Chapter Ten
Samantha sank into the springy mattress and attempted to dry her wet hair. A clear waste of time, she wrinkled her nose at the towel, too small for the job. Ticked off, she leaned back against the metal frame and stared at the ceiling. The smell of coffee wafted in through the door. Her stomach grumbled. She hadn’t eaten much today. Breakfast consisted of two cups of coffee and she skipped lunch. Fifteen minutes passed in agonizing slowness.
Unable to stand the aroma any longer, she jumped to her feet and ventured outside. Cody lay stretched out on a blanket in front of a blazing fire. Propped on one elbow, he chewed on a blade of grass.
Approaching the fire, Samantha stopped. “May I join you?”
He glanced up from his haven and gestured at the ground. “Sure.”
She hurried back inside the cabin, returned with the other blanket, and placed it on the ground opposite. Samantha sat down, bent her head forward, and attempted to dry her hair from the heat of fire. Throwing her head back, she finger-brushed her hair then conducted a silent survey of the grounds.
An enchanting picture, the silvery moonlight cascaded down on the luxuriant green carpet of ferns and grass. The gentle trickle of a nearby stream and the glow of the fire enhanced the setting. Undeniably romantic, she simply needed a willful lover. Her gaze rested on her companion.
She studied him through veiled lashes. Calm and serene, his hair appeared damp and slightly messy. He probably took a quick dip in the spring. Up close and without his hat, the man was broodingly gorgeous. She watched, fascinated, as the firelight played on his hair, adding depth to the rich chestnut brown color. Her fingers itched to run through its glossy softness. Cody oozed blatant sex appeal and an attitude there was nothing he couldn’t handle. Samantha wondered if he realized the effect he had on women.
His relaxed face softened the fine lines around his mouth and gave him a vulnerable boyish appearance. A stark contrast to his morbid expression she observed since her arrival. Staring languidly into the fire, he appeared lost in thought.
Her gaze wandered to his mouth recalling their shared kiss. Instant heat cascaded through her body. His lips were full and seductive shadowed by light stubble yet coarse enough to chafe the insides of her thighs with sensual pleasure. Drifting further down, her gaze rested on his neck and chest visible through the top two open buttons of his shirt. His skin appeared nearly bronze against the firelight.
Samantha itched to touch his bare skin. To run her hands over his defined six-pack abs she’d drooled over, twice. Continuing her furtive inspection, she stared at his masculine hands and long fingers resting against the blanket. She wondered if the callouses on them were rough, or would they add the right amount of friction on her skin. Her gaze slid lower, roamed over his long powerful legs. Yes…definitely the perfect lover for a romantic night like this.
Perfect but not willful.
The furtive scrutiny ended abruptly. Cody sat up and leaned forward. He poured then handed her a mug of steaming coffee. With a guilty blush, she accepted the mug. “Thank you.”
Silently, Samantha watched as he prepared their meal. His mannerisms held a sense of care, something she didn’t see before. Then again, she hadn’t the opportunity previously to scrutinize him this close. What little she perceived, exhibited the same officious arrogance equating to her father’s usual behavior. Perhaps it was this care though, which made his personality dissimilar to her father. The same caring, which Deborah gave her wholehearted love for her brother, despite his pompous indifference to her relationship with Steven. Obviously, there was a lot more to Cody Bentley she didn’t know. Time, however, wasn’t an easy pleasure. Her holiday would be long over before she figured him out.
Cody handed her a plate, drawing her out of her contemplative silence. They dined on canned beef stew and crackers which appeased Samantha’s hungry tummy yet did nothing to satisfy the subliminal hunger lurking in the depths of her womanly core. The bold realization startled her and she choked on the cracker she chewed.
“Are you okay?”
Her heart rate vaulted when her gaze locked with Cody’s. The inherent concern in his enigmatic eyes puzzled her briefly. Did the man even begin to understand the power he wielded with one look from those intense baby blues? Samantha nodded and dropped her gaze. Did she mistake his concern with raw desire? Stop it, Sam. What in God’s name is happening? She needed to break this strange spell. “Can I ask you a question?”
He nodded but didn’t look up. “Sure.”
Setting aside her plate, Samantha conducted a mental search for the right words. “Why do you hate women so much?”
Startled, his head snapped up. His lips shifted from a smile to a scowl. Damn, there goes the harmony. She waited for the onslaught of perpetual rudeness.
Instead, he answered dryly, “My experiences with the fairer sex have…what you’d say, left a bad taste in my mouth.”
“Care to elaborate.”
Cody shrugged his shoulders carelessly and got to his feet. “I don’t think it will interest you.” His voice held a faint trace of iciness as he stepped away.
Samantha persisted. “I beg to differ, Cody.” The use of his name made him turn. One dark brow jerked upward. “You’ve been rude since the day we met. I think I deserve an explanation, don’t you?” He zoned out again on another reflective journey. Samantha tried reading in his expression, seeing the battle raging in his head.
A moment later, he hunkered down in front of the fire and gazed at the flames. “My father hired my mother as a housekeeper to care for my grandma. Three months later, grandma passed away. Close to his mother, Dad took her death badly. Somewhere between work and tears he found comfort in my mother’s arms. Not long after, they married. After my birth, people started talkin’, warned Dad she wasn’t a good fit. He ignored them and worked hard, day and night. She spent her days sleeping with the ranch hands and nights spending his money at parties.”
Samantha observed the tightening of his jaw and the pulsating nerve near his temple. Reliving his past appeared to be a painful experience. Her heart bled for him and his pain.
“Just after my sixteenth birthday, she told him she wanted out. As a cattle rancher, my father’s business grew, obviously too slow for her liking. My mother wanted riches, a life filled with comfort and luxury. Out of the blue, she ran off with some rich oil bloke, she met at a party. Being tied down by kids wasn’t part of her big plan.” He shuddered with the pain of pent up emotions.
“They say love is blind, and my father, was blind to my mother’s wild ways ’cause he loved her, unconditionally. A man could stay without food for a few weeks, he could stay without water for a few days, and without air for a few seconds. Without hope, however, a man shrivels up and dies. My father aged twenty years overnight. He shut himself up in his room with the bottle as his only comfort. I reckon a mighty big part of him died the day she walked out. I tried my best to assume the reins on the ranch. A year after my mother left home, she died in a car accident with her boyfriend. That stressed my father even more and, like a zombie, he threw himself into his work, until his death two years later.” On a disgruntled exhale, Cody thrust a hand through his hair, stretched out a leg and leaned back on one hand.
Anguished, Samantha jumped up, skirted the fire and dropped down beside Cody. She took his roughened hand in hers. “I’m so sorry.”
The corners of his mouth dipped in a smile laden with a wealth of pain and regret. “Barely seventeen, I left school and took over the ranch. Dad and I worked hard to make a success of it. I guess when my mother left she not only killed my father’s love for life, but my spirit to trust and love. I swore I’d never let the twins and Jace suffer the same fate as my father and made sure education became a priority.” Cody took a deep breath through his nose and let it out slowly.
Samantha now understood. To protect his family from reliving a painful past, he became hard and tenacious. It was only natural. Swiftly, it dawned on her why her father was so protective. He shielded her from the cruel, harsh realities of the world. She refocused her attention when Cody spoke again.
“The twins were six and Jace nine. They don’t know our mother ran off and Jace. He’s still not clear on the facts. I told them she died in an accident. I vowed I’d never tell them the truth. While I may be a tyrant to some, hurting my brothers and sister would kill me. It’s better they think I’m a downright bully.” His reflective gaze stared at the flames as he fought some hidden demon. “I know families go through tough times and couples disagree but for a mother to leave her kids behind and walk out, is difficult to understand.”
An almost maternal tenderness washed over Samantha. No wonder the man erected such a severe barrier, shutting everyone out. Cody suffered a fate far worse than most teens his age. The pain forced him to substitute ambition for emotion. Deborah’s perpetual loyalty suddenly made sense. The man sacrificed everything for their happiness while nothing else mattered. A truly commendable feat. Gently, she squeezed the hand she held.
“Two years ago, I met one of Debbie’s friends. Someone who actually appeared normal or so I thought. Within a couple of months, we grew close. Then, Rachel declared her love. I told her I don’t fall in love so easily. I reckoned love required time and patience. She wanted total commitment, straightaway. Somethin’ I wasn’t ready for at the time. Rachel wanted a child…” Hesitation broke his words. “At least, I frickin’ thought so. To bring a child into this world, demands love and trust. I told her I didn’t have the time or the desire for either and it made her unhappy. I love children and I want my own someday, but I have to be ready for them, both mentally and physically. At the time I wasn’t.” The scowl on his face deepened at some unpleasant memory.
Samantha held his clenched fist in her hand. She massaged it with tenderness until he calmed down and relaxed his fingers.
“Two days later, she convinced me everythin’ was okay. Couple of weeks later, Rachel dropped a bombshell. She was pregnant. For a while I believed the condom broke and remained furious with my carelessness. She told Debbie I didn’t want the child. My sister, as expected, gave me the third degree…” he trailed off, his jaw clenched angrily.
“Cody, you don’t have to go on.”
“Unfortunately, I found her in bed with one of the ranch hands.” His wry laugh filled the night’s silence.
“No.” Samantha gasped in dismay. Oh, God, the poor man.
“When Debbie asked what happened, I chose silence. Rachel’s pregnancy was a scam. She wanted to hook a wealthy husband while she slept with the ranch hands.” His muscles tensed as his eyes filled with sardonic amusement. “Ironic, isn’t it.”
“What is?”
“The one woman I wanted a meaningful relationship with, turns out to be like my mother.” His brow creased in a frown which lent his face an angry grimace.
She massaged his hand tenderly. Faith dealt him the same blow twice. How awful. Life just isn’t fair. Tormented for love. It now explained his rudeness toward women. She really didn’t blame his behavior. Her throat constricted. Her heart cried out for the pain he’d suffered.
Samantha cupped his chin and gently eased his face in her direction. She met his gaze, pain swelling rigidly in her throat. So rigid it broke in a huge sob. “I’m so sorry, Cody. No man deserves such treatment. Reliving your mother’s desertion through your girlfriend’s betrayal isn’t fair.” She hesitated. “You’re destined to meet someone, and you will learn to the trust again. I know this isn’t the time, but let’s put aside our differences and be friends,” Samantha whispered, her heart heavy. Cody nodded.
The visible agony she read in his eyes. It was sheer torture. Steadily, the need to comfort him and ease his pain grew. Kneeling, she enveloped him in a bear like hug and held on until his ragged breathing eased to slow even breaths. Her chin on his head, the fresh smell of spring water and shampoo remnants filled her nostrils.