Chapter Twenty

 

A week and a half later, I wasn't so hopeful, patient, or placated. Not since I woke up alone the next morning with Cannibal nowhere to be found.

I'd wandered around the house to no avail. Even phone calls went directly to voice mail. I did stumble across one item, though. He'd left a note on the kitchen table, at least hinting at his whereabouts. I'd read it so many times it was permanently burned into my brain.

 

Duty calls. Pick up the mail and take care of the house while I'm gone. I expect proficiency on the self-defense skills I taught you when I return.

 

That was it. No, I'll miss you. No, the timing stinks. No hugs, kisses, until I return, or I love you. Just a note outlining my chores until he returned from wherever he'd traipsed off to. Or teleported. Considering his car remained in the garage, either a buddy picked him up or he went air dragon, as Titus coined the phrase.

For the first couple of days, I managed hopeful cheeriness. The next few, reality began to set in. Today, my excitement and expectations hit an all-time low. The hard truth flashed blaringly in my face. Cannibal had run.

He'd dashed off on a mission without waking me to say goodbye for a reason. Namely because I'd opened my trap, confessed my love, and sent him scurrying from a scary future consisting of me attached to his hip like a ball and chain. Was I angry? Yes. At myself. I couldn't blame him for not returning my feelings. After all, we don't always get to choose who we fall in love with. Cannibal couldn't just wave his hand and make those emotions appear. Or could he?

I snorted and shook my head. As wonderful as a love spell sounded, it wasn't the answer. I needed honesty and sincerity one way or the other.

I might not be mad at Cannibal, but he bore the brunt of my frustration. Twice I'd told him I loved him and he had yet to even broach the topic. While he certainly didn't need to lie if he didn't feel the same, he could at least give me a hint what his intentions were. Leaving me hanging bordered on cruel and unusual punishment, not to mention was driving me insane.

All sorts of ideas bombarded my mind surrounding his tight-lipped non-response and quick departure. Everything from I'd failed as a lover and bedmate to he was fighting his love for me ran through my head like a tickertape. Endlessly. Unfortunately, nothing held more weight than the other, though I leaned heavily toward the former than the latter.

Truthfully, I felt like we'd gotten what we could out of a one-night stand propelled by adrenaline, near death experiences, and a couple of days playing house. With the dawn came clarity offered by the real world. I'd fallen in love with a man who couldn't love me in return. Just another notch on his bedpost.

And that sentiment shoved my shoulders down in defeat, put a definite bite in my attitude, and firmly put men in the don't bother category.

I'd spent the past ten days driving back and forth between his house and my apartment, fulfilling his orders. Heck, I'd even sucked it up and turned into a maid, cleaning his place from top to bottom until the smell of bleach and cleanliness nearly burned my nostrils. My apartment received the same treatment, although with less harsh fumes lingering.

I drove myself halfway nuts, make that all the way nuts, wondering and worrying, with no answers to be found. Each night I tossed and turned, hardly able to sleep. How many times had I lectured myself to get over it? Dozens? But it didn't help. My heart stubbornly refused to budge on the subject of Cannibal.

Each day I waited. For a call, a sign. Filled in the gaps as best I could. All the while, fear remained my constant companion. Fear Cannibal would return only to reject me and fear he'd never return at all.

Worn out and weary, I clung to my last thread of sanity and hope.

I parked my car outside his garage, pulled my coat around me, and hustled to the mailbox. With a couple of letters in hand, I dug out the keys, stomped my feet to get the leftover snow out of the treads, then let myself in.

Warmth met me as well as something else. Cannibal sat on the living room couch polishing his sword.

Emotions welled up, everything from giddiness at his safe return to frank irritation at his lack of a phone call to notify me he'd made it home.

He glanced up, the all too familiar frown painted on his face.

Looks like he's thrilled to see me too. His expression threw my happiness to the wind and allowed anger to take a firm foothold. I grumbled to myself, shut the front door behind me, and strode to stand in front of him. "You're back."

"Yeah."

"In one piece?"

His eyebrows furrowed as his lips thinned. "Yeah."

"Good. I'd hate to have to break in another Enforcer at this late date." With those words, I headed into the kitchen and tossed the envelopes on top of the small pile of mail on the table.

Since he was here, I might as well make something for the hyena to eat. I might be annoyed with the big lug, but that didn't mean I wanted to storm back out. That tiny sliver of optimism had me digging in the fridge and tossing together a hot meal.

An hour later, he ventured into the kitchen, took his seat at the table, and started filling his plate with goulash, vegetables, and a breadstick.

I'd spent the time working on leashing my temper, shoving aside the pain of his rejection, and forcing a stoic expression on my face and my view of the world. No sense crying over spilled milk. Or a man who happened to be the kind for one-night stands.

"When did you get home?" I spooned some pasta into my plate and took a bite.

"Before dawn."

And you didn't bother to call? I bit my tongue to keep from uttering the blunt accusation. As an adult and my boss, he didn't have to check in. Sure, as a lover, it would have been considerate, maybe even expected. But, since I had no clue where we stood on that issue, I opted to shut my mouth and stay well away from pettiness.

"Where did you go?"

"Classified."

I wanted to beat my head against the table. We were back to day one of the Cannibal experience. I hated it then and even more so now. Hell, we'd shared a bed together and all he could say was clipped, one and two word answers?

Don't show fear and don't back down. I could hear Shy's advice beating at me.

With a sigh, I took a few more bites, then carried my plate to the sink. My appetite had fled along with my sanity several days ago.

"Aren't you hungry?" For the first time concern flashed through his eyes.

"Not really."

He studied me for a moment, then gave a brief nod.

Whatever that gesture meant, I didn't have a clue. So, I started loading the dishwasher and played the waiting game.

Cannibal continued eating in silence. By the time he finished, I was ready to explode, demand some answers, or pull my hair out. Maybe all. "Cannibal—"

His phone rang. Instantly, he answered. "Yeah?"

I blew out a breath and prayed for patience.

"What the hell? Now? Where? Well, shit. Fine." He punched his phone with a bit more force than necessary to end the call.

My anxiety escalated. "Now what?"

"Another mission. Seems some lackwit wizard got himself captured. We've been nominated to rescue him."

My mouth fell open. "Wait. What?" My anger forgotten, I tried to make sense of what he just said. He spoke in English, I knew that. The rest came across as a hodgepodge.

"We're going on a wizard rescue." He walked out of the kitchen.

I started the dishwasher and hurried after him. "What's up with all the wizard problems lately? Heck, I didn't know any existed. Now they're popping out of the woodwork. All of them with freaky issues." I had such fond memories of our last wizard adventure. Not. Fireballs, certain death, an imploding castle, and falling off the roof left a lot to be desired on a vacation brochure. I wasn't sure I was up for another round of such fun.

He yanked a duffle bag out of his closet and started filling it with clothes.

"I'll have to swing by my apartment and pick up some things."

He grunted in answer.

I groaned under my breath. Another overnight assignment. With one pain in the ass dragon. Not exactly what I needed right now. I put the skids on. "Why us?"

"Dragons and wizards understand one another."

"Like a mailman and a mean dog?"

"Something like that." His scowl had slid back into place.

"Since you were around for the Knights of the Round Table, you drew the short straw? It must suck to be ancient." My flippant tone spoke volumes on how I felt about this latest development, especially since I hadn't finished processing the last one.

He shot me a glare.

"At least tell me he's friendly, more receptive to visitors, and less likely to blow us into tiny bits and pieces just for dropping by."

"Supposedly, he is."

"Supposedly? Yeah, that makes me feel so much better." I huffed and gathered up my coat. "Care to tell me why I'm tagging along?" Long silence followed. My patience at an end, I waved my hand. "Oh, never mind. I'll figure it out along the way."

 

*****

 

Along the way wasn't as long as I guessed it to be, especially when Cannibal decided to travel air dragon once more. I can't say I preferred the mode of transportation, but I'd give it kudos for efficiency.

Tucked up against Cannibal's gorgeous body, holding onto him tightly, lest he lose me somewhere between home and Scotland, only added to my desire to climb back into his bed and let him take me to rapture and back. To throw caution to the wind and conveniently forget the barrier in our relationship path.

I might have done just that, if he hadn't released me as soon as we arrived, dragged me down a long path, and entered an inn of sorts. With the time difference, the sun rapidly dropped in the sky meant night would arrive in minutes.

"Reservation for Steel."

Steel? If Cannibal had a last name, I'd never heard it before. Perhaps he made it up, or that was a name he'd picked to traverse society through the ages. While it suited, it also described the walls around his heart.

And, here I was without a blowtorch.

The lady nodded, typed in the computer, and produced a couple of keys. She handed them over with a dreamy smile. "Top of the stairs, last rooms on the right."

Cannibal thanked her, adjusted his duffle bag on his shoulder, then gestured for me to lead the way. Tempted to thump him with my overnight bag, I opted to behave in public. Besides, the woman said rooms. Plural. Both a relief and a disappointment.

Sure enough, Cannibal had booked us adjoining rooms. Both had doors to the hallway, while another one inside allowed free access to both areas. "This is nice, but I'm surprised we're spending the night instead of jumping into the rescue mission."

He walked around the first room, opened the connecting door, and dropped his duffle bag in the other one.

I peeked through, curious as to what the other side looked like. Pretty much the same as mine, except the bed was turned to face my room instead of the hallway.

"I need to meet with an informant this evening and to check out the location. I'm not about to rush in without seeing what we're up against first."

Strategy. Good thinking. "Sensible." Most likely storming the castle didn't prove as successful in real life as in the movies.

"So, what are we going to do for the next day or so?"

Cannibal spared me a glance, one so hot, I almost expected the floor to catch fire under my feet. "Play tourist. Blend in."

And see if the passion still existed between us.

I refrained from fanning myself. Instead, I pulled on my stubborn nature and reminded myself that I was interested in long-term, not a convenient fling. Although that looked pretty damn nice right now.

"Why did you get separate rooms?" I blurted out the question burning in my mind.

His eyes pinned mine. "This is a business trip. Not pleasure."

Why can't we mix the two? The words died on the tip of my tongue. Another slash caused my heart to bleed. "I see. Which puts us back to the beginning. Why am I here?"

Cannibal frowned, strode to the threshold, and leaned against the doorway. He crossed his arms over his broad chest, drawing attention to his ripped shoulders and arms under his long-sleeved shirt. "Because."

I waited. And waited. No other answer appeared.

Irritated, I put my hands on my hips. "That's it? Just because?"

"Yep."

Throwing up my hands, I glared at him. "I don't mind coming along for the ride, fighting the forces of evil without a cape or battle pay, but at least have the dignity to give me a straight answer for once."

His scowl deepened. The unbudging body language told me all I needed to know. Cannibal wasn't spouting off any secrets today. Maybe never.

Whatever happened between us that night affected him in a major way. I wished I knew how, so I could navigate these uncharted waters without crashing and drowning, as I seemed to be doing right now.

Irritated and tired, I came to the end of my rope. I tossed my bag down and unzipped it, anger making me slam the poor innocent bag around. "Men suck. Why I thought I could work closely with one for six weeks is beyond me. Goes to show how stupid I am."

Cannibal crossed the room in three long strides. "What the hell is your problem? You've been chewing on my ass since I got back home."

"Nothing." I flung the word back at him.

He narrowed his eyes. "I told you I can detect lies. I'd blame it on your raggy hormones, but your scent tells me you're past that point."

Now he's sniffing me to find out if I'm on my period? Oh, hell, no. "Everything is fine!"

"The hell it is!" he snarled and ran one hand through his hair in obvious exasperation. "Look, I've had very little sleep in the past week. I'm well past due for downtime. But, no. I'm sent out on yet another ridiculous wizard problem with a gopher who is in a snit over no telling what."

I clammed up, stubbornly refusing to blurt out a single clue.

He threw his arms up in the air. "Fuck it. I'm too tired to deal with this shit right now." He spun around, marched through the adjoining door, and slammed it in his wake.

Jet lag only added to my irritability. I wanted to barge through the door and kick the lizard in the shin. Instead, I stomped my foot and counted to ten. Twice. It didn't help.