Chapter Eight

DISAPPOINTMENT DOWN UNDER

Having been crowned champions of Europe, the next challenge for us was to win in the southern hemisphere. We had the opportunity when we headed Down Under to take on Australia in a three Test series last summer. We went out there full of confidence. Even though it had been a long season, we were looking forward to getting back together as a squad. We always knew it was going to be tough down there and not many teams go to the southern hemisphere and get results. But we were definitely up for it and really excited about getting stuck into them.

Playing the Aussies on their own turf would see us move right out of our comfort zone. We were used to playing them at the Millennium Stadium where everyone was always behind us. But playing down there was just what we needed in terms of taking up the next challenge and pushing us on.

It would be huge for us if we could get a scalp. And playing the best in the world was the only way we were going to find out how good we were.

It had obviously been a long season, what with the build-up to the World Cup. But none of the players would ever turn down the opportunity to wear the red jersey. Every time you play, you know it could be your last time and that makes you want to give everything.

The opening Test was in Brisbane and I found that game really hard, especially the first half.

I hadn't played for six weeks and for some of the boys it was longer. In that first half we were all really blowing – it was so difficult getting up to speed again. That was one of the first times we almost felt we'd been outplayed. I didn't like that. But the Wallabies were already into their Super 15 rugby season, so they'd hit the ground running.

The Aussie skipper David Pocock is always going to win turnovers, but in that first game he was making loads of them. I remember going in for halftime and Shaun Edwards telling us that we'd all been there before. He said that we'd got the shock out of our system now. So we came out for the second half and seemed to get into the game more. Even when we were behind we had the same positive feeling as in the Six Nations, thinking we were going to win, but it wasn't to be this time.

However, we had a chance to make amends a week later in Melbourne. You always go out to prove yourself, but in that second Test we had even more to prove.

We got off to a really good start. George North scored a try pretty much straight away and we were off and running. It was a close game all the way through, but with just a couple of minutes to go we were still in front.

What happened next was hard to take. They were awarded a penalty, kicked to touch, set up the lineout drive and we were penalised for bringing it down. Then we just had to wait as their replacement Mike Harris lined up the penalty to win the game. It was out of our hands. They had missed one just before, so there was hope. But, fair play to him, he slotted it. We saw the kick sail over and our hearts sank. In the Six Nations at the end of the Ireland game, Leigh Halfpenny had slotted a penalty to win the game for us and now it was our turn to be on the receiving end.

It was hard to swallow, thinking we had almost done it, only to lose the match right at the death. There were eighty minutes up on the clock, and the hooter had sounded. We had put so much into the game. Blood sweat and tears had gone into it. We were shattered, devastated. It was tough in the changing room afterwards.

Rob Howley, who was standing in as caretaker coach for the injured Warren Gatland, said he couldn't have asked for anything more from us in terms of effort. And, yes, we had given it our all. We'd battled hard and it was a definite improvement on the previous week. But we had lost the series and we were gutted. We are a close bunch and it really did hurt. We are as big Welsh supporters as anyone back home and to come so close and still not get it was hard to take.

It is an honest environment within the camp and we had meetings after the game and reviewed the tape of the game, as we always do. The video is up on the screen and you are asked what you were thinking at the time and what would you do again in the same situation. It's hard to watch when it's you on screen, if you've missed a tackle for them to score, or given away a crucial penalty. You don't want to be the one up there.

But everyone makes mistakes. No one has a perfect game. A lot of it is down to the opposition you are playing against. They are trying to spoil your attack and you are trying to do exactly the same to them. It's the way it is. The main thing is that you learn from it.

After that Melbourne game the coaches gave us three days off to clear our heads, and then we went into the last Test in Sydney. We still had something to prove. Although we'd lost the series, we still wanted to get a scalp out there. To salvage something from the trip.

We had chances again, but made just too many errors. Credit to the Aussies, they took their chances well and kicked their points. It was our last opportunity and it wasn't good enough.

I was again absolutely gutted. We'd been getting closer and closer. We'd lost by eight points, then two, then one. But we still lost. When you play these big teams, you've got to perform the best you can and take your chances. We'd had chances to win all three games, but hadn't taken them and that was hugely disappointing.

Australia are a quality side and to come so close to beating them showed we had been making progress and weren't a million miles off it. But we want to be winning games out there.

In international rugby, it's those three points that make the difference. One penalty less in each of the games, and it might have been a different story.

I was so disappointed we couldn't get a result out there, but it was still a good experience because I'd never played in Australia before. To go up against their back row, which was really formidable, was a fantastic challenge. I learned a lot and I found myself coming back home with a lot more confidence, despite the results.

I was also relieved I didn't have to have an ankle operation when I got home. I'd been troubled by it for a while, but I went away to Australia and the injury somehow healed itself. One day I woke up and I didn't have any pain in it any more, which was brilliant.

I came back home, saw the surgeon and he said if it didn't hurt there was no point in having an operation. So that at least was one result that went my way Down Under.

But, as fate would have it, it wasn't too long before I did find myself going in for surgery – on the other ankle. Only a few weeks into the new season I broke my left leg just above the ankle while playing for the Dragons against Edinburgh. So, once again in my career, I found myself facing a lengthy lay-off and a fight to get back to fitness.