I must start with a confession. Anyone who knows anything about either snowboarding or St Moritz will know that St Moritz does not have a halfpipe. And anyone who knows anything about competitive snowboarding will know that the FIS St Moritz event, whilst held in early December, is a ski event only. I try as much as possible to stick to ‘real life’ frameworks where I can but it’s not always possible, especially when trying to write a Christmas book which, by definition, is somewhat inflexible on dates!
I had a great time researching this book – first learning all about surfing, then switching to snow and learning about snowboarding. As a skier, it was all new for me, but the thrill of playing in alpine snow is the same. The very first seeds for this story were sown almost ten years ago when I saw a documentary film called The Crash Reel, based on the lead-up to, and fallout after, an accident suffered by snowboarder Kevin Pearce when he was training for the 2010 Winter Olympics. It was profoundly shocking and upsetting to watch although I’m glad to report Kevin recovered and, although he can no longer compete, has found fulfilment and success in lecturing about traumatic brain injuries and brain safety. The film made me realize, though, just how life-changing the risks can be when it goes wrong. This is a sport that looks like playing but the consequences of being one degree or one second out can easily be tragic.
Nonetheless, that was a long time ago and the film wasn’t on my ‘ideas’ radar until I happened to watch a couple of other documentaries in quick succession – playing in the background, usually whilst cooking dinner – on two fallen sporting heroes: Lance Armstrong and Oscar Pistorius. Although their fortunes have been affected by very different fates, I nonetheless was struck by the similarities between them: a ruthlessness, perfectionism, and a ready willingness to be unlikeable in the pursuit of being the best. Is that what’s required to be a winner? I was also intrigued by the idea of living with public disgrace, of being forever ‘the villain’.
Bringing all these ideas and themes together of course requires a mothership of over-achievers to make it look like I know what I’m doing. Luckily, I was beamed up by Pan Macmillan many moons ago and, as ever, I owe the team all my thanks – from the art department for this stunning new-look cover; to the editorial SWAT team Lucy Hale, Caroline Hogg and Jayne Osborne for their precision edits and the deep-dive brainstorms that found us such a lovely title; my desk editor Samantha Fletcher and copy editor Camilla Lockwood for keeping the faith with all the randomness that accompanies the early drafts – sometimes they laugh, sometimes they cry; Jez Trevathan, Stu Dwyer, Jonathan Atkins, Charlotte Williams, Elle Gibbons, Hannah Corbett, Jade Tolley, Rebecca Lloyd . . . Absolutely everyone places their own mark on this book’s progress and I’m so grateful for all of it. To misquote the Instagram phrase – the book did not wake up like this.
As for my family, who have to live with me while I’m muddling through my tangled, knotted thoughts and trying to fashion a story . . . thank you for always repeating every three times for me and not leaving home when I haven’t got time to restock the fridge. There’s no me without you. You are utterly glorious.