to climb the wall outside your window,” said Zyke, reaching for a towel and wrapping it around Vale’s waist without looking away. “You made it look so easy at my place, but there isn’t really a trellis that goes up to your window here. I made it to just below your window before a brick crumbled under my foot and I fell.”

Vale blinked, dropping his hand and looking to the towel that was wrapped around his waist. It should have been on the ground, and he should have been on his knees with his ass in the air. His head swam with the image, making him tremble. His cock poked out against the towel, as if trying to escape.

“Why were you climbing the house?” He blinked again, his hands shaking as he touched the towel. It had come from his nest, but it was still clean, even if it was a bit wrinkled.

“To get to you,” said Zyke. “I want to help you back into bed.” He let out a sigh as Vale drew back. “Let me take your hand, at least.”

“You could have just gone through the door,” said Vale, dropping his gaze to their linked hands. The touch wasn’t electric or warm, simply soothing like it had been every time before. It was probably the only thing that hadn’t changed.

“Not with your pack guarding it,” said Zyke, taking Vale’s elbow when he wobbled. “I never thought those two had it in them, but there was no way I was going to get past them without somebody ending up bleeding.” He paused at the edge of the bed. “Is it okay if I change the sheets real quick? They’re soaked, and I don’t want you getting sick.”

Vale flushed with embarrassment, turning his face away. There was a lot of evidence in that bed, and it was mostly of him fucking himself with very little reprieve. That, and way too much sweat.

“Okay.”

Zyke helped him sit before instantly striding to the bed and ripping the sheets off. Grabbing a new set from the closet, he had the bed remade in moments, bringing fresh blankets for a new nest, too. He piled them haphazardly, smoothing them with no attention to detail whatsoever with jerky rushed movements.

“If you leave it like that, it will dig into your side as you sleep and you’ll wake up with a big line,” said Vale, shuffling toward the bed, and using the edge of the mattress to drag himself upward. He touched the crease that Zyke had left, tugging the blanket just right so it disappeared. “See? That’s much better.”

The towel dropped from his hips, and he climbed inside, sighing as he settled back against the covers. Water from his hair instantly soaked in, but the sheets were soft and comfortable beyond words.

“Is it okay?”

Vale cracked his eyes open a slit at Zyke’s question. He was hovering close by, pacing along the end of the bed, despite how exhausted he looked. Worse was probably his hands as he clenched and unclenched them, his knuckles nearly as scraped as his cheek.

“You look tired,” said Vale, turning onto his side so he could watch better while resting his head. “Like you haven’t slept in days.” He slipped his fingers over one of the blankets, cuddling it close. His fever didn’t seem quite so bad now, his skin sweaty but not hot like it had been.

“I haven’t,” said Zyke, pausing at the corner of the bed before seeming to think better of it and stepping back to the bathroom to turn the light off. “I woke up alone, and I remembered everything that had happened. I’d been completely powerless to stop it, but I don’t think I’ll ever forget it. I’ve never seen you scared before—not really.”

“That was a week ago,” said Vale, his gut panging. “I should have left you a note.”

“You shouldn’t have left while I was asleep,” said Zyke, smoothing a hand over his own chin. “It fucked with my head. I thought you hated me. My parents flipped when they heard me calling for you that morning, but I wouldn’t tell them a thing.”

Vale closed his eyes, leaning into the pillows. He hadn’t really thought of how Zyke’s family would react, or his own, for that matter. They never thought about my feelings, either. He squashed the thought. He wasn’t a child.

“Would you believe me if I told you I was sorry?” asked Zyke, his head bowed.

“For what?” Even with everything that had happened, none of it was Zyke’s fault. “It was our families trying to do what was best for us. They thought we were practically bonded.” He spat it out, turning away. The back of his neck tingled into awareness as he faced away from Zyke.

“I…I asked them to.”

Vale froze, his heart in his throat as it pounded fierce enough to make his vision swim. “What?”

Zyke let out a harsh sigh as Vale rolled back to face him, staring in utter disbelief.

“My parents started asking when I was going to start bidding on contracts. I should have really done it five years ago when most of our friends started getting mated. I don’t really know what I was waiting for, but I didn’t want to be alone anymore. I never really thought your family would agree to it, or I assumed that they would have talked to you first and given you the chance to back out.”

Vale sat up, pulling his legs against his chest and suddenly feeling more naked than he ever had. Questions flitted through his mind faster than he could grasp them, snatched up by rage that was quickly turning from a simmer to a boil.

“You should leave,” said Vale, his voice cold.

There should have been a touch of relief. If it had all been Zyke’s idea, then he hadn’t forced him when his rut was at its strongest. But every cell was brimming with utter betrayal.

“No,” said Zyke, shaking his head. “I’m not leaving, and neither are you. We are going to sit here and talk this out like adults.”

“Don’t you get it?” snarled Vale. He released his legs, getting onto his knees. His fingers ached as his small, blunt claws made themselves known. “I don’t want you.”

Zyke jerked his head as if he’d been slapped, turning away so Vale could only see the line of his chin and his cheek that was thick with scruff and dark from the bruise. “I know, but I’m still not leaving.”

His rage quickly crumbled as his gut started to ache again, the reprieve swiftly over. His body was craving something so strongly that he could almost see it in his mind—his ass in the air and those brutal spines digging into him.

“Please go,” said Vale, crumpling onto the sheets and twisting so they wrapped around him. It was so foreign even though he’d been through it before, but never this strongly. “Don’t fuck me, no matter what I beg for. I don’t want it.” The helplessness engulfed him, wrapping around his neck with a tight cord.

“I won’t,” said Zyke. His eyes were wet and streaked with red, contrasting terribly with the darkness there. “Please trust me. I’d never hurt you like that.”

But you already did.

Vale sobbed as Zyke crawled into the nest, tugging him close in a hug that was all comfort and soothing coolness. Chocolate coated his senses along with something else sharper and thicker. He knew without looking that Zyke was hard.

“Please. Please.” Vale didn’t know what he was begging for, but once he started, he couldn’t stop. Words poured out of his mouth and against Zyke’s neck as he nuzzled closer, seeking as much contact as he could. When he tried to dip his fingers under Zyke’s shirt, seeking the only soothing thing in the room, Zyke clamped his hand over his wrist, forcing him to stop.

“Go to sleep,” said Zyke, his voice trembling. “Please, Vale. I’ll watch over you. Nothing will happen while I’m here.”

The baser part of Vale responded to the words, even as he longed to rub and explore the man before him, arousal soaking into his being. He was wet and ready, and so relaxed it probably wouldn’t hurt near as much as it had the first time. But Zyke didn’t touch him like that, only releasing his wrist when Vale stopped trying to touch.

“Sleep.”

He couldn’t resist.