Riverdish

If you’ve ever listened to an episode of Riverdish, you know that it is no secret that Ryan’s favorite character on Riverdale is Nana Rose. From the very first time she rolled her wheelchair into frame, he was obsessed, and a new icon was born.

Roseanne “Rose” Blossom is Clifford and Claudius Blossom’s mother and Jason and Cheryl’s grandmother. The red streak through her snow-white hair seems to hold more secrets and stories than all the residents of Riverdale combined. Unfortunately, very little is actually known about the early years of Rose Blossom’s life.

We would be very into seeing an entire spin-off devoted to exploring Nana Rose’s younger days! She herself spent time as a daughter in one of the most important families in Riverdale. What if she had an affair with the Riverdale Reaper (aka Louis Cooper, Betty’s grandfather) back in her day? This could potentially explain why she was so sympathetic to the plight of Jason and Polly! All we are saying is, there is a lot of potential here, and we are very much on board to be in the writers’ room.

We first met her on the day of Jason Blossom’s memorial service at Thornhill. While digging through Jason’s bedroom, hungry for any clues that could help uncover Jason’s killer, Betty and Jughead were cornered by Nana Rose. Mistaking Betty for Polly, Nana Rose started speaking of a family heirloom ring that she had given Polly. It turns out that Polly and Jason were secretly engaged to be married with the approval of Nana Rose. She not only shared this but also confessed that Great-grandfather Blossom had murdered Great-grandfather Cooper over a dispute regarding their shared maple syrup business.

We suppose now would be a great time to mention that Nana Rose holds some sort of mystical power. Because of course she does! At Polly Cooper’s baby shower, Nana Rose performed a ritual on Polly that revealed she was pregnant with twins, a boy and a girl. It was Cheryl who remarked that along with dementia, Nana Rose has Gypsy blood in her.

Yes, we realize that it is a bit silly to keep a crime file on a lady who can barely get to her own breakfast cereal, let alone commit a crime. But we feel it is important to keep a file on her in case she goes missing. Some of the most harrowing months of our lives were those between season one and season two, when we thought that Nana Rose had potentially been killed in the fire that Cheryl set at Thornhill. We must keep Nana Rose alive at all costs! Who knows . . . she may very well be in cahoots with the Gargoyle King.