Mr Burton was in his front garden with a leaf-blower when we got home. This struck me as odd because there weren’t any leaves on the ground. His eyes followed us all the way to the front door.
The moment we got inside, I dumped my bag and headed for the stairs. I’d arranged to meet up online with Ali later, to play Revenge of the Robots. We’d been trying to get through the last level of the game for over a week, but the boss robot was too powerful and we kept getting killed. I wanted to get some practice in.
“One moment, Master Just Jake,” said Robin. “My instructions state that all homework must be completed before recreational activities are allowed.”
“That’s OK, I don’t have any homework tonight,” I lied.
But the robot was already stroking his beard. “Accessing homework online,” he said in his computer voice. “Class Z: Design a poster for the school fair. Due in tomorrow.” Robin came out of his trance and his beard twitched into a smile. “I’ll get the felt tips out, shall I?”
I stomped back down the stairs. Maybe a babysitter with instant online access wasn’t so cool after all.
Robin made me and Jess sit at the table – TOGETHER – to do our homework. It took us hours to make posters that he was happy with. Every time one of us told the robot we’d finished, he’d spot some important piece of information we’d forgotten, or point out that we’d spelled something wrong. Then he made us colour them in, standing over us like a prison guard. It was dark outside by the time he let me go upstairs.
It felt like barely five minutes later when Robin knocked on my bedroom door. “Your thirty minutes of game time are almost up, Master Just Jake!” he said, walking in.
“What? It can’t be!”
“You have exactly fifty-three seconds left,” said the robot.
“Yeah, OK! I just need to get to the end of this level.” I didn’t dare take my eyes off the screen. Me and Ali were being pinned down by a swarm of seriously scary, giant robotic insects. It was the furthest we’d got through the level.
“Ten seconds, Master Just Jake,” said Robin.
“Yeah, I just need to finish this.”
“Five seconds.”
I was low on health and ammo.
“Four.”
I had to make the last few attacks count.
“Do you have to count?”
“Two.”
“You’re really not helping!”
“One.”
The screen went black.
“WHAT? NO!” I shook the controller, staring at the dead console in disbelief.
“Your thirty minutes are up, Master Just Jake.”
I looked at the robot. “YOU SWITCHED IT OFF?”
“Your mother’s instructions were very clear,” he said. “Thirty minutes’ game time only.”
“You don’t just pull the plug IN THE MIDDLE OF A GAME! Mum would’ve let me finish the level! When she says thirty minutes, she doesn’t mean EXACTLY – to the SECOND!”
Jess appeared in the doorway to see what all the shouting was about.
“HE PULLED THE PLUG ON ME!” I still couldn’t quite believe it.
Just then the doorbell rang and Robin went downstairs to answer it.
“At least you got to play,” said Jess. “He just made me practise the recorder – for FIFTEEN WHOLE MINUTES!”
“I wondered what that noise was,” I said. “I thought it was the screams of dying robots in my game.”
Jess stuck out her tongue. “It’s NOT FUNNY!”
For once I had to agree with her. “I thought a robot babysitter would be so cool – but no! Grandma has to invent some rule-obsessed fun sponge who looks like Father Christmas gone wrong!”
I could hear Robin downstairs talking to Mr Burton. It must have been him at the door. I wondered what he wanted.
“We need to do something,” said Jess, “before this gets out of hand.”
“Have you got a plan?”
“I’m working on it.”
There was a look in my sister’s eyes as she said it that almost made me feel sorry for the robot.
But Jess didn’t come up with anything.
And things just got worse.