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Timberly
He pulls me into him tighter as I scan the area around me I start feeling a small wash of panic rising, with a single look from his sea green eyes quells the fear right away. God knows what that drink was he gave me, but I like it. The smooth liquid slides down and pools in the pit of my stomach the taste left tingling the tip of my tongue. Looking into his eyes as he talks to me I cut him off, “-can I have another please” a small stutter escaping me pulling my hands up to my mouth, he smiles at me with just his eyes.
Flicking his fingers, a young lady brings him over one with an ear beaming grin over her face, a small pang of something shoots up my core, not knowing all these strange new feelings I just look around this place, his life, these people, it's overwhelming. Pulling his hand tight into mine the shakes start as the lady he spoke too early comes stalking towards us with a stunning blonde in tow. And she has the saddest eyes I’ve ever seen, apart from my own. they seem to mirror mine. Glass blue yet dark around the edges.
Ghost pushes his lips to my forehead in that moment, obstructing my view of not only the ladies starring me down but the men also. “Poppet, Lilly here will take you to her room to shower and change, I have church” he says into my hair, strange feelings wash over me as his breath graces over my skin, pulling my lips up into a nervous smile, shaking all I do is nod turning my cheek into his hand as it rests on my cheek.
“It's ok poppet it won’t take long” he says moving from my side as the blonde girl with the sad eyes comes up to me, pulling my hand into hers, I go to pull free, but her grip is fierce
“I'm Lilly the princess of the great Reapers Reign” she says it with a kick to her lip and a spark to her eyes sass lacing her voice, Ghost kisses her forehead.
“That you are Lil” winking at me I watch him walk with the other six men into the room with the Smokey glass walls, with a massive skull with wings on the door reading “Reapers Reign New York 1% MC
Pulling at my arm Lilly pulls me from the stool my stomach growls and I stumble as we head up the stairs of this massive place. My mind swims as I look around door upon door, room upon room.
I can still feel the eyes of the women on me and the whistles of the men. Shaking I try to wrap my free arm around my body as I see the tell-tale black dots forming at the edges of my eyes.
“Don’t you worry about them, Tim, can I call you that?” she asks like I have a choice in it, she calms me when she talks squeezing my hand as she pushes us through the door at the far end of the long hallway. Gasping at the sight before me a massive room it's all windows with a massive deck out the front of it, just hanging their midair above the world below you can see the lights twinkling around and the stars looking up I can see the stars through the massive glass cutouts in the roof. “It’s pretty neat ae Tim? “Lilly asks me, waiting for my answer she giggles, “It's, ok Tim I know you don’t like to talk and I know about the dark also, it’s ok babes, I feel ya”
looking at her shocked swallowing down the spit I feel sitting heavy in my mouth, “Oh, ok then” I say back.
She disappears then behind a long tin wall that is covered in photos, quotes, and pictures. “Tim it’ll be good to have another girl around here you know” I hear her bumping and crashing chatting to me like she’s known me forever,
“Oh I'm not staying” I stutter out “Well at least I think I'm not, nerves rearing up in my belly. My eye catches movement to the side just as she walks out with clothing in her hands
“Here you go, through there is the bathroom.” Pointing to the black door, picking up the clothes I head to change it will be nice to peel these scummy clothes from my body but ’'ll put the hoodie back on after it smells like Ghost and keeps me calm.
I hear as I'm looking around at the room that’s bigger than my bedroom, “Yup” I squeak out.
Lilly giggles at the sound that comes out, “Feel free to shower and warm up I’ll get some food for us” looking around nervously
“Sure,” I say not sure what to do,
“You want anything Tim,” she says through the door, thinking over what she just said
“Oh yes can I have another drink like before” I hear her laughing
“Sure, Ghost will love that” I listen to her steps as she leaves the room fifteen steps it takes to get from the bathroom to the door, it took twenty-five from bar to the top of the stairs and then another twenty down the hallway to the room. That’s sixty steps in total and the ones from the bar to the bike well that was fifty-five so in total, I will have to take one hundred and fifteen steps to where she lays in that black van the life I knew gone what to do now? Turning the shower to hot I pull the clothing from my body and drop them into the bin next to toilet and I hang Ghost’s Hoodie and jacket up on the hook on the door, stepping into the stream of water gasping out as it hits my skin running my hands over my arms and sides as the tingles hit them my body burns from where the water hits the scraps, cuts, grazes and bruises the blisters on my feet hurt liftin a foot up at a time the water runs down over them stinging sucking in a deep breath.
Tilting my head back running my fingers through my hair picking up the shampoo running it under my nose I relish in the sweet smell of mandarins and vanilla. Bubbling it up through my hair washing it free I lather up the body puff and rub the sweet smelling of iris, “Mmmm,” leaves my lips as I sink down and let the water just caresses my soul, washing away the day’s activities, getting lost in my thoughts I'm startled by the sound of knocking and Lilly’s sweet-sounding voice. “Tim, you ok in there,” she says concern in her voice, the tell-tale red washes over me as shame comes creeping in, “Um yes,” I croak out, “I'm sorry, I'm coming.”
“Hell girl, take ya time.”
Twelve steps till she stops, twelve plus the one-hundred and fifty five is one hundred and sixty seven steps running that number through my head it calms me along with my heart rate as I dress in the clothing that she has given me, pulling Ghost’s hoodie over me, opening the door I see her sitting on the couch overlooking the world below wrapped up in a blanket that looks like a fluffy cloud. “Hey, Tim,” she says to me before I even get to where she is, “food here and the Jager” pointing she looks up at me with her eyes that mirror mine.
“Thank you” picking up the drink as I tuck my feet under my bum as I sit the sweats and t-shirt paired with Ghost’s hoodie is swimming on my tiny frame, picking at the hem of the shirt with my free hand, I'm a nervous mess I feel the bubble rising up in me.
“What’s ya story Tim” Lilly asks with actual want in her voice.
“I um, I don’t have one, “I answer unsure of what I should say,
“We all have a story Tim” reaching over the plate she pops a small quiche into her mouth, the smell has my mouth watery and my stomach growling, it’s been days shit even a week since I have eaten anything. Passing me the plate I pick one up and nibble it as she settles in bringing her bottle of drink up to her lips, looking at the label she sees me, “This here is Jack he’s the only boyfriend I'll have, we have an understanding him and I, he makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and I love the way he slides down my throat” winking at me she laughs I giggle with her not really knowing what else to do, I’ve only ever had Red to talk with.
“Timberly, it's ok” nodding my head, my shoulders relaxing an inch as I watch her pick up a remote pushing a few buttons and music fills the room, soothing my soul instantly. “Trust may be hard for you Tim, believe me, I know, you and I are alike I can sense it in many ways, I don’t know much, Ghost has said a few things to me on nights like this just chilling he was fucked up when he realized you were gone, so believe me when I say you can trust me” I get the feeling of pure ease with her, and when she patted my knee I felt just kindness and love coming from her soul, you know I’ve never meet a person that mirrors me on the inside and outside the person I want to be and feel I see in her, in this stranger. Can I imagine opening up to her and allowing her in, I feel she wouldn’t hurt me and maybe just understand, can I have a friend? Lilly reaches out and squeezes my hand, I smile up at her politely bringing my attention to the view over her shoulder, a wall filled of pictures and little lights lighting up a big blown up picture of a lady that looks so strikingly similar to Lilly, standing I walk over looking into her eyes, I’ve seen this woman before I know her I do, I'm sure of it.
Running my fingers over the images eyes, nose and mouth, I sense Lilly behind me, “This beauty here is my momma, she was my world” I sense sadness in her voice this other babe is Blue she’s my bestie, my soul sister. I look at her I see the sadness in her eyes and the tears that are pooling in her them, bringing my fingers up to mine to make sure it’s not my image I see in them and it’s not my eyes caving under the strain of pain buried deep. It’s not though I reach out catching one as it rolls down her cheek, “Don’t cry Lilly” not knowing what to do this is all so new to me so I do what I see people do all the time and thats pull them in for a hug, I start to count the beats of my heart to quell the panic of reaching out to someone 1,2,3,4 arms out pulling her in 5,6,7,8 “ Ssshhh” I say into her hair, 9,10,11,12 I run my palm down her back as she weeps in my embrace, for what seems like an eternity just us standing there held still in time, her tears mixed with my counting of both of our broken heart beats.
A soothing melody.
Pulling free we head to the couch her hands wrapped around mine pulling me down she fans out the blanket around us picking up our drinks Lilly settles in and tells me the story of the night she lost her mom.