Okay, so this was bad. But it could’ve been worse.
Brent: What’s up?
I smiled at the screen of my cell phone. Brent and I had been texting back and forth since I’d left school, and he was worried about Holly.
But I’d be alone in the house—at least, as far as Holly knew—while she was in the hospital for the night.
I felt a little guilty getting so much good out of her misfortune, but…hey, I wasn’t about to complain. It was rare for us to be able to spend the night together.
I closed the front door behind me and pulled out my phone.
Jesse: Do you want to just come over?
Brent: What time d’you want me there hon?
Jesse: Have you eaten?
Brent: No, not yet. Why, you gonna cook for me?
I decided to call instead of continuing to text.
Brent’s family knew about us, but I hadn’t gotten around to telling Holly yet. She didn’t even know I was gay. I figured that eventually, she’d figure it out—y’know, catch us making out, same as Alex had a couple months ago—and we’d talk, and all would be well in the world.
I hoped.
Until then, though, Brent and I kind of walked on eggshells while she was home. He was just a friend who was over to do homework with me. I wasn’t sure if I’d ever even properly introduced them to each other, avoiding it most of the time so that I didn’t accidentally out myself.
“Hello?”
“Hey, babe.”
“So I hear I have a sexy personal chef tonight.”
I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help but grin. “Well, I figure that we have the place to ourselves, which is pretty awesome, and we both need to eat, so…”
“…so this way maximizes the time we have together. Gotcha.”
“Your parents are letting you have the car tonight, I take it?” I shrugged my coat off and grabbed a hanger from the closet.
“Actually, no, but Dad’ll drop me off. He says hi, by the way.”
“Hi back. I’m thinking pasta with a chicken breast for dinner tonight. Sound good?”
“Sounds fine to me,” he said.
“I can have it ready in twenty or so, I’d think…hmm, hold on a second…” I opened the freezer to peer inside.
“What?”
“Can you bring me over some green beans? I mean, I’m sure you’ve got some.”
“You don’t like them, though.” He sounded completely confused, and my heart skipped a beat.
Every little thing about him made me sigh happily—we were still in the “honeymoon” phase, I guess. Even knowing that was all it was, I still went out of my way to make those moments happen. I mean, what was wrong with making myself smile a little?
“Yeah, but you do, so I’ll suffer through the horrible green punishment for you.”
“I don’t know where the hell I managed to find you.”
“Yeah, you do. School. Now get your ass over here so we can eat.”
“How romantic! Give me half an hour, and I’ll be on your doorstep, bearing a vegetable you despise.”
“How romantic.”
“Love you.”
“Love you too, babe. See you soon.” I hung up and tossed my phone onto the couch then shrugged and threw myself over the arm of the couch to lie down. I had at least a few minutes to kill waiting for him to show up. I could put off starting the pasta.
#
The doorbell chimed a half hour later, barely audible above my music.
I walked to the door, unlocked and opened it; Brent had already opened the screen door and leaned in to kiss me.
“Hey, babe.”
“Hey.”
“How’re you doing?”
“I’ve been better, I guess. Pasta should be just about ready,” I said, angling myself so that he could get past me and we could get inside to food and warmth. It was cold out, and it’d been warm the week before, so single-digit Celsius did not feel liveable right now.
“Yeah, well, that’s really not why I came over here this early,” Brent said, leaning in for another kiss and pulling me in to his chest.
Oh, lord, do I need this after the day I just had. “Thank you.”
Brent didn’t say anything back to that, just kind of hummed in agreement and continued hugging me, resting his chin on my shoulder.
We stood there for a few minutes until I heard the oven’s timer. I knew it would keep beeping at me until I turned it off.
“Ah, hell.” I disentangled myself from his arms and moved towards the kitchen to start serving up the basic dinner. “I’ll probably have everything put together on plates before you’re ready in the dining room.”
“Jess.”
I turned around and yelped as he leaned in for another quick peck to the cheek. I smacked him on the shoulder. “Ass.”
He snickered and turned towards the front door. I shook my head and took the chicken out of the oven.
I was almost right. By the time he’d gotten his shoes and jacket off and washed his hands, I had everything put together except the sauce on the pasta.
And—shit, the green beans!
“Did you bring the dreaded vegetables of doom?”
“The green beans?”
“Yeah, those ones.”
“Nope.”
“I didn’t think you would. Love you.”
He just laughed. “How could I bring you something that you hated for dinner when you’ve had such an awful day?” Ignoring his food, he pulled me into his arms again, touching foreheads.
Our hands were around each other’s waists, and I used the opportunity to grab at his ass. He softly kissed me on the nose and sighed.
Not exactly the reaction I was looking for.
“I know you said Holly’s okay, but…are you sure you’re okay?”
I smiled, if maybe a little weakly. “I…” I sighed. “Yes and no. I’ve been better, and I’m still sort of in shock. I mean, Holly technically died today, and I’m having trouble kind of…fitting that into the schema of ‘what makes sense in the world,’ if you know what I mean.”
“Schema. Nice. Way to pay attention in psych last week.”
“Making it make sense, then. Happy?”
“Nerd.”
“Jock.”
“Oooh, the burn!”
“Can’t help that I’m hot, babe.”
He just laughed at that and leaned in for a much, much more satisfying kiss.
I pulled back before it could get out of hand and grabbed the two plates of dinner. “Okay, let’s get ourselves fed first, before this gets too cold.” I looked behind me to see him turn off the burner—oops!—and then look in the fridge.
“What should I grab us for a drink?”
“I don’t think Holly would argue with us having a glass of wine with dinner, do you?”
“Well, I don’t really know her, but sure.”
I winced a little bit at the annoyance in his voice. Once we were both seated, I said, “Hon, you know I don’t hide you from her on purpose.”
“You don’t tell her about me, either.”
I scowled at my food, twirling a few strands of spaghetti around my fork to mull that over. It was true, and I couldn’t find a way to wiggle out of it.
“I don’t see what the big deal is. Just tell her that we’re together—”
“Drop it, okay?” I rubbed my leg up and down his and smiled. It was taking all of my inner reserves of strength not to show how annoyed I was getting at his pushing. “It’s fine, I’m not mad. Just…it’s fine, okay?”
I gave him an obviously fake brilliant grin, and he laughed. The rest of dinner was all but silent, though.
#
I woke up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and stumbled out into the hall without bothering with clothes.
I was definitely not expecting to bump into my sister, and I was not amused to do so in the nude. I was awake enough, at least, to cover up my crotch as she rounded the corner, but it was still incredibly awkward.
“Uh, hey, Jesse.” She at least had the decency to lift a hand to block off my lower body, even if it was three a.m.
“Hi…uh, Holly. How the hell are you not—shouldn’t you be in the hospital? For, y’know, the entire night?” I could feel the blush creeping up my neck.
“I’m feeling fine and haven’t had painkillers in barely the right length of time for them to classify me as all better.”
“Really? That’s what they need?”
“No, but I was told that’s part of it. They need the doctor’s say-so, I think, but he told me that was what would get me his approval to go home. Poor bastard’s pulling a really late shift, I think, so we talked—”
“Listen, this is fascinating, I swear, but really. Holly. Go get some sleep or something, and we can talk about this tomorrow when I’m not standing here naked, okay?”
I winced as I realized what she was probably going to say. Don’t suggest going to my room.
“Well, we could go back to your room and hang out for a bit, if you’re up anyway.”
“I…uh.” Nope. “No, that’s okay, sis.”
“Sis?” She raised an eyebrow.
Of course you’d pick up on that. “I’m half-asleep, and, uh…”
“So I was right—you have a girl over!”
Okay, she used a specific gender. I don’t want to have this conversation right here, right now, and definitely not while I’m naked and Brent’s right there and is probably naked too, and why did you have to come home right now?!
“I’ve…got someone over, yeah.”
“Awesome. Okay, just…wanted to see if my gut was right.”
I blinked. Oh, probably not.
“Sure.”
She leaned over towards my bedroom and gave me an exaggerated wink.
I just died a little. Lord, please never do that again.
“I’ll leave you two alone for the night, then. I’ll be out of your hair in a couple hours!”
I nodded and waited for her to get to her room before I slipped back into mine, still lit only by candles, and sighed. “That was close. And more than a little mortifying.”
“She didn’t see me, did she?” Brent had gone a moment before, though he’d been smart enough—or lucky enough—to be wearing pants. His face was ghostly white, and I could feel my heart hammering as I shook my head, trying to fake calm.
“Nah, I don’t think so. She would have said something.”
Still, it took a while for either of us to relax again. We cuddled silently, both of us staring at the ceiling until our heart rates could go back down enough to sleep.