Sophia parked in front of Davey’s job site and cut the engine. He didn’t get off work for another ten minutes, but she’d been able to sneak out of work early and hadn’t known what to do with herself.
She pulled out her phone and tapped it on the steering wheel before giving in to her desire and texting Reggie to say hi and let her know she was thinking about her.
Reggie wrote back quickly. At work. Miss your smile.
It felt like warm candlelight spread from Sophia’s toes to her nose as she reread Reggie’s words. For the first time, she allowed there could be real feelings building. It scared and thrilled her in equal measure.
Another text came through. This week is nuts. Haven’t forgotten about next date. Soon. Promise.
Sophia thought about writing back that she couldn’t, she’d changed her mind, and nearly choked on her own regret. She wasn’t backing out now, even if it was the wiser, more pragmatic choice.
I won’t let you forget. I’ll see you at the design team if I don’t get you sooner. Sophia’s hands trembled as she typed.
Davey pulled open the passenger door and dropped into the seat startling Sophia so much she nearly dropped her phone.
“Setting up a hot date?” Davey pointed to her phone suspiciously.
Sophia pulled her phone closer to her chest. “So what if I am.”
Davey’s eyes got wide. “You are. With who? That mall cop?”
Sophia punched him in the arm, hard. “She’s a corrections officer.” She narrowed her eyes when Davey started to laugh. “You knew that. You were baiting me.”
“Of course I was. You know you give away a lot by how hard you smack me when you’re frustrated? You’ve done it since you were little. You must really be hung up on her to hit me that hard.” Davey searched her face but didn’t say anything else.
Sophia considered giving him a politically neutral answer or a jokey blow off, but given her own discovery moments ago, either of those felt dishonest. She’d never lied to her brother.
“I can’t seem to sort out my feelings for her, but when her name pops up on my phone I can’t make myself care that she’s a risk to my career. I want to see more of her, even when I just said good-bye.”
Davey reached out and took her hand. He only did that when he was about to get serious with her about something.
“A job is something you do, it’s not who you are, and it sure as hell isn’t something you can tuck yourself in next to at night.”
“I think my job is a little different than most. People care a lot about things like who politicians tuck themselves in with at night and a whole lot of other mundane information. You know all the information you always wonder about your doctor or the bus driver you see every day but don’t have any right to know? Well, everyone thinks they have a right to know all those details and more about politicians.”
“So what? I think I have a right to play my cello in the middle of the street during rush hour because I pay taxes for that road, but everyone else disagrees.” Davey shrugged.
“That’s not the same thing, but thanks. I think.”
“My point is, you don’t have to give in just because someone else has expectations for you. You know how damn proud I am of you? Maybe Mom and Pop never let up on us, but even they couldn’t find fault with what you’re doing now. I tell everyone my baby sister is Representative Lamont, but if this lady makes you happy…” Davey trailed off.
“You make it sound so easy.” Sophia pulled away from the curb and headed toward Mrs. Medeiros’s restaurant.
“Hell no. You’re the one who chose to mix love and politics, the two most volatile human conditions on earth. There are about a million ways this blows up in your face.” Davey mocked an explosion with his hands.
“You’re one to talk.”
“I’m choosing a different route, no mixing. After politics and love, friendship and love is probably next in line for combustion potential. I prefer an explosion-free existence.” Davey looked down at his hands in his lap, his eyes sad.
“You know, one of these days I’m going to tell her. Neither one of you is getting any younger. I want to be an auntie and if you aren’t going to locate your balls and tell her how you feel, I’ll have to take them out for a spin myself.”
Davey looked horrified. “You wouldn’t.”
“Why not? She’s my best friend, and we don’t keep secrets from each other.”
“You’ve kept this one. I’m begging you.” He looked at her with desperation in his eyes.
“For God’s sake, Davey, just talk to her.” Sophia blew out an exasperated breath.
“Tell me about the work you’re doing on the design team. You haven’t given me an update in a while.”
Apparently, Davey calculated a subject change was in his best interest. Sophia let him off the hook. She was excited to talk to him about the progress she’d made with Reggie and get his opinion. He’d been her sounding board for years. He’d always allowed her the vulnerability and uncertainty her parents frowned upon.
“Reggie and I are working on policies to improve treatment access. I’m surprised how well we’ve been working together since I think her inclination is for more radical change. I guess increased access is something that spans ideology.”
“Was she one of the ones who hammered you on the supervised injection site?”
Sophia smiled back at her argument with Reggie. “We’ve butted heads more than once, most recently on carte blanche legalization of marijuana. She didn’t wave away the concerns about increased traffic fatalities or the impact on adolescent brain development, but she wasn’t willing to back down quickly either. She’s a worthy sparring partner.”
Davey raised an eyebrow. “That sounds promising.”
“Remove your mind from the gutter.”
“Remove yours. All I was saying is you need someone who’s your intellectual equal and likes arguing as much as you do. What were you thinking?”
Davey looked too amused for Sophia’s liking. Her face heated.
“We talked to your boss, Kit, about her experience, both personal and from working at Star Recovery. She had some ideas we’ll look into. Reggie knows of some glaring need in the prison system. I’m excited about the final proposal we’ll put together.”
They parked and got out of the car. Davey held the door for her. Mrs. Medeiros, as if she’d been tracking their progress, was waiting for them. She pulled them both into a crushing hug.
“You’re table’s waiting. Lily’s here too.” She pushed them away, looked each of them over carefully, then pulled them back for another hug. “I like having my babies all together for dinner.”
It was a familiar routine whenever they came for dinner. Since their parents passed, Sophia and Davey had been enveloped into the Medeiros family that had always been a second family to them anyway.
They followed Mrs. Medeiros across the restaurant to their table. Sophia elbowed Davey. “Lily’s here. Now’s your big chance.”
Davey glared at her and put his finger across his lips.
As they approached the table she mouthed “grow a pair.” He ignored her and turned his full attention to Lily. Sophia often wondered if Lily was as clueless as Davey assumed.
“Where’s Reggie?” Lily looked toward the door.
“Why would she be here?” Sophia looked up quickly. She knew she sounded defensive.
“Be careful, she’s wound a little tight on that subject today.” Davey stage-whispered behind his hand.
“Is something wrong? I thought you and Reggie were getting along? Didn’t your date go well?” Lily put her drink down and gave Sophia her full attention.
“Getting along a little too well.” Davey reached for Lily’s drink to steal a sip.
Lily slapped Davey’s hand away without turning her focus from Sophia. “Hush, Davey. You don’t seem to know the first thing about women or relationships or what a woman wants, so put yourself to good use and get us a round at the bar.”
Sophia laughed as Davey walked away looking bewildered. She’d always loved how Lily could throw him off balance with barely a glance.
“I don’t know how you do that to him. He’s going to walk into a wall if he doesn’t clear out the cobwebs.”
Lily looked Sophia dead in the eye. “You know exactly how I do that to him. He’s a damn fool if he doesn’t recognize it too. Even stupider if he doesn’t know what he does to me in return. How long does he expect me to wait around for him? That man’s going to have to step up and show me I’m worth him taking a damn chance.”
Sophia sat back and looked at her brother at the bar, joking with the bartender. “You know, it’s the twenty-first century, you could make the first move yourself.”
Lily looked over her shoulder at Davey and smiled shyly. “Why are we talking about me? Tell me about your Reggie. What’s troubling you?”
“Nothing. Absolutely nothing. That’s what’s concerning me.” Sophia put her elbows on the table and buried her face in her hands. “I’m so swept up in the giddy emotions, I’m not thinking rationally. But the not at all subtle threats to stay away from Reggie are still out there. I have my dream job and I’m not worried that I could blow it all up, or at least not worried enough to stay away from her.”
“You haven’t stayed away from her for months now, and you haven’t been impeached or recalled or censured for improper association. Have you gotten any angry constituent letters?”
“Not about Reggie, but I’m more worried about my fellow politicians at the moment.”
“I mean this with as much love and respect as possible, but politicians, you know, you guys talk a lot, and sometimes there is a lack of follow-through. Could all that insinuation have been bluster?” Lily reached out and took her hand. “Is it worth risking something that makes you happy on the chance people were blowing smoke?”
“Even if those two guys are all talk, which I doubt they are given their position in my party, what they’re threatening isn’t hypothetical. Politics is full of sharks and you don’t want to be the one to drip blood in the water. Reggie could be a vulnerability for me. I don’t have to like it for it to be true.”
Lily nodded as Sophia talked then squeezed between her eyes. “I seem to have a death wish tonight and am going to really push my luck. How much of this is you still being scared of not living up to your parents’ expectations if someone raises a fuss? It’s okay for you to have something for yourself, even if everyone else disapproves.”
Davey returned with their drinks. Sophia accepted hers and absently wiped the condensation from the cool surface.
“I don’t want to go from rising star to one-hit wonder because I took a stupid chance, you know? I can do good work for the people of this state, but not if I’m blacklisted.”
“Sis, you’ve always put too much pressure on yourself to be perfect. You’re going to fail, spectacularly sometimes. I know as a Black woman, you have to work twice as hard and be twenty times as good to be given half the credit, but despite what our parents drilled into us, perfection’s not possible, and you’re still going to fail at some point.”
Davey looked bone deep sad, which always broke Sophia’s heart.
“Don’t let the guideposts of failure be written for you. Why can’t Reggie be your soft landing after a hard day instead of the source of it? You write laws, for God’s sake. You should be able to write the rules of your own life and career.” Davey picked up his beer and sat back like the matter was settled.
“You’re pretty good at pep talks.” Sophia blinked rapidly a few times to clear the overabundance of moisture. “I won the brother lottery. But for the record, you’d be a terrible politician.”
“Thank you.” He saluted with his beer.
“Do you believe any of the things people say about her?” Lily looked thoughtful.
“No.” Sophia answered quickly. “I’ve seen how deeply she despises politics and how much the stain of her father’s name hurts. She doesn’t want his life or anything to do with what he left behind.”
“That seems like it’s all that matters. As long as she makes you happy. If you’re sure of each other and good to each other, fuck the rest.”
Lily rarely swore. It always stood out when she did.
“You make it sound so easy. I’m also noticing you seem to already be planning my happily ever after. Perhaps you can pump the brakes on that. We’ve been on one date. But maybe you’re right. She does make me happy and I don’t want to give that up. I put all my political skill to work to solve other people’s problems, maybe they can work this problem too.”
Sophia was distracted during dinner with thoughts of her job, Reggie, and the intersectionality of the two. New relationships were exciting and daunting. Her job came with reward and great risk of failure, and the political cost of affiliating with Reggie was still unknown. For the first time since childhood, she felt the hint of something new challenging for the top spot on the list of priorities in her life, and that was perhaps the scariest realization of all. If she let Reggie all the way in and it all blew up in her face, what would she be left with then?