“THIRTEEN MONTHS?” I blurted. “That’s impossible.”
The doctors shook their heads.
“We’ve spent a lot of time together, Danny Boy,” said Nurse O’Hara. “I strung twinkling lights in the window and hung ornaments off your IV pole, hoping the visual stimulation might…”
“No,” I said, sitting up in my bed. “This is crazy.…”
I saw Dr. Oz bury his hand into the hip pocket of his lab coat and fiddle with something. None of the doctors were smiling anymore.
“Look, I appreciate everything you’ve done for me. But if I’ve been stuck in here for thirteen months because of that little fender bender out on the highway, that means I’m way behind schedule.”
Okay. I was starting to panic. Supercharged adrenaline was pumping through my veins. The steady beep-beep-beep on the heart monitor picked up its pace. If I had been out of operation for over a year, that meant Number 1 and all the other alien outlaws roaming around Terra Firma had basically been enjoying a free ride, with no Alien Hunter to slow them down. I couldn’t even imagine what kind of dirty deeds my nemeses had been up to in my absence, and as you know, I have a very vivid imagination.
I decided I didn’t have a choice.
I needed to get out of this hospital as quickly as I could and resume my duties as the planet’s protector.
So I did what had to be done.
I had to confess who I really was and what I could really do.
“Okay,” I said, “this is going to sound extremely strange. You might even think I’m a little insane. But hear me out.”
Every medical professional in the room was staring at me like I was nuts.
“I’m an alien.”
Okay. Now they were staring at me like I was loonier than a tune.
“Excuse me?” said Dr. Oz.
“I came to Earth from Alpar Nok.”
“And where, or what, is that?”
“It’s a planet. In a galaxy far, far away.”
“Like in Star Wars?”
“Exactly!” Good. They understood. “I came here to protect your planet from other, evil aliens and—well, not to brag, I have incredible powers.”
“Like Superman?” said Dr. Gupta. “I believe he came to Earth from a distant planet as well.”
“True, but Superman’s just a comic book, Doc. I can actually do things.”
Dr. Gupta arched an eyebrow. “Really? And what exactly can you do, Daniel?”
“Lots of stuff. Okay, your stethoscope? I can turn it into anything you want.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. I can rearrange matter at the atomic level.”
“Well, Danny Boy, I’d like a diamond necklace,” said Nurse O’Hara, tapping her stethoscope. Her smile had slipped into a sarcastic grin. “From Tiffany’s.”
“Fine.”
Hey, if I had to perform a few quick parlor tricks to earn my ticket out of this place, I was game.
I concentrated on the shiny knob at the end of Nurse O’Hara’s stethoscope. I figured I’d turn it into the Hope Diamond. That’s a 45.52 carat deep-blue gemstone, housed in the Smithsonian, that some say is worth a quarter of a billion dollars. A little over the top? Sure. But I needed to prove my point, fast.
I focused hard. I even squinted.
But nothing happened.
Nurse O’Hara tsked her tongue.
Fine. If these people wouldn’t let me out of the hospital, I’d teleport myself out of the place. I’d zoom off to London, maybe Paris, or Tokyo.
Only that didn’t work, either.
Dr. Oz took a step toward the bed. “Daniel…”
I shot up my hand and stretched out my fingers.
“Don’t come any closer, sir. I’ve just put up a pulsating electromagnetic force field.”
“Is that so?” He took another step. Nothing happened.
I was definitely starting to freak. Something was seriously wrong. Had all my powers seeped away while I was out for the coma count?
“Wait,” I sputtered. “I’ve been lying in this bed too long. My powers have atrophied…. Weakened. But they’ll come back. You’ll see. Tomorrow. Maybe the next day. I’m not really sure because I’ve never experienced a total power drain before. Usually, there’s a residual…”
Two burly orderlies the size of linebackers barged into the room.
Dr. Oz nodded toward my bed.
“Young Daniel here needs his rest.”
Remember how the doctor had reached into his pocket? I’m guessing that’s when he’d summoned the security goons.
“No, wait,” I said to the two no-neck body builders. “I’m warning you.…”
The big men lunged toward my bed.
I had no choice. I didn’t want to hurt the muscle-bound bedpan boys, but when I’m attacked I instinctively fight back.
The two men pinned me down.
Dr. Oz jabbed a hypodermic into my thigh.
I yelled out once.
Then I swirled down a rabbit hole of darkness.