Frek was here and I was an absolute mess. My body ached like it had been beaten repeatedly. I was cycling between hot flashes and chills, and every time I saw myself in the mirror, a stranger stared back at me. My pale pasty skin made my red puffy eyes with the dark smudges around them from crying look like the eyes of some frightening beast, and my lips looked red and abused from how much I’d chewed on them.
I could barely stand to wear clothes. My markings not only throbbed, but were now so sensitive I couldn’t stand to have anything against them, especially underwear. I hadn’t been able to for the last four days. My nipples were in a permanent state of attention, the sharp little peaks rubbing against my clothes painfully.
After I tracked down Arik and told him what was happening and asked him to organise for the Fallen Star to be allowed entrance to our solar system and planet, I locked myself in my suite. I had avoided my family for the last week. Food was delivered, but by the fourth day I had barely any appetite and eating made me feel ill.
Every one of my family had knocked on my door at some stage—those who still lived in the palace, anyway. Arik tried to get me to open the door for him at least twice a day, and the last time he’d tried, he’d begged me to let him in.
He was my favourite brother. He was the one I’d run to when I was hurt as a child, not my mama or papa, who were busy with running a planet and raising my three younger siblings. Arik was fifteen when I was born, and he was the one who heard my first word and watched me take my first steps.
Why he wasn’t married with his own children was a mystery to all of us, but he insisted he wasn’t ready to settle down yet. I had a feeling there was more going on—like the fact that he had never needed to be initiated like a Borakoy male, so a lot of families didn’t believe he was fertile. One family who had considered him for their daughter had asked for a fertility test to be completed, but he’d refused. And the other thing that led me to believe there was more going on was that I’d seen him whispering in the ear of one of the male servants one time, and it had looked far from innocent.
I couldn’t care less if he preferred males. He was my brother and I loved him, and it hurt my heart to have to keep him at arm’s length, but if he saw me, he would know instantly something was wrong, and he’d have me in medical faster than I’d be able to say I’m fine.
But the day Frek was to arrive... had arrived, I had to pull myself together and go down and meet him. I had to be near my father, who, like Arik, would know instantly that something was wrong, but worse, he would know exactly what was wrong with me.
I chose my outfit with care, trying to pick something that was loose enough not to rub against my sensitive skin while also looking appropriate. I couldn’t very well turn up in a nightgown, which is what I’d pretty much lived in since day four of the torture.
A simple day dress in a bright turquoise ended up being my choice. No panties as my mama liked to call them, but I did put on a breast shield in the hopes of disguising my erect nipples. The dress was gathered at the waist and fell in soft folds of silky fabric to my ankles. The bodice was loose and formed a soft cowl at the front with a wide neckline and soft flowing sleeves to cover the scars on my arms. I completed my outfit with a pair of gold strappy sandals with a flat heel.
With my hair tied back in a holder and a small amount of makeup disguising my too-pale skin, I made my way to the receiving room. Arik had told me that morning Frek was due to arrive at three after noon. I had fifteen minutes to get down to the receiving room.
Smaller and less formal than the throne room, which doubled as a ballroom when needed, the receiving room was where Papa and Mama accepted most of their visitors. The palace was teeming with staff all rushing about preparing for not only the arrival of Frek, but the arrival of the King of Alloria the following day and the ball my mother and I had been planning ever since Frek’s father requested permission to visit.
My entire family who still lived in the palace were gathered in the receiving room, along with a handful of guards, when I entered through the private door near the dais. Papa was standing in front of his richly upholstered royal seat talking to Arik and Alkeshar, my second oldest brother and the heir to our throne. Mama was sitting on her slightly smaller seat next to Papa’s with my younger sister Alvinia talking to her animatedly.
My other brothers, Altair, Alvar, and the youngest, Alwyn, who was only twelve, were sitting on one of the padded benches that ran down the length of the room on either side of the wide carpeted central aisle. I made my way over to the windows that ran down the length of the room and looked out over the gardens. They were my mother’s pride and joy. She drove the gardeners crazy with her need to always be out in them tinkering.
I wanted to hide behind the rich red drapes that hung around each of the windows. My body was clamouring with need, turning my stomach into a tense painful ball. Every part of me felt like it was primed and on the edge of release, and it had been that way since my conversation with Frek.
The need to come was excruciating, but no matter how many times I’d stroked myself to release in the last six days, I found no relief from the Craving, and I wouldn’t find any relief until a male came inside me. The hormones in their semen gave relief from the symptoms for short periods of time, but until I was pregnant, the Craving would not leave entirely.
A small noise drew my attention to the double doors at the end of the room. They were thrown open by two guards, and Bartelnar, the Lord Steward, strode into the room followed by a group of males and one female. My family converged on the royal seats, and we spread out in a fan on either side, males on Papa’s side and females on Mama’s in our order of birth, which put me next to my mother and far too close to my father for comfort.
I took all our visitors in at a glance before my gaze landed on Frek. My core spasmed so hard, my stomach twisting with vicious need, that I almost dropped to the floor. I couldn’t control the small noise that escaped me though, and received a hard stare from my father before he turned back to our guests. My legs started to tremble and tears stung my eyes as I tried not to gasp.
Bartelnar led them up the aisle until they were a few feet from the dais and they spread out in a line behind him. Nine people of all different species stood in front of us. This time I looked them over a little more thoroughly, ripping my focus away from Frek in an attempt to calm the Craving. They looked... rough, dangerous. Each male had an air of aggression swirling around him, and the female, although not much taller than me and curvy in a lush way like I was, seemed just as dangerous.
They were not wearing court-appropriate clothing, but rather clothing more suited to people who worked for a living—serviceable, sturdy and in dark colours to hide the dirt.
Trying to ignore the pain inside me, I listened as the Lord Steward started to introduce them. Frek stepped forward first. He was the shortest male among them, but he’d still be taller than my five foot four.
“The Crown Prince of Alloria, Frek Nar Ortalon.”
Bartelnar then swept his hand out towards my parents in a grand gesture. “The Emperor and Empress of Borakoy, Alkendar and Sasha Sarnektor.”
Frek gave a graceful, well-practiced bow and said, “Your Majesties, I thank you for your hospitality and permission to enter your territory.”
For all his courtly bow, there was nothing about Frek that would indicate his royal birth. He fairly vibrated with tension and aggression. His black pants sat low on narrow hips, and a dark grey sleeveless top showed off the muscles of his arms and his beautiful skin that was the same colour as one of my favourite sweets. His skin was halfway between the pale cream of the Hrenkie and the bright gold of the Allorians, but he didn’t shimmer like the Allorians did.
Weapons holsters and sheaths covered his thighs, stomach and forearms, but all were empty. A quick glance at the other males showed they were also covered in empty holsters and sheaths. Who were they? Why had they been armed so heavily? Were they some kind of soldiers? Or mercenaries? That would explain why they seemed so dangerous.
“Your visit is quite a surprise, Frek Nar Ortalon. I expected to see you long before now. I was starting to believe you had no interest in the son my daughter bore you,” my father replied in a voice that told me he was bordering on furious.
“Your Majesty, I had no idea I had a son. When Alita didn’t contact me, I assumed she had a female child. We agreed she would only contact me if she had a male child. Not that I would have no interest in any child of mine, but a female child cannot ascend the throne of Alloria, and I believe forcing my way into the life of a child who has two parents that love them already would be disruptive and confusing for the child. Alexia contacting me to warn me of my father’s impending visit and the danger to my son was the first I knew of his existence,” Frek growled.
Oh, dear! He was so angry! I was surprised steam wasn’t pouring out of his ears. His golden eyes flashed dark and dangerous in the bright light of the receiving room.
“I see.”
My father’s voice had lost some of its hard edge.
“It appears I will have to speak to my daughters about the correct protocols when dealing with the royal houses of foreign planets.”
The blood drained from my face as I swayed on the spot. Oh, dear God! I was going to cop it. Frek’s gaze flicked to me and our stares met for a long moment—a moment in which I felt a strange sensation shoot through me. It felt like fingers had brushed through the inside of my body, caressing, teasing, and inciting my need into a frenzy. It took all my control not to flee to my room and sob from the pain.
“Bartelnar, who are the prince’s companions?” my father asked the Lord Steward.
Frek stepped back as another male stepped forward. I stifled a gasp. Danger absolutely screamed off this male. The air around him seemed to shimmer with repressed violence. His long deep, deep blue hair hung in a sleek curtain down either side of his face, which was scarred just like mine, and he had little bumps on his forehead, just under the skin.
“Agix, son of Telisorra of the planet Telisor,” Bartelnar said.
Nobody uttered a sound. My parents had made sure my siblings and I knew of every planet in the Coalition and their ruling families or governments and many that were not part of the Coalition as well. We all knew Telisor didn’t have a monarchy or a ruling government. They had a goddess, and her name was Telisorra. We were in the presence of a demi-god, and he did not bow, as if he knew he was above all of us mere mortals. I glanced at Frek to find him grimacing as though he was in pain, but his gaze was on me. His dominance beat at me from across the room. I looked away quickly, since looking into his eyes just seemed to make things worse.
“You honour us with your presence, Agix. May we offer you all the hospitality of our home?” My father inclined his head as he spoke.
The male returned the gesture and stepped back and another male stepped forward. There was something primal about this male. Colourful tattoos covered his neck and hands. This male was probably the most dangerous out of all of them simply because of his unpredictability.
“Domique Retrafne the Second. Twin brother to the king of Radnassil,” Bartelnar announced.
I sucked in a breath. The people of Radnassil were shapeshifters. No wonder he had a primal air to him.
The male bowed. Another courtly practiced movement. “Your Majesties. Although I am not here on official business, I am pleased to make your acquaintance.”
His voice surprised me. I’d expected a cultured, refined voice. Instead, his voice was such a hard rasp, it sounded like talking was actually painful for him. I couldn’t stop myself from glancing at Frek this time, and again his gaze was on me. I felt heat rise in my body and flush my face as our gazes met. He’s so intense!
“Welcome to Borakoy, Prince of Radnassil,” my father murmured, but I could hear the hint of respect in his tone.
The male stepped back and the next male stepped forward. Bartelnar introduced the next four males. A duke, the son of a war lord, the protector of a goddess, and a royal hunter. The last male stepped forward holding the hand of the female.
“Captain of the Fallen Star, Tor’Arr of the Torc and his human mate Tarnee Stevens,” Bartelnar announced with a slight quaver in his voice.
Oh, my God! A Torc, here? They never left their planet. What was a Torc doing here? I gaped at the male, completely speechless. My sister gripped my arm so tight it hurt. I flicked my gaze to Frek, but he wasn’t looking at me. He was watching my father.
A low chuckle came from my father, escalating until he was laughing uproariously. I turned to watch him launch himself out of his chair and stride down to the taller male, royal robes and all, and pull him into a tight embrace. To shock me even further, the handsome male, who looked like a human, grinned and hugged my father back.
“You sly old lox. It has been too long!” my father exclaimed as he stepped back.
“Thirty-six years is not so long, Alkendar. You haven’t changed a bit. You still like to throw that royal attitude around,” the male replied.
“You look good, old friend. Humanity suits you. You have some impressive males in your crew, Tor’Arr. Did you raid every royal house between The Fortress and the Dead Zone?”
My father’s voice was filled with amusement.
The tall male chuckled. “Of course not. They all came to me eager and willing.”
He slid his gaze to the side, but I couldn’t tell which male he was looking at.
“Well, most of them.”
My father laughed again, but it sounded slightly strained, then turned to Bartelnar. “Lord Steward, please see these males to their suites so they may rest before dinner, and give them back their weapons.” He looked at Tor’Arr and added, “Join my family for our evening meal. You and your crew are all welcome. I will introduce you to my Empress and our children.”
It seemed everyone was dismissed. I turned to sneak out of the receiving room before my father could catch me, but I was nowhere near quick enough to evade my father’s razor sharp gaze.
“Alexia, present yourself to my office immediately,” my father ordered.
Great. Things were about to get complicated. I snuck a quick glance at Frek to find his burning golden gaze on me, sending a spasm of need through me and ripping a pained gasp from my lips, before I hightailed it out the door.
By the time I was standing in my father’s office looking out the windows, I had tears running down my face. God, I was so tired. I hadn’t slept properly since the conversation with Frek six days ago. An hour here and there was all I’d been able to manage.
I was holding on by a fine thread. I’d be reduced to begging soon, and the indignity of that would destroy me far more quickly than the fear of another initiation ceremony. The thought of a male other than Frek touching me turned my stomach.
“Alexia.”
My father’s voice ripped a gasp from me. I hadn’t even heard him enter the room.
Swiping at the tears wetting my face, I turned to look up at him. The firm, unflappable monarch was gone and in his place was my father. Anger was in his gaze, a gaze that was so much like mine. He had more black in his eyes than I did, but the deep pink was the same colour.
I stayed as far away from him as I could while he studied me.
“Did you know Alita hadn’t contacted the Crown Prince of Alloria and notified him of Alek’s birth?” he asked, his voice a low growl.
That was not what I’d expected my father to say. “No, I only found out a week ago,” I replied. I had a feeling Alita was going to be in far more trouble than I was in.
“So why did you contact Frek Nar Ortalon?”
“I had a vision. If Frek wasn’t here when the King of Alloria arrived, Alek would be in danger. I kept seeing his dead body over and over, but if Frek was here, he would be all right. I went to Alita to tell her and get her to contact Frek, but she refused and told me Jarrel had made her promise never to get in contact with him.” I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “So I did.”
My father rubbed a hand through his shaggy black hair. Unlike females, Borakoy male’s hair darkened with age until it went black. My father’s hair had been black for the last five years. He turned away from me and swept his gaze over his desk. It was a huge construction made from the timber of a merlioc tree. The timber’s perfume filled his office with a subtle crisp fresh smell that held a hint of honey.
“Alexia, there are protocols that need to be adhered to when the royal family of a planet initiates contact with the royal family of another planet. You have broken almost every one of those protocols. I understand you only did what you thought was right, but you should have come to me and explained. As a result of your actions, we now have the most dangerous and wanted crew of pirates in the Outer Rim with their ship in our orbit,” he said as he moved into lecture mode.
I gaped at him then spluttered, “P-p-pirates? But I thought their captain was your friend? How do you know they’re pirates?”
“When Arik came to me last night and told me they would be arriving today, I did a little research on the Fallen Star. I didn’t find out who their captain was, but I did find out about their reputation for being brutal, dangerous criminals. And yes, Tor’Arr is my friend, but I know what kind of male he is, Alexia, and I would not have invited him into my home without taking the proper precautions first.”
Good Lord, was he really that dangerous? He’d seemed the least dangerous out of all of the males who had come with Frek. Then again, I’d thought he was human. Knowing he was Torc and what they were capable of, I started to understand my father’s concern.
“I’m sorry, Papa. I was so worried about Alek, and I thought there wasn’t any time to come to you.”
“I’m sorry, too, Alexia. Your decision was impulsive, irresponsible and could have put your people in danger. As punishment for your actions, you will not be attending the ball you and your mother have been planning for tomorrow night.”
It was less than I was expecting, although attending the ball would have been a joy if I wasn’t caught up in Craving. Having to be around that many people and hide what was happening to me would have been almost impossible. I nodded at my father and started to walk towards him, intent on leaving. A fine tremble had started to work its way through my limbs from having to hide my need and pain.
He grasped my arm as I passed him, his grip loose and gentle, but I stopped dead, anxiety and fear swirling in my already painfully clenched stomach.
“Why didn’t you tell me you’d entered your Craving again, Alexia?”
Tears stung my eyes as I looked up at my father. “Because I can’t go through another ceremony, Papa. The thought of the young males getting anywhere near me terrifies me. I can’t do it again. I’d rather go mad than go through that again.”
Every time I looked in the mirror or took my clothes off, I remembered what had been done to me. My younger sister would be tested very thoroughly to make sure something similar didn’t happen to her.
“When did it start? The day you locked yourself in your room?” my father asked, before his eyes flared wide. “The day you contacted Frek.”
I winced and looked away because I hadn’t wanted him to know that. He was far too astute, and it wouldn’t take much for him to figure out how I felt about Frek now that he was here.
“I’ll take that as a yes, Alexia. You have a decision to make. I have a list of males who have passed their initiation and would be suitable to ease you through your Craving. All are suitable to be the father of your first child and I have families waiting for you to conceive so they may bid for you to join with their marriageable sons. I will not stand by and watch you suffer. If you do not make a decision, I will make one for you.”
A low cry erupted from me. “No!” I tugged on my arm, but my father tightened his hand.
“Give me one good reason why not, Alexia.” Now he was getting angry.
“I don’t want them touching me. The thought of having to... having to be with a male I don’t like turns my stomach.”
My father let out a low frustrated sound.
“Then tell me who you do want touching you, Alexia, and I will organise it for you. Name any male and I will make it happen, unless he is already married.”
I shook my head at him. “You don’t understand,” I cried. “I don’t want it to be someone who has no feelings for me. I don’t want it to be someone who is just doing it because you offered them money or some other kind of benefit. I want someone who genuinely likes me and wants to be with me. Look at me, Papa. Really look at me. You can’t honestly believe the males you have on your list want to go to bed with me!”
“I do look at you, Lexie, every day, and do you know what I see? I see a stunningly beautiful young female who is brave, resilient and has a heart bigger than anyone I’ve ever known. You will make the most wonderful mother and make a male an excellent wife. I only want what’s best for you, and I know that is getting you past this obstacle.”
Tears were burning a hot wet path down my face. I drew in a ragged breath. “Then let me pick someone. Let me find someone who can bear to look at me. Let me find someone who isn’t going to need help to be able to perform.”
The look on my father’s face said everything I needed to know. Chemical help to get an erection and actually be able to have sex with me was already something he’d considered. The knowledge cut like a knife through my heart.
“Fine. You have three days to find someone, Alexia. After that, I will make the decision for you and have you drugged if that is what it takes. I will not lose one of my children to the madness of Craving.”
The tone of my father’s voice told me in no uncertain terms that he was perfectly serious and he would do exactly what he said.
I stared up at him and felt more betrayed than I’d felt when the young male chosen for my initiation had cut into me with a knife. A sob ripped from me as I turned and ran.