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They toed a line while he was deployed. Flirting. Dirty-Talk. Mutual self-gratification. Nothing was off limits. Now he’s back, and these best friends have to figure out where they stand.
Riley falls hard and fast for the guys she dates, and it never ends with the wedding bells she expects. Tired of the heartbreak and unsure she even knows what love is, she swears off unreliable things like dating and trying to find that elusive happily-ever-after spark.
Which is great, except she misses the physical part of being half a couple. Fortunately, now her best friend, Zane, is back from his military deployment, he offers to tie her up in the bedroom with no expectations.
Zane’s holding something back, and Riley sees how much the secret haunts him. If she can’t help him overcome his demons, their friendship and their no-strings playtime may not survive.
For my eternal dragon
Chapter Zero
Five years ago
CharcoalDreams: What’s with the new screen name?
InvaderZ: Apparently The Taurus made a couple of HS watch lists—got to be too much of a hassle to mask myself. Fucking Air Force firewalls.
CharcoalDreams: First computer when you were five, hacking since you were seven, and in the fifteen years since then, you’ve never backed down from a network security challenge. You don’t mean high school, do you?
InvaderZ: Homeland Security.
CharcoalDreams: Of course :-P InvaderZ-do you pronounce it like the video game?
InvaderZ: You pronounce it like Invader Zee—two words.
CharcoalDreams: :-D Right, cuz Z for Zane, I get it. So what are you up to?
InvaderZ: You really want to know?
CharcoalDreams: I asked, didn’t I?
InvaderZ: Yeah, but this is different.
CharcoalDreams: ??? I thought we could tell each other anything.
InvaderZ: Yeah, but this is different.
CharcoalDreams: Not funny. You could have just said nothing and I would have dropped it. But you had to make it sound interesting.
InvaderZ: Fine. I was considering jerking off.
CharcoalDreams:...
InvaderZ: Told you that you didn’t want to hear it.
CharcoalDreams: You caught me off guard is all. I mean I figure, you being all my girlfriend left me and I’ll never sleep with another woman again that you were getting off somehow. I just didn’t put a lot of thought into it.
InvaderZ: Now I feel awkward.
CharcoalDreams: You shouldn’t have brought it up then.
InvaderZ: You’ve never put any thought into it, but I’m picturing you naked all the time.
CharcoalDreams: :-O You are not.
InvaderZ: Well, not all the time. But you’ve made an appearance in the mental rotation. Just because you’re my best friend doesn’t mean I’ve never noticed how drop-dead sexy you look in cutoffs. Or a bikini. Or one of my T-shirts and nothing else. Wait, that one was all in my head.
CharcoalDreams: Do you know this is getting awkward?
InvaderZ: You started it.
CharcoalDreams: I did not.
InvaderZ: Whatever. Forget I mentioned it.
CharcoalDreams: Do I ever start it in these fantasies of yours?
InvaderZ: I thought you wanted to drop it.
CharcoalDreams: Now you have me thinking about it.
InvaderZ: Sometimes.
CharcoalDreams: Sometimes...I start it?
InvaderZ: Yup. Sometimes I ask you, sometimes you ask me, we screw, it’s all good.
CharcoalDreams: That’s it.
InvaderZ: What?
CharcoalDreams: We screw, it’s all good. That’s about the weakest fantasy I’ve ever heard.
InvaderZ: So, no offense, Riley. But I’m a guy. If I can imagine myself sticking my dick in something warm and attractive, I don’t need a lot more.
CharcoalDreams: So crude.
InvaderZ: At least I let you make an appearance. You never even think about me.
CharcoalDreams: If I did, it’d be a much more elaborate fantasy. You at least deserve that.
InvaderZ: Like what?
CharcoalDreams: I don’t know, but it needs build-up, and tension, and fun, and intimacy.
InvaderZ: You do too know.
CharcoalDreams: Excuse me?
InvaderZ: You wouldn’t have said it if you didn’t have an idea. You’ve obviously created these elaborate fantasies before. Would it destroy you to write me into one?
CharcoalDreams:...
InvaderZ: ?
CharcoalDreams: Since that’s pretty much what my brain has been doing since you brought it up I’m going to say it wouldn’t destroy me at all.
InvaderZ: Are you complaining?
CharcoalDreams: I guess it all depends on how good my imagination thinks you are in the sack.
InvaderZ: Just don’t make it too impossible a dream to live up to.
CharcoalDreams: You’re thousands of miles away and will be for at least the next five years. When are you going to get a chance to live up to it? Besides, I’d never let it screw up our friendship, and you’ve already sworn you’re going to be celibate for the rest of your life.
InvaderZ: In that case, make sure I’m absolutely fantastic. And describe it to me in vivid detail.
CharcoalDreams: I thought you didn’t need an elaborate fantasy, just a mental image of something...what was it ~scrolls up~ warm and attractive?
InvaderZ: Just because I don’t need it doesn’t mean I don’t like the idea. Teach me the error of my ways, oh wise one. Tell me how imaginary me is going to make you scream my name in ecstasy.
CharcoalDreams: I don’t know, um...You come over to watch movies.
InvaderZ: And that’s sexy?
CharcoalDreams: And that’s how it starts. The first hint of sexy is that you’re wearing a battered T-shirt that’s just the right amount of soft, that smells like you, and ripped jeans. And we’re probably drinking a little, not enough to get drunk, just a beer each or something, and you’re letting me curl up against you on the couch like we did back in high school.
InvaderZ: But you’ve never thought about this before. And then we screw?
CharcoalDreams: Eventually. Give it time.
InvaderZ: Sorry. But tonight would be nice.
CharcoalDreams: :-P And since we’re watching cable—HBO or Showtime or something—and it’s late, some stupid, R-rated fake porn movie comes on.
InvaderZ: I hate those things.
CharcoalDreams: I know. Anyway, we start joking about how ridiculously censored they are, and even pretending to act out certain scenes, and all the sudden, you’ve got me on my stomach, straddling me, arms pinned behind my back.
InvaderZ: Nice. Actually really, really hot. I should warn you, if you keep going, I’m going to jerk off.
CharcoalDreams: I didn’t need to know that.
InvaderZ: Why not? I’d want to know if you were.
CharcoalDreams:...I was thinking about it.
InvaderZ: Wait, really?
CharcoalDreams: ~blush~ seriously.
InvaderZ: Because I’d much rather hear about that.
CharcoalDreams: What do you want to know?
InvaderZ: God damn it, why can’t my bandwidth support video?
CharcoalDreams: I guess you’ll have to use your imagination. Say you could watch, what would you want to see?
InvaderZ: What are you wearing?
CharcoalDreams: Cliché, but I’ll bite. T-shirt and jeans.
InvaderZ: You’re not even trying. Take your shirt off.
CharcoalDreams: Mmm...bossy. I like it.
InvaderZ: I’ll keep that in mind.
CharcoalDreams: Shirt’s off. Now I’m topless except for this red lace bra that’s probably a half-cup too small, so my boobs are kind of...pushing to get out.
InvaderZ: Better. You should oblige at least one of them. I’ve always wondered what your tits looked like.
CharcoalDreams: You know, round, fun to play with, and right now with very swollen, pink nipples.
InvaderZ: Since I can’t be there to do it myself, you should play with them. Pinch your nipples, roll them between your fingers. Make yourself moan.
CharcoalDreams: ~moans~ do you want me to lick one, too?
InvaderZ: You can do that? Fuck yes.
CharcoalDreams: Too bad I don’t have anything else here to use my tongue on.
InvaderZ: I’m so hard right now. Are you getting wet?
CharcoalDreams: ~squirms in seat~ Presumably.
InvaderZ: You should probably lose your jeans so you can do a hands-on test.
CharcoalDreams: Is that an order?
InvaderZ: Yes.
CharcoalDreams: I like this a lot. So now you have me stripped down to my lacy things, and two fingers sliding easily between my legs confirms that, yes, you’ve got me very wet.
InvaderZ: Incredible. Do you still have that vibrator?
CharcoalDreams: How do you know about that?
InvaderZ: I’d say lucky guess, but you don’t always tuck it away as well as you think you do. Grab it.
CharcoalDreams: Yes, Sir.
InvaderZ: In this fantasy of yours, I get to pin your arms behind your back, strip away your clothes, and have my way with you, right?
CharcoalDreams: ~eep~ something like that. Okay, pretty much exactly like that.
InvaderZ: Keep that in mind as you turn that toy on and slide it slowly inside you. Imagine that’s me. That first slow penetration. The slow build-up.
CharcoalDreams: Um, wow, okay. This is better than any fantasy I’ve ever come up with. Are you taking your time, almost pulling out of me before pushing back inside again?
InvaderZ: I am, but I don’t know how long I can be patient.
CharcoalDreams: So make me come. Slam into me hard and fast while you hold me in place. Listen to me get louder with each thrust.
InvaderZ: Fuck. I’m stroking myself really fast now.
CharcoalDreams: I’m moving my vibrator higher, pressing it against my clit. This feels so incredible. It should be you instead, sliding along my slit, listening to me moan...
InvaderZ:
CharcoalDreams:
InvaderZ:
CharcoalDreams:
InvaderZ:
CharcoalDreams: ~laughs~ Wow. I just came really hard.
InvaderZ: Holy fuck, that was incredible.
CharcoalDreams: Mmm...definitely. And I owe you an apology.
InvaderZ: Oh?
CharcoalDreams: I should have let you into my fantasies a long time ago.
InvaderZ: Nice. This doesn’t get awkward now, does it?
CharcoalDreams: Only if you tell me we can’t ever do it again ;-)
InvaderZ: Right. Who else is going to keep my hand and brain well lubricated for the next couple years?
CharcoalDreams: You say the sweetest things.
InvaderZ: Riley?
CharcoalDreams: Hmm?
InvaderZ: Thank you.
CharcoalDreams: ~Blush~
InvaderZ: I have to bolt. I’ll message you next time I have a connection.
CharcoalDreams: I’ll be here.