Theo took the stairs to his apartment two at a time. Since the day he moved in, he told himself he could be out in half a day. The clock was ticking. Once inside, he was distracted by the sight of the unmade bed. It had been a long day and he'd only gotten a few hours of sleep between the time he got home from Frenzy's and the time he had to take off for the moving job. He'd been fighting off a bone-crushing weariness all afternoon.
He needed to rest, except the minute he stopped moving he would think about Ester and the ache in his chest. The boxes from the move-in were broken down and stored behind the dresser. He got them out, then searched for the packing tape.
The words he'd said to her replayed in his head. He couldn't shut them out. He'd run himself into the ground and, when it went wrong, had taken it out on the best thing that ever happened to him. He was alone again.
The meal she saved for him sat heavy in his gut and left a sour taste in his throat. This reminded him of all the worst things he'd done in his life, like dropping out of school or wrecking his mother's car or taking money from her wallet when money was tight. It made him sick to remember how bad he'd been to his mother.
He reconstructed the first box and pulled clothes out of the closet. He was tempted to shove everything in as fast as he could but he needed to use care to make it fit in a single car-load. What had Ester said about this place…kinda sad?
He rolled his clothes into tight bundles. When he'd moved in, the pared down approach seemed advantageous. Now, all he could think about was Ester's look of pity when he told her how easy it would be to move out.
No matter how great their thing was, this ending was inevitable. Ester was never going to end up with a guy like him. She thought he was okay now, but it was only a matter of time before she realized how little he had to offer.
He checked the time. He needed to call his mom and tell her what was going on but hadn't figured out what to say. She would be crushed to learn he dropped out. He'd done his best, and this was how it ended. Any ideas for the future were drowned in the thought of everything he was running out on. His lease wasn't up until summer. Jess would be left without his most reliable mover. Frenzy's would need a new bouncer. Plus, quitting school now meant he was giving up the classes that he was actually passing.
He filled the box in front of him, then pushed it aside and assembled another.
He spotted a scrap of black fabric balled up on the floor and grabbed it and shook it out. A pair of Ester's panties. Any other woman and he would assume she'd left them on purpose, but not Ester. Now she had one less set of matching underwear.
He paused with them in his hand, not sure what to do. He couldn't throw them in the trash. Tossing them in the laundry didn't make sense. He threw them on the bed; he would figure it out later.
He was shoving things into box number three, when his phone rang. There was no one he wanted to talk to, and it was too late in the day for a moving job. It was a surprise to see Arnie's name on the display.
"This is Theo."
"Bad time?" Arnie said.
It's all bad time, Theo wanted to say but instead he said, "Not really. What do you need?"
"I'm in a pinch. It's not a great job, but the pay is good."
Theo had no interest, but he asked anyway, "What is it?"
"I need an intern coordinator."
Theo tried to imagine what an intern coordinator might do and what skills Arnie thought he had that would lead him to call. "You called me?"
"You did great with the other work. It's National Association of Tribal Governments. It's a great networking opportunity for you," Arnie said.
It was like Theo had stumbled into someone else's conversation. Arnie had the wrong idea if he thought Theo was a guy with something to network about.
The unpacked boxes leaned against the bed, ready to be filled and loaded into the car. "I can't—"
"The timing is terrible, I know. You've got school and all your jobs. It's enough money to cover some of your jobs. It'll be a time sink during the conference but we can accommodate for school as needed. School is the priority."
Those were Ester's words. School is the most important thing. When she'd said it, he'd taken it like she was scolding him. When Arnie said it, it was a bitter reminder of what people expected from him.
"I appreciate the thought but I wouldn't have the first idea how to—"
"You think I know what I'm doing?" Arnie laughed. "I've been faking it for over a decade. Common sense and confident words can take you far. There's an intern meeting tomorrow night. I'll text you the details. All you need to do is show up."
"You're not going to let me say no," Theo said without humor.
Arnie laughed again. "I'm not. See you then."
Theo stacked the packed boxes against the wall and put the unassembled boxes back behind the dresser. Arnie bought him some time to figure out what to say to his mom. Maybe he could make some calls about job training so he would be set up when he got there.
His books still sat on the kitchen table. In his head he'd already given up on school, but now that he was going to be in town, might as well finish the quarter.