Chapter 6

A Clean Bill of Health

Over the next few days, nearly all of Bear Country’s families were arguing about Bertha Broom and the tryouts. But fortunately, their arguments weren’t getting in the way of their deep-down love and caring for each other.

Still, most of them knew that the question of girls’ rights to play sports was very important. They knew that it couldn’t be ignored. Groups formed to pressure the school and the Bear Country government to decide whether or not Bertha Broom should be allowed to try out for football.

One evening after dinner, the Bear family was relaxing in the living room watching the news on TV when the doorbell rang. Papa got up to answer it. There stood Queenie McBear and her mother. Each held a clipboard and a pen.

“Good evening, Papa,” said Mrs. McBear pleasantly. “Haven’t seen you in a while. How have you been?”

“Oh, just fine,” said Papa. He pointed to the TV set, which was chattering away about you-know-what. “Like everyone else around here, we’re all wrapped up in this Bertha Broom business. Would you like to come in and watch with us?”

“Thank you, Papa, but we can’t stay,” said Mrs. McBear. “It’s the Bertha Broom business that brings us here. You see, I have a petition here. It asks the Bear Country Council to pass a law allowing girls to play on the sports teams at Bear Country School.”

Papa’s eyes narrowed. “As I see it,” he said, “girls are already allowed to play on the Bear Country School teams. For example, they play on the girls’ hockey and girls’ volleyball teams.”

Brother whispered to Sister, “Here we go again.”

Mama came forward. “You know what she means, Papa. I’d be glad to sign, Mrs. McBear. And if there’s anything else I can do to help …”

Sister came to the door. “Have you got a petition, too?” she asked Queenie.

“You bet,” said Queenie. “For a cheerleader strike!”

“All right!” cried Sister, high-fiving with Queenie.

“Cheerleader strike?” said Papa. “You can’t be serious! Next, I suppose one of you girls will want to run for student body president against Brother just because he’s a boy.”

Queenie looked slyly up at Papa. “I thought you already knew about that,” she said.

“You mean, you are running?” gasped Papa.

“And I’m going to beat the pants off him, too!” said Queenie.

“That does it!” yelled Papa. He was barely able to catch his breath. “I think you two had better go bother someone else with your petitions!”

Brother rushed to the door to try to smooth things over. He was grateful to Papa for sticking up for him, but he didn’t like the way Papa was going about it. “Bear Country is a democracy. So Queenie has every right to run. You remember democracy, Papa. After all, it was you and Mama who taught me about it.”

Papa calmed down. “Well … I … er … You’re right, Brother. Guess I got a little carried away there. Didn’t mean to be rude. I’m just so upset about this Bertha Broom business.…”

“That’s quite all right, Papa,” said Mrs. McBear. “I suppose we’ve all been a bit touchy lately.”

“You can say that again,” said Papa. “Why, the very idea of girls playing on the Bear Country football team …”

“In the first place,” said Queenie, “it’s not ‘girls.’ It’s one girl. And in the second place, all she wants is a chance to try out for the team.”

“And in the third place,” shouted Papa, “the whole idea is crazy!” He raged on. “Girls playing football! Whoever heard of such nonsense? Why, girls aren’t tough enough. They’re just not medically fit to play football!”

Mrs. McBear pointed past Papa to the TV screen. “Speaking of ‘medically fit,’” she said, “isn’t that Dr. Gert Grizzly?”

“What’s she doing on TV?” asked Mama.

Everyone crowded around the TV set. Bear Country’s roving reporter, Wally Bearloo, was speaking.

“As we said earlier, Mayor Honeypot has asked Bear Country’s medical expert, Dr. Gert Grizzly, to examine Bertha Broom to see if she is medically fit to play football. Dr. Grizzly finished her examination a few hours ago.

“And what are your findings, Doctor? Is Bertha Broom medically fit for football?” asked Wally.

Dr. Grizzly looked straight into the camera and smiled. “After a thorough examination of Bertha Broom,” she said, “I find that she is medically fit not only for football but also for wrestling and rugby. And she’s probably fit for running through brick walls as well.”

“Yahoo!” cried Queenie and Sister. This time even Mama and Mrs. McBear joined the girls in their high-fives.

“Humph!” snorted Papa. He stomped up the stairs to the bedroom. “What does Gert Grizzly know about football! She wouldn’t know a quarterback sack from a potato sack!”

Queenie and her mother rushed off. They wanted to continue their door-to-door campaign while Dr. Grizzly’s announcement was still hot.

When the TV news was over, Sister went upstairs to do her homework. That left Mama and Brother in front of the TV. But neither of them was watching. They had other things on their minds. Especially Brother.

“Don’t you have homework, too?” Mama asked.

Brother shrugged. “Yeah,” he said. But he made no move toward the stairs.

Mama could tell that something was bothering Brother. And she had a pretty good idea what it was. “How about helping me with the dishes first,” she said.

“Okay,” said Brother. He followed Mama into the kitchen.

Brother picked up a dish towel and stood beside Mama at the sink. “So, how has football practice been going?” Mama asked. She handed Brother the first dish to be dried.

Brother sighed. “I’m not really sure,” he answered. “All the screaming and yelling is really getting to us.”

“Screaming and yelling?” said Mama.

“From the Jeerleaders.”

“Jeerleaders? I don’t understand,” said Mama.

“Yeah,” said Brother. “A bunch of girls formed a group called the ‘Jeerleaders.’ They come out to every practice with megaphones and jeer us instead of cheer us. And now the real cheerleaders are going on strike.” Brother shook his head sadly. “We won’t have much of a season if this keeps up.”

Mama shook her head too. “I certainly hope all this can get worked out before the big Bear Country–Beartown game. But I’ve been wondering. How would you feel if Bertha Broom did wind up on the team?”

“That’s just it,” Brother said. “I don’t think I’d mind—not if she was really good enough to play. The more I think about the whole thing, the more I remember that awful look on Bertha’s face when the coach bawled her out and sent her packing. It might take a little while, but I’ll bet the guys could get used to her being on the team.”

“As the starting quarterback, your opinion should carry some weight in the locker room,” said Mama. “What would happen if you told the team how you felt?”

Brother rolled his eyes. “They’d just make fun of me. They’d call me a ‘girl-lover’ and stuff like that. Except for the ones who’d call me a ‘traitor,’ that is. Most of them are real stubborn about this, like Papa. If there were just some other way to get them to let Bertha try out …”

Mama looked down at Brother with a twinkle in her eye. “But you just said it yourself a minute ago!”

“What?” asked Brother.

“That the Bertha Broom problem is wrecking the whole season. If you pointed that out to your teammates and the coach …” Mama let her voice trail off to give Brother a chance to finish the thought.

Suddenly Brother’s eyes grew wide. “… then maybe they would let her try out just to get it all over with!” he exclaimed. “None of them think she can make the team, anyway. So they might go for it!”

“Good idea,” said Mama.

“Yeah! Glad I thought of it!” Brother cried. And he raced to the phone to call Cousin Freddy.