She’s scared. Softly does it. Brody, now hands free from the mugger, tipped his hand slightly in Bullet’s direction. Bullet sank to his belly beside him, not taking his eyes off the woman and her child. The gathered crowd were leaving the park now, the occasional backward glance in their direction. People always surprised Brody, both in good and bad ways. His colleagues had bundled the offender into the van and taken him back to the station. Brody had elected to stay behind, to check on the woman, take some details. His colleagues on the force had been keen to check up on them both, but something about the woman had made something in him hold them back, to give her a minute. Looking across at Bullet, who was still staring at the pair intently, told his partner everything he needed to know. Everything that he was feeling himself. Instinct.
‘I’m Andrew Brody. I’m an off-duty police officer. I’m sorry if Bullet here startled you, but he never did like days off. You going to be okay?’
‘I’ll be fine. I don’t think he got anything in the end.’
‘Where do you live? Are you local?’
She nodded her head but didn’t meet his eyes. Her shoulders were scrunched up, curved like wings as she held her baby tight. The little one was the spitting image of her mother.
‘She yours?’
The flinch that jolted from the body of the woman before him shocked them all. The little one stirred, crying for a half-minute before settling down again. He clocked the woman’s shaky hands. Bullet whined once at the side of him, and Brody nodded to him in response. Leaning in a little closer, squatting in front of her, he tried a different tack.
‘She’s beautiful. What’s her name?’
‘Ava. Thank you.’
He leaned in, just a half-inch closer to take in the baby’s face fully for the first time.
‘She’s your daughter?’
‘Yes. I’m Hannah.’
‘Hi, Hannah. I need to ask you a few questions, if you will.’ She opened her mouth, a look of panic on her face. ‘Later, of course. I would like to get you and Ava checked over medically first.’
‘We’re fine. I’ve checked her over. I just really want to get home.’
‘Where’s home?’
That look again, like he’d asked her for her inside leg measurement.
‘I’m sorry. I have to ask these questions. You’ve been the victim of a crime, and we need details.’
‘I don’t want to press any charges. You have him, don’t you?’
Brody said nothing, waiting for her to fill the space in conversation. She didn’t; instead, she was up on her feet, heading towards her belongings. Her back was ramrod straight as she turned away from him, departing with steady steps across the grass. Bullet was still sitting down just behind Brody, watching the whole scene in his usual easy way. She stopped in front of him abruptly, and Brody watched Bullet look up at her. After a moment, she walked back and bent down and stroked the dog behind the ears.
‘Thank you,’ Brody heard her say softly to the hound, and Bullet, being the ever-stoic dog he was, looked up at her in his customary calm way. Brody always wondered what the dog was thinking when he did this, but then Bullet surprised him. Leaning forward, he sniffed at the baby, and then licked Hannah’s hand before sitting back down in front of them both.
‘Good boy.’
She continued to walk to her pram, checking the interior for damage or scuffle debris, before strapping her now calm baby daughter in. Brody approached her slowly, taking his time to stand next to the dog. She looked across at him, flashing him a little tiny smile before looking away again. She’s pretty when she smiles. The thought popped into his head just as quickly as he dismissed it. He wasn’t in the habit of checking out members of the public, let alone a woman with a baby who had just endured a very scary mugging. The perp was on the way back to the station now with his colleagues, no doubt pleading his case very loudly in the back of the police transport vehicle. He’d have to file a report on the crime when he got to the station for his afternoon shift, and he needed further details, but something about this woman made him drag his feet.
‘Do I have to make a statement?’ She was looking at him, pram handles in hand. She still appeared flushed in the face, her movements fast, jerky. ‘I did have things I needed to get done today.’ She checked the bag on the back of the pram, unzipping and zipping it back up tight.
‘You can come to the station, make one later this afternoon? The mugger is known to us, so I can’t see there being much trouble with the charge.’ He looked around at the people in the park, waving one of his arms in their direction. ‘Plenty of witnesses, my colleagues who attended took their details. I do still need to take yours though.’ He reached into his pocket and took out a little notebook he kept with him. ‘If you ask for Brody, I’ll be around.’ He looked up from his pad at her, a gentle smile playing across his features. ‘That okay with you?’
Hannah looked from the pad, to Bullet, and back to him. ‘I really don’t want to get involved; I’d just like to forget to be honest.’
Brody understood, but he frowned anyway. ‘Your choice. We are here to help though, and this guy has a record. You could stop him from hurting someone else.’
Something flashed in her eyes, silencing the rest of his usual pep talk. The one he trotted out to the victims, who were normally in shock and just wanting to get home, get over their ordeal in private. No one liked being reminded how dark and ugly the world could be.
‘What makes you think that?’ Her voice was stronger now. A sharp edge to her clipped tone.
‘Think what?’
‘That me making a statement will prevent a guy like him from doing this all again tomorrow.’
Brody was taken aback for a moment. The change in her; it startled him. She was watching him with the embers of fire in her eyes, waiting for his reply.
‘Well, we have him in custody. We have a lot of witnesses. And your statement if you choose to make one. The thing is …’
She’d never given her last name and he didn’t feel comfortable calling her Hannah in this moment.
‘The thing is, madam, we have the opportunity to deal with this crime. I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t have the public’s best interests at heart.’
‘I can’t make a statement, and it’s Hannah.’
‘It doesn’t have to be today.’ He could tell by her face that she’d made her mind up. Given that the last thing he wanted to do was harass a stressed mother, he didn’t really know what else to do.
‘I have to go.’ Her hands gripped the pram handles a little tighter, signalling her departure. Before he could register his actions, his contact details were in his hand.
‘Please, if you do change your mind, my details are on there or you can come to the station. We’re based just off the magistrates’ court in town.’
‘I won’t change my mind,’ she said, a little less forcefully this time. The two of them stared at each other for a moment. Brody was given the distinct impression that she was sizing him up just as much as he was her. His gut was practically roiling as he watched her, his arm still outstretched, the paper in his hand.
‘I really don’t want to get involved.’
The supermarket was more of a local store, rather than one of the chains. Hannah strapped her daughter into the baby seat, taking the trolley and heading down the first aisle. After the day she’d had already, looking at everything she didn’t have at home wasn’t helping. She thought back to her last home. Neatly painted walls, cupboards full of food. The gadgets that had sat on the kitchen worktops were worth more than the cash she’d brought with her. She marvelled at how life could change in a moment, and then pushed herself back into the present. She’d never needed all that stuff anyway. It was just the gilding on her former cage. She had no need of it.
She picked up the basics, staples for the cupboard, bits she needed for Ava, enough to stock her up for a few days. She needed to keep a low profile, given that her outing for Operation Get a New Life had gone from a quiet morning in the park to a very public mugging, and the aftermath. Plus the rather inquisitive off-duty officer. The image of his doubting features sprang into her head. She’d piqued his interest, which was a disaster in the making. The last thing she needed was to have the local law enforcement asking questions.
She was halfway along an aisle perusing the discount shelf when she caught a woman and man looking at her intently. The woman frowned, looking at her whilst talking out of the corner of her mouth. Her husband had his eyes set on Hannah now too, but he was shaking his head at his wife. Hannah put her head down, busying herself in the shelves, looking for the cheaper snacks to fill her cupboard. She reached for a pack of rice cakes, and accidently caught the woman’s eye.
‘Hi,’ the woman said, and she could see her husband rolling his eyes behind her. ‘Is it you?’
Hannah plastered her best smile on her face and laughed a little. ‘Is what me?’
‘Leave her alone, love. It’s not her.’
‘It is!’
Hannah wanted to grab Ava and run. Did the news of the mugging get around already? Surely not. Did this woman know who she was? Hannah found herself looking around for Victor, her heart pumping. Did he have people looking? What if he had gone to the police? Was her face on some poster somewhere? She swallowed hard, trying not to look terrified. Trying to stay as calm as the surface of a mill pond, while her legs frantically paddled beneath to keep her afloat.
‘I’m sorry,’ she told the couple. ‘I guess I must just have one of those faces. I don’t think we’ve met. Have a good day though.’ She put the packet in her hands into the trolley behind her daughter and made to leave.
The woman put a hand on the trolley handle, very close to Hannah’s own, and Hannah glared at her.
She was in no mood for talking to her anymore. She didn’t like this one bit. She didn’t recognise either of them, and it wasn’t like she had been going to many places since she’d arrived. What was the deal with this woman? She found that the anger and fear swirling within her had given her a stronger voice than usual.
‘If you could take your hand off my trolley.’ She looked pointedly at the hand still holding the trolley handle, and the woman blushed and removed it.
‘It’s not you, is it,’ she said sadly, and her face fell. ‘Harold?’
‘Come on, Joyce, it’s obviously not her. Leave the poor woman alone.’ He came to put his arm around his wife, his face a poster for awkward apologies. ‘Our daughter lives in Australia now, with her family. She looks like you, that’s all.’ He gave his wife a look of sad reproach and steered his trolley away from Hannah’s. ‘Joyce’s not been well lately, forgetful.’ Hannah looked at the tired man’s face and wondered what it was like to be so loved and cherished by someone. ‘She was convinced our window cleaner was one of her old school mates a bit ago. Nearly scared him off his ladder.’ He laughed, just once, but Hannah could tell it was a reflex.
Hannah let go the urge to run and gave the man her best understanding smile. ‘I understand.’
‘Sorry again.’
‘But …’ Joyce was still not ready to move on, but her husband tucked her into his arm.
‘No buts, Joyce, it’s not her. Carolyn’s in Australia, remember? We’ll talk to her later, on the computer. Come on, let’s get out of here.’
The pair of them walked away, deep in conversation. He was rubbing his wife’s arm, and Hannah watched them leave. Once they had left her sight, and she could breathe again, she looked at Ava. She was sitting placidly in the trolley seat, playing with a discounted bath book she’d picked up for her from the baby aisle. She went to move but found that her legs were shaking uncontrollably. That felt too close for a moment. She had to keep a low profile. It was a mistake this time, but it didn’t mean that she was feeling any safer. Not now, not so soon. She had thought that she might get more time, but she felt a sting of shame envelop her. She’d failed already. She’d come here and thought it would be okay. It would never, ever be okay.
She finished her shopping on autopilot, before heading home and locking the door behind them both. When she put Ava down later that night, she went to bed with her. She felt like she wanted her daughter close by. Safe. She dreamed of red-eyed wolves that night, snarling and nipping at her heels. She was in the park again, Ava screaming in her pram. There was no mugger this time, no man and dog coming to her rescue. This time, the mugger was an animal, and he never stopped till he’d found his prey.
She awoke panting, slick with sweat. Ava cried beside her, her little body shocked by the sudden commotion, before settling back into a restful slumber. Hannah watched her daughter breathe in and out, until sleep finally reclaimed her. She didn’t dream again that night. She had hoped the nightmares would be gone forever, but she realised she was kidding herself. There was no way to keep the wolves from the door. She’d already tried.