The way you speak to yourself matters, especially since it’s so easy to be your own worst critic. It influences how you feel about yourself, and your life. First, notice the ongoing dialogue happening in your mind, or any negative thoughts you’re having about yourself. Next, practice positive self-talk. For example, if you make a mistake, your initial thought might be, “That was stupid.” Try to add more context and positivity to the reaction: “…but mistakes happen and I’ll handle it differently next time.” You’re only human, after all! Practice talking to yourself the way you would a best friend: with plenty of kindness and understanding. Why should you deserve any less? Over time, self-kindness will feel more automatic, and you’ll notice how much happier you feel.
Knowing when and how to ask for help may seem like a weakness, but it’s actually a strength. After all, everyone encounters difficult situations now and then, and an extra helping hand can make all the difference. Since reaching out for support can feel hard at first, start with something small: Delegate part of a project to a peer or coworker, or ask your partner to help with a chore at home. Then, move up to the bigger things: seeing if an acquaintance will promote your new business, or confiding in a close friend on a difficult day. As you lighten your load or vent about something upsetting, you’ll feel the positive effects on your overall happiness—and wonder why you avoided asking for help before.
Sometimes things are not within our control—and that’s okay! In these instances, a higher power can help lead the way. You just have to ask. First, think about what you want—get specific! Then, write it down, say it out loud, or visualize it as part of your “ask.” In this practice, you are manifesting the happiness you want by putting your desires out into the universe, and opening yourself up to whatever comes back.
Letting your mind wander—on your dream job, an innovative idea, or future vacation—leads to more creativity and happiness. In fact, it can actually improve productivity, counter to what teachers may have told you! Take some time to sit back and enjoy wherever your thoughts take you.
Streamlining small, often repetitive tasks creates valuable space in your day for the things you really enjoy. Consider ordering groceries online, setting up auto-responses for emails, or using media services that consolidate information straight to your fingertips. Then, take a breath and devote that extra time to an activity that makes you happy.