HOW had she ever thought Logan might have potential as a husband? Yes, their time at the corral with the pony had gone far better than the night before, and Cody had been just as reluctant to come back to the house as he’d been after his first ride on the pony.
But Logan was as bullheaded on the issue of where she slept on their wedding night as he’d been about getting married today. She might as well nickname him El Toro.
When they’d come back from the corrals, Claire had gone to her room to wash up while Cody went with Logan to the den. She’d discovered that all her things had vanished from the bathroom and closet. It didn’t take a Sherlock Holmes to conclude that she’d find them in the master bedroom and bath.
Because Elsa had gone home, Claire’s impending showdown with Logan promised to be a no-holds-barred shouting match after this. She thought about reclaiming her things right away but since Cody was still up, she prudently stayed in her room, pacing as she tried to calm down and think rationally about the ramifications before she rushed into battle.
The idea of sharing a bed this soon was ridiculous. Surely Logan knew that, because the man wasn’t dense. She believed it was an issue of male pride as he’d said, rather than anything sexual, but it probably also had a lot to do with the fact that Logan Pierce was simply determined to have his way in everything. Because Claire was used to having things all her way, they were bound to have some horrendous clashes if neither of them was willing to compromise.
On the other hand, though she’d been strong-armed into this marriage, it was surprising how much she wanted it to succeed. And yet she knew logically that success couldn’t happen in a marriage full of one-upmanship and hostility.
Claire sat down on the edge of the bed in the guest room to give that serious thought. Picturing the man’s earlier gentleness with Cody at the corrals made her feel warm toward him. It was obvious that Logan was capable of becoming just as wrapped up in Cody as she was, and of wholeheartedly parenting him in all the right ways, which could benefit Cody immeasurably.
Though Logan was awkward with the child and clearly didn’t yet comprehend the maturity level of two-year-olds, it was clear he was trying to understand, trying to do the right things.
He’d glanced her way a couple of times as if to silently seek her guidance and approval, and that worked powerfully on her estimation of him as a man. It had also worked powerfully on her heart.
In truth, she was no longer quite as averse to Logan’s dictate about tonight as she should have been. Part of that was because of those little glimpses of good in him. She couldn’t allow sexual intimacy, but perhaps simply sharing his bed wouldn’t be so terrible.
Confused by her seesawing attitude toward Logan but calmer now, Claire stood and left the guest room to see how Cody was doing with Logan. When she reached the den, she stood silently just outside the open door.
The scene on the carpet in front of the massive built-in shelves along one wall grabbed her by the heart. Logan lay on his side on the floor, with Cody kneeling opposite him. Between them was an impressive selection of small horses and cattle and mounted cowboys on other little horses, that obviously dated back to Logan’s childhood.
A rough wooden chest she’d noticed before in the hall now sat open behind Logan, and it was crammed with boyish treasures that included little cars and trucks, Tinkertoys and Lincoln Logs. Several colorful rocks that might have been collected by Logan and his brother on some childhood adventure lay scattered beside the chest and placed in various spots among the herd of horses and cattle and cowboys they played with.
Logan was setting some plastic fence panels just beyond the cattle herd to form a big corral. Cody looked on intently, holding horses and cattle in both hands as he watched every move Logan made as if he were memorizing everything the man did.
“All right, little cowpoke,” Logan said when he finished. “Better get some of those cows herded to the pen.”
And then he moved one of the mounted cowboys toward a cow before he released the cowboy and shifted his hand to the cow to “walk” it toward the corral.
Cody caught on and thrust the cow he had in one hand to the floor to scoot it on the carpet into the corral. In his eagerness, he knocked over a fence panel, but Logan calmly righted it then reclaimed his mounted cowboy to guide the small piece toward another cow.
The boy found a little bowlegged cowboy of his own, painstakingly stuck it on the horse he held, then pushed his horse and cowboy along the carpet to keep up with Logan’s. It was a beautiful demonstration of how to play with the old toys, and Cody’s little face was beaming with both joy and excitement as he tried to imitate the play.
Claire managed to pull her gaze away from the child to focus on the man. Logan was so gentle, and he appeared just as intent on the toy scene on the floor as Cody was. Claire didn’t want to say or do a thing to interrupt because the sight of all this was precious.
The jealousy she’d felt over Cody’s small acceptances of Logan last night was gone. It wasn’t just that marrying Logan had made her feel more secure, but that Logan hadn’t set out to manipulate the boy with either the pony or these toys. Claire sensed that everything Logan was doing was not an effort to win the boy away from her and cut her out, but to find some way to genuinely connect with his nephew and build a good relationship.
She probably ought to step quietly out of sight and find something else to do for a while, but Claire couldn’t seem to drag herself away.
Cody bumped down a row of fence panels and Logan again righted them as if it was merely part of the play. But then he stopped herding his cattle to simply watch Cody. There was a world of tenderness in Logan’s dark eyes and his harsh face was remarkably relaxed.
It made Claire curious to know what he was thinking. Perhaps he was remembering his brother and something from their childhood. She wondered briefly how much Cody resembled Logan’s brother, because he looked nothing like Farrah.
Claire began to realize that all her aggravations with Logan were evaporating as she stood there spying, and she liked him far more than she wanted to at this point.
She didn’t truly know Logan, and yet she suddenly had the feeling that she knew the most important things about him simply because of his treatment of Cody. As bizarrely as all this had started, Claire felt far less opposed to Logan after watching him like this. Instinct told her that love and family were much more important to Logan than he’d ever admit.
And she no longer believed he didn’t care about having love in his marriage. Judging by what she saw now, the real Logan Pierce wasn’t a heartless, cold-blooded dictator who had to have everything his way. There was some other reason that a man like him used everything at his disposal to arrange and rearrange the world around him. People who were driven to do that had likely been through something so painful that everything they did was an effort to protect themselves from other disasters.
Was that why he’d blackmailed her into marriage? He’d said he didn’t want the kind of wife who’d wear out the roads between here and San Antonio, which suggested some kind of extreme experience with that. Was it something to do with his mother? Some former lover or potential wife? And he was so uncertain of her that he wouldn’t allow her to go to settle her business in San Antonio without him.
Claire was swiftly rethinking all this, and wondering even more how she should handle things between them after these little insights. She could be mistaken about everything, but what if she’d figured out at least a few things?
Perhaps she should have stepped quietly away, because it wasn’t much longer before Cody stood up to brace his hands on Logan’s hip and reach into the toy box behind him. When he did, he caught sight of Claire, and immediately called out.
“Mommy! Come see! I gots horsies ’n’ cowboys.”
Claire walked on into the room just as Logan glanced her way. Another faint flush crept along his cheekbones, as if she’d caught him doing something unmanly, so she fixed her gaze on Cody instead as the little boy stood up to run to her with his cowboy and horse.
“See, Mommy?” he asked, barely giving her a chance to look at his new treasures before he turned to run back to the toys on the carpet.
Claire walked over, then got down on her knees to give Cody her complete attention as he showed her the little herd and picked out a horse and bowlegged cowboy for her to play with. She gamely put the small cowboy on the toy horse and posed it next to a couple cows that had fallen on their sides. She took a moment to right them, then glanced at Logan.
“Any orders from the trail boss?” she asked.
Logan gave her a sparkling look that she found quite appealing. “My top hand’s got most of them rounded up. Except for your two cows.” Logan nodded toward the ones she’d just straightened. “Better get ’em penned before dark.”
Claire gave him a small salute. “Do I say, ‘Sure thing, boss’?”
That got a faint smile out of him. “It’s time for workin’, not talkin’.”
Claire moved one of the cows forward, then the other, then moved her mounted cowboy along behind them. As she walked the two feet to the corral on her knees to accomplish that, she had the attention of both males.
“Will someone please close the gate?” she asked as she walked her cows inside. Cody eagerly reached over to slide a fence panel into place to close the corral, but he knocked over three other panels in the process. Claire watched as he and Logan put the panels back into place.
Claire eased back. “Well, now that the work’s done for the night, it’s time for little cowboys to get their bath done and their jammies on.”
It took Cody a moment to register what she’d said but when he did, he came up with an immediate, “No, Momma, no baff.”
“You and Uncle Logan can play tomorrow, sweetheart.”
“No, Momma, I wanna play.”
Claire was familiar with the refusals and delays Cody regularly came up with at bedtime, but instead of handling them herself this time, she looked over at Logan. “What do you think, Uncle Logan? Is it too early for little cowboys to get ready for bed?”
“It can’t be too early for little cowboys, because it’s about time for the big cowboys to do the same.”
His answer went completely over Cody’s head, and Claire pointed discreetly at the little boy who was now hoarding several of the small pieces as if he was determined to keep playing.
“It probably needs to be said a little plainer, Uncle,” she said and Logan sat up.
“Come on, son, let’s get the toys put away.”
Cody glanced up and Claire watched the wordless byplay between the two. Logan’s face was stern, though his dark eyes were alight. She held her breath while she waited to see what Cody would do.
As comfortable with Logan as Cody seemed to be, the big man was still a bit intimidating and Cody wasn’t as certain of him as he was of her. The boy looked down at the cattle and horses he’d gathered to himself, then picked up a few and got to his feet to walk around Logan and put the small toys in the big box.
Claire was content to watch as they picked up the pieces and stowed them away. The pleasure she felt watching the little boy do his best to imitate the big man made her emotional.
It was so, so clear to her that Logan would be good for Cody. In fact, she realized now how tragic it might have been if Logan hadn’t come into Cody’s life. Being without a father would have left a huge gap in the child’s upbringing, as well as in his heart, and Claire couldn’t help that she was more than a little glad Logan had pursued custody.
Though she knew that left her with a husband she hadn’t chosen and one she still wasn’t certain she could have a happy future with, it was a fact that this marriage might turn out to be no better or worse in the long run than if she’d been the one to do the choosing.
As Claire got to her feet, she decided this was as good a time as any to involve Logan with the whole bedtime process.
“Would you like to see how baths get taken, Uncle Logan? And I’ll bet someone would enjoy having you read the bedtime story.”
The glimmer of surprise in Logan’s dark eyes made her glad she’d thought of it. It was a goodwill gesture more than anything, but then, sharing everyday things with Logan, particularly where Cody was concerned, had to be the right thing to do.
And since she’d be sharing Logan’s bed in another hour or so, it might help her get over some of her own jitters about that if they spent a little time doing something normal and low-key together.
“Might as well get started with those kind of things,” he said before he reached down to pick Cody up then lift him higher to settle the wiggly boy on his wide shoulders.
Cody’s giggles lasted well into the hall and Claire trailed behind, her stomach beginning to knot in earnest as she faced the waning minutes between now and bedtime.
Logan had allowed her to use the bathroom first, so she showered and dressed in the nightgown and robe she’d packed. The ivory-colored, thigh-length nightgown suddenly seemed daringly short, and the V of the neckline felt a little too deep and wide.
She wanted badly to wear her light robe over it to sleep in, but she didn’t want to be ridiculous about this. She was twenty-four and an adult. She’d raised a child alone for the past two years, and she considered herself to be sensible and practical. She wasn’t normally the nervous type, and yet she couldn’t help feeling nervous now.
The important thing was to behave matter-of-factly. Logan was, no doubt, quite experienced sexually, but it would be a mistake to show any trace of nerves or to be skittish about this. Though sleeping in the same bed was rife with sexual possibilities, it was important to behave as if she wasn’t even remotely expecting any of them to happen tonight.
A woman who showed neither expectancy nor cowardice sent a strong “hands off” message, and was much more likely to project the warning that a firm boundary was in place.
Claire had handled an occasional unwanted pass before, so the same principles should apply, though it was a fact that she’d never dealt with an unwanted pass while lying next to a man in bed.
Since Logan wasn’t waiting nearby for his turn in the shower, Claire sat down on the edge of the mattress. Perhaps when it came right down to it tonight, Logan would let her off the hook. She was nervously toying with the ends of her robe belt as she considered stepping down the hall to check on Cody, when Logan walked into the bedroom.
He must have taken his shower in one of the other guest bathrooms, and the sight of him was arresting. She’d never seen his kind of bare maleness up close, and it was as unsettling as it was somehow thrilling to look at him.
The navy-blue pajama bottoms he wore barely registered because her gaze was fixed on the muscled expanse above them. His bare chest and torso, shoulder and arms looked as if they’d been carved from granite. It surprised her that his skin was tanned, but it was. His chest carried just the right amount of hair and she was glad of that because she didn’t care for men with furry chests.
Her gaze drifted downward to his pajama bottoms, noted that the waist of them rested a little low on his hips, then traveled all the way down his long legs to feet that were big and almost perfectly sculpted. The man was a work of art, and she couldn’t keep her gaze from tracking all the way back up to his face.
His expression was stony and solemn, as if he meant to be all business with her. But there was an intensity in his dark eyes that arrowed straight through her and made her incapable of moving.
If she’d had to make a guess, she’d say that look was a no-nonsense warning of some kind, or maybe one that established dominance without speaking a word. But it was also sexy as all get out, and Claire couldn’t seem to help that her insides were quivering or that the heat that bloomed deep in her middle was suffusing her skin with warmth. It was a good thing she was sitting down because she wasn’t certain her legs would have held her up. Then he spoke and she felt the warmth wash through her and go scorching.
“So you’re gonna to do it.”
It wasn’t a question but a statement that told her plainly he’d expected otherwise. There was a spark of amusement in his gaze as he stared over at her. But he wasn’t only staring into her eyes, he was staring at everything else, lingering on her bare knees for a moment before his gaze dropped to her toes. Her robe and nightgown felt distinctly transparent, and though her mouth was dry, she decided to take the small opening he’d unknowingly given her.
“I’d understood from you that Elsa does bed checks, that she’s a compulsive and fluent gossip, and that your male ego couldn’t survive the shame if everyone found out that your wife wouldn’t sleep with you.”
Claire lifted her brows as if to prompt his confirmation, but went on too quickly for him to give one. “So that’s why I’m here, doing my humble best to uphold your reputation.”
Something in his rugged face softened, as if he might have been bracing himself for some worse kind of resistance from her.
“Might as well climb in,” he said, squashing her feeble hope that he’d change his mind.
The moment she’d dreaded had come, and Claire had to force herself to appear calm. She stood and turned toward the bed, dropping her gaze to the mattress as she untied the belt of her robe, striving to do it as casually and unselfconsciously as if she’d been alone in her bedroom at home.
Logan walked around the bed to his side and it was a little tougher to slip off her robe and drape it across the foot of the bed. Claire felt his dark gaze travel down her, and she braved the challenge to get into bed without making it look like she was desperate to keep the hem of her nightgown at a modest level. She almost couldn’t take in a full breath until she could pull up the comforter.
The mattress dipped a little as Logan lay down beside her. She immediately felt the heat of his body and lay perfectly still, starting up at the ceiling as she gripped the edge of the covers.
Logan rolled toward her and suddenly his stony face loomed over hers. His fist was braced on the mattress by her hip, effectively trapping her. Whatever aftershave he’d used was subtle and musky and a little sweet. And he had used aftershave because she could see that he’d shaved.
He was so close that the heat pouring off his body made her skin prickle hotly, melting her insides, melting her bones, and he had yet to touch her at all.
His dark gaze seemed to be memorizing every feature of her flushed face, and she was helpless to do anything but stare back. His voice was a low rasp.
“I owe you an apology, Claire.”
If he’d wanted to surprise her, he’d got the job done. She searched his gaze for a clue to what he was talking about and if he was sincere about the word “apology.” It was on the tip of her tongue to ask him which thing he was apologizing for, since she could think of several, but she didn’t.
“An apology?”
“When I said you needed more glamour. Something must have been wrong with my eyesight yesterday, because I can’t see anything about the way you look that I’d want to change. I apologize.”
Claire was instantly suspicious, though she didn’t detect any insincerity. He wasn’t overly earnest and he sounded matter-of-fact. As if he was simply informing her that he’d corrected an errant opinion. But he was also letting her know that he wasn’t so upset about his error that he meant to grovel and beg for her forgiveness. Just that he’d been mistaken and was apologizing.
“I appreciate that. Thank you.” Claire couldn’t help that she still felt suspicious of his motives. On the other hand, it would be a pretty shallow ploy—if it was a ploy—to get on her good side. She sensed he wasn’t the kind of man to resort to flattery or shallow ploys. As he’d already proved, he was too blunt and determined to get his way for such namby-pamby methods.
She saw the glint in his dark eyes and knew right away that he was about to kiss her. Leery of that, she put up a hand as he started to lean down, and her fingers were suddenly pressing against his mouth.
Claire was surprised she’d actually done that, but she didn’t want a kiss like the one last night. Not here, not now. And certainly not until she felt more comfortable sharing a bed with him.
“What if you just gave me a regular kiss good-night?” she asked, unable to keep the telling tremor out of her voice as she slipped her fingers from his lips. His rugged expression was going grim, and she felt the need to soften what his pride might take as a rejection. “S-something gentle and…sweet.” She made herself give him a wry smile as she added, “A kiss that doesn’t try to set the bed on fire.”
It must have been the right thing to say because his expression gentled and his dark eyes glittered with interest. “You’re runnin’ scared, huh?” Claire’s gaze shifted awkwardly from his.
“All of this has been so sudden, and I need time to adjust. You’d seemed to indicate that one of the reasons you chose me was because of my prudent lifestyle, so please understand that I can’t instantly give you everything you said you wanted in a wife.”
She made herself look up at him and felt the hard blush that stung her cheeks. “Yes, you showed me last night that you could get me to lose control, but I don’t…want that so soon. At least not until we’re more…used to each other. And we’ve rushed so much. Please, let’s not rush everything.”
Logan smiled faintly. “You talk a lot, Claire.”
“But you’re listening, aren’t you,” she said, and it wasn’t a question.
Logan’s dark head descended slowly and Claire suddenly knew this kiss would be the gentle alternative she’d asked for. What she hadn’t anticipated was how deeply it would affect her.
Tenderly, oh so very tenderly, Logan’s cool, hard lips touched hers. If this had been another carnal, dominating kiss like the one last night, it would have done nothing more than arouse her lust and her heart might have remained aloof.
But the exquisite care he took with this one was breathtakingly sweet. She would never have imagined that Logan Pierce was capable of such a kiss, and Claire couldn’t seem to help that her heart simply opened up.
Like the petals of a flower being coaxed by the warmth of the sun to open and unfurl, her heart trembled and began to grow warm and relax, and then to shyly reach out. Her fingers somehow imitated that trembling, shy reach for warmth, and she felt every tantalizing sensation as her fingertips touched his lean jaw, then pushed lightly and shakily into his hair.
A sparkling delight she’d never suspected was possible seemed to invade her and slowly drench her with pleasure, and she couldn’t seem to help that her emotions were rising with something that felt a whole lot like joy.
As if for the very first time her heart was encountering something rare and wonderful and unique, coming close to touching something it had craved for a very long time. Whatever that something was, it suddenly seemed essential to her as a woman, and it somehow promised to be as fulfilling as it was desirable.
Too soon Logan’s lips eased away, though they didn’t go far. He trailed them lightly against her flushed cheek then on to her ear where he pressed a relaxed kiss before he pressed another just below her ear. His lips moved lazily down her neck before he stopped kissing her and his arms tightened fiercely around her for long, thundering moments.
He pulled one arm away to reach out and switch off the lamp before he slid it beneath her again. And then he moved onto his side, taking her with him to settle them face-to-face.
Claire rested snugly against him in the darkness, so deeply shaken and confused by that kiss that she couldn’t speak. She was grateful he couldn’t see her face, though she would have liked to see his and been able to read his reaction.
It was suddenly one of the most satisfying pleasures of her life to rest her hands against his warm, hard chest, feeling the solid rhythm of his heart beneath her palms as she savored the safe, protected feeling of being wrapped in his arms.
While she was luxuriating in every sensation and wondering what this all meant, Claire slowly drifted off to sleep, more at peace than she could ever remember being.