LATER THAT SUNDAY evening Felipe emerged into the domestic terminal of Buenos Aires airport after his flight from Mendoza, his frustration and impatience an itch under his skin.
The flight home had seemed endless.
He checked his watch. Seven-thirty p.m. Not too late to call Emilia. She’d probably be at home, alone or perhaps with Eva. She’d texted him earlier today to let him know that all was well. But it wasn’t, not with him. His stomach lurched with fear. He should never have let her leave.
Turning to Thiago and Violetta behind him, he dropped his overnight bag and held open his arms. ‘Well, have a wonderful honeymoon, you two.’ He kissed Violetta on the cheek and hugged Thiago, pasting on a fake smile.
The couple had been on the same flight from Mendoza—the one Emilia and he were supposed to take together before she’d run out on him Saturday night. The newlyweds were heading to the international terminal to take their connecting flight to the Caribbean island of Aruba for two weeks.
‘We will,’ Violetta said, stepping back, but Thiago hesitated.
‘Darling,’ his brother said to his new wife, ‘could you give me a second? I just need some brotherly advice.’
‘Of course.’ Violetta smiled encouragingly at both men and ambled a short distance away to give them privacy.
‘What’s up,’ Felipe asked, impatient to be on his way. Maybe he’d forget calling and simply knock on Emilia’s door. He had to do something to make things right before he lost his mind, because the last time they’d spoken his words had come out wrong, his feelings tripping him up. He needed to make her want him again. ‘I hope you’re not going to ask me what to expect on your honeymoon, because you’re a little old for the birds and bees talk.’
His joke masked the painful hollow feeling in his chest. All he’d wanted to do since he’d watched Emilia drive away was chase her down and beg her to reconsider. It had taken her leaving him stranded in the dark to realise that he’d fallen madly in love with her, and he had no idea what to do about it. But missing her was a physical pain all over his body. He needed to see her, to beg her to give him another chance.
‘I was going to ask you what’s up, actually,’ Thiago said, ignoring Felipe’s attempt at humour. ‘You haven’t really been present since Emilia left last night. I know you tried to convince everyone that you two are just friends, but it’s time to be real.’ Thiago tilted his head sympathetically. ‘Especially because you’re acting as if she cut out your heart when she left.’
Felipe gripped the back of his neck and exhaled noisily. He was fifty-five years old. He didn’t need love-life advice from his little brother. Except maybe he did. Because Thiago was right. His heart had been ripped out. Maybe he should hear his brother out, seeing as on his own he’d made such a mess of his relationship with Emilia.
‘If you must know,’ Felipe said with a sigh, ‘we were more than friends, but it’s over. She broke things off before she left the wedding. Said she couldn’t risk having feelings for me.’
Thiago frowned, looking as confused as Felipe felt. ‘Sounds like she already has feelings for you, just like you have for her. She was probably just running scared.’
Felipe glanced at the floor, impotence a heavy weight on his shoulders. ‘You’ve been married a day and you’re already an expert on relationships?’
Thiago shrugged, nonplussed. ‘I am an expert on some relationships. I know, for example, that you still have some warped big brother over-protective streak when it comes to me, and a sense of guilt because you didn’t want to run Castillo Estates.’
Felipe pressed his lips together. He didn’t want to have this conversation, least of all in a public place. But he couldn’t let Thiago go on his honeymoon with this accusation unresolved.
‘It wasn’t your calling,’ Thiago added before Felipe could interject. ‘The rest of the family accepted that years ago. You’re a much better doctor than you are a winemaker anyway. We’re all proud of you. You’re the only person who can’t let it go. It’s like you’re scared to let yourself be happy again.’
Felipe shook his head. Having discussed it with Emilia, he had begun to let it go. She’d already pointed out his flawed thinking about his family. She’d given him a reason to question the status quo of his life. But Thiago was right. Again. Felipe had punished himself long enough for the things he saw as his failings.
‘I can let it go,’ he said, meeting Thiago’s stare. ‘And I’m proud of you and what you’ve achieved with the business. You’re right. I wouldn’t have been half as good as you at running the estate because it’s not my passion.’
Thiago slapped Felipe’s arm with enthusiasm. ‘Whereas I’m excited by the challenges. I can’t wait to watch my family grow up surrounded by the ancient vines. And Violetta feels the same way. It wasn’t your calling but it’s ours.’
Felipe nodded, his throat tight with emotion. Had he spent so long feeling guilty about his career choices and his failed marriage that he’d overlooked what made him excited? His career, for sure, but also someone to share all the good things in his life with. Emilia.
‘But back to Emilia,’ Thiago pressed. ‘Did you tell her how you feel about her?’
‘No.’ Felipe winced, feeling stupid. ‘I tried, but that just seemed to make things worse.’ Because instead of telling her he had feelings for her, instead of telling her he’d fallen in love with her, he’d held back out of fear that he couldn’t be what she needed, that he’d somehow let her down. Only now, it was so obvious. Even if she still didn’t want him, even if she was still protecting her vulnerable heart, Emilia needed to know that he’d fallen head over heels in love with her anyway.
‘So you let her run scared?’ Thiago pointed out.
‘Like I said, it’s much more complicated second time around,’ Felipe said, absolutely gutted that he’d allowed her to walk away without telling her how he felt. ‘I was trying not to scare her off. She’ll always love her husband, and I’ve no desire to make the same mistakes I did with Delfina.’
‘Just because Emilia loves her husband doesn’t mean that she can’t love you, too,’ Thiago said, making it all sound so straightforward.
Felipe shook his head, speechless. Could Emilia love him back? Was that what she’d meant when she’d said ‘before we both get our hearts broken’? He needed to go to her—right now—and sort this out.
But Thiago hadn’t finished. ‘And you can’t take all the blame for your divorce. I’ve heard that Delfina has moved on, so why can’t you?’
‘That’s a great question.’ Why couldn’t he move on? Why was he punishing himself? Didn’t he also deserve happiness?
As if he’d heard the unasked question, Thiago said, ‘The family want to see you content, that’s all. We love you. We want what’s best for you, whatever that is. But don’t let fear, either yours or Emilia’s, stop you from being honest about your feelings. Tell her how you feel and what you want and take it from there.’
Felipe nodded, pulling Thiago in for one final hug. ‘Thanks for the pep talk, little brother. Now go and enjoy your honeymoon. I have to go to Emilia.’
Because, just like Emilia, he did deserve to be happy. Only to achieve that he needed her. With a fresh sense of urgency, he grabbed his bag and took off running towards the taxi rank.