Minor Conversations—No More

A ROOM

Two LADIES stand or sit. Or both. DEB and CARRIE.

DEB: This is bullshit.

CARRIE: What is?

DEB: All of it. It’s fucking bullshit. Tell me. I look like a cliché to you?

Carrie doesn’t know quite how to answer.

DEB: I know. Stupid question, right?

CARRIE: Not necessarily.

DEB: Well, I’m not. I’m no specific way. Certainly not something regular. Who is? We’re all special. Are we special?

CARRIE: I think so.

DEB: I’m not saying special like something ordinary out of the ordinary, that’s not what I’m saying. No better or worse. I just don’t want to be in a box. You wanna be in a box?

CARRIE: No. Certainly not.

DEB: You wanna be thrown into a pile with everyone else?

CARRIE: I don’t.

DEB: Right. Well, neither do I. I’m me. I’m not someone else.

CARRIE: That’s right.

DEB: Nobody is everybody. Am I right?

CARRIE: We’re all very specific and different, that’s correct. Here we are.

DEB: Do you drink?

CARRIE: I try not to.

DEB: What is that?

CARRIE: What is what?

DEB: Forget it.

CARRIE: I’m sorry.

DEB: Whatever. You either drink or you don’t. Do it or don’t. I’m saying in general. Nothing personal, I’m saying. Maybe I need a drink.

CARRIE: That’s what I mean. I try not to need.

DEB: Oh, really? Is that right? So what? I’m a jerk because I need something? I’m going through something here. This guy smokes, that guy does something else. What’s wrong with a drink?

CARRIE: There’s nothing wrong with a drink. Why are you attacking me?

DEB: I have no choice. You’re the only one here.

CARRIE: Fair enough.

DEB: You think I’m an animal?

Deb waits.

DEB: Do you?

CARRIE: I think you might be a little rough around the ends, but I don’t know if I’d call you an animal.

Deb studies her.

DEB: What about you?

CARRIE: Me?

DEB: Yes, you. We just established no one else is here. You. What about you?

CARRIE: What about me, what?

DEB: I don’t know. I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry.

CARRIE: It’s fine. Don’t be.

DEB: No, I am. I’m so sorry. I’m really a mess. It’s not you, it’s obviously me. I don’t know what to tell you. I’m just…

CARRIE: It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me anything. I get it. I mean, not it specifically, but we all have our things.

Carrie waits.

DEB: Yes, we do.

CARRIE: Our own specific things that have nothing to do with anybody else.

Deb checks her out. She’s okay.

DEB: I’m Deb.

CARRIE: Hi Deb.

Deb waits.

DEB: You don’t have a name?

CARRIE: No, I do.

Deb nods her head. She gets it.

DEB: Fuck you, lady.

THE END