THE FASTING STATE OF MIND
FEELING “CONNECTED”
When I decided to write this book I promised myself that I wouldn’t shy away from something that science, or nutrition for that matter, will never be able to pin down or explain – what fasting feels like, or how connected it can make you feel – but describing this is nigh on impossible.
So, let me start with a story instead… Once upon a time an Indian guru was asked what the difference was between wellness and illness. The wise man went up to a blackboard and wrote the word “illness”. He circled the first letter, “i”, and then he wrote the word “wellness” and circled the first two letters, “we”.
Fasting helps you connect better with yourself. If your body is your vehicle, your mind is surely your driver. Fasting also helps people to connect better with each other, and anything that creates a sense of connection will surely be healing.
“KNOW THYSELF”
When trying to explain how to cultivate a fasting state of mind, the ancient Greek aphorism, “know thyself”, seems like a perfect place to start, but this can be trickier than it sounds. In our busy world, with all its digital chatter, noise, pressure and expectations, if you ask a person to name something they would really like, it’s quite likely to be some superficial, material object. However, more often than not, people (my husband included) express their heart’s desire as a negative – for example, “less pressure/stress”.
Time after time in my clinics, workshops and retreats I’ve seen that getting beneath the surface of polite, bland sound bites requires sensitive probing and perseverance. I’ve often found that this is where fasting can help. During a fast, emotions that have long been buried can come to the surface, often with more urgency and force than expected. At first, this may simply be the person rebelling against having limited food, even if the fast is self-inflicted – a bit like your toddler-self, stomping your little feet when you were told, “No, you can’t have that lolly”!
Gradually though, fasting can be like a release. I liken it to leaving a door ajar in the brain for emotions to escape. It doesn’t mean you fall to your knees, wailing about your first heartbreak or rejection. I’ve found that it’s much more subtle and much more healing than that. After all, fasting has a purpose and has been used for thousands of years to gain spiritual insight and connect with the unseen, whatever that means to you.
Back in the day, fasting usually took place in a remote place where the person could spend time alone. The mind experience of fasting, just like the body experience, has to be created, or at least permitted. It’s not always practical to do this, of course. We can’t suddenly renounce our worldly goods and become a wandering mystic just because we’ve had a tough Tuesday at work!
At the most basic level, one thing that fasting does for the mind is to make you much more conscious of what you are eating. If you haven’t eaten for 16 hours you’ll savour your first mouthful – I guarantee it!
MEDITATION
For those with ambition above and beyond the physical benefits of fasting, getting into the fasting state of mind can be helped by meditation, and if you have the time and inclination at least once in your life, a week’s retreat can take the fasting experience to another level.
Meditation can be viewed in scientific terms for its effects on the mind and the body. During meditation, a marked increase in blood flow slows heart rate, and high blood pressure drops to within normal ranges. Recent research indicates that meditation can also boost the immune system and reduce free radicals – in effect, a slowing down of the ageing process.
There’s much talk about the power of meditation and how you can use your mind to manifest great piles of money. But, becoming more aware of your mind is not just about manipulating it or attempting only to have positive thoughts – rather, it’s about the ability to direct your attention toward or away from the mind at will.
My most intensive fast was on a 10-day silent meditation retreat during my time in India. One evening, five days into the experience when I was seriously doubting my judgement about freezing my butt off in a cold cave in the Himalayas, I had what I’ve come to realize was a “breakthough” moment. In spiritual terms I’d describe it as a moment of grace. With a raw, pure energy of infinite magnitude, my mind flashed through formative experiences – good and bad – that had shaped my life. As my mind was swept along on this emotional rollercoaster, my body conveniently left the room, leaving me nowhere to run or hide… or at least that was how it felt!
Even more strangely (and I realize I may lose a few of you here!), during this experience it felt like my spine had dissolved to be replaced by a light-filled serpent. I was left astounded, uplifted and more than a little confused. Given that I was in the middle of a silent retreat, I couldn’t even talk to anyone about what I had experienced.
It felt like all the vertebrae in my spine had dissolved at once, to be replaced with an energy much like an electric current. Even more bizarre was the fact that this energy surge was joined by an unshakable vision of a cobra-like snake replacing my spinal column.
Seeking answers, the day I left the meditation retreat I went straight to an Internet café. Within a few minutes I’d discovered that Hindu mythology describes the “serpent power” that lies coiled at the base of the spine as a kind of universal energy. Reportedly, this energy is awakened in deep meditation or enlightenment.
However, let me offer a word of caution before your expectations are set on a one-way ticket to nirvana. If, like many of us, you’re the kind of person who never switches off, who even on holiday has the day scheduled from dawn till dusk, the mind experience that can accompany fasting may pass you by altogether. If you want to know yourself better, fasting in a gentle, supportive and quiet environment can help you accomplish a gentle re-boot both physically and mentally, and possibly a little spiritually too. Fasting needs some willpower in the beginning and patience as you move forward. Creating the right environment to enter the fasting state of mind, both inside and outside the body, is really helpful.
When I first started to meditate, I tried too hard. Furiously studying the science of the mind or contorting your face into Zen-like expressions won’t work. The only way to experience meditation is actually to experience it. It can be maddening. You’ll be trying to meditate for hours and then, just when you’re ready to give up, you might get a flash of something akin to what you were aiming for. Yet, in that momentary shift you might see how you could choose to do a few things differently, or how some really small things have a huge impact on you, and how easy it would be to make a few minor changes. Many great thinkers have talked about breakthroughs and inspiration. The most famous of all was probably Albert Einstein, who said that no problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.
So, if you do manage to get your mind to stop its usual chatter through meditation, try asking yourself a question when all is calm. For example, if you always react to something uncomfortable by quashing the emotion with food, then meditation can create a gap to ask why. Sometimes there’s a clear answer to that question, and sometimes there isn’t. Usually it takes a bit of time.
YOGA
Yoga is often lumped together with meditation since the kind of person who likes yoga is often into meditation, and vice versa. For people with a poor attention span, yoga can be a good way of getting into a calm state without the need ever to sit cross-legged.
There are many forms of yoga and it’s a case of having a go and seeing which suits you best. Regardless of which tradition you choose, good yoga teachers can make you walk out of the class feeling a foot taller and ready to take on the world. My advice would be:
•If you’re gentle by nature, try Hatha.
•If you’re into precision and detail, go for Iyengar.
•If you like the spiritual side of yoga, opt for Sivananda.
•If you want yoga to help you sleep, try Yin.
•If you’re fit and physical, Ashtanga or Vinyasa “flow” yoga will be more your bag.
•If you really want to sweat, try Bikram, or “hot yoga”. It’s not for the faint hearted and has some medical contra-indications, but it’s considered seriously addictive by devotees.
SELF-CONTROL
If you’re into popular psychology or consider yourself a “Tiger Mum” (or Dad), you might well have come across the famous longitudinal “Stanford University Marshmallow Study”, first started in the 1960s by Stanford psychology researcher Michael Mischel. The purpose of the original experiment was to find out at what age children develop the ability to wait for something they really want, and subsequent studies over many years tracked the effects of deferred gratification on a person’s future success. Mischel’s experiment went like this:
A marshmallow was offered to a number of hungry four-year-old children. If a child could resist eating the marshmallow, he or she was promised two instead of one. The scientists analyzed how long each child resisted the temptation of eating the marshmallow. It was discovered that the children who were better at resisting the allure of eating a marshmallow were the ones who distracted themselves, for example by singing songs, playing with their shoelaces or pretending the marshmallow was a cloud. Interestingly, those children that Mischel called “high-delayers” went on to achieve, among other things, higher SAT (standard assessment test) scores and had lower body-mass indexes as adults than those who were easier to tempt with the marshmallows.
As my husband keeps reminding me about the male sex, “Men are just kids with longer legs”. In other words, if you think that you’ve outgrown your four-year-old self, you’re probably wrong. A follow-up to Mischel’s study group in 2011 showed that the high-delayers’ characteristic remains for life (it’s partly tied in with how our brains are configured). This is not good news for those of us who like an immediate fix and think “saving up for a rainy day” is for losers… and boring ones at that.
If you watch American TV, you most likely know that if you can get into the aforementioned Stanford University, you’re one smart cookie. However, as a study led by Baba Shiv, Associate Professor of Marketing at Stanford’s Graduate School of Business proved, being smart doesn’t mean you have better willpower. In Shiv’s experiment, several dozen undergraduates were divided into two groups. One group was given a two-digit number to remember, while the second group was given a seven-digit number. Then they were told to walk down the hall where they were presented with two different snack options – a slice of chocolate cake or a bowl of fruit salad. The students with seven digits to remember were nearly twice as likely to choose the cake as students given two digits. The researchers behind the study surmised that the results were because those extra numbers took up valuable space in the brain – they were a “cognitive load” – making it that much harder to resist a sweet fix.
Let’s translate this into real life.
Jenny breaks up with her boyfriend. Does she:
a) Go home and make herself a nutritionally balanced meal, served with mineral water, ice and a twist of lime?
b) Ditch the diet in favour of “wine o’clock” with the girls?
Adam feels belittled by his boss. Does he:
a) Go to the gym and order carrot juice?
b) Hit the pub with his mates?
The point is, we’ve all been there and we’re fundamentally likely to let good intentions fall by the wayside if we’re stressed or overwhelmed, no matter how smart we are. In these types of situations it will be your friends or family that will keep you on track.
KNOW THE EFFECT OTHERS HAVE ON YOU
I guarantee that if you enter the world of fasting you’ll meet Mrs Doyle. Mrs Doyle? For those of you who are not familiar with the Mrs Doyle archetype, she was the housekeeper in the classic Irish sitcom “Father Ted” whose famous catchphrase was, “Ahhh now, go on, go on, go on, go on” as she indulged the other characters with yet another tray bake (it would be rude not to accept). She’s the kind of person (most typically female) who never takes no for an answer.
Frankly, when you begin fasting, your steely reserve and shrinking waistline are intimidating. Your new-found energy is probably annoying. There will be people who want to join in the fun and come along for the ride with you, but others, like Mrs Doyle, who cannot wait to topple you. They probably do it unconsciously, so don’t give the feeders a hard time. Just be armed with your excuse (“doctor’s orders” or “sorry, I’m allergic to Victoria sponge”) and move on.
Then there are the energy vampires. Granted, it all sounds a tad melodramatic but I bet you can identify a time in your life when being around a certain person made you feel drained. If so, try to haul in your social network and remember that when you’re fasting you’re better off being selfish with your energy reserves. This is a good kind of selfish.
This isn’t just about making a success of fasting though. Who you hang out with has a very real impact on whether you gain weight or get slim. A study published in the New England Journal of Medicine showed how powerful your friends are. Looking at a community of 12,067 people over a period of 32 years, researchers found that subjects were more likely to gain weight and become obese when their friends did. Where there was an especially close friendship between two people, the odds of influencing each other’s bodies was even greater. If one friend became obese, the odds of the other friend doing the same nearly tripled. Luckily, if you hang out with slender people the effect is the same.
Mostly though, sabotage is of the self-inflicted kind. You know as well as I do how easily healthy intentions can be swept aside. The morning visit to the coffee shop for a caffeine fix ends up including a muffin, the one glass of wine becomes a bottle (oops, hic), and snuggling up on the sofa replaces the trip to the gym. You get the idea… so, keeping your own willpower on track is your main task.
CHOOSE YOUR ENVIRONMENT WISELY
Now back to my fasting in India story…
Up there in the Himalayas, the first meal of the day, a simple lentil dhal and vegetable curry, was served at noon. Escaping to eat something indulgent would involve an hour-long trek to a German bakery further up river or taking a rickshaw to the nearby town. If you were foolish enough to leave any of your treats lying around, the monkeys would steal them anyway. In other words, it was really hard to over-indulge.
Contrast this with normal life for most of us. Food and the opportunity to eat are everywhere around us. Combine this with limited opportunities to be active day-to-day and you have what scientists call an “obesogenic” environment. The term was first coined by researchers Boyd Swinburn and Garry Egger, of Deakin University, Australia, who describe it as:
“The sum of influences that the surroundings, opportunities, or conditions of life have on promoting obesity in individuals or populations.”
When you’re fasting, especially for the first time, it makes sense to think about where you will be spending your time. For example, don’t plan your weekly shop to coincide with the first morning you skip breakfast. If you’re at work, empty your snack-box and stock up on herbal teas. For every life situation there will be a way to support it. Make it a rule to think this through before you begin.
There’s another way that your state of mind can easily be sidetracked from calm and controlled to flustered and aggravated. A classic way we all fall off the wagon… yes, when you’ve had a bad night’s sleep.
Well, maybe not exactly – sleeping like a baby would mean waking up every few hours – but you get my drift. Quality sleep as opposed to an alcohol-induced comatose state is incredibly helpful.
Not enough sleep makes you feel hungrier and fasting therefore becomes harder. Scientists have long been aware of the fact that many hormones are affected by sleep disruption, but it’s only in the last few years that the hormones controlling appetite and weight have been scrutinized and linked together in this way.
Let me put it another way… Even if you’re strong willed, you still can’t escape the fact that you really are a body-shaped bag of hormones. Ghrelin and leptin are a true partnership in the hormone world. (As we saw on page 42, ghrelin is a substance produced by the intestinal tract that induces hunger or an appetite. Its counterpart leptin is responsible for telling your brain that you’re full or satisfied, therefore meaning you stop eating, unless you’re eating emotionally.)
These two counterparts should obviously be working in balance to make sure you’re eating when you’re hungry and stopping when you’re full. Now, here’s the rub… Levels of ghrelin are found to be higher in people who have either short or disrupted sleep patterns, compared to those who have 7–8 hours of good-quality sleep.
At a fundamental level, being awake at odd or irregular hours will fight with your body’s natural biological rhythms, and many body functions, including digestion, hormones and metabolism, can be put out of kilter. Shift workers or the jet-set for whom changing time-zones is a regular occurrence face more of a challenge than those of us who just like to watch late-night TV every now and then. There’s a reason why vending machines are all over airports and hospitals – quick-fix sugars are just so much more enticing when you’re exhausted. In other words, when sleep deprivation hits, you’re less in control. Being tired can sabotage a diet or your healthy intentions and is one of the main reasons why baby weight’s so hard to shift. So, if you‘re lucky enough to have a choice about when to go to sleep, don’t be ashamed about turning in early.
Last of all, it’s not just a question of the amount of sleep you’re getting, it’s also about the quality. So what adversely affects this? Well, I’m afraid it’s the usual culprits – too much caffeine, stress and late-night eating.
TO SLEEP, PERCHANCE TO DREAM
Don’t be alarmed if your dreams become more vivid when you change your diet and begin fasting. This, too, is part of the fasting state of mind. Remember, fasting used to be used only for spiritual purposes – a kind of mind detoxification, if you will. Let your unconscious run riot. You could even try keeping a dream journal or diary if you believe that dreams can be instructive. At the very least it can be entertaining!
WHEN YOU WAKE UP
A rude awakening from a mobile phone isn’t exactly in keeping with the Zen lifestyle. Keep morning routines as simple and painless as possible so that those pesky stress hormones don’t kick in and encourage you to break your fast four hours early. Granted, not many of us are able to wake with the rising sun and the tweeting of songbirds, but at the very least, set your alarm to a soothing sound rather than something jarring.
SLEEP SOOTHERS
If your body is tired, it’s easier to get to sleep. So, if you’ve reached the bedtime hour and still have bundles of energy, think about expending it in … er … fun ways. But if you prefer something less adult, a warm bath is a childhood classic that works just as well for big kids as little kids.
GET MENTALLY PREPARED
If you’re limbering up for a fast and your mind could do with a bit of a warm-up too, here are some preparation steps to help you get into the right state of mind, courtesy of meditation teacher, Sandy Newbigging.
PREP STEP 1: BE WILLING TO CHANGE
Most people’s comfort zones are actually pretty uncomfortable. Self-limiting beliefs, health problems and challenging life circumstances can become all too familiar, and with familiar there can be a sense of security. Be completely honest with yourself when considering these questions:
•Are you willing to draw a line in the sand and step out into unfamiliar territory?
•Are you willing to do things differently?
•Are you willing to trust the process, even if at the start, some parts may seem pointless?
•Are you willing to do whatever it takes to build momentum toward new healthier habits?
If yes, then great!
PREP STEP 2: BE CLEAR ABOUT THE RESULTS YOU WANT
You are both the architect and builder of your physical body. Every day, you spend 24 hours taking actions that determine your shape, weight and overall health. The great news is that it’s up to you how you use your time and there are no limits to the incredible body you can build.
Knowing why you want to adopt your new fasting approach can help you remain motivated and stay the distance as you get the results you want. When deciding what your goals are, it’s highly recommended that you state them in a positive way. For instance, instead of “no longer being fat” it’s more compelling and motivational to focus on “being slim, full of energy and clear headed”. Take a moment to consider what you want and why you want it, and write it down in a journal so you can refer to it in the future at times when you need a little reminder.
PREP STEP 3: BE EASY ON YOURSELF
The transition from your old ways to new healthier habits is much more likely to happen if you’re easy on yourself. It’s natural for human beings to move away from pain toward pleasure. If you associate your new eating habits with pain, discomfort or strict discipline, you’re going to increase the likelihood of quitting before your new habits become second nature to you.
On the other hand, linking your new habits with pleasure is more pleasing to the mind and enhances your chances of success. Set the intention to be gentle on yourself as you cultivate the changes you want. There’ll be times when you may fall off the wellness wagon. If this happens, refrain from beating yourself up. Instead, lift yourself up with encouraging thoughts. Praise yourself for wanting to improve your health and, in as gentle a way as possible, decide to dust yourself off, put the past behind you and move on with a positive mind and peaceful heart.
PREP STEP 4: SHAPE UP YOUR SELF-IMAGE
You are what you think you are and you will become what you think you will become. Your “self-image” is your opinion of yourself. Your self-image determines your life success because it a) impacts how you feel and b) shapes your life choices, which in turn accumulate to form your life circumstances. Even if you don’t immediately believe it to be true, if you start to think intentionally about yourself as a more positive, confident and healthy person, you’ll begin to make decisions that will create a person and life that reflects your self-image.
Ultimately, it can be your choice to shape your self-image in a way that will help you to feel worthy of health success. Let now be the time you choose to take control of the opinions you have about yourself.