Kellan arrived by mid-afternoon, an expectant smile fading when she saw her mother’s face. “How could they have done this to you?” She hugged her mother gently, hoping there had been no other bruises, before pulling back and scrutinizing her. “Have you seen a doctor?”
Elizabeth shook her head.
“Why not?” Kellan asked, concern sharpening her voice. “Something could be broken.”
Elizabeth hooked her arm around her daughter’s and walked inside the house with her. “Because it’s better than it was yesterday. Truly. So don’t worry. Tell me what you’ve been doing.”
Kellan flopped down on one of the kitchen chairs, looked at her poor beat-up mother, then grinned. “Nothing as exciting as you. Same old college grind. Papers, books, reading, projects, exams. Now, let’s get back to this drug deal—do you have a lawyer, or are you going to plead guilty or what?”
Elizabeth tore a piece of a paper napkin into little balls and rubbed them around on the table, enjoying the feeling of something underneath her fingertips. It gave her something mindless to do while she put together an answer.
“I talked with Carol. She said she would call around and see what she could find. She offered me one of her lawyers but they’re all in LA, and since I’m not going to pay a lot for a legal defense, she said she’d find someone local.”
When the phone began ringing again, Elizabeth listened to the machine. When she heard Carol’s voice on the other end, she picked it up. “Hi, Carol, guess who’s come to see me. No, not . . . Kellan, yeah. Someone showed her my picture in the paper and she insisted on checking up on me. Sure, I’ll put her on. What’s that? Oh, you talked to Michael? How was he—upset?” She listened intently, frowning. “I never said I didn’t want to talk to him; I said I didn’t want to bother him. There is a difference. He found me someone? That’s great. Sure, here she is.” Elizabeth handed the phone over, murmuring, “Your fairy godmother.”
She heard them talk without listening to what they said, thinking about Carol. Michael was upset because he thought she didn’t want him to call her, but it wasn’t true. She would love to hear from him . . . but she didn’t want to see him, not yet. Especially not with a bruised face; she shuddered thinking of his reaction. Still, memories and feelings suddenly swamped her and she felt her eyes burn with a wetness she would not let out. The past was the past. She could deal only with the present.
Would things always be this complicated?
Elizabeth mouthed she was going to the bathroom and left. After a few moments of chatter, Kellan hung up the phone and was rooting around the refrigerator for a snack when the doorbell rang.
“Kellan, get that please?”
“Sure.” She shut the fridge and walked quickly to the foyer.
She opened the door, and for the rest of her life Kellan would never forget this defining moment. Hearing the door open, the tall man turned to look at her from the bottom step.
Blue eyes met brown ones and time stopped. A hush swelled between them, a moment of anticipation. A humming started as two unique melodies waited to meet for the first inevitable time.
Kellan and Gregory had both done a dangerous thing. They had put shutters on their souls, an act of control that is only an illusion. It’s an act of will that in reality only exposes the most vulnerable places. By refusing all the gifts that love has to offer, they allowed its surprise to cut right into their hearts.
Kellan, standing very still, fell into his smile with a wonder as new and old as time itself. Gregory’s heart was thumping wildly, tangling with emotions he thought were under his control.
Elizabeth looked over Kellan’s shoulder. “Gregory? Hello.”
The startled shock on his face made her hand reach up to cover the bruise. “It’s getting better.”
His breath came out in a rush. “Elizabeth, I’m sorry. If there’s anything I can do—” He felt awful; her cheek was swollen, an angry mottle of purples and blues.
“No, I don’t need a thing. Won’t you come in? Oh, and this is my daughter, Kellan. Kellan, Gregory Jamison.”
Kellan shivered at the brief touch of his skin and then the handshake was over. They followed Elizabeth into the kitchen and sat around the table. “Can I get you anything?”
Gregory blinked; for a moment he forgot why he had even come.
“Um, no, thank you, ma’am, no. I was visiting my mother and while I was at the store for her, I saw Dr. Meade. You know him, don’t you?”
Elizabeth nodded.
“He saw the story and the picture about you and said to tell that little girl he’d be glad to testify on her behalf if she needs anyone from the medical community to back her up on the use of medicinal marijuana.”
“He did?” She was touched. “Thank him for me, please. I’ll certainly tell my lawyer about his offer. Everything is . . . a jumble right now. I won’t be sure of what I’ll be doing until I see the lawyer my husband has found for me.”
He smiled.
“Who’s Dr. Meade, Mom?” Kellan thought it was time she got into this conversation.
As Elizabeth explained, Gregory kept glancing her way and tried to ignore this tug at his heart that had started the moment their eyes met. He sternly reminded himself this was Elizabeth’s daughter. One person in the family with an awful illness was more than enough.
He forced his eyes elsewhere while he got his thoughts under control. As soon as there was a lull in the conversation, he rose to leave.
“Well, that’s all I came to tell you. Let me know if you or your lawyer wants to talk to him. You’ve got my number, right?”
“Yes, I believe I do. It’s on the membership roster, right?”
He colored slightly. “Right. Call anytime.”
“Do you have to go?” The words flew out of Kellan’s mouth before the thought had even formed. It was important he not leave. Not yet.
Elizabeth agreed, wanting to do something for this young man who was nice enough to go out of his way for her.
“Yes, Gregory, you have to stay. It’s certainly close enough to dinnertime. I’ll order pizza and you and Kellan can go pick it up. I’ve got a salad in the refrigerator, and I’ll toast some garlic bread.” She rummaged in her purse for cash and then picked up the phone and began dialing.
“I didn’t come to eat,” he protested. He didn’t think this was a good idea, but he stopped abruptly when Kellan’s hand pressed his arm. That pulled him around to look at her, and his heart danced and skipped into a new rhythm.
“Maybe you didn’t, but you are now.” Her smile was welcome, and he suddenly felt himself relax in it. What could one meal matter?
He was pulling out of the driveway when she asked him where he lived and he told her. “I’ve never been to Fredericksburg,” she lied. “I’d love to see it.” Her lovely face looked expectant.
“Sure . . . we’ll have to plan on it,” he said vaguely, knowing it would never happen. “Elizabeth has mentioned that you’re at UVA?”
“Yes. I’ll have to go back tomorrow afternoon.” He pulled onto the highway and headed east. He could feel her eyes on him and was glad he had to keep his on the road.
“How do you know my mother, Gregory?” She wanted to know everything about him and more.
His hands clenched the steering wheel tightly and then he forced himself to relax. This is where it all hits the fan, he thought. He knew honesty would be his protection, but he was surprised as he tasted the hollowness of regret.
He told her everything, not holding anything back because he knew this was where it all ended. “Now you know more about me than my own mother.”
“Does my mother know?”
He nodded. “Only her and Adrienne Moore. And Dr. Meade. That’s it.”
She couldn’t speak for a moment; she felt honored.
They went in and got the pizza. Back in the car on the way home, Kellan was still tingling with brightness that he trusted her with this knowledge. But now she wanted to know everything about him.
He pulled the visor down to block the western sun, displaying a picture.
It was of an infant. “Is that your baby?
He shook his head. “Of course not. It’s my sister’s.”
“Oh.” She reached over and took it, feeling vastly relieved. “He’s adorable. How old?” She liked his smile.
“Six weeks. And both sides of the family are so excited, they can’t see him enough. Nancy and her husband hardly have time to be alone with him. His name is Jacob, but they’re calling him Jake.”
“That’s great.” He took the picture from her and tucked it back into the visor. “Your sister? Was she tested?”
He nodded. “But they’re not telling that around.”
Kellan nodded. “Does this mean—she can’t get ALS?”
Gregory shrugged. “She has the same chance as you, I guess.”
“Do they know what causes it?”
He shook his head.
“How to prevent it?”
Again, another shake.
“Well, since you have this . . . defective gene, does this mean you definitely will get it?”
“A better than average shot, I’d say.”
“Meaning a less than average shot you won’t get it?”
He shrugged.
“Are you doing anything alternatively for it? I mean, anecdotal stuff?”
“Not really. I work out, eat healthy, I’m insured to the hilt in case anything happens, and I try not to think about it.”
That all sounded reasonable, but she didn’t share his concerns for his future. “Research is exploding. I’m sure they’ll come up with something long before you need it.”
His lips tightened. “Yes, that’s what they told my uncle.”
“You’re not your uncle.”
He made no response.
She decided to change the subject—she wanted to know more about him, not his future possibilities. “Where do your parents live, Gregory?”
“Fairport. About ten miles from here, but it’s only my mom now. She and my father retired there about five years ago, on the Great Wicomico River. As soon as they moved here, he was diagnosed with a rare form of vascular disease that attacked his lungs. Within a month he was dead.”
“I’m sorry.” Kellan paused, absorbing all this. “How is your mother; is she doing all right?”
He shrugged. “She stays busy, she volunteers at the hospital. Now there’s the new baby, so Mom’s often up in Baltimore visiting them.”
“That must be hard, to retire and lose your husband,” Kellan said softly, thinking about her parents. They were both alive—yet in a way lost and apart. She started asking him about college and work.
She found it fascinating he had a dual degree in horticulture and business from Virginia Tech, and he, along with three partners, had created a booming business. Not only were they a full landscaping service for burgeoning planned communities, they also catered to the corporate communities, inside the buildings and outside on the surrounding grounds. The more he spoke, the more she was attracted.
They were nearing the driveway when she asked, “This rare form of vascular disease your father had—is it hereditary?”
She saw his quick look of surprise. “Um, well, I don’t know. I don’t think so.” He put the car in park and turned off the ignition.
“But you’re not sure,” she prodded. He shook his head, his face suddenly white.
“So you could possibly end up dying from that rather than ALS. Isn’t that possible?”
He didn’t answer for a long time, obviously stunned by what she had just asked. His thoughts were weaving into a tangle while his heart raced. Could what happened to his father happen to him? Would it?
He finally looked up. “God knows,” he murmured.
He almost jumped when he felt her hand on his arm while she waited for him to look at her. “My point exactly. Only God knows—so stop deciding your future when you only have this moment in which to live. You may get hit by a truck going home tonight—”
“Now that’s cheery thought,” he said with a weak grin.
“So don’t project into what may happen and what might be, because you’re going to lose the here and now—and that would be the real shame, the real loss. For everybody.” She watched as a myriad of emotions chased across his face and saw the moment he finally relaxed. She started to pull her hand away when his covered it. She swallowed hard.
“Have you ever thought about going into psychology?”
He watched her bright eyes sparkle, her lips start creasing into a mischievous smile. “As a matter of fact,” she drawled sweetly, waiting for his eyes to come back to hers before uttering a succinct, “No!”
They burst into laughter and it was healing and oddly bonding. A connection was being forged, whether or not it was wanted or desired.
“Let’s get this pizza in before it gets too cold,” she suggested and they were inside within minutes, where Elizabeth had set out the salad. Ice water and a bottle of red wine were also on the table along with garlic bread, which was giving off a mouth-watering aroma. It was a feast.
When they were finished, Gregory insisted on washing and Kellan insisted on drying. “I love a man who’s domestic,” she cooed, elbowing him at the sink.
“And I love a woman who is respectful of her elders,” he mocked, snapping a wet dishrag at her.
“Children, children,” Elizabeth murmured, smiling as she put the leftover salad away. Then she excused herself and went to watch the evening news.
“Do you want to take a walk on the beach?” Kellan suggested, putting away the last glass. She looked up, her eyes suddenly focused on his lips. They were strong and full. He was ringing out the wet dishrag and wasn’t looking at her. Kellan blinked. Get a grip, she admonished herself.
“It’ll have to be a short walk; I’ve got to get home,” he said, struggling to be casual. A nice short walk, maintaining a friendly banter would be all right. “Do you want to ask Elizabeth to join us?”
Kellan shot him a wry look. “In case you haven’t noticed, my mother doesn’t just take walks anymore.”
“Oh.” He felt like an idiot. He had completely forgotten, but it was hard to remember anything when her glances dissolved all his good intentions. “I guess you’re right.”
She led him through to the family room and told her mother what they were going to do. “It’s a beautiful evening; have a nice time,” she encouraged, smiling. “I’ll be going to bed soon, so if I don’t see you when you get back, Gregory, thank you again.”
“My pleasure, ma’am.”
The night was a canopy of black velvet, a perfect foil for the half-moon and a cascade of winking diamond stars. The moonlight draped an intimacy over the world. Kellan slipped her arm through his, the softness of the dark making her brave.
“Gregory?”
He stopped at the tension in her voice and she moved to face him. Moonlight framed her and he felt himself wanting, while trying hard to pull back. He took a deep breath and finally found his voice.
“Yes?”
“Do you have a girlfriend?” Kellan waited. She didn’t think he was involved, there were no subtle overtones that hinted he belonged to someone else, but she had to know.
He thought about lying, but somehow couldn’t bring himself to say the words. “Not anymore,” he finally said.
“What do you mean? What happened?” Because she was listening so carefully, she heard the pain so faint, so subtle he didn’t acknowledge it to himself.
“Last year I was engaged. Now I’m not.”
“What happened?” Her words were soft, hoping to gentle the answer from him.
“I told you. I’m defective.”
She caught her breath at the anger that ripped through her. “She broke up with you because of that?” Kellan was incredulous. What a shallow, worthless—the biting words and anger slammed to a halt and then veered into the opposite direction at his explanation.
“No, she didn’t break it off. I did. I told you, only three people, and now you, know. I never told her. I couldn’t let her marry into the kind of future I’m going to have.”
“What?” All the anger she had directed at the unknown fiancée was now aimed at him. “How dare you decide for her? How could you be so unfair?”
She heard the resignation. “I wasn’t unfair, Kellan. I know her. Believe me, if I had told her we certainly wouldn’t have gotten married. Melanie . . . is beautiful and wonderful, but she could never handle an illness like this. And I couldn’t allow her to make the choice anyway, so it’s moot.”
She grabbed both his arms and tried to shake him. “The choice wasn’t yours to make. You should have told her.”
“I disagree, but it doesn’t matter anymore. It’s the way I live my life now. No relationships.” Even he could hear the regret, but it didn’t matter.
“It’s not for you to decide.” Kellan was so adamant it puzzled him.
“Of course it is. It’s my life.”
“No, it’s not just your life. Not anymore,” she whispered with a certainty as strong as her arms growing around him, pulling his head down to hers.
Stunned, he felt her body imprinting his; startled arms reflexively wrapped around her waist and back and then he was participating in the sweetest, hottest kiss. Reality was suspended, like a balloon hovering.
Breathless and dazed, they finally broke apart, overwhelmed at the magic they had just created. Kellan felt her heart wrapped in a newly discovered joy, knowing there was no going back. Gregory felt his resistance draining and tried hard to keep it from slipping away entirely.
“Kellan,” he moaned, “you are probably making the biggest mistake of your life—”
“Our life,” she corrected, her mouth hovering over his. “And don’t you believe it.” Then their lips met again and again, as the music they were creating danced around them, their souls melding and soaring without boundaries, without limits.