Of all the images she expected, it certainly wasn’t this. This was why he had asked about the accident yesterday. It was the strangest feeling and yet his presence in her mind was not invasive. He did as promised and showed her images only. Tears erupted in her eyes and rained unchecked down her cheeks. She scooted to the far end of the couch, curling up into herself, once again hugging the pillow to her chest. Her sorrow, she knew, leaked in waves from her body, convulsing into heart-wrenching sobs she didn’t seem to have any control over.
Gregori reached out to her. She backed up as far as she could and when that wasn’t far enough, she shot from the seat like a dark voluminous eruption from a volcano and placed herself in the doorway to her bedroom. He’d promised not to enter her room. She would be safe there.
“It was you,” she whimpered.
His anguish was written in his features. There was a great sadness in his eyes. He paced towards her, stopping scarcely an inch away from her. She forced herself to remain where she was, determined not to be bowed by this revelation when she had so much more to reveal than he.
“I didn’t cause the accident.” He towered over her. “It’s imperative you believe me.”
“It’s imperative you keep your distance,” she managed between shuddering sobs.
He went silent and waited, like an avenging dragon whose wings had been broken and could no longer fly. She felt his pain along their connection. He spoke the truth, but the shock, the emotions she’d repressed for so long, the images of that time when her life had changed so dramatically came rushing back, breaking through the barriers she’d erected to keep her from remembering. Could she forgive him for that, when she’d been so successful in ignoring the truth for so long?
“The bells tolled for you when I was fourteen,” she rubbed away the tears from her eyes with the back of her hand. “How can you still be here, alive, with magic?”
“Marylebone ensorcelled me.”
It all made sense now. “Until I was old enough to bind with you?”
Gregori nodded. “Yes. Otherwise I would have had to sacrifice everything. I’m born immortal. Not made. The consequences of ignoring the bells are far greater for someone like me. I’m old. Very old. With so much power at my fingertips, to deny the bells would ultimately spell disaster for everyone and to sacrifice all the knowledge I possess drove them to desperation. Marylebone did not want to lose that knowledge so they risked ensorcelling me. Against my will, I might add. I was intent on searching for the cause of your parents’ death and I was doing so when they entrapped me. If you don’t believe me, ask Zelda. She knows.”
His image blurred as new tears filled her eyes. “Zelda!” Alanna felt the blood drain from her cheeks. She shook her head from side to side, her eyes closed, her mouth twisted in pain. “All this time,” she murmured to herself. “She’s known all this time and said nothing.”
Her knees buckled. She slid to the floor.
Gregori bent down and picked her up. “I’m sorry. Much of what happened has been outside my control. It came a as a huge shock when the Fates tolled the bells for me. I am a toy to them, as they play some game I don’t understand.”
He took her back to the couch and sat her down. “You’re in shock.” He picked up her wine, waved a hand over it and handed it to her. “Drink a little of this. It will calm you.”
Alanna flung the glass back at him, the dark red merlot spilling down and staining his shirt, the crystal goblet smashing into pieces on the floor. “No! You already enchanted me earlier. No more spells. I need a clear head. I need to know my thoughts are not clouded with drugs of any kind.”
“It was but a mere herbal to calm you.”
“I’m sorry about your glass,” she whispered. “I know it was valuable.”
He was bewildered by her response. “Glass is replaceable. You are not. It is you I’m concerned for.”
“You don’t need to be.”
Gregori wanted her to forgive him. Which was laughable. Not only did she need his forgiveness, but his acceptance. His secret was not so dark when hers was even greater.
She brought her knees up to her chest and clasped her hands about them. Leaning forward she pressed her mouth against the material of her jeans, afraid she would blurt it out. She was afraid he would leave her, when she wanted him to stay. She was afraid her heart would break all over again.